[quote
author=freshdude2 post=27217653]Valentine gifts, engagement and wedding
rings, general financial provision, "spoiling you", chivalry, treating
you like a woman(yet you behave like men) the list is endless, and the
hypocrisy nauseating. [/quote]

I don't desire all these. And any of the spouses can provide these. It doesn't necessarily have to be the man.

Chiamaka01:
I want him to live with me, because that's my wish not because it's the norm. Yes, i don't think kids raised by single parents are raised well. There is always something lacking in them. The more reason my husband should live with me.

Are u speaking based on evidence or personal experience

Because if i recall wella on this sexsion, the prevailig ethos is that there is no difference between children of two parent and single homes

freshdude2:
Therefore, you wouldn't mind if your man declined to give you an engagement ring or didn't spoil you or treated you like a woman? . Carefree, clean your mouth.

I am not a fan of engagement and marriage.I have said it many times.
But if I ever decide to marry then my partner and I will agree on it together. No need to propose. And I am willing to share all costs that come along with the engagement and the wedding. I do not mind doing it at all. It is just fair.

What do you mean by "spoil" me?

And what do you mean by treat me like a woman?

Chiamaka01:


I don't desire all these. And any of the spouses can provide these. It doesn't necessarily have to be the man.

So, what exactly do you need a man for except sex? I'd like to know

[quote
author=pickabeau1 post=27218247]


Are u speaking based on evidence or personal experience [/quote]

Based on evidence.

freshdude2:
So, what exactly do you need a man for except sex? I'd like to know

Companionship?

Chiamaka01:


Based on evidence.

Interesting. coming from a lady

Most ladies here tell us that a child raised by a single mother is not different and possibly interchangeable from that raised by a man and woman
I was fearful of the marriage instition when they pasted tomes and tomes supporting this

But this.. there is hope ...




TV01, crackhaus, freshdude2.. are u seeing what im seeing
A lady here says there is a difference in the two

There is yet hope

[quote
author=pickabeau1 post=27218453]


Interesting. coming from a lady

Most ladies here tell us that a child raised by a single mother is not
different and possibly interchangeable from that raised by a man and
woman
I was fearful of the marriage instition when they pasted tomes and tomes
supporting this

But this.. there is hope[/quote]

I am fully in support of the marriage institution. What i don't believe in is that the husband is the 'senior partner'.

Chiamaka01:


I am fully in support of the marriage institution. What i don't believe in is that the husband is the 'senior partner'.

Equality in marriage...
Your stance is clear.
The workability is another kettle of tea as experience has shown marriage like any institution needs leadership
Some are provided by men, others by women (yes! some women wear the pants in their marriage).. But who knows

Good debate so far

pickabeau1:


Equality in marriage...
Your stance is clear.
The workability is another kettle of tea as experience has shown marriage like any institution needs leadership
Some are provided by men, others by women (yes! some women wear the pants in their marriage).. But who knows

Good debate so far

Thanks. Same here.

carefreewannabe:


I am not a fan of engagement and marriage.I have said it many times.
But if I ever decide to marry then my partner and I will agree on it together. No need to propose. And I am willing to share all costs that come along with the engagement and the wedding. I do not mind doing it at all. It is just fair.

What do you mean by "spoil" me?

And what do you mean by treat me like a woman?

I assume spoiling you and treating you like a woman are self-explanatory. I'm sorry I don't know how to explain those concepts.

Chiamaka01:


Companionship?

Surely, you have friends.

freshdude2:
Surely, you have friends.

Friends don't last forever. I need someone who'll be with me for life and who i can share life with. Friends can't give me that.

pickabeau1:



Interesting. coming from a lady

Most ladies here tell us that a child raised by a single mother is not different and possibly interchangeable from that raised by a man and woman
I was fearful of the marriage instition when they pasted tomes and tomes supporting this

But this.. there is hope ...




TV01, crackhaus, freshdude2.. are u seeing what im seeing
A lady here says there is a difference in the two

There is yet hope

Bro the day some females on NL quit speaking/making comments from both sides of their mouth and bending opinions to suit a particular discourse on different threads, is the day I deactivate my account.

I see you also have a good memory, we need it in these days of endless contradictions.

crackhaus:

Bro the day some females on NL quit speaking/making comments from both sides of their mouth and bending opinions to suit a particular discourse on different threads, is the day I deactivate my account.

I see you also have a good memory, we need it in these days of endless contradictions.

Let me know on that day
I will also deactivate mine

Too many contradictions.. Na God go helep us

crackhaus:

Bro the day some females on NL quit speaking/making comments from both sides of their mouth and bending opinions to suit a particular discourse on different threads

C'est fini.

Chiamaka01:


Friends don't last forever. I need someone who'll be with me for life and who i can share life with. Friends can't give me that.

Marriages don't last any longer than other relationships due to nature. The so-called advanced people whom you model your world view after have the shittiest marriage life span records. You'd be better served putting more value into your non-marriage relationships.

What exactly is the problem here even? Is it that the women here want to keep only their father's name OR they want to hyphenate both their father's name and that of the husband?

Because I'm thinking if it's the latter, does that not also mean they have to go through the legal process of official name-change to reflect the new hyphenated surname?
And if this is the case, the excuse that it is too complicated undergoing a process of name change to that of the husband is still redundant, because it's the same complicated process they have to go through when adopting the hyphenated surname to affect all documents.

This whole ruckus is not even realistic, just some anonymous internet hullabaloo.

pickabeau1:


Let me know on that day
I will also deactivate mine

Too many contradictions.. Na God go helep us

I tell ya.

crackhaus:
What exactly is the problem here even? Is it that the women here want to keep only their father's name OR they want to hyphenate both their father's name and that of the husband?

Because I'm thinking if it's the latter, does that not also mean they have to go through the legal process of official name-change to reflect the new hyphenated surname?
And if this is the case, the excuse that it is too complicated undergoing a process of name change to that of the husband is still redundant, because it's the same complicated process they have to go through when adopting the hyphenated surname to affect all documents.

This whole ruckus is not even realistic, just some anonymous internet hullabaloo.

LOL..women never knowing what they want since the time of Eve

@freshdude2

It takes two to make it work. There's someone for everyone. There's someone who shares similar views with me. Thanks for the advice, 'uncle freshdude'.

This shouldnt be a big deal....... My wife mentioned it before we got married, i simply said whatever rocks your boat

There are other pressing issues to worry about!

crackhaus:
the excuse that it is too complicated undergoing a process of name change to that of the husband is still redundant, because it's the same complicated process they have to go through when adopting the hyphenated surname to affect all documents.

I doubt you'll get a sensible response but, fingers crossed.

pickabeau1:


Let me know on that day
I will also deactivate mine

Too many contradictions.. Na God go helep us

Permit me to chip this in. There are too many contradictions because there are a lot of females. You don't expect us to view life through the same glass, do you?

Chiamaka01:
Bearing one's husband's name has no point.

My dear it does.
I'm not saying it is a must but we should always remember that tried and true traditions exist for a reason, because they work, it avoids long term problems of which can be avoided if you follow them. Taking your husbands name represents the commitment between you and your husband. It means you are now a new family unit. You are starting your own family and having the same surname as your husband and children is important.

Chiamaka01:

It doesn't make her a better wife nor him a better husband.

It does in a way, When a woman agrees to take the man's name she agrees to be "husbanded" by him. That a man would get on bended knee and promise to love and cherish you forever should make you want to have his name. So if you refuse then it means you are selfish and selfish women are bad material

Chiamaka01:
It doesn't make the marriage perfect. So, if it's useless, it should be done away with.

Listen. One day, a little bird and a mighty river were having a little argument. The river bragged how big it is............ How its waves could crush the little bird. The little didn't know what to say for the river is indeed great. But something remarkable happened, the little bird jumped down from the branch of a tree, walked to the river, took a little drink, flew back to the tree and then fired back at the river. "I know that you are mighty and strong but this little drink i took has reduced your size and you no longer big as before"

Well, it sounds crazy but there is truth in it............ Even the river did not notice it but fact still remains that something has gone out of it.

You don't know the value of N10 until you want to purchase something worth N1000 and you have only N990.

Yea keeping his name or your name may not make any difference but soon, if we keep making all this unnecessary changes marriage will loose it's taste and no one will wish to marry again.

Chiamaka01:

Or is there any point?

Yea.... You said that taking his name make her a good wife which is true but do you think a woman who fight over worthless issues like this is worth keeping? Do you think a good wife material will go about fighting minor things as this?

freshdude2:
I doubt you'll get a sensible response but, fingers crossed.

Oh well...

Chiamaka01:


Permit me to chip this in. There are too many contradictions because there are a lot of females. You don't expect us to view life through the same glass, do you?

True but the trend is the same

I can't pinpoint the thread now but it's a very popular theme here

There is difference between kids raised singly of doubly.

Earlier u called someone a misogynist because u did not agree with his POV

@Tallesty1,
You misunderstood the topic. Let me paint a picture. If Stef John and Alex Smith decide to get married, is there anything wrong in Stef bearing Stef John-Smith? Bear in mind that the kids will bear Smith.

pickabeau1:


Earlier u called someone a misogynist because u did not agree with his POV

How many times do i have to say it? I called him a misogynist because he said, 'a woman is an extension of her husband'.

Chiamaka01:
@Tallesty1,
You misunderstood the topic. Let me paint a picture. If Stef John and Alex Smith decide to get married, is there anything wrong in Stef bearing Stef John-Smith? Bear in mind that the kids will bear Smith.

.

Read the comment that I replied.

Chiamaka01:


How many times do i have to say it? I called him a misogynist because he said, 'a woman is an extension of her husband'.

Hmm.....so because he did not agree with u...


Do you know what misogynist means

noun
1.
a person who hates, dislikes, mistrusts, or mistreats women.

[quote
author=ElFenomeno1 post=27219791]This shouldnt be a big deal....... [/quote]

I wonder why it should.