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Adjusting To Life As A Widower - Family (25) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Adjusting To Life As A Widower (124866 Views)

Poll: How has this thread helped you to appreciate your spouse better and positively affect your relationship?

Very Positive: 90% (9 votes)
Good: 0% (0 votes)
Fair: 10% (1 vote)
Not Really: 0% (0 votes)
Not At All: 0% (0 votes)
This poll has ended

Man Bounces Back To Life After Three Days In Morgue (Photo) / Getting Married To A Widower / Adjusting To Parenthood (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by oluite(f): 7:06am On Jan 10, 2013
Happy New Year Serubawon and Olori
Happy New Year to all the beautiful people on this thread.
@ Winniegirl
Just wanted to say praise helps me when am numb.I may not be connecting in the intial stage of the praise worship but before you know it you it all the emotions come back and you are crying and then peace.Nothing like praise and worship to God. Hope this helps.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 10:43am On Jan 10, 2013
oluite: Happy New Year Serubawon and Olori
Happy New Year to all the beautiful people on this thread.

@oluite. Happy new year to you too. Hope you have a great year.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by nemesis(f): 5:57pm On Jan 16, 2013
@Serubawon. Am so sure dat all of us wnt to know if it is finaly happnin between u & olori dis year. Hw far naa?
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 7:15pm On Jan 16, 2013
It is happening. . . . he is fully taken cool
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 7:45pm On Jan 16, 2013
chaircover: It is happening. . . . he is fully taken cool

@nemesis. Just like CC said, I'm off the market permanently o. Olori don win. Taking things one day at a time. No rush whatsoever.

Madam CC, long time no hear. How you dey? grin
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 7:51pm On Jan 16, 2013
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 10:05pm On Jan 16, 2013
chaircover: I dey oooo! Happy New Year to you and yours

Still cant decide whether to wear blue gele or gold gele to the wedding wink grin

Blue, gold, pink, whatever. We men are color blind when it comes to stuff like that anyway. As long as the ceremony is over with, bills paid and EVERYONE GOES HOME. Then I'm happy. wink
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 6:47am On Jan 17, 2013
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 9:00am On Jan 17, 2013
chaircover:

LOL when my sister was about to get married. I was asking him how the preparations were going. He jokingly said to me, that all he is asking for is that we tell him the venue and the time and he and his bestman will be there grin grin

Lol. That's a guy who him and I think alike.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by biolabee(m): 5:13pm On Jan 18, 2013
zowee...... I read the 24 pages like phew....

@Serubawon I doff my hat and dont know if I can do what you did if God forbid I found myself in your shoes
The pureness of your heart being bared and how God has healed your pain with a dear friend and wife is touching

I hope your children appreciate what you went through for them

The story of the lady that asked where your kids will stay will always crack me up

i know someone who tried a blended marriage but the woman seemed too immature and now the sub families that were really getting bonded at first are just where they are
The tightness has gone. I wish you all the best in your union and that God will grant your wife the spirit of tolerance.
if she can understand that she just has few years (4 years of high school for your baby girl + another 4 of college so tops 10 years ) and she owns you. She will have the best of marriage because you are a man I would love to emulate.

@Pritti glad to know it all came in for you

@ed The one that brought this child will be faithful to establish her in the land
She will declare the glory of God in your lives

@analytical, your analytics too gbasky

@spoilt, jenny, cc and others too numerous that helped support seru
You guys too will not lack friends in time of need

8 Years No easy sha... I no know if i fit cope
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 2:32am On Jan 19, 2013
biolabee: zowee...... I read the 24 pages like phew....

@Serubawon I doff my hat and dont know if I can do what you did if God forbid I found myself in your shoes
The pureness of your heart being bared and how God has healed your pain with a dear friend and wife is touching

I hope your children appreciate what you went through for them

The story of the lady that asked where your kids will stay will always crack me up

i know someone who tried a blended marriage but the woman seemed too immature and now the sub families that were really getting bonded at first are just where they are
The tightness has gone. I wish you all the best in your union and that God will grant your wife the spirit of tolerance.
if she can understand that she just has few years (4 years of high school for your baby girl + another 4 of college so tops 10 years ) and she owns you. She will have the best of marriage because you are a man I would love to emulate.

@Pritti glad to know it all came in for you

@ed The one that brought this child will be faithful to establish her in the land
She will declare the glory of God in your lives

@analytical, your analytics too gbasky

@spoilt, jenny, cc and others too numerous that helped support seru
You guys too will not lack friends in time of need

8 Years No easy sha... I no know if i fit cope

Thank you for the encouragement and vote of confidence. You make it sound like I'm a star or something. If not for God's grace, where would I be. This story would have been completely different. If this story is a source of inspiration for anyone, then let God take all the glory for it, for He alone gave me the grace to weather the storm.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by biolabee(m): 2:37am On Jan 19, 2013
&^^^^^^^^ Nice guy

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Analytical(m): 1:46pm On Jan 19, 2013
Very nice guy I tell you!

@biolabee, thanks for the thumbs up!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 10:18pm On Jan 20, 2013
Did I hear Aso-ebi things


Noooo talk of dat one if I neva land oh.

For all my years of not being an aso-ebi fan, this one I dey front of queue.

I don already pick my own colour sef, burnt orange and aqua marine (oh jigbijigbi)

Happy new year Oloriseru

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Joy4mi(f): 11:14pm On Jan 20, 2013
Started reading dis thread and i just want to say u av touched my life in so many ways.i am married but my husband and myself ar going thru tough times both financially nd emotionally.i was always depressed to d point of avin a high bp but dis yr i am determined to pray for myself nd my family until our miracle happens.i av learn alot frm all ur post,dose of analytical,tgirl and many more even winniegirl cos i feel like dat so many times. But i am nt givin up. I tryin to build my faith and do those things analytical advised winniegirl to do. So help me GOD. I hope to share my testimonies soon by God‘s grace.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 11:33pm On Jan 20, 2013
Joy4mi: Started reading dis thread and i just want to say u av touched my life in so many ways.i am married but my husband and myself ar going thru tough times both financially nd emotionally.i was always depressed to d point of avin a high bp but dis yr i am determined to pray for myself nd my family until our miracle happens.i av learn alot frm all ur post,dose of analytical,tgirl and many more even winniegirl cos i feel like dat so many times. But i am nt givin up. I tryin to build my faith and do those things analytical advised winniegirl to do. So help me GOD. I hope to share my testimonies soon by God‘s grace.

That's the spirit, and your joy shall be full in Jesus' name.

Just imagine coming back to tell your story and testimonies. Psalm 126:1 says ” When the Lord brought back the captivity of Zion, We were like those who dream.”

There is nothing like the joy of your captivity being turned around. You feel reborn and rejuvenated. Hang in there, your miracle is at hand.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 1:28am On Jan 21, 2013
@salsera. My sister, happy new year to you also. Don't worry. On that day, we'll just choose rainbow color aso-ebi. That should satisfy everyone, abi? grin
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 6:50am On Feb 15, 2013
It's been an immensely fulfilling day. I finally proposed (officially) to Olori with her dream ring (I hope). Even though I knew (95% sure) that she would say yes, I was still a nervous wreck anyway. It was the last thing she was expecting, so it was a truly big surprise for her. Afterwards, the smile on her face was priceless and it told me that I had made the right choice. Wishing everyone joy and happiness....now I need to get some sleep. I'm exhausted. grin wink

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Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Tgirl4real(f): 7:35am On Feb 15, 2013
Yesssss oooooo!!!

The much awaited Olori and Serubawon's wedding. grin

I hope u can now come on board my reality show. cool

Congrats dear.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Tgirl4real(f): 7:39am On Feb 15, 2013
serubawon: It's been an immensely fulfilling day. I finally proposed (officially) to Olori with her dream ring (I hope). Even though I knew (95% sure) that she would say yes, I was still a nervous wreck anyway. It was the last thing she was expecting, so it was a truly big surprise for her. Afterwards, the smile on her face was priceless and it told me that I had made the right choice. Wishing everyone joy and happiness....now I need to get some sleep. I'm exhausted. grin wink


Awww...so cute!!! Dab tears from eye. kiss
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Winneygirl(f): 10:24am On Feb 15, 2013
Joining the Aso-ebi crew....
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 10:53am On Feb 15, 2013
serubawon: It's been an immensely fulfilling day. I finally proposed (officially) to Olori with her dream ring (I hope). Even though I knew (95% sure) that she would say yes, I was still a nervous wreck anyway. It was the last thing she was expecting, so it was a truly big surprise for her. Afterwards, the smile on her face was priceless and it told me that I had made the right choice. Wishing everyone joy and happiness....now I need to get some sleep. I'm exhausted. grin wink

wink wink wink cheesy

Congrats bro . . . truly happy for you!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by biolabee(m): 12:55pm On Feb 15, 2013
Nice one congrats bros
I hope you find marital fulfillment and bliss in this union
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 3:54pm On Feb 15, 2013
@Tgirl, Winneygirl, Ujujoan & biolabee.....Thanks a lot guys. I couldn't say anything about my plans because she also reads the thread and would find out my intentions, so I kept it to myself and my 2 kids. They were cheering me all the way. She thought she was getting some fancy shoes or a dress and I kept on telling her that I wasn't releasing any info on what her valentine gift would be. The night before, she gave me a beautiful cardigan and an expensive cologne, but in all honesty, it was the valentine cards that got me. Olori is not one of those mushy emotional females and because of her past experiences, she has this very tough exterior that is almost impenetrable (except by Moi of course wink). This time, she was extremely mushy wink.

So, after building up her expectations for over a week, I bought the cheapest looking valentine teddy bear with an ugly looking card and on getting to her place yesterday, I handed these to her with a straight face. She was actually looking around for the real present, but since she didn't see anything, she accepted the ugly looking teddy bear and I could see the incredulous look on her face. She flashed a fake smile at me, gave me a hug and a kiss and thanked me for the gift. Of course, I was behaving like I just gave her a brand new car and I waited until she was sure that nothing else was forthcoming. I stepped behind her, took out the Zales ring box and waited for her to turn around. When she did, she literally froze for about 10 seconds and then screamed like she was having a baby. Then she turned away and started screaming my name and at that point, I got scared because I thought she was going to say no (I for die patapata).

So, I got on one knee (awkwardly) and proposed without actually choking or stammering like a dummy. It was kind of surprising that her hands were shaking when I was putting the ring on her finger. Let me describe the relief I had in me. You know when you need to go to the shitter REALLY BAD and you've been in traffic for like an hour? You finally get home and you start measuring the steps you need to take, going up a long flight of stairs and finally arrive at the restroom about to explode? Sometimes, you think you're not going to successfully make those last few seconds to the toilet bowl and then, (mercifully), you do make it and you finally EXPLODE. Imagine the relief you feel after the explosion: THAT'S HOW I FELT!!!!

After that experience, I was so exhausted by the time i got back home, I was literally asleep before my head hit the pillows. Woke up this morning with a dumb smile on my face. Mission accomplished!

@Tgirl4 real. Thanks for all the encouragement. She's the only person that knew my plans and was rooting for me all the way to ground zero. grin

9 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 5:03pm On Feb 15, 2013
Awwwwwwwww . . . So so sweet!
You are such a lucky man, and she a lucky woman.
Congrats again!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 5:33pm On Feb 15, 2013
serubawon:

So, after building up her expectations for over a week, I bought the cheapest looking valentine teddy bear with an ugly looking card and on getting to her place yesterday, I handed these to her with a straight face. She was actually looking around for the real present, but since she didn't see anything, she accepted the ugly looking teddy bear and I could see the incredulous look on her face. She flashed a fake smile at me, gave me a hug and a kiss and thanked me for the gift. Of course, I was behaving like I just gave her a brand new car and I waited until she was sure that nothing else was forthcoming. I stepped behind her, took out the Zales ring box and waited for her to turn around. When she did, she literally froze for about 10 seconds and then screamed like she was having a baby. Then she turned away and started screaming my name and at that point, I got scared because I thought she was going to say no (I for die patapata).

So, I got on one knee (awkwardly) and proposed without actually choking or stammering like an idiot. It was kind of surprising that her hands were shaking when I was putting the ring on her finger. Let me describe the relief I had in me. You know when you need to go to the shitter REALLY BAD and you've been in traffic for like an hour? You finally get home and you start measuring the steps you need to take, going up a long flight of stairs and finally arrive at the restroom about to explode? Sometimes, you think you're not going to successfully make those last few seconds to the toilet bowl and then, (mercifully), you do make it and you finally EXPLODE. Imagine the relief you feel after the explosion: THAT'S HOW I FELT!!!!

After that experience, I was so exhausted by the time i got back home, I was literally asleep before my head hit the pillows. Woke up this morning with a dumb smile on my face. Mission accomplished!

D

Gave me chills. Congrats!!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by SisiKill1: 5:50pm On Feb 15, 2013
Awwwwwww!! Congratulations Bros!!!

Wishing you all the love cupid has to give. . .you deserve more than that sef!!!

Here's to You and Olori!!!

We seriously need to get out own special NAIRALAND ASO EBI printed ooh!!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by queensmith: 8:46pm On Feb 15, 2013
That is just too damn romantic!
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by segun688: 2:12pm On Feb 16, 2013
am grinning like a banshee...all my 32 teeth are showing and the people around me are wondering what is wrong with me...congrats serubawon...your story is a true example of hope...for everyone....there is always light at the end of the tunnel..best of luck... smiley

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 3:05pm On Feb 16, 2013

3 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 4:30pm On Feb 16, 2013
Wow, you people are cracking me up here. grin
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Joy4mi(f): 5:45pm On Feb 16, 2013
cheesy congrats sir,i was expecting this update b4 march.now season one has ended.lets know when season2 begins (wedding,pregnancy,delivery of twins) i will be waiting.smiley

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