Herzumpther:
Alright then. I just wish her well.

The stigma of divorce fears many Nigeria ladies.

If that scare them........ Then they never loved their life and children

Because after the man must have killed them...... He would go and marry another woman

aisha2:


Wow, I feel so sad for her family
People can be deceptive. I saw their pictures they looked so happy. She made efforts and edwife was right she was unlucky and fell into the wrong hands. I apologize for blaming the victim. My condolences to the family and may he face justice

Kudos!

dre11:


If that scare them........ Then they never loved their life and children

Because after the man must have killed them...... He would go and marry another woman

True.

Men n beat,wat pains me is most of dis barbaric guys can't fight deir age grade

bukatyne:
And What are we supposed to do?

She made her bed and has lain on it.

At least, she died a Mrs.

Next

I may be wrong but you sound like a very rude person. And is being married such a big achievement that you are saying "atleast, she died a Mrs". Which is better, her being single & alive or being married and dead?. Its cos you are not a victim that's why you don't respect the dead. You should be grateful for your own cos this story could have been you so learn to mourn with those who mourn irrespective of the situation. Bless your heart.

boluyongp:


I may be wrong but you sound like a very rude person. And is being married such a big achievement that you are saying "atleast, she died a Mrs". Which is better, her being single & alive or being married and dead?. Its cos you are not a victim that's why you don't respect the dead. You should be grateful for your own cos this story could have been you so learn to mourn with those who mourn irrespective of the situation. Bless your heart.

Your opinion

Thanks and goodnight

[size=14pt]Thank God my religion support divorce.

RIP Pretty lady.

Ladies dating bad, though rich guys Una see the result. [/size]

It is sad to hear such unsavoury news. A lady of 30years being battered to d point of her being dead in the process. What a wicked world we are in. Rest in Peace. However, dis should serve as a lesson to other ladies esp those gunning for Yahoo boys. For the fact that a guy is yahoo is enough for him not to worth your love. If someone can have the heart to swindle another, it clearly shows the guy is heartless let alone a lady agreeing to marry. Nothing like if a man knows that u love him for what he is and not what he has. Ladies be careful and pipe low. Nothing is wrong with marrying a rich or abroad guy but it shouldn't be a yardstick of marrying. Rest in Peace.

Nawa o, just 2 yrs of marriage, while our great grand fathers n grand fathers married up to 3 or more wives and dey lived in peace without any prblm.

oc2fish:
I refused to believe that the guy suddenly changed from a loving husband to a beater; why in Malaysia we have girls but no wife, hr is bold and decent enough to bring wife so I doubt the story of the loving guy beating the wife. The guy might fall out of luck in making money and the girl either increase nagging or threatening to become a 'RUNS GIRL'

Folks living in a foreign land like Malaysia put a lot of pressure on boys to pay bills 45 -60k per month feeding for two 100k per month. With regular taxi fare of 2 to 7k pet trip.

Not forgetting 600k and above required to renew stay if person is not an M.Sc or PhD student. All this put a lot of pressure on guys which can make them to become unnecessarily aggressive.

Rip to the dead.

Self preservation is the first law of nature... RIP to the departed. Nobody deserves to die that way.

The guy is supposed to be jailed for life

bellong:


You don't marry someone with the hope that s/he may change for good. One of the mistakes singles make.

Seeing an abuser yet you insist on marrying him/her because Robber Kayode Williams may become an Evangelist tomorrow, my brother, it is a great gamble. Well, change is the constant in life. An example is the victim's husband who changed from an abuser to a murderer.

You seem not to understand me.... I never said anything like marrying someone hoping they will change for good.... Rather I said you might marry someone you feel is an angel who turns out to be a demon, a sheep in a wolf clothing

well you are very correct ..but my question is that can an angel really hide some character...expect you just met the persons for few weeks and get married ..am i making some sense?

Frankiss44:


You seem not to understand me.... I never said anything like marrying someone hoping they will change for good.... Rather I said you might marry someone you feel is an angel who turns out to be a demon, a sheep in a wolf clothing

Well, I understand you. However, if one pays detailed attention to what matters, a wolf can't hide for too long in a sheep clothing.

Not saying some can't be unlucky but there is always a way out before it leads to death.

I do not have all the details about this case but I know, she could have avoided an untimely death.

*sigh*

The mind boggles...

I can't imagine myself in this kind of situation. Even if I don't tell my mum about being abused, the God she serves will reveal all to her and all hell will break loose... Woe betides the man who will violently abuse my mother's child.

*sigh*

Marraige marraige marraige.

*sigh*

The mind truly boggles. How can any one withstand domestic violence? I just don't understand. You sit down while a man wastes your destiny? On top what? Marriage??!

I just don't understand.

cococandy:

Seriously. Only when the victim is dead do our people see the fault in her having stayed in the union.

While she's still alive anyone who advices her to leave is an evil divorce advocate.

You are very correct. But as a woman, I advice people never to condone even a slap. It starts from there. Once a man slaps you, don't try fighting or holding his clothes. Just calm down and plan your probable exit.

I will keep saying it o,anyone who dies in a marriage of abuse, has only but themselves to blame,feck society and what it thinks, will society sue you for deciding to leave an abusive partner? Abegi.

So sad. Ladies shd learn frm this.

Source : ARTICLE | 14 MARCH 2012 - 11:45AM | BY LEONIE TAYLOR

Between half and two thirds of Nigerian women are subject to domestic violence in their homes. Domestic violence affects all social groups and can consist of physical, sexual and psychological abuse. Although men can also be affected by domestic violence, women suffer disproportionately.
This trend occurs across much of the world, but Nigeria’s discriminatory laws and dismissive police compound its particularly high rates of domestic violence. Most potently, its prevalent culture of silence and stigma for the victims of domestic violence hinders public acknowledgement of the problem. There exists an urgent need to challenge the social prejudices and institutional structures in order to protect its women, not just from danger, but also from ridicule, fear and isolation.

Stephane Mikala, Deputy Director of Amnesty International’s Africa program, said :
"On a daily basis, Nigerian women are beaten, raped and even murdered by members of their family for supposed transgressions, which can range from not having meals ready on time to visiting family members without their husband’s permission," adding that "husbands, partners and fathers are responsible for most of the violence".

Although more widespread in South Asia, acid attacks on women which cause extreme pain, disfigurement and can be fatal, have also been on the rise in Nigeria, and have failed to be taken seriously as an offence by the Nigerian authorities.

What is happening and why?
A combination of factors contributes to the high rates of domestic violence in Nigeria. In general, domestic violence is seen as a 'private' matter to be dealt with by the family, typically a domain of male authority. Nigerian women are expected to behave with subservience to their husbands, and domestic violence is often accepted as a part of marriage. According to Amnesty International, many believe that a woman is "expected to endure whatever she meets in her matrimonial home", and to provide “sex and obedience” to her husband, who has the right to violate and batter her if she fails to meet her marital duties. For some victims, domestic violence is seen as a sign of love. Domestic violence in Nigeria is often viewed as a necessary corrective tool for women, at best a part and parcel of married life.

Two key factors help to perpetuate domestic violence. The first is the inability of many women to escape violence and domination due to their disadvantaged economic status. Many women and girls depend on the financial resources of their husband, father or families. This forces them to put up with domination for fear of the withdrawal of this financial support. In Nigeria, female adult literacy is below the national average at 54.6% and the number of women below the poverty line is 65% compared to that of men at 35%. Yet even for educated women, domestic violence poses a serious threat to their safety and wellbeing. According to a recent study by the Global Press Institute, 65% of educated women have been beaten by their husband or boyfriend.

A second crucial factor is a culture of silence that stigmatises the victims of domestic violence rather than the perpetrators. Funmi Tejuoso of the Lagos State House of Assembly claims that women were told to "go home and be a good wife" when they brought complaints to the police, making women fear the label of being a "bad wife". This reinforces the need for raising awareness about women's political rights and to educate women that they are not to blame for the physical, sexual or psychological abuse to which they are subjected.

Lack of institutional support

Many Nigerians have little faith in the integrity or capacity of the police to redress crimes of domestic abuse. This can be attributed to corruption and under-resourcing of the police as well as perceived pervasive institutional sexism. Itoro Eze-Anaba of the Legal Defence and Assistance Project (LEDAP) said , "The police and courts often dismiss domestic violence as a family matter and refuse to investigate or press charges". Like much of the world, women in Nigeria face humiliating rules regarding evidence in court when it concerns violence against them.

This results in a very low level of reporting. In 2005, only 18.1% of 10,000 women who said they had been raped went to the police. Furthermore, women who have been raped were unable to obtain medical examinations and did not know how to report rape or obtain help.

Dr Mairo Mandara, Chairperson of the Right to Information Initiative Nigeria (R2K), and Director of the charity Girl Child Concerns , spoke to Think Africa Press regarding the futility of making police complaints:

“Domestic violence is pretty common in Nigeria and rape is on the increase...Unfortunately, the police and support systems for these cases are very poor. Unless the victim is lucky to be supported by Civil Society groups, seeking redress is almost a waste of time.”

Unprotective law

Discriminatory national laws pose a serious threat to women's safety in Nigeria. The penal code in Northern states allows the correction of child, pupil, servant or wife as long as it does not amount to grievous harm (Section 55). Furthermore, marital rape is excluded from the definition of rape under state-level Sharia penal code in Northern states and under the criminal code in Southern states. Specifically, section 295 of the criminal code recognises “the resort to some degree of violence for correctional purposes”.

Nigeria is failing to implement its current obligations under international law. In early 2007, Nigeria’s National Assembly rejected the domestication of the international law of CEDAW (the Convention on the Elimination of all forms of Discrimination Against Women), despite having ratified it in the 1980s without reservation.
There are certain alternative authorities to the courts that are often consulted when settling a case of domestic violence. However, discrimination against women may continue in the consulting of community elders, and women’s version of events may be dismissed out of hand. Rape cases in particular are often settled financially out of court.


My own word is : pls leave wen U̶̲̥̅̊ ar still alive!!!

trite:


You are very correct. But as a woman, I advice people never to condone even a slap. It starts from there. Once a man slaps you, don't try fighting or holding his clothes. Just calm down and plan your probable exit.

gbam

First time slap
Second time punch
You sit and wait and pray for change, next time belt and chair and knife or whatever he can reach

Next time human being turn to corpse.

Not as if we don't have violent women though, I just wonder why it is more prevalent among the dudes. Maybe because they are physically stronger and human nature pushes some of them to take advantage of that.

O my God.she was my senior in secondary sch.rest in peace sis Ese.just can't stop crying

May we(ladies) not use our hands to sign our death certificate(s) in the name of marriage.

Uhhhmmm na wa o

Sad story. May she rest in peace but soooo many lessons to be learnt from this story.

Which kind of psychotic person locks up another human being (let's even forget wife) denies them food, contact with others?

If not that going down the insanity route might be an easy cop out for this beast (yes I used that word) I would have said any human being who does such has quite a large no of screws loose up there.

It wasn't the first beating that killed her,why are we abusing
the man?The woman committed suicide by staying put with
a violent man.Shebi she wanted to save face because they
said "marriage is for better for worse","divorce is sin","a
woman keeps a home"..They say marriage is till death do
them part so death has separated them. Not a big deal. She
killed herself.heaven will nt forgive any woman who dies as
a result of domestic violence.
I don't blame men who beat their wives.The women certainly love being beaten else they would have raised alarm,call for help and walk away.

Naija guy on transit in Malaysia = yahoo, yahoo
Naija guy studying in Malaysia = yahoo, yahoo
Naija guy doing business in Malaysia = yahoo, yahoo

Which kind of psychotic person locks up another human being (let's even forget wife) denies them food, contact with others?...

Marriage na FORCE...
IS IT COMPULSORY DAT every lady must get married..?
Is it also compulsory that every man must get married..?

Is it also COMPULSORY dat the married MUST remain married in a marriage whose foundation is laid on the devil's tomb...?

bukatyne:
And What are we supposed to do?

She made her bed and has lain on it.

At least, she died a Mrs.

Next

No single empathy even for the dead?.....smh.