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Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Nobody: 3:01pm On Oct 30, 2009
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Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by coolier(f): 3:04pm On Oct 30, 2009
shocked
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by ThoniaSlim(f): 3:06pm On Oct 30, 2009
Such people are best left to be on their own abeg!  lipsrsealed
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by agabaI23(m): 3:21pm On Oct 30, 2009
If you are married to the person

Tell him or her you want a divorce on the ground that you cannot be the  fall guy/girl that  always apologises.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by benedictac(f): 3:22pm On Oct 30, 2009
Mine was quick at saying "I'm sorry" when we were still courting but since after our wedding the case has changed, but what did i do, i just counted it as one of those things in him i can do without
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by anddrewz: 3:25pm On Oct 30, 2009
Well I am married to one of such persons who never say sorry, can you imagine in our 12 years  of marriage my wife never say sorry, because she always assume i am the one that is always at fault, even if her action brought about the problem.  And she will not mind living with me in the house like cat and dog, everyone on his own, even for one week, she will not apologize until I do the apology even if she was the one at fault just for peace to reign in the home. She has never looked for a way to resolve any misunderstanding in the relationship, it is like she enjoy it when we quarrel.

In such a case what can one do?
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by nethacker(m): 3:27pm On Oct 30, 2009
i will simply ignore just for a while after which i wil move on . simple!!!
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by agabaI23(m): 3:53pm On Oct 30, 2009
anddrewz:

Well I am married to one of such persons who never say sorry, can you imagine in our 12 years of marriage my wife never say sorry, because she always assume i am the one that is always at fault, even if her action brought about the problem. And she will not mind living with me in the house like cat and dog, everyone on his own, even for one week, she will not apologize until I do the apology even if she was the one at fault just for peace to reign in the home. She has never looked for a way to resolve any misunderstanding in the relationship, it is like she enjoy it when we quarrel.

In such a case what can one do?

Get a job in a location far away from her. Just do something that will keep you away for a while or threaten for a divorce. I am not asking you to divorce. I have a neighbour in Nigeria who was always fighting and blaming her husband. The moment the guy was transfered from Enugu to Kaduna(fed civil servant), the lady changed. The guy was my cool friend. He told me that he asked her to decide between her ego and their marriage. When i spoke with him recently he said that the lady apologises for the least things even when an apology is not needed.
Men can be like that as well. Too much ego is not good for a woman.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by hackney(m): 3:53pm On Oct 30, 2009
Heart of stone woman.
Better run while you can.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Esoheolotu(f): 4:02pm On Oct 30, 2009
Its difficult but we do many things for love. This is just one of the many.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by IbrahimB: 4:26pm On Oct 30, 2009
It's the number 1 thing that destroys a marriage - the inability to admit mistakes and take corrections. It's plain immaturity. It's an attitude that completely overshadows whatever other good quality the person has. If the problem persists, better go your separate ways because greater heart-aches await you in future.

1 Like

Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by jilbaby: 4:38pm On Oct 30, 2009
My hubby is like dat too. He always has a reason for everything he does and will never admit being at fault. Sometimes i get so pissed, i'll refuse to talk to him and when that happens, he always look for ways to get me to talk to him but he'll never say he is sorry.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by nwabuking5(m): 4:49pm On Oct 30, 2009
if u have any woman who don't say sorry when she do a wrong thing please for the sake of ur life run away. because that type of woman can kill a man. because any woman that have that kind of heart is very wicked and she can do anything. for the man. a man should say sorry to his partner when ever he did a wrong thing but u know some times there is a kind of pride in some men that they may not tell u sorry instantly but they will say sorry after some time.  But there is some thing a woman should not do because she see her man doing it. because sometimes it may bring more problem to the relationship.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Joe50(m): 6:53pm On Oct 30, 2009
If its a friendship i'll quit, but if already marriage, i'll keep on advising her praying to God to change her.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Rooneyboy(m): 6:53pm On Oct 30, 2009
Mine was once like that but i made her understand that it was bad when i treated her SAME WAY . She cried her eyes off and i didnt even bother to pat her, rather i went out to drink beer with the boyz.

1 Like

Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by chic2pimp(m): 6:58pm On Oct 30, 2009
Rooneyboy:

Mine was once like that but i made her understand that it was bad when i treated her SAME WAY . She cried her eyes off and i didnt even bother to pat her, rather i went out to drink beer with the boyz.
Chei una nairalanders wicked ooo cheesy cheesy grin grin grin
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by denony(m): 7:08pm On Oct 30, 2009
whenever he/she does something wrong shocked
just look at her and said "I know u want me to say sorry, ok ur sorry" grin
i bet he/she will say am sorry too baby, i dont mean to hurt u kiss

I know how to handle them grin
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by LordReed(m): 7:12pm On Oct 30, 2009
Some pretty harsh responses out there. For me it's hard to ignore the one I love simply cos she doesn't say sorry n I couldn't bring myself to revenge the action so I guess it'll just be a case of learning to live with it.

denony:

whenever he/she does something wrong shocked
just look at her and said "I know u want me to say sorry, ok your sorry" grin
i bet he/she will say am sorry too baby, i dont mean to hurt u kiss

I know how to handle them grin

Nice Humour, I should try that.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Nobody: 7:50pm On Oct 30, 2009
inability to say sorry is a danger signal in relatioships. if you are not married yet, you have two choices: to stay or to leave. if you decide to leave , remember that there's always someone better out there
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by youngdee(m): 9:32pm On Oct 30, 2009
You try talking to the person, if he/she continues, just please ignore him/her cos it really hurts someone when you are expecting sorry from someone but got nothing
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by smurf1(f): 9:51pm On Oct 30, 2009
VALENCI:

inability to say sorry is a danger signal in relatioships. if you are not married yet, you have two choices: to stay or to leave. if you decide to leave , remember that there's always someone better out there

yup
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Nobody: 10:01pm On Oct 30, 2009
youngdee:

You try talking to the person, if he/she continues, just please ignore him/her cos it really hurts someone when you are expecting sorry from someone but got nothing

true
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by TheSeeker(m): 10:59pm On Oct 30, 2009
anddrewz:

Well I am married to one of such persons who never say sorry, can you imagine in our 12 years  of marriage my wife never say sorry, because she always assume i am the one that is always at fault, even if her action brought about the problem.  And she will not mind living with me in the house like cat and dog, everyone on his own, even for one week, she will not apologize until I do the apology even if she was the one at fault just for peace to reign in the home. She has never looked for a way to resolve any misunderstanding in the relationship, it is like she enjoy it when we quarrel.

In such a case what can one do?
One important thing you have to note in every relationship and/or marriage is that you will at some point, have disagreements - some mild, some vehement - but getting past it is what matters, and just how are you going to be able to achieve a peaceful relationship when your partner claims to be holistic and never at fault? For me, I don't think that's possible. A woman's supposed to be apologetic, so is a man, as long as you've done something wrong or been an accomplice to something that went wrong. Undoubtedly, you can apologize even if you're not at fault (I have seen women who do this), so putting up with a woman who always believes she's right when she's on the wrong is the wrongest and the most pathetic relationship you can ever be in.

When fracas breaks in, someone has to be responsible and putting off the blame off you and heaping it on me will just so not work for us because I'm leaving immediately. Not that apology really means a lot that much but as I see it, every motive towards an action counts. For instance, if you tell me sorry for the sake of just telling me and not that it comes from your heart, I will not consider it an apology but a scorn. It's got to be heartfelt. I think you need to sit your wife down and talk to her. Let her understand what it is all about and express your displeasure - and you have to note that there's a huge gap of differential traits between a stubborn and egocentric woman and a determined woman.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by BIKINI(f): 11:02pm On Oct 30, 2009
Try d an eye 4 an eye. . . approach. Do me i do u back, no 1 apologizes 2 no 1, God no go vex, & evry1's happy
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by N101: 11:23pm On Oct 30, 2009
Those people who are saying "walk" have either never been married nor in a long term relationship.  Most people wouldn't/cannot just "walk" from a marriage when they have physically and emotionally invested so much into it. 

Years ago I used to hear people saying: "if you can't hear you must feel".  So in this case, if a spouse refuses to say sorry, I would wait because I know a time will come when they will make a serious error and I won't be there to pick up the pieces.  When it all starts falling apart and they start looking for someone to blame rather than to take responsibility, I will do like my friend Rooneyboy and go about my business and let them suffer alone.

So long as I wasn't implicated and they messed things up for themselves, not my problem.  It's all fine and good to pray for people, often their pride and arrogance is a stumbling block, and that is really what stops people from apologising when they've done something wrong.  I'm not one for revenge but in this case they will have to learn the hard way.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by youngdee(m): 11:29pm On Oct 30, 2009
Hey smurf, ya look gud in dat pic,
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by chelseabmw(m): 12:48am On Oct 31, 2009
just passing
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by TheSeeker(m): 1:28am On Oct 31, 2009
N101:

Those people who are saying "walk" have either never been married nor in a long term relationship.  Most people wouldn't/cannot just "walk" from a marriage when they have physically and emotionally invested so much into it. 

Years ago I used to hear people saying: "if you can't hear you must feel".  So in this case, if a spouse refuses to say sorry, I would wait because I know a time will come when they will make a serious error and I won't be there to pick up the pieces.  When it all starts falling apart and they start looking for someone to blame rather than to take responsibility, I will do like my friend Rooneyboy and go about my business and let them suffer alone.

So long as I wasn't implicated and they messed things up for themselves, not my problem.  It's all fine and good to pray for people, often their pride and arrogance is a stumbling block, and that is really what stops people from apologising when they've done something wrong.  I'm not one for revenge but in this case they will have to learn the hard way.
A marriage where you've invested physically and emotionally is only expected to be fair, if not best to your taste. When something goes wrong in a marriage, it's supposed to be worked out or it'll break the marriage - although you may not realize it immediately but these things degenerate to crackdown marriages.

Your partner not ready to take responsibilities for whatever he/she does speaks ill of them. It shows lack of respect for your own emotions; depicts excessive and haughty pride; a quarrelsome creature, and lots more. If you're in a marriage and you choose to put some things 'behind' you - issues that requires address - then your marriage is heading for a doom because a time will come when you will have it up to here.

A marriage where you have the mind to take revenge is a healthy marriage? A marriage you put up so much effort into will be a kind where you're promoting internal and in-built differences? Where is the understanding? Where's the openness? Where's the respect for each other's opinion? Where's the honesty? If taking revenge later is what marriage is all about then I'd just be a love-vendor rather than be a husband.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by sley4life(m): 4:50am On Oct 31, 2009
i pray for them 2 change.I know of 1 who nv apologise
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Nobody: 5:12am On Oct 31, 2009
I will definitely dump her ass along the way, i can never tolerate.
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by Pweety4me(f): 6:50am On Oct 31, 2009
@Poster communication!
Re: Dealing With A Partner Who Never Says Sorry by layzie: 10:33am On Oct 31, 2009
@
Where is the understanding? Where's the openness? Where's the respect for each other's opinion? Where's the honesty? If taking revenge later is what marriage is all about then I'd just be a love-vendor rather than be a husband.

grammar

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