funmisticqueen:
There is this friend of mine, she's still a student, she has a steady boyfriend whom she loves but is broke, but there has been this persistent toaster on her case who is financially buoyant. My friend has not had a laptop and phone for quite a while cos hers was stolen a while ago, and these things are necessary to read with in her school. Her parents said they weren't getting any gadgets for her again cos the last laptop they bought was also stolen when raiders came to the reading rooms in her school. Her parents are also against her doing business in school as they think it would disrupt her studies?p.
She told this her steady boyfriend that she needs a phone and not an expensive one, i think she asked for a techno about five months ago, but her boyfriend kept telling her he would get with no show, he didn't give her a gift on valentine even though she got him one cos he forgot and didn't have money.
A month ago, her boyfriend moved to a new apartment. She feels he should be settled first before she reminds him about the phone.

Yesterday, she called me and told me that the persistent toaster just got her a phone. She doesn't know what type but he said he noticed she didnt have a phone and she wasnt on whatsapp. He said it was a gift for her with no strings attached.
Our question is this, should she collect the phone, even though she doesnt really like the guy? If she does and her boyfriend sees it should she say she got it from another guy? Wont it lead to issues in their relationship?
Would really appreciate your wise and helpful comments? No insults please?

I advice she shouldn't collect the phone on the pretence that she's going to think about his proposal. she should tell the guy she's already in a serious relationship and not ready to let go. If he doesn't mind then, let her collect the phone it's his choice.

And she shouldn't hesitate to tell her boyfriend how the phone came to be, if there's trust, he wouldn't mind much.

repogirl:
Let her do what her mind tells her to do. Is the boyfriend engaged to her that she is carrying him on top her head like gele? Its not even his place to get her a phone, but since he promised and cant fulfil it, she can take from the one who is offering. Shebi he said no strings attached.
If he now wants to attach the strings, she can return his phone to him.

Then again she can save up for her phone. These days a good phone can do most of the work that a PC does. In my time, there was a way I used to hike the prices of things and make up bogus fees to pay, to get extra money , lol. (No be me send you o ).

Finally, She is still in school ..boys are not her priority. SHE should be her own priority. All this skool boyfriend tinz sef.

But isnt it funny that she is more concerned about what her boyfriend would think and not what her parents would think when she gets a phone they didnt buy for her?

your brain is working jare

TheLordIsGr8:


Better to worry her parents and not some man who is hustling to make it in life.
She could be gone in a minute if a man with means comes around. Unless of course she's ready to go the whole 9 yards and give s*x for phone.

nuf said.

The man isn't demanding anything in return for the gift, is he? The fact she is tithering on to accept or not says a lot 'bout how she respects her relationship.

awonwerey:
Anybody who boils hot water should be ready to do EBA


Once she don collect the gadget, she should be ready to drop pant or get married to the dude

Over and out

Plain and simple.

Ya'll talking like you don't know what's really going on, she's considering the gifts and all from the so called suitor cos she's probably thinking what if she doesn't end up with her bf, what if eventually he leaves her then she'd have lost the opportunity owning quite a big phone and a laptop from a suitor. The question is it worth loosing the suitors advances cos she loves her bf not her fiance or husband, her BF?!
I'd just tell you to talk to him your bf first before you do anything, communication is key in a relationship

2dugged:
I don't get,which one are you guilty of?, the broken dude or the rich guy using money to collect people's gfs?

most broke guys only see their current gfs as making do with what is available, when they blow that is when they will know they prefer light skinned

When I was a student I dated girls I know I can't marry cuz I haven't built d value I needed to get d ones I ll want to take to mama.... Now that I have built d needed value... D standard is high... First she must be financially independent, an asset to my future not a liability and beautiful

I hope that my mumu so called girlfriend read this thread...may she go wise up through people comment, I have been in similar situation, but I later doubled my hustle and glory be to God my Case is different today, I didn't respect her an inch but we still dey manage the relationship.

a phone is a necessity...and I don't see how a parent will not want to get his kid a phone

how will they communicate?


i think this girl in question is greedy and loves flashy things....the boyfriend in question should break up my with her to avoid stories that melt the heart

guys if u dont have money, your girlfriend will leave u for a money man. these girls aren't financially ok and will jump at any opportunity to be assisted financially. this leaves a room for ur gf to be hijacked so to speak by another man

mykel25:


most broke guys only see their current gfs as making do with what is available, when they blow that is when they will know they prefer light skinned

When I was a student I dated girls I know I can't marry cuz I haven't built d value I needed to get d ones I ll want to take to mama.... Now that I have built d needed value... D standard is high... First she must be financially independent, an asset to my future not a liability and beautiful

you see,this is why I will not blame her if she accepts the phone, I had a nasty experience, so it will be better she knows where she stands with her bf before turning the toaster down,else it might turn out her bf was not even worth it in the first place, this I can boldly say from experience. Infact she might end up turning good men down and waste a good time of her prime and that her bf ends up messing her up,such school relationships have the tendency to end at "main gate" like uniben students will say

mapet:

Are you sure that even the phantom friend exist?

of course not. she thinks she is smart.

dominique:
Start dating a Nigerian girl and you automatically start owing her money. Truer words have not been spoken about this generation of Nigerian girls. Babes, stop making yourselves liabilities to men. It's annoying. You have two hands, two legs and a brain just like your boyfriends, stop making yourselves their responsibility. Nothing wrong with gifts every now and then but expecting them to fund your lifestyle? NO NO NO!!!! I will warn my son about girls like these when he gets of age. He ain't gonna be responsible for any greedy girl's expenses, he is not her father.
Tell your friend to save up her pocket money and get herself a phone. That was exactly what I did when my phone got stolen when I was in 200 level. I literally starved myself, saved up my small change, my big sis added a little to it and I got myself a Nokia 2700 radio phone. I just can't imagine asking a guy for money or phone. It's just so absurd.

These are the kind of ladies we want in Nigeria.

i can't just understand nigerian girls,they all want to depend on there man.how many gift has she given to the guy.on val she can still buy gift for the guy.nawao

2dugged:
you see,this is why I will not blame her if she accepts the phone, I had a nasty experience, so it will be better she knows where she stands with her bf before turning the toaster down,else it might turn out her bf was not even worth it in the first place, this I can boldly say from experience. Infact she might end up turning good men down and waste a good time of her prime and that her bf ends up messing her up,such school relationships have the tendency to end at "main gate" like uniben students will say

.

So far no ring on that finger yet.... My dear he has not decided deeply within himself to marry you


Yes ure right... I guess d lady has so much years b4 marriage... She ll c things and her taste ll surely change.... It a normal thing.... Citing experience.... At Diz point of my life I don't even ask a girl I know she's not desperate for a serious relationship out.... Only at that point that she knows what she want... And if she say yes that's means she wants u... Ure okay to be a husband.... I don't date school gehs either cuz I know when she's ready.... She myt want higher taste.... So OP friend shd look keenly into d matter and go for what makes her happy.... Buh one thing is certain both guys can't marry her..... Enjoy your emotional excapades yl it last buh don't become a hoe for every Divk that's d most important thing

dominique:
Start dating a Nigerian girl and you automatically start owing her money. Truer words have not been spoken about this generation of Nigerian girls. Babes, stop making yourselves liabilities to men. It's annoying. You have two hands, two legs and a brain just like your boyfriends, stop making yourselves their responsibility. Nothing wrong with gifts every now and then but expecting them to fund your lifestyle? NO NO NO!!!! I will warn my son about girls like these when he gets of age. He ain't gonna be responsible for any greedy girl's expenses, he is not her father.

Tell your friend to save up her pocket money and get herself a phone. That was exactly what I did when my phone got stolen when I was in 200 level. I literally starved myself, saved up my small change, my big sis added a little to it and I got myself a Nokia 2700 radio phone. I just can't imagine asking a guy for money or phone. It's just so absurd.

It's in you

Keep it up

Unfortunately, most girls have this sheep/herd mentality which makes them want to conform just to be like others girls.

So if a girl has a clique of friends who believe men should pay for every one of their needs, she'll just go with the flow

It only takes experience to reset her brain

We are just wasting our time talking too much. We know our naija babes. The babe has already received the phone and the Rich guy has already smashed the kpekus

What is offered for free comes with a psychological price tag — complicated feelings of obligation.

There is an old trick of "giving when you are about to take. " By giving the appropriate gift, you put the recipient under obligation.

Generosity softens people up— to be deceived. Free things are dangerous — it usually comes with a hidden obligation.

If you take that gift you will definitely cheat on your boyfriend. It is certain.

Raine80:
She loves her boyfriend but she loves nice things more. It's clear to see who is going to be the focus of her attention and it's not her soon to be ex-boyfriend.

Sabrina ?

funmisticqueen:
There is this friend of mine, she's still a student, she has a steady boyfriend whom she loves but is broke, but there has been this persistent toaster on her case who is financially buoyant. My friend has not had a laptop and phone for quite a while cos hers was stolen a while ago, and these things are necessary to read with in her school. Her parents said they weren't getting any gadgets for her again cos the last laptop they bought was also stolen when raiders came to the reading rooms in her school. Her parents are also against her doing business in school as they think it would disrupt her studies?p.
She told this her steady boyfriend that she needs a phone and not an expensive one, i think she asked for a techno about five months ago, but her boyfriend kept telling her he would get with no show, he didn't give her a gift on valentine even though she got him one cos he forgot and didn't have money.
A month ago, her boyfriend moved to a new apartment. She feels he should be settled first before she reminds him about the phone.

Yesterday, she called me and told me that the persistent toaster just got her a phone. She doesn't know what type but he said he noticed she didnt have a phone and she wasnt on whatsapp. He said it was a gift for her with no strings attached.
Our question is this, should she collect the phone, even though she doesnt really like the guy? If she does and her boyfriend sees it should she say she got it from another guy? Wont it lead to issues in their relationship?
Would really appreciate your wise and helpful comments? No insults please?

Talk if this na you

BTW, which phone did she call you with?

Na this kind Gal dey persuade her husband Frnds/Ogas to buy her Laptop, phone etc.
In she wil pay in kind

Dont forget to finally tell us when she collects the gift.

Nonsense, is your Boyfriend your husband or parents? is it a must to buy u a phone? your parents cannot buy u a phone but it's now a crime that your guy couldn't buy u a phone. I only pity guys who fools around in d name of love. No woman loves a man sef. it's all about what she will gain from him. anyway, u can do whatever you wanna do with your phone simply because only u knows what you actually want...

Stop telling lies. U are the broke boyfriend.....

the way the op is tagging a guy as "broke" ain't cool at all, truth be told the girl is broke even her parents are broke.

is it compulsory for a guy to buy gifts on valentines day? Ok he didn't buy for her so what did she give him?

relationship is all about sharing and sacrifices

a parent or guardian knows the value of a pc when it comes to studies and appreciate any other thing that would make their ward less vulnerable to vices, what's is the point of dating a fellow student when you know you ve big eyes for other stuff, am still saying it, maybe her parents are broke and can't afford the luxury of purchasing another pc and phone.

later we will hear that all the guy want is s*x. accept the gift and when the new one is broke please move on to the next available buoyant guy

This is why Girls will end up with broken homes and marriages the boyfriend is not broke he's a work in progress,
if u knew the rich guy when he was a work in progress I'm sure you wouldn't date him.
Try to be committed in everything you do. In the university you dont say because your friend's course is easier than yours so you leave yours. People are not commited at all and commitment is one of the strong foundations of a good long lasting relationship. Forget gifts and all other material things you might be longing for, those things fade away. Be committed.

hope this is not u, that you saying your frienf

Advice your friend to leave the broke guy, he is nice now cos he is broke, once he has money now, he will either turn her into a punching bag or marry another person. She should go for a guy that is already established. Nigerian men are not keepers I tell you. They are all cheats and abusers.

It's always My girlfriend's boyfriend, not My boyfriend. Girls always finding a convenient way to put their life stories on the internet and avoid bashing and shaming

DeRay98:


Solid advice from a lady who has a sound mind, a pretty look and brains.
This combination is what a call a "beauty".
But wait oh, this your long refined "dada" no dey heavy you?

lol, trust me, you have no idea...

in my own language"agam abu ogbenye buru amunsu" if I can't get phone for you as .y girlfriend and a bross is offering to help,my dear,grab it with two hands.it's a test of love,if you decide to follow bross because he got you phone,then you're not mine.bye bye

Girls are wayward by default,the one when dey form faithful never jam wetin go make her off piant yet,me I don already swear for my life say I no go marry when time reach me na to get baby mama ...Gbam

Izen:


Your number 4. If she isn't a priority in his life, then he should let her be. Its not by force to have a girlfriend. I cannot date you and you won't be a priority in my life. What are we now doing?

Before you belch, read his statement again:

Or did she now decided that her financial problems are "solely" bf issues?

and take note of the highlighted word "solely".
If you, as a girl, believe that all your problems should become your boyfriend's responsibility then you're nothing but broke ass gold-digging loser!