evexx1:


I already have a big reason to reject you, it is either your english is poor or you simply cannot type correctly.

It is a huge turn off for me. Enjoy

connectpoint:


Buhari...

Great..how about the dad shopping for an in-law for his daughter...yu got won over

RaggedyAnn:



We are not talking about peanuts. We are referring to women who are intelligent, ambitious, hardworking, and driven; who have found success in their chosen fields; success that has reflected well on their bank accounts as well. It's only natural that they would want to be associated with equally driven people. Not for the wealth directly but for the character that built it. It's common sense. Even in platonic cases, guys who are go-getters don't typically hob-nob with the under-achievers from their past. Imagine chaining yourself to one for life!


When a woman is desperate to get married she can make whatever concessions she chooses. And if she finds that she cannot live with someone who does not challenge her intellectually and whose lack of motivation and energy level prove counter-productive to her own personal force, she can decide to stay single if it would make her happier. She can look after herself.

A man as rich as Mike Adenuga can marry a penniless village girl, yes. And that penniless village girl would humble herself and say "yes, sir" and do his bidding. Or else she would find herself out on the street. If a woman as rich as Adenuga married a penniless village boy, he would feel he owned her because he has a dick. She would have to cater to his pride (because only men are entitled to pride) and make herself less visible, less powerful, less everything, in order to accommodate his underachievement. So you should appreciate why a woman would want a man who at least matches her evenly.

RaggedyAnn:



I used Mike Adenuga because that's the example used by the person I quoted. (Was it you?). I don't know how you qualify intelligence. It is not the ability to speak good English or hold a conversation in politics or whatever. It's a capacity for aptitude. And a person who is successful at something must have mastered something to an excellent level. That shows intelligence.

I equate financial reward to successful enterprise. And successful enterprise is dependent on several variables (diligence, discipline, drive, etc) including intelligence.

But like I said in my earlier post (was it to you?) some people get rich by dubious means and that's not the class of men I'm referring to.

evexx1:



Well best of luck then. Smh

Lubyna:
One thing I have realized from reading comments on this website is that a lot of men do not understand that some women have certain financial standards when it comes to dating, and nothing can make them lower those standards. So guys, when a lady says she can't date a broke guy, try to first ruminate on the information I want to pass across before deciding to label her with derogatory appellations.

When I say some ladies, this "some" constitutes a certain category of ladies. This category includes ladies who are ambitious, hardworking and goal oriented. They are aren't idle or ignorant. They are intelligent, well informed and most times are financially bouyant. These are the kind of women I am categorically referring to. If this kind of woman says she can't date a broke guy, then she is justified in making such statement, and any guy who insults her for making such statement or tries to refute her statement with the kind of pathetic comments I read here, is indeed pathetic.

How does anyone expect a woman who is working towards being financially successful and expending time and energy towards this goal, to settle for some guy who earns WAY less than she does? How can a financially ambitious woman lower her standards and spend years waiting for some guy "who has potential" to make it? Let me unpack this last statement because it's a bit radioactive. There are different gradations of potential and that's why I used quotation marks. There are men who have an education that confers a high competitive advantage in the job market, or skills that can catapult them to high rungs on the financial ladder. If a financially ambitious woman meets this kind of guy and he is working hard everyday to become financially stable and secure, then she can lower her standards a bit and grind with him, but only for a while. If after few months or years and this guy isn't making any progress and she decides to go, no one should blame her. Maybe the guy isn't smart enough or isn't just lucky enough. She has the right to leave him and find someone who is financially compatible with her. Yes.
But this only applies to men who have real potential, not some guy who just has a degree or skills and isn't taking diligent steps to improve his finances.

What most guys don't realize is that being broke or just having enough money to subsist, are indicative of certain traits women in general aren't attracted to. Traits like laziness, unintelligence, lack of ambition, bad luck, and a lack of good education. It's not the fault of a financially ambitious woman who is financially bouyant herself if she doesn't want to mingle with broke people, let alone date them.

Instead of dating a guy that has good qualities, the kind of women I am referring to would rather find financially bouyant and ambitious men like themselves, and then proceed to look for these good qualities. And YES they are justified in doing that. Abi is it only broke guys that have good qualities?

Lastly, if any guy is asking out women who don't fall into the category of women I am referring to, then such guy has low standards and deserves the rejection he is receiving from his fellow broke girl.

GuidoVanRossum:


Thanks dear.

I don't know why people feel one is less human for being broke. Even when I'm rich, I wouldn't want the type of this op for marriage. I don't pray I come across her type no matter the level of her wealth. If all rich girls have this kind of mentality, I better date broke girls.

itsmeurLady:


See pot calling kettle black... u started by pouring out ur negativity on my comments and now I'm the sad and toxic one Dayummmm, Nigga u need to check yourself!

DeeTus:
LOL. This is a sensitive question. Talk about something else please.

connectpoint:



ahahaha...gotcha bro... how's the couple life now?

MsRoe:
This is very well articulated. Logic wouldn't argue with this. Stupidity will.

DeeTus:
Hahahahaha. I am not married yet. Unless you want someone to create a thread on me.

GuidoVanRossum:


These characteristics you keep painting, do they guarantee good marital life?
The money, intelligence, diligence, discipline and co, do they transform into a happy home? What is marriage to you? Is it a business venture?


I pray I never meet someone with this mentality in life. To me, marriage is till death do us path no matter the circumstances, I wouldn't want to endure a hellish marital life because I made the wrong choice.

blackberlin:
This is exactly the problem with some ladies. Once they begin making some peanuts, they believe any guy earning less than them is of a lower status, unless they're desperate to get married cos their female clock is ticking, whereas a man could be as rich as Mike Adenuga and still chose to settle down with a peniless village girl because of love.

connectpoint:


hehehe I was about to ask about her......It seems you're on stable ground now.Nice one.. Such a beautiful thing to see a person of high standard found a match.... it feels like an african team winning the world cup... My salute to her.....

jintex:
bros if to say u dey close to me I for buy star lager beer, plenty bottle for this ur talk

Lubyna:


So if a woman has financial standards, she should now lower it for some guy because of what? What does the guy have to offer that more financially bouyant and ambitious men don't have? Is it by force to date somebori? It's not like she sees men as lower status, it's just that she can't date them. Shikena. Is it your life? Is it not her life?
Most wealthy men are ambitious, intelligent, well informed and successful, and when they marry, they marry equally intelligent, ambitious, well informed and successful women. Stop watching Nollywood movies and engage with reality.

Oh please. It's not only the women who marry rich men that suffer domestic abuse. Women who are married to broke men also suffer domestic abuse. Domestic violence occurs across all boards.

Lolzzz. Sorry to say this but you are so ignorant about reality. Who told you white women aren't concerned about financial status? How many white women do you know? There are women of different races who have financial standards, and so can't settle for less. And they have the right to. Instead of complaining and abusing them, why don't you strive to be financially successful so you can meet the standards of most women?

DeeTus:
LOL! Man, I never knew you are still on Nairaland. If not, I would have introduced you to one chick. She's from a well-to-do family and a quiet girl. Leave those call girls that make a lot of noise on here.

Ebayray:




Lmao @yr pic. This is exactly what I'm doing right now

Lubyna:


Sorry about my statement about you not being able to read. I didn't mean to be rude. That wasn't even my intention.

Women and men aren't the same. Men don't go into relationships for the same reasons as women and men certainly don't have the same needs or responsibilities as women. A guy dating a woman who is hardworking but broke, isn't the equivalent of a woman dating a guy who is broke. Men are conventionally, and I'd argue naturally the providers in a relationship. Women are naturally inclined to want their man to take the driving seat in the relationship, in all aspects. To put it plainly, women want men who can provide and take care of them. It doesn't mean she shouldn't strive to be financially successful, but this is the reality of relationships. On the other hand, no man goes into a relationship expecting his woman to take care of him. In fact, most men prefer to be more financially successful than their partners. I hope I have answered your question?

Don't bring me back to this. I have already explained what I meant. Yes. Being financially successful is indicative of intelligence. Intelligence is a broad them that admits of various definitions, but my definition of intelligence, which subsumes most of the definitions which you'd come across anywhere, is being able to utilize acquired knowledge in solving problems. And why are you fixating on Intelligence? There are other qualities I mentioned alongside intelligence that being wealthy is indicative of. Dino and Evans are intelligent people. Dino is a wealthy politician who has occupied various high level political posts in the past. You have to be intelligent to be able to do this. Evans was able to kidnap lots of people, gain profit from the act and remain hidden and undetected for many years. Only an intelligent person can achieve this. I am not in anyway justifying the morally reprehensible crimes of Evans and the bad things Dino Malaye has done in the past. I am just trying to answer your question about whether or not they are intelligent. When I say someone is financially successful, hardworking, ambitious and goal oriented, and wants someone who shares the same traits as she does, I am obviously not referring to people like Evans and Dino. The kind of women I categorically referred to in my OP certainly aren't concerned about just money. Money is a standard among other standards. Certainly this kind of woman would examine the past and present of her potential spouse. She'd date someone who she knows his source of income, and who she is certain this source of income is safe and won't jeopardize her life in the future. Obviously someone like Evans and yahoo boys don't fit this criteria. You are making it seem like all financially successful men are touts or kidnappers and all broke guys are morally upright.

Lubyna:


Sorry about my statement about you not being able to read. I didn't mean to be rude. That wasn't even my intention.

Women and men aren't the same. Men don't go into relationships for the same reasons as women and men certainly don't have the same needs or responsibilities as women. A guy dating a woman who is hardworking but broke, isn't the equivalent of a woman dating a guy who is broke. Men are conventionally, and I'd argue naturally the providers in a relationship. Women are naturally inclined to want their man to take the driving seat in the relationship, in all aspects. To put it plainly, women want men who can provide and take care of them. It doesn't mean she shouldn't strive to be financially successful, but this is the reality of relationships. On the other hand, no man goes into a relationship expecting his woman to take care of him. In fact, most men prefer to be more financially successful than their partners. I hope I have answered your question?

Don't bring me back to this. I have already explained what I meant. Yes. Being financially successful is indicative of intelligence. Intelligence is a broad them that admits of various definitions, but my definition of intelligence, which subsumes most of the definitions which you'd come across anywhere, is being able to utilize acquired knowledge in solving problems. And why are you fixating on Intelligence? There are other qualities I mentioned alongside intelligence that being wealthy is indicative of. Dino and Evans are intelligent people. Dino is a wealthy politician who has occupied various high level political posts in the past. You have to be intelligent to be able to do this. Evans was able to kidnap lots of people, gain profit from the act and remain hidden and undetected for many years. Only an intelligent person can achieve this. I am not in anyway justifying the morally reprehensible crimes of Evans and the bad things Dino Malaye has done in the past. I am just trying to answer your question about whether or not they are intelligent. When I say someone is financially successful, hardworking, ambitious and goal oriented, and wants someone who shares the same traits as she does, I am obviously not referring to people like Evans and Dino. The kind of women I categorically referred to in my OP certainly aren't concerned about just money. Money is a standard among other standards. Certainly this kind of woman would examine the past and present of her potential spouse. She'd date someone who she knows his source of income, and who she is certain this source of income is safe and won't jeopardize her life in the future. Obviously someone like Evans and yahoo boys don't fit this criteria. You are making it seem like all financially successful men are touts or kidnappers and all broke guys are morally upright.

RaggedyAnn:
For anyone who cares to be objective, this makes a lot of sense. Good one, Op.


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