The ways some guys they spend money you go fear fear.

@poster
you will reap what you have sown.

As at the time i met her she told me she has no boy friend but she told me about her past love life,  Some people here are asking whether she has succumbed or not, when a girl cannot pass a day without sending mail to a guy or hearing from the guy, what do u call that? She's is even imploring the guy to come back to Nigeria that she earnestly wants to see him. In a nut shell, she has started missing the guy.I don't really know much about 9ja babes but this game is serious, if she's really playing game with this guy what tells me she's not also playing the same game with me,

;

All is not lost.  Put her in check, some people are curiuos about other things.  I say go and put her in check, tell her she needs to come out and come clean or she can kiss your money bags good bye.

I don't understand how come you can't find yourself a nice Spainard?   What is up with Nigerian men going back home to the motherland when plenty of women everywhere?

Man broaden your horizons!!!  It is 2010!

Don Xavi:

As at the time i met her she told me she has no boy friend but she told me about her past love life, Some people here are asking whether she has succumbed or not, when a girl cannot pass a day without sending mail to a guy or hearing from the guy what do u call that? She's is even imploring the guy to come back to Nigeria that she earnestly want to see him in the nut shell she has started missing the guy. really i don't know much about 9ja babes but this game is serious, if she's really playing game with this guy what tells me she's not also playing the same game with me,

Odikwa serious! Please share with us the content of the mail,is it an everyday kinda mail or it has sexual undertones?
If you really want to get to the end of this 'trust game',get a real guy in real life to chyke the gurl. If she falls. . .yawa!

@ Poster, i beg ignore all these females trying to convince you that you're the one at fault here. Trust me, if you tell her to meet you at a hotel in lagos [ as the the fake facebook guy] she will show up there with bad intentions. There's nothing wrong with a little curiosity which you showed by opening the fake facebook account. Any respectable girl will politely turn down any advances on facebook even if she initially added the person as a friend. There is no reason for her to stay in contact daily with a stranger if she doesn't have any ulterior motives.
By the way you shouldn't have showered her with all those expensive gifts, that S@!#t never works.

do we need to tell you that you're dull or u've been scammed

hauler:

@ Poster, i beg ignore all these females trying to convince you that you're the one at fault here. Trust me, if you tell her to meet you at a hotel in lagos [ as the the fake facebook guy] she will show up there with bad intentions. There's nothing wrong with a little curiosity which you showed by opening the fake facebook account. Any respectable girl will politely turn down any advances on facebook even if she initially added the person as a friend. There is no reason for her to stay in contact daily with a stranger if she doesn't have any ulterior motives.
By the way you shouldn't have showered her with all those expensive gifts, that S@!#t never works.

Please my brother tell am, he has to wise up, you are there sending euro and another brother is doing the shining, you must be some sick dude to even pay her fees, i am so ashamed of you.

@poster
the same thing happen to me with an ex gf (although not engaged)
here is the low down:
tell her that you fell in love wit her bla bla bla and that you will come to 9ja and explain to her that you will take her on shopping spree etc BUT that you expect to be "physical" afterwards.
or better yet, tell her that you will pay her ticket to come on a week holiday in some exotic location with you but that there will be only ONE hotel room and only ONE BED. her answer will let you know what kind of woman she truly is.

then when you have all the proof that she is willing to go and meet some other guy, ask her(as her fiance) who that new person on her FB is. if she is honest about it then fair enough but if she lies about who that mysterious person is then better watch out for what more you may uncover!

hmm well bad situation no doubt @ poster.





but to all those generalizing as if women cant be gotten in the same manner everywhere- do you yourself have the qualities you look for in others.

if the town tap complains about finding the town well, then that simply doesnt makes sense.

1) How do you know THAT SHE DOESN'T KNOW IT IS YOU THAT SHE IS TALKING TO? She might already know that you are that fictitious person and is seeing just how far you will take it.

2) Do EXACTLY WHAT Mrbrownjay just said - IT WILL WORK - FIND OUT HOW FAR SHE WILL GO WITH THE FICTITIOUS PERSON.

flirting,

Well- some say that when you look for sh*T you get Sh8*t, and that is exactly what you got! The fact that you even felt the need to do that- shows that you did not trust the gal from the beginning, Move on

Biggups to you for playing that detective on her, that was smart. Oldboy even marriage is going techno nowadays, you are sure wisening up the menfolk! I will not advise my brother to marry a woman who will not be faithful to him but that one test is not enough as some posters also said. If it were a more concrete physical test, only then do you have an evidence. She really failed that test but try forgive her, even if she no be better person you can mould her into one through lots of love. She may be trying to play safe and not put all her eggs in one basket, not that I am justifying that action of hers----------the length you guys have gone, she should be faithful but she may have acted so from feeling insecure. . Do you guys communicate enough through the distance? Loneliness can tempt her into that too.

[/quote][quote author=Ladyjide link=topic=533929.msg6968251#msg6968251 date=1287451796]
Well- some say that when you look for excreta you get Sh8*t, and that is exactly what you got! The fact that you even felt the need to do that- shows that you did not trust the gal from the beginning, Move on

@ Ladyjide I suppose, for something to be certified it needs to first pass through a test and that's exactly what I did, u cannot start trusting someone without the person earning that trust. this is a girl I never knew before and for me to trust her she needed to prove it. our plan was that after our weeding she'll stay back to finish her studies, Do u expect me to leave a woman I don't trust back in Naija alone? please!

Ivynwa:

Biggups to you for playing that detective on her, that was smart. Oldboy even marriage is going techno nowadays, you are sure wisening up the menfolk! I will not advise my brother to marry a woman who will not be faithful to him but that one test is not enough as some posters also said. If it were a more concrete physical test, only then do you have an evidence. She really failed that test but try forgive her, even if she no be better person you can mould her into one through lots of love. She may be trying to play safe and not put all her eggs in one basket, not that I am justifying that action of hers----------the length you guys have gone, she should be faithful but she may have acted so from feeling insecure. Distant relationship is no easy thing-----especially for a sexually active adult. Do you guys communicate enough through the distance? Loneliness can tempt her into that too.
I was and is still feeling happy for your said fiance that almost got blessed and still wish that she stands firm that things work out good for her.

@Ivynwa I called her every blessed day and sent her text message first thing almost every morning, Is that not sufficient communication? doing that I was trying to make her have the assurance and security that I'm there for her.

Maybe because of many stories about guys abroad jilting home base girls and breaking their hearts. Let's say maybe because of that she didn't wanna put all her eggs in one basket. I don't really know what her justification would be for this mistrust.

o boy make u run from the babe oh, the babe na proper campues babes that go about claimimg that my guy is overseas while another person dey do sanitation on ur behalf,,,,,,but u funny sha so u dey spain a matured sexually active bebe go dey here dey wait for u cos u pay her scchool fees, so u think she no know say as u dey there u catch ur fun with the white ladies there and think that by payin her fees, she will not feel the urge to make things happen any how,,,,,,,,,,guy shine ur eye, just do ur best for her and have an alternative that he way ou . i have nice chicks that u will lve to meet ,decent hit me lets talk if u care ,dont put ur egges in one basket,,,,,,,,, how spain now hook me with some white chiks, lol

What I have in mind to say is that you tell her (using the profile of her facebook guy) that you are coming to Nigeria on so so so date and ask her to wait in the airport for you. You can send a friend or a brother to go check her out at the airport on that day and while she is there you can call her phone and ask where she is to know whether she will lie on top of it.There are other ways to be sure of her.

hooklover:

o boy make u run from the babe oh, the babe na proper campues babes that go about claimimg that my guy is overseas while another person dey do sanitation on your behalf,,,,,,but u funny sha so u dey spain a matured sexually active bebe go dey here dey wait for u cos u pay her scchool fees, so u think she no know say as u dey there u catch your fun with the white ladies there and think that by payin her fees, she will not feel the urge to make things happen any how,,,,,,,,,,guy shine your eye, just do your best for her and have an alternative that he way ou . i have nice chicks that u will lve to meet ,decent hit me lets talk if u care ,dont put your egges in one basket,,,,,,,,, how spain now hook me with some white chiks, lol

So funny

Wishing you all the best!

yanga dey sleep trouble go wake am. Na wetin you dey find?
Wahala, you dey find, wahala you go get o.

Don't also want to seem like I am wishing another bad. I wish every woman good especially in this uncomfortable box that the society and culture has fixed us in. I honestly wish for a future when things are easier for anybody that desires family and kids be it a woman or man.

@Poster:

I'll give u one of the earliest lessons u learn in Law School: "Never ask that which you do not already know the answer". You'll get burnt in the process

What you did was effectively "asking" your fiancee if she was cheating on you, Now you dont like the answer youre getting.

You do know women go for what they hear, men go for what they see, right? Maybe your alter-ego is spitting some mean internet game to ur gal, how do u expect her not to fall? Why do u think The Amaka, Chiogo, Ileke-Idi, Michelin08, Abekeade88, Ogugua08, Googles, Inked Nerd, Mz DarkSkin and co are all crazily in luv with me even tho all they read are my words? Cause I spits a mean game, nigga!

So, one word of advise to you; stop the bull! You sought and seem to have found the woman of your dreams, build on the relationship and try to nurture the love you two should be feeling for each other, not destroy it. So, except u have serious self-esteem issues, I'll advice you to close that FB account and concentrate on developing ur relationship with ur woman!

**Eavesdropping**

@poster:

Is simple,give her an appointment in a hotel, tell her your there give room number,give your Nigerian MTN cell number and ask her to call you once she arrived so you can come down and pick her,if she does come then she fails you.

Every woman will do what she has done,they are never satisfy with one man,even when they are in love, engaged with to a rich man they still need new friends.

I once did it with Chioma,Chioma is based in lagos i base in Abuja,then i got a new Glo number and wanted to see how she will act, i send her sms thanking her for last time and how i will like us to meet again in the same hotel,she reply and ask who is this, i said am the one that love sucking your pusccy,and ask can you come to the same hotel? she reply and said when, i said am on my way,do you know this chioma went there called me and said she is there now,i ask her to take somethings and keep herself busy till i arrived, she took Guinness and chicken and was having fun,meanwhile am in abuja,she text me how she can't wait for me to come and do justice to her pusccy that i should come fast,i reply am coming,after 2 hours there was no sign of me,she called that she has taken 2 bottles of Big guinness and a full chicken waiting as she has nothing on her to pay incase am not coming i should try my best to come,then i told her my real name and thats is my new number,she was like more than confuse,that was the end of our love, this is a girl i have done engagement ceremony with,3 months to our wedding.

So you can see it takes the mercy of God to find a REAL woman for marriage,all this girls here talking nonsense will do exactly like her or chioma.No woman can pass such test.

@Oga Occultist(abeg I refuse to follow call you that name sef so try get another one abeg)

Every woman can't act like that, a woman that is 3 months to her wedding acting that lousy. Infact only one in 100 women will do that my friend but why our Chynwa come behave so. OMG!, you men have really wisened up nowadays and are giving us women exams wey hard pass Jamb exam sef. Abeg make God give me my own sef make I comot for them spinsterhood temptations abeg, God knows most people like me have tried Ojare.

@Ivynwa:

Sorry i can't change my name,thanks for your comment,till now am still friendly with chioma's family but no more marriage. Your right we men have really wisened up nowadays and are giving you women exams wey hard pass Jamb exam,so better be faithful to your Man when God send him your way. In this forum there is always something tolearn no matter how bad the topic might be. I use my new number to know who chioma really is and that save me from marrying an adultress woman though i lost all money i have invested on her i still consider myself VERY LUCKY and give God the glory for all is well that ends well.

Ivynwa:

It's taking lots of courage out of me to say this as a joke but I am very serious about this and will try hard not to let what anything any nairalander will say about this hurt me.

Mr. Don Xavi, I only mean to say in all humility that if our sister no appreciate her relationship that a person like me is out here wishing very much for a family and some sweet looking kids. She is my fellow lady and thinking of her as a young lady like me and her parents that you have taken her to who are already anticipating a suitor for their daughter, I wish good for her and wish it all work out positive for her but if you do decided to look out for somebody else. I will appreciate it if we can get to know ourselves and see whether we are compatible. I love children very much, wants somebody to love and be loved in return and I am not pretending about it.I am a 34 year old Engineer and do not live in Nigeria. I am a decent person but is not claiming perfection either, ever since I was a kid I have always wanted and wished for just one man for myself.
I am being real and honest to my self even when I know that this will draw mockery from most people here but that same people will still mock me if I turn 45 and come here to ask people to wipe my tears that I have no children and family and if I shut up my mouth here and die of loneliness those same people will open threads here and tell the story of a Nigerian lady that died of loneliness abroad. I have been seriously on the lookout for somebody decent to have a family with and have even had threads on that looking (Seun and Mukina) knows better,  like I said I know I am going to start getting crucified this very minute, for doing what? For being honest. What is my only sin here?----that I said it as it is in my heart and refusing to die of loneliness. Abeg my brother I wish you well whatever happens to the relationship and still wishes you a better woman too, most of us are out there comforting ourselves and waiting and wishing. Isn't that all our culture can enable us do? Abi una go gree me carry mmanya ngwo go marry man bikonu. Abeg I don talk my own-o-o, nobody wipes my tears of loneliness for me here in Nairaland abeg. It is very natural for both man and woman to desire children and family, I think it's even God that infused those desires in us all to make us want to procreate in the first place so I am only expressing a natural feeling here.

I salute ur courage Aunty. My sincere prayer is that you find that man that'l be your husband.
I dont knw how true this is but there's a general belief that our sisters abroad find it hard gettin married. If ths is true,please take 2yrz to settle in 9ja,socialise and with your kinda personality,luck will shine on you. I wish I have a brother who I can link up with you,but all the same,the land is green,you'l find that someone soon,trust me!

Ivynwa, my prayers are with you. My heart almost broke reading your comment. I wish you all the best!

@Tink-sh
Tink is that really you talking to me? I hope you can still remember me. That wasn't a nice way to treat a friend dear. I could not believe it to the point that I did not know what to say but keep mute.