fresh_dude: What exactly is she asserting, and why does she need any asserting, are we in a contest for whoseopinion matters most?You really need to read up on the meaning of 'unconditional' love Why wouldnt it, aint gon be running around with vegetables.Well I dont believe in competing with my woman or bending over backwards to impress her, if she dont like me the way I is, she can go fcck that transgendered above. Thank you, hope I answered your question?

TisaBone: I did not say aggressive, but assertive.

the type of woman that will love you unconditionally, but as soon as you mess up, will tell you your shit stinks. the type that doesn't take any mess, and doesn't believe in second chances and will leave you in a heartbeat if you are not acting right. the type of woman that carries her own weight. does this turn you on, or are you not man enough to handle such a woman?

ypzilanti: a simple rule that will serve all women: never date or marry a man you do not respect.

bukatyne: d first question should be who is an assertive woman? most people mistake assertive for aggressive. most times people amaze me: when they hear a woman that knows her left from her right, they say she is rude, she ll be proud etc just as when a lady says she's equal to a guy, she is seen as rude, unmarriageable (like marriage is the ultimate) etc. been rude or proud is totally different from been assertive. as a christian (male or female), when u have d fruits of d Spirit, u ll be kind, patient, loving, faithful, hopeful, longsuffering, tolerant, have self control and peaceful. so been rude is not been assertive, it is been rude. @onegai: out of al d women u mentioned, it's jezebel that was odd and not because she was assertive but she was evil, an idol worshipper etc. check out the profile of a noble wife prov 31:10 - 31. n ur dad had no excuse to cheat on ur mom. God expects everybody to play their part if d other one does or not. we have a lot of women in the Bible who knew wat they wanted n did it however, they were not rude. @bennyraz: i don't know wat to say, i just wonder if it were ur friend's gf that was loose, if ur friend ll go that far. someone was usin d comparism of Jesus Christ n d Church. let me ask u: ow many men love their wives d way Jesus Christ loves His Church? u don't worship ur husband, u submit to him. it is only God alone that deserves our worship. sorry for d epistle! have a splendid day!

Onegai: My love, I'm gonna hazard a guess at your age. About 25 or a little above or below. You sound like me at that age.
I see from your signature you're a christian. Now let me refer you to the bible. Go point out all the assertive ladies in there, let me know how it worked out for them. I'll wait (pours myself a drink of OJ).

See the difference btw Jezebel, Esther, Bathsheba, Mary and Deborah? Both strong,but one was calm, and the other didn't take shit and was equal to her man in screwing up. Guess who suffered? The bible says "Men, love your wives as Christ loves the church". So your man is meant to cover and protect you. So what does the church do? It worships Christ. Ergo, you're meant to worship your man. The church does not say "'xcuse Jesus, I don't like what you just said or did so I'm not gonna follow" and sit down glaring at him. So what's the shi.t about "I won't take crap, get to stepping if you piss me off, I am Woman hear me roarrrrr!!"?
A strong woman, does not need to be like what you described to be strong. I know a lot of strong, i-dont-take-crap girls. They declare their strength, then go to the kitchen, dish their man's food, serve him and prefix every sentence to him with "darling". They're submissive. If they couldn't be, they'd be single. To quote a white, aethist relationship coach (so you know that ALL men are alike) "men have to be strong in front of their friends and the world and it gets exhausting. T[b]hey don't want to marry and keep fighting for strength at home. So it's great that you have a Ph.d, speak 4 languages and climbed Mt. Everest, if you don't make him feel like a man, he won't care about that and marry you.[/b]"
What men want is for you to be emotionally stable and strong, in case they're not home, to hold down the fort, but when they show up, baby, get on your knees.

Onegai:

If you're waiting for your man to love you as Christ loved the church, better leave him it's easier to change yourself than change him. See Vashti and Esther: the same King made unreasonable demands, which woman got him to do what she wanted?? Who was more successful, Madam dont-try-my-beauty-and-order-me-around-in-front-of-your-friends or Mrs Darling-your-wish-is-my-command?? When you love him stupidly, he will act like a fool to please you. TRUST ME! There's a time to stand your ground and 80 percent of the time, is NOT the right time.
Mehn I don tire talk

TisaBone: I did not say aggressive, but assertive.

the type of woman that will love you unconditionally, but as soon as you mess up, will tell you your shit stinks. the type that doesn't take any mess, and doesn't believe in second chances and will leave you in a heartbeat if you are not acting right. the type of woman that carries her own weight. does this turn you on, or are you not man enough to handle such a woman?

ypzilanti: a simple rule that will serve all women: never date or marry a man you do not respect.

cowgurl: Dude, wat d hell r u barkin @? Zap off n giv rum 2 dos who's gat ansas 2 d Op's questions!

bukatyne: d first question should be who is an assertive woman? most people mistake assertive for aggressive. most times people amaze me: when they hear a woman that knows her left from her right, they say she is rude, she ll be proud etc just as when a lady says she's equal to a guy, she is seen as rude, unmarriageable (like marriage is the ultimate) etc. been rude or proud is totally different from been assertive. as a christian (male or female), when u have d fruits of d Spirit, u ll be kind, patient, loving, faithful, hopeful, longsuffering, tolerant, have self control and peaceful. so been rude is not been assertive, it is been rude. @onegai: out of al d women u mentioned, it's jezebel that was odd and not because she was assertive but she was evil, an idol worshipper etc. check out the profile of a noble wife prov 31:10 - 31. n ur dad had no excuse to cheat on ur mom. God expects everybody to play their part if d other one does or not. we have a lot of women in the Bible who knew wat they wanted n did it however, they were not rude. @bennyraz: i don't know wat to say, i just wonder if it were ur friend's gf that was loose, if ur friend ll go that far. someone was usin d comparism of Jesus Christ n d Church. let me ask u: ow many men love their wives d way Jesus Christ loves His Church? u don't worship ur husband, u submit to him. it is only God alone that deserves our worship. sorry for d epistle! have a splendid day!

TisaBone: I did not say aggressive, but assertive.

the type of woman that will love you unconditionally, but as soon as you mess up, will tell you your shit stinks. the type that doesn't take any mess, and doesn't believe in second chances and will leave you in a heartbeat if you are not acting right. the type of woman that carries her own weight. does this turn you on, or are you not man enough to handle such a woman?

lurkee:

"The kind of men that like assertive women are the kind that are calm, easy going and no-wahala kind of men. Every man is different." This is the part i think i like the most because i have these qualities and i'd like a woman who is very assertive, i haven't met one though...My Regards. [/font][/size]

chucky234: That's where women get it all wrong,the words "assertive and unconditional" are two words that don't seem to compliment each other because a woman who love her man unconditionally will always give him a second chance,assertiveness to be should go with infatuation and not unconditional love.
I once dated a pretty girl who I cared so much about and wanted to marry,she was very assertive and loving as well. We got into trouble when she met me with another girl (I was just discussing with her) and she grew furious,picked her bag and went home.
I was running after her begging for 6 whole months but she bluffed me that nothing will make her change her mind,on the 8th month she began to call me by then I already made up my mind to move on.
On the 9th she decided to come but it was late because another already got pregnant for me and she was devasted and still regret it today,I later married the woman who turned out to be the most wonderful woman on earth and we are happy together. The one you guys called assertive is still single and 33 years old now,I was bent on marrying but because she didn't want to give me a second chance made her life miserable.
I still call her time to time to offer her advices and guidance.

Onegai: Here's what you guys are missing: worship the way I meant was total submission. Not the submission most women practise, which is to submit till the ring is on her finger. Most assertive ladies will not tell you they're assertive, they'll simply show it. And still, they submit. Jezebel joined her husband equally in everything he did, she wasn't content to sit on the sidelines. No one has a right to cheat on anyone, but if it happens, do you vex, do you walk out or do you fix things? That's what separates kids from adults, the ability not to run away when the going gets tough: about my mum and dad. Declare over and over again: "I demand my respect, my husband WILL NOT TRY me and I'll accept it". Great. Let me know when you get married if that's the reality.
I'm the youngest of people in their 40s, and I've seen marriage up close. When life is about starting afresh with kids, and the loneliness and struggles of being a single parent, submission gets DARN easy. The only thing to do is choose well who you marry.
One of my sisters is assertive, everyone loves and respects her, she's married and has her problems. The other is assertive-aggressive and 37, and single and people avoid her. The best marriage in my family goes to the calm, nice sister, who's husband is even younger than her. Make what you will of that.
There's nothing wrong with assertive, but when people react badly to your assertiveness, it's because you're being aggressive or having attitude.

TisaBone:

so a man has to be a b//tch in order for his woman to be assertive? what are you talking about? I did not say domineering, but I believe women should stand up for themselves and not accept less than what they know they deserve from a man. and I do know what unconditional love is, and I'm aware that we are only human and that people mess up, but that does not mean you allow a man/woman to continue making the same mistakes over and over again, with you being the recipient of this maltreatment. And yes, relationships with assertive women and a man confident enough to accept his woman the way she is do last. you know why? because there is mutual respect. no one is over the other. there is the understanding that there is a give and take. both parties must submit at one time or another.

samyng:


wow hope most girls would take note of this abeg.. Most women are the cause of failed marriage but if they just follow this then 80% of failed marriage would never had happened.. They need know that we don't want to marry and keep fighting for strength at home

TisaBone: I did not say aggressive, but assertive.

the type of woman that will love you unconditionally, but as soon as you mess up, will tell you your shit stinks. the type that doesn't take any mess, and doesn't believe in second chances and will leave you in a heartbeat if you are not acting right. the type of woman that carries her own weight. does this turn you on, or are you not man enough to handle such a woman?