aisha2:


Why dont you speak with your wife? Why automatically assume the worst?
Isnt it your wife you should be talking with? Why do you expect online strangers to have the answer?

5minsmadness:
MygeeZ
Your thread is about to be derailed. If I were you I would take advice from the first twelve(12) comments you got and move on, ignore the rest. This is for your own good.

chii8:
Mtcheeeew,some men shaa,ur wife is using pills n u nw want divorce?....

Ur last child is barely two n u want anoda child,na ur type dey leave wife for hosiptal if the third one is also a girl.

Na only u waka com abi?

EfemenaXY:


Awww...truth hurts, doesn't it?

Besides, haven't you got a thread to attend to? Last time I checked, you had World War III going down there.

5minsmadness:

Yeah it does, if its the truth.
What thread?

EfemenaXY:


That thread.

Remember?

5minsmadness:

The last thread we encountered in was the western indecency destroying out morals thread. I have since abandoned it to you guys since I already got my message across. Or is there another one?

EfemenaXY:


Aisha, forget that one sef.

Just take a look at his posts (assuming they're real sef. I'm always skeptical about these sort of threads). The guy is obviously a domineering freak who feels comfortable using phrases like:

~ My consent (like seriously? She needs his permission in deciding what's best for her body?)

~ I feel betrayed

~ I'm thinking of giving her a 3 year break. (Shuo! thinking? Not sure? No discussion? Equates to no serious family planning IMHO)

Then just check this out:





The heck! What is this? ^^

The dude's all over the place. So much I think he's having us on. He feels betrayed, suspects the kids aren't his, and yet wants to "score" a child with her?

And we call this a married "man"? Abeg make we hear word jor. U said it all,of course it's a mans world abi,women do a lot of preparations b4 taking in,financially,physically & so on,instead of u to ask her,u think it an opportunity to do what has been on your mind,he who wears d shoe knows where it pinches

Mtcheew!

EfemenaXY:


What makes you think they aren't for you?

Or are you indirectly saying every married woman on the pill is cheating on her husband? You think usage of contraceptive pills is a yardstick for measuring infidelity?

Guitarlife:
Kinda fuuny how ladies are rallying round Ops wife....I feel for OP. DEciet always leaves a bad taste in the mouth especially when it involves spouses. Op please learn to deal with the issue as maturedly as possible. Thats why am so so scared of marriage. [s]You give others the power to hurt you once you love or get married[/s].

EfemenaXY:


Why would you abandon that smoking, red-hot thread of yours? Biko, go back and tend to your garden man!

And ye shall enjoy the fruit of your nairaland labour...

EfemenaXY:


Why should you feel betrayed? Over what?

It's her body, not yours. Besides, you won't be the one left holding the baby, making sacrifices and keeping a big chunk of your life on hold - she will.

EfemenaXY:


Ooohhh! So that's the real issue.

Looks like @OP has found himself someone else and is looking for an excuse to divorce his wife.

Well, maybe wifey has smelled a rat somewhere and is simply preparing for the inevitable. Good on her not to want to take in again, knowing her marriage is on shaky grounds!

mygeeZ:
Honestly i feel betrayed.. I am praying and asking God to give me grace to continue in this bondage of a marriage.
All the same marriage found on deceit cant stand the test of time.. Could divorce be an option now?

EfemenaXY:


Why should you feel betrayed? Over what?

It's her body, not yours. Besides, you won't be the one left holding the baby, making sacrifices and keeping a big chunk of your life on hold - she will.

mygeeZ:
What if complications arises? dont you think its gonna affect me.

njokusboy:


You never disappoint


If she sleeps with another man, it's also her body, not so?

mygeeZ:
Thanks all.. i really appreciate all ur response and suggestions. Marriage itself is a continuos process of learning.
I discused with my wife, made my fears and worries known to her.
also told her of possible complications and side effects..
In marriage a woman no longer owns her body likewise men so the partners consent is needed to avoid betrayal. My annoyance is not that she used pills but doing it without telling me.

ottizz:

This is a very bad advice to give to married women that want to keep their family intact. In essence, it is okay for a man to undergo vasectomy without discussing it with his wife, because according to you, it is his body.

EfemenaXY:

What sort of "complications"? Kindly explain.

EfemenaXY:


What a joke.

So in the space of less than 12 hours, you've miraculously overcome your overwhelming feelings of:

~ Acute ownership

~ Unbearable betrayal

~ insurmountable bondage

~ And of course trust issues - so severe that you were contemplating DNA testing your kids and divorcing your wife

To the point where you've sat her down to tell her the possible side effects and risks of incorporating Family Planning?

Really.