its seems your friend wants to go through hell in hes marriage...
and i still cant believe they are still peeps out there that allow their families to dictate who they can or cant marry..
tell him to go back to hes ex if he likes himself

Thanks for your comments. The lady earns around 180k but she mentioned that she spends around 300k when going shopping and she is scared she would no longer be able to do that if she marries him as she would have to contribute almost all her salary to maintaining the family.

duchez:
Hello N'landers.

My friend just shared his story with me. I have advised him but I need your thoughts.

He met a lady around March this year and they became friends. He is an Accountant and works with a Federal Government Agency in Abuja. Along the line he asked her out and she insisted he finishes his ICAN before they can start dating.

Long story short, she later accepted to date him. Probably because he passed all but one of the exams in the Professional stage of ICAN. He recently invested some huge sum of money into a biz deal. He told me it was actually all of his savings and he would become a multi millionaire if the deal works out.

He decided to test this lady to find out if she will stick with him if the going ever gets tough (as a result of our insistence that the lady isn't really into him). And so he told her that the deal he was working on had failed and that he has become broke. He said he will like to marry her and try to sustain themselves on his current salary of about 180k pending when things become better but she replied that she can't marry someone who is earning 180k monthly. She feels it would make her drop from her standard of living as she wants to live inside the city of Abuja and not in the outskirts like Karu or Kubwa. Mind you, her parents live in one of these places and the guy is not even thinking of living in anywhere beyond these places like Nyanya/Mararaba.

This guy loves this girl so bad and is a very hardworking guy. He is hoping to get promoted when he completes his ICAN and is even looking at getting a better job in a bigger Government Agency or a Multinational company. He is so distraught at what the lady said. We have advised him to forget about her and move on, but he is considering opening up to the lady that what he said about the deal was just a test in the hope to make her re-consider him.

Please, were we wrong with our advice? Meanwhile, this guy's ex loves him like there is no tomorrow and she will gladly marry him even if he was earning 30k monthly but due to family pressure on him to marry a graduate and an Igbo lady, he broke up with her. Me thinks he can still persuade his parents to accept the lady.

If you were in our shoes, will you advice your friend differently?

he who fails to listen will land in the grave..
Love is blind but marriage,cheating and disrepectfull woman will open ur eyes.

biacan:
Rawpadgin you can't do this to me after all I've done for you we both that car together remember....... ( crying )

you Still Never Wise Up

KaBabs1:


And that's a bad thing? I disagree with you. She's just being blunt and telling the guy that she cannot reduce her standard of living and live in the suburbs. A man must be a man and must able to take care of his wife and kids. She is not aware of this man's plans at all and that is probably why she declined his proposal. My advice is the guy should tell the lady his plans. If she rejects him again then I guess she's not just into him.

she wont reject him naw, since it's all a test, and the money is still there.

And the guy who has been blinded by love will Gladly take her back.
All in all, she loves the money more than the guy. Dazal

duchez:
Hello N'landers.

My friend just shared his story with me. I have advised him but I need your thoughts.

He met a lady around March this year and they became friends. He is an Accountant and works with a Federal Government Agency in Abuja. Along the line he asked her out and she insisted he finishes his ICAN before they can start dating.

Long story short, she later accepted to date him. Probably because he passed all but one of the exams in the Professional stage of ICAN. He recently invested some huge sum of money into a biz deal. He told me it was actually all of his savings and he would become a multi millionaire if the deal works out.

He decided to test this lady to find out if she will stick with him if the going ever gets tough (as a result of our insistence that the lady isn't really into him). And so he told her that the deal he was working on had failed and that he has become broke. He said he will like to marry her and try to sustain themselves on his current salary of about 180k pending when things become better but she replied that she can't marry someone who is earning 180k monthly. She feels it would make her drop from her standard of living as she wants to live inside the city of Abuja and not in the outskirts like Karu or Kubwa. Mind you, her parents live in one of these places and the guy is not even thinking of living in anywhere beyond these places like Nyanya/Mararaba.

This guy loves this girl so bad and is a very hardworking guy. He is hoping to get promoted when he completes his ICAN and is even looking at getting a better job in a bigger Government Agency or a Multinational company. He is so distraught at what the lady said. We have advised him to forget about her and move on, but he is considering opening up to the lady that what he said about the deal was just a test in the hope to make her re-consider him.

Please, were we wrong with our advice? Meanwhile, this guy's ex loves him like there is no tomorrow and she will gladly marry him even if he was earning 30k monthly but due to family pressure on him to marry a graduate and an Igbo lady, he broke up with her. Me thinks he can still persuade his parents to accept the lady.

If you were in our shoes, will you advice your friend differently?

U should ask him "what made the ex became an ex?"
Ohh, I see, cos she's not Igbo....that's a very archaic way of thinking

Nwodosis:
Why advertise poverty, who will buy?

What kind of talk is this? I won’t be surprised if u are still a student.

You want to do what you normally do abi?

biacan:
How much do you earn if I may ask

Dude please, just show him this thread. I just pity the dude. He thinks love is enough to set eternity. If he goes broke in the marriage someday isn't the marriage going to collapse? Does he need such partner and can he deal with that for the rest of his life? Love is not enough. But I don't think he'd listen to us. I just pity the dude. What a pity! And the dude even listens to his parent on the tribe to marry from! Are you sure he's ready?

it's she ni girl e ke....ko lo jile nao.. she think say e easy........ my theme still remains ladies and money are 5&6

KaBabs1:


And that's a bad thing? I disagree with you. She's just being blunt and telling the guy that she cannot reduce her standard of living and live in the suburbs. A man must be a man and must able to take care of his wife and kids. She is not aware of this man's plans at all and that is probably why she declined his proposal. My advice is the guy should tell the lady his plans. If she rejects him again then I guess she's not just into him.

Wow, izz like you didn't read it well. Even her parents live in the suburbs so which standard is she reducing o

biacan:
yes na you no I don't want to suffer in this marriage thing so that is why I'm asking........ except you're not rich enough to marry a girl like me which I doubt

Nwodosis:
Why advertise poverty, who will buy?

Question for the gods

.Op marrying that lady will be a huge mistake, you will later regret.

Don't allow family or unnecessary pressures stop you from marrying your true love.

U need to stand your ground and choose what's best for u.

That's my two cents.

Some men foolish sha.why dump an ex that loves u like mad and go for a lady wey no reason ur existence.na wao...and na men like dat go enter joro blog to rant dat all naija girls are golddiggers.u have an ex dat cares for u but u hell bent on enticing a slayqueen with money cos she refused u wen u told her u lost all d money to test her.anyway some men deserve the type of wives they get.

lefulefu:
Some men foolish sha.why dump an ex that loves u like mad and go for a lady wey no reason ur existence.na wao...and na men like dat go enter joro blog to rant dat all naija girls are golddiggers.u have an ex dat cares for u but u hell bent on enticing a slayqueen with money cos she refused u wen u told her u lost all d money to test her.anyway some men deserve the type of wives they get.

Very true.

Lefulefu, please I need your advice. Can I ask you? As a Benin guy

alexialin:





Very true.

Lefulefu, please I need your advice. Can I ask you? As a Benin guy

oya fire on

lefulefu:
oya fire on

OK dear. I spoke to my fiance this morning and we spoke at length on events coming up this month. And one of such events is meeting his whole family.

I want to know what to wear, what to give to my would be in-laws this Xmas.
They are from Benin.

My fiance has already planned to introduce me to his family, so I become familiar and cosy with everyone . And they are all guys, he's number 4 or so and I will get to.meet his dad for the first time, his siblings, then his younger sisters are all married but I think they will be around that day.

It will be a full house.
Phew! am kind of worried. How do I behave around the sisters, his brothers and his parents.
Do I need to dress in native attire like long skirt and all? Do I need to wear scarf?. Sighs
Am filled with all sorts of tension within me as Xmas eve draws close.

I don't know anything about Benin women and men way of accepting people from other tribes.
So what do I do?

And what kind of gifts should I take along?

As the week draws near, am tensed about it.

Please help your sister Biko.

Please op I'm single and searching
Link me up with that friend of yours
No time for dulling

alexialin:









OK dear. I spoke to my fiance this morning and we spoke at length on events coming up this month. And one of such events is meeting his whole family.

I want to know what to wear, what to give to my would be in-laws this Xmas.
They are from Benin.

My fiance has already planned to introduce me to his family, so I become familiar and cosy with everyone . And they are all guys, he's number 4 or so and I will get to.meet his dad for the first time, his siblings, then his younger sisters are all married but I think they will be around that day.

It will be a full house.
Phew! am kind of worried. How do I behave around the sisters, his brothers and his parents.
Do I need to dress in native attire like long skirt and all? Do I need to wear scarf?. Sighs
Am filled with all sorts of tension within me as Xmas eve draws close.

I don't know anything about Benin women and men way of accepting people from other tribes.
So what do I do?

And what kind of gifts should I take along?

As the week draws near, am tensed about it.

Please help your sister Biko.

any dress will do as long as e no expose ur booby or other parts like dose endtime slayqueens for integram. But if u want to be comfortable u can wear a jeans and T shirt cos the weather for Benin right now is quite warm but if ur guy say na native he want make una wear den u listen to him.it depends on the dress ur guy wants u to wear cos na im know im parents. On the issue of wat to buy for d parents u can buy wine for d dad and the mom its either shoe or handbag.be very polite and friendly when u are with them.during ur first visit if u notice im mom dey kitchen then u enter the kitchen and pally with the mama..this is very important. They might cross examine u to know the type of lady u are so just act all friendly and open to the parents.no form ooo and abeg don't do any feminist behaviour for dere(i know u not a feminazi). For the siblings get to know dem and if ur guy has a sister also try to get close to her.Benin ppl are hardly tribalistic and besides edo state as a whole is very accommodating to strangers...though some few bad eggs fit dey sha.

lefulefu:
any dress will do as long as e no expose ur booby or other parts like dose endtime slayqueens for integram. But if u want to be comfortable u can wear a jeans and T shirt cos the weather for Benin right now is quite warm but if ur guy say na native he want make una wear den u listen to him.it depends on the dress ur guy wants u to wear cos na im know im parents. On the issue of wat to buy for d parents u can buy wine for d dad and the mom its either shoe or handbag.be very polite and friendly when u are with them.during ur first visit if u notice im mom dey kitchen then u enter the kitchen and pally with the mama..this is very important. They might cross examine u to know the type of lady u are so just act all friendly and open to the parents.no form ooo and abeg don't do any feminist behaviour for dere(i know u not a feminazi). For the siblings get to know dem and if ur guy has a sister also try to get close to her.Benin ppl are hardly tribalistic and besides edo state as a whole is very accommodating to strangers...though some few bad eggs fit dey sha.

Phew!
Mehn God bless u dear
That's so helpful, although my friends were the ones who said I should wear native, while my guy said I can wear any English decent attire, am looking at a knee length formal gown ,and just be myself and be calm.

He always jokes that they will whoop my assz if I misbehave there.
And am like whoop assz ke!

Is that how Benin people behave? He will then laugh hysterically as he looks on at me. Cos I feel they shouldn't be this archaic.
this is 21st century!

But with what uv explained now, u made it sound easy
Perfect then.

OK I will buy wine for the dad and very good handbag possibly add quality Ankara for the mum. She will love it.
I will keep the tips uv mentioned close to my heart.
I won't form one bit. So help me God.

You are a life saver dear . My mind Don rest small.. I will try my best.

Phew! This is one interesting holiday coming ahead

Thanks so much dear

Wow!

KaBabs1:


And that's a bad thing? I disagree with you. She's just being blunt and telling the guy that she cannot reduce her standard of living and live in the suburbs. A man must be a man and must able to take care of his wife and kids. She is not aware of this man's plans at all and that is probably why she declined his proposal. My advice is the guy should tell the lady his plans. If she rejects him again then I guess she's not just into him.

.... it obvious you don't have wisdom. Even our creator test us to know how faithful we are to HIM. My advise to you move with elders to learn about this life.

alexialin:








Phew!
Mehn God bless u dear
That's so helpful, although my friends were the ones who said I should wear native, while my guy said I can wear any English decent attire, am looking at a knee length formal gown ,and just be myself and be calm.

He always jokes that they will whoop my assz if I misbehave there.
And am like whoop assz ke!

Is that how Benin people behave? He will then laugh hysterically as he looks on at me. Cos I feel they shouldn't be this archaic.
this is 21st century!

But with what uv explained now, u made it sound easy
Perfect then.

OK I will buy wine for the dad and very good handbag possibly add quality Ankara for the mum. She will love it.
I will keep the tips uv mentioned close to my heart.
I won't form one bit. So help me God.

You are a life saver dear . My mind Don rest small.. I will try my best.

Phew! This is one interesting holiday coming ahead

Thanks so much dear

Wow!

u won't have any problem with parents and if they are educated it will even be cooler.as long as u respectful the visit will go on fine.

farihafaheemah:

.... it obvious you don't have wisdom. Even our creator test us to know how faithful we are to HIM. My advise to you move with elders to learn about this life.

probably dat one dey get im experience from telemondo.its easy to know guys who watch too much telemondo..they tend to reason abstractly.

duchez:
Hello N'landers.

My friend just shared his story with me. I have advised him but I need your thoughts.

He met a lady around March this year and they became friends. He is an Accountant and works with a Federal Government Agency in Abuja. Along the line he asked her out and she insisted he finishes his ICAN before they can start dating.

Long story short, she later accepted to date him. Probably because he passed all but one of the exams in the Professional stage of ICAN. He recently invested some huge sum of money into a biz deal. He told me it was actually all of his savings and he would become a multi millionaire if the deal works out.

He decided to test this lady to find out if she will stick with him if the going ever gets tough (as a result of our insistence that the lady isn't really into him). And so he told her that the deal he was working on had failed and that he has become broke. He said he will like to marry her and try to sustain themselves on his current salary of about 180k pending when things become better but she replied that she can't marry someone who is earning 180k monthly. She feels it would make her drop from her standard of living as she wants to live inside the city of Abuja and not in the outskirts like Karu or Kubwa. Mind you, her parents live in one of these places and the guy is not even thinking of living in anywhere beyond these places like Nyanya/Mararaba.

This guy loves this girl so bad and is a very hardworking guy. He is hoping to get promoted when he completes his ICAN and is even looking at getting a better job in a bigger Government Agency or a Multinational company. He is so distraught at what the lady said. We have advised him to forget about her and move on, but he is considering opening up to the lady that what he said about the deal was just a test in the hope to make her re-consider him.

Please, were we wrong with our advice? Meanwhile, this guy's ex loves him like there is no tomorrow and she will gladly marry him even if he was earning 30k monthly but due to family pressure on him to marry a graduate and an Igbo lady, he broke up with her. Me thinks he can still persuade his parents to accept the lady.

If you were in our shoes, will you advice your friend differently?

Thanks for your comments. The lady earns around 180k but she mentioned that she spends around 300k when going shopping and she is scared she would no longer be able to do that if she marries him as she would have to contribute almost all her salary to maintaining the family.

Is your friend losing his mind about this? It's not even that hard, honestly. Your friend doesn't have to wait any longer. There are so many single ladies out there who want to get married and would accept your friend right away and wholeheartedly.

Obviously that lady is a high maintenance chick.

I know the mentality, relationships and emotions of these girls. The problem is this: She's probably not ready to marry your friend. She has other guys in the line.

Your friend should act like a man. He should simply move on and know that he can get someone better than this girl.

lefulefu:
u won't have any problem with parents and if they are educated it will even be cooler.as long as u respectful the visit will go on fine.

They are educated.

Thanks once again dear

OliveCynosure:

Wow, izz like you didn't read it well. Even her parents live in the suburbs so which standard is she reducing o

One question. Wouldn't you want to live a more comfortable life than your parents?

Wetin money go cause ehn

duchez:
Hello N'landers.

My friend just shared his story with me. I have advised him but I need your thoughts.

He met a lady around March this year and they became friends. He is an Accountant and works with a Federal Government Agency in Abuja. Along the line he asked her out and she insisted he finishes his ICAN before they can start dating.

Long story short, she later accepted to date him. Probably because he passed all but one of the exams in the Professional stage of ICAN. He recently invested some huge su me it was actually all of his savings and he would become a multi millionaire if the deal works out.

He decided to test this lady to find out if she will stick with him if the going ever gets tough (as a result of our insistence that the lady isn't really into him). And so he told her that the deal he was working on had failed and that he has become broke. He said he will like to marry her and try to sustain themselves on his current salary of about 180k pending when things become better but she replied that she can't marry someone who is earning 180k monthly. She feels it would make her drop from her standard of living as she wants to live inside the city of Abuja and not in the outskirts like Karu or Kubwa. Mind you, her parents live in one of these places and the guy is not even thinking of living in anywhere beyond these places like Nyanya/Mararaba.

This guy loves this girl so bad and is a very hardworking guy. He is hoping to get promoted when he completes his ICAN and is even looking at getting a better job in a bigger Government Agency or a Multinational company. He is so distraught at what the lady said. We have advised him to forget about her and move on, but he is considering opening up to the lady that what he said about the deal was just a test in the hope to make her re-consider him.

Please, were we wrong with our advice? Meanwhile, this guy's ex loves him like there is no tomorrow and she will gladly marry him even if he was earning 30k monthly but due to family pressure on him to marry a graduate and an Igbo lady, he broke up with her. Me thinks he can still persuade his parents to accept the lady.

If you were in our shoes, will you advice your friend differently?

Thanks for your comments. The lady earns around 180k but she mentioned that she spends around 300k when going shopping and she is scared she would no longer be able to do that if she marries him as she would have to contribute almost all her salary to maintaining the family.

Una don advice am finish na, its left for him to enter d lion's den wilfully or not.

Dat guy lacks common sense

ibkkk:
If i were in his shoes,I'LL GO BACK TO MY EX against all odds.

That thing called love shouldn't be based on material things alone.UNCONDITIONAL LOVE lasts a lifetime.

I mention you, you're a witch. so what


op, the guy you're talking abt should man up already. at this technology age no parent can choose or select who to marry for me. is my future not theirs

man's not hot

I don't even know why this should be an issue .... E no dey hard me to dump girl wey no get sense...