, It's not Good For A Man To Be Alone!, no be me talk am o!

Just became single recently and i love it. Been wanting it for a while now i finally get to be free of any promises or any compromises. I get to be by myself and FYI im enjoying this way much better. No need to keep on waiting for any guy to talk to me or have to figure out what he is thinking. Sucks on his part but im sorry i come first and if i want to be single i am its my life. Woohoo love being single again finally lol

uf4oma:

I am actually wondering how long ago this happened to you and why you would choose to still carry such baggage around. Do you enjoy it? You are not handling it well at all and the more you are in denial, the more entangled you will get. Bottom line: PLS GET OVER IT.

Hmm your wondering how long! Well lets just say 4 years ago since my eyes opened to the notion that love doesnt exist.

Secondly you asked why i choose to still carry this baggage! Well its a lovely baggage to carry especially when you see the fun in seeing your exes crying blood after a break up, the anger and anguish that follows for months after the break up, the loss of appetite, the need to be depressed that it's almost suicidal, the blatant hatred for the opposite sex after wards, the need to recoil back into your shell after the break up and the best of all, the need to realise true love doesnt exist only true lies

You also asked if i am enjoying it!

Am having a blast and enjoying every moment of it. The best part is feeding the innocent girl with lies and deception that you really love her. You take the extra pain to show how romantic you can get, shower her with love and affection, try and break into her inner core of suspicion and betrayal, making her feel loved and wanted , make her feel so hopelessly in love and make her not do without you for every given moment, the continous midnight calls and telling her sweet nonsense, making her friends adore and appreciate you and during sex make her feel extra loved and appreciated and when she begins to harbour those butterflies in her stomach and she's madly in love with you and dreams that she has finally met her soul mate, you then terminate it abruptly. You ignore her physically, emotionally and mentally. You leave her sitting on the kerb not knowing where to start from and her life gradually shifts into ruins all in the name of love.

Now tell me dear Ufoma, why should i say i am not enjoying myself! In my book that what i call friends with benefits and nothing more. Its none of my business if she falls madly in love with me because i entered into the relationship with one intention and she had other reasons. Why blame me for not thinking like her. At least no 2 minds are alike

You also said i am in denial and i'll get entangled.

Really! Maybe you should tell the girl that i just met 3 1/2 weeks ago that i intend to break up with on the 13th of february. ( I have always wanted to see how it feels like when you break up with someone on valentines day) May be when it happened to me i reacted stupidly then and i would love to see her own reaction too and compare notes Maybe she is the one in denial for falling for my sweet nonsense that i whisper in her ears daily  

BOTTOM LINE: Welcome to my world and i wont stop till i have satisfied myself. You can call me all the unprintable names you can conjure but it doesnt change anything that very soon the next target could be either you or your best friend or co-worker. I learnt the hard way and its only fair that i share my experiences. Its called TOUGH LOVE

GET OVER IT, The life of singledom is extremely exciting for me and am loving every moment of it  

the freedom is unquntifiable

Oh, dear lawyer, your case don pass me. I retire.

MY LAWYER, MY HERO " The only verdict is vengeance, a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain. "

Nothing, absolutely nothing at all, it is extremely horrible being single.

davidif:

Nothing, absolutely nothing at all, it is extremely horrible being single.

its not the end of the world just yet. I agree with you on the "nothing" part.

Being single, infact i'm young so i'll do the same both ways, different girls different days.the only thing with having a girl is that it's if ur in the mood for whatever(sex more) u get it soon unlike lookin around for girls.

What I enjoy most about being single? hey, I'm free, makes it easier to explore, which by the way can really be fun!!!

being single could be hard, but anything worse than being single is to be tied to someone u dont want to be with.

freedom to the max, do what you want, when you want and how you want to, no questions asked. though it gets quite lonely and boring every once in a while.

@Lawyer
Shit happens, accept it, get over it and move on. most of us have been terribly heartbroken, I personally know what it feels like, but you dont have to make others suffer for your mistakes. The law of Karma is very real what you sow you reap.

@LAWYER

What the girl did to you in School and what you are doing currently are slightly different by virtue of your gender, often the male pursues the female.
You chased the girl in School, as a matter of fact from your post, it did not seem like she was keen from the beginning, you 'toasted' her and did not allow her to leave you earlier than she finally did because you always sent people to beg her.

You manipulated her to stay in a relationship she did not want, at the end she had to leave you.

But now in your own case, these ladies you broke their hearts did not chase you, they did not force/pursue you into a relationship, you manipulated them into these relationships just for the purpose of dumping them?
What a pity, we all have questions to answer when we face our maker, which may be sooner than we think.

relationships are too damn boring, i'm terrified of commitments and i've got a mild case of claustrophobia!

I enjoy going out and coming in any time i want, no one questioning,
Spend my money no budgeting ladies needs, am alone,
No hot argument with any body, why do u do this?

all this has it on dis importance

NO companion
NO one to share your feelings with

Ability to do what you like without being questions or depend on others. though it's very good to sample people's opinion most especially when you are TOO. but being single, you have some SAY to yourself. total freedom and ability to select for future.

On one hand, being single enables u to be in full control of ur desires, be it canal or friendly, it gives u independence, you don't have to worry about another persons problems. All schedules, or decisions are strictly urs. there r no limits, no dependencies and every achievement or success, sadness or disappointments is for u alone. u dont hav to worry dat ur partner is out with friends late at night, u don't hav to worry wen ur friend told u wer ur partner was seen last nite. in fact, every opposite sex is an independent project. and if ur out just for sex, u can get it in hundred fold while being single.


But on the other hand, what is the meaning of life, if not to love and be loved? Love is the highest degree of feeling and if u haven't felt it, then u are in the lowest degree of happiness. Our emotions have been giving to us to harness, to explore and to nurture. A heartbreak is not a bad thing. it is a mentor, a door to a higher level. and of course, being with someone, is the only way u can learn the inevitable responsibility of Parenthood.

For those of us that like staying alone, it's so good to be single. U enjoy urself, Go out any time u like. Come back whenever it pleases u. Doesn't need to bother about cooking or caring about anybody welfare.

Lie alone, roll from one adge of the bed to another. No disturbances for sex. when u need to sleep, u sleep fine without any things crawing urbody at night. It's fun being single BUT FOR EVER.

EVERYTHING HAS TIME!!!

FREEDOM! FREEDOM!! FREEDOM!!! that's it about being single you do what you feel is best for you.no wondering if he's gonna like my hair-do or what im putting on and i dont have to form being nice to any of his friends i don't like.

I don't have to worry about making out with anyone or having high blood pressure that he forgot to call me on my important days like birthday, e.t.c.

Not having to worry about what to buy like this upcoming valentine's day and trying to impress his folks.

tete:

freedom to the max, do what you want, when you want and how you want to, no questions asked. though it gets quite lonely and boring every once in a while.

@Lawyer
Shit happens, accept it, get over it and move on. most of us have been terribly heartbroken, I personally know what it feels like, but you don't have to make others suffer for your mistakes. The law of Karma is very real what you sow you reap.

I dont understand what you mean when you say i dont have to make others suffer for my mistake. What mistake? When has the notion of falling in love been a mistake?

And as for Karma, i am Karma in this situation and i choose to unleash my vengeance to who ever i choose, just the way my ex played the role of Karma against me and made my life a miserable hell then. Dont worry, the more i dump them, the more my exes find other guys to play the role of karma on them too. Like i said its called Tough love

Shinatu:

@LAWYER

What the girl did to you in School and what you are doing currently are slightly different by virtue of your gender, often the male pursues the female.
You chased the girl in School, as a matter of fact from your post, it did not seem like she was keen from the beginning, you 'toasted' her and did not allow her to leave you earlier than she finally did because you always sent people to beg her.

You manipulated her to stay in a relationship she did not want, at the end she had to leave you.

But now in your own case, these ladies you broke their hearts did not chase you, they did not force/pursue you into a relationship, you manipulated them into these relationships just for the purpose of dumping them?
What a pity, we all have questions to answer when we face our maker, which may be sooner than we think.

Now let me break your caterwauls one by one from what you have just said:

1. When you toast a girl, she has a choice to refuse or accept your advances and if she accepts and ends up living in denial in that relationship while you the man or "toastor" believes all is well in the relationship, who then is the manipulator? Who then is the jezebel or the one with a dark heart? Who then is the one with no conscience and thrives on decieving the person that all is well and accepted your proposal in good faith? This effectively rubbishes your claims about who was manipulating who.

2. Secondly isnt the cardinal point of every relationship no matter how bad the needto communicate everytime there is a problem in a relationship? Maybe you believe that once the first argument or problem occurs in a relationship, both parties must part ways and move on. You probably think once there is an argument , the parties are no longer keen on the relationship. Well FYI then i was a staunch believer on working things out and believing time will heal wounds and make us more mature. But alas i learnt that it doesnt work that way and once you break up, you break up finally. No need to work things out. And your probably right and i will take a leaf from your book of wisdom now. Anytime i break up with a girl now and she askes me for the reason, i will just say i wasnt keen at the beginning and she was the one that manipulated me to enter the relationship by forcing me to continue!


Also the issue of gender that you brought up doesnt hold water also. A girl will never enter a relationship with a man unless you have something to offer her either financially or sexually. I know what girls want, so when ever i see my latest prey, i know when to flash money that they crave for or play the sensitive fool. I know all their secrets and fantasies, so it has nothing to do with gender. Women  only date for selfish reasons and what they can get and i take advantage of that selfishness and use it for my own good

 thanks for the advice, i have learnt a lot from you!  

3. As for the reference to our maker and answering about our deeds, i rather wait to defend myself in front of our maker when the time comes, but until then, i have more conquest to conquer at my own pleasure!

that girl possessed your body And your soul Now you shall obey her and be her slave!
First, you shall beg and grovel Then you shall do what she says!
That's right! Blind devotion! she is the evil in disguise Maybe all she wants is everything
You try to stay awake
she is living in your mind
she is commanding your life
You try to stay awake
In your cold dreams
You are alone
Then you lie, you cry,
You taste
Lost in this place, you don't have control
she can live inside your soul
Lost in this place, you don't have control
she can live inside your soul
her dark blood runs in your veins
And your body burns in hell
You try to stay awake
In your cold dreams
You are alone
Then you lie, you cry
You taste
Lost in this place, you don't have control
has she taken over my lawyer,my hero

OpeLovely:

I don't have to worry about making out with anyone

How the hell is making out considered a "worry"? Pretty much one of the BEST things about being in a relationship

worry kai? if that's considered a worry then you must have been with a pitiful person.

Also the issue of gender that you brought up doesnt hold water also. A girl will never enter a relationship with a man unless you have something to offer her either financially or sexually. I know what girls want, so when ever i see my latest prey, i know when to flash money that they crave for or play the sensitive fool. I know all their secrets and fantasies, so it has nothing to do with gender. Women only date for selfish reasons and what they can get and i take advantage of that selfishness and use it for my own good

@lawyer
You apparently don't know every girl.

@Lawyer

Obviously you made a mistake, you chose the wrong person to love . I believe we all choose who we love and I presume nobody made that choice for you. Wise up man before its too late life is too short and we don't get so many second chances.

@femwich

HMM, Femwich asked if i was still a slave to my ex? Well, i dunno when last i saw her facially or remotely remember how she looks like so i dont think i am a slave to her. Maybe your defination of slave means that i have decided to adopt her practices and ways of life as my own cardinal principle in life to handle relationships. In life, you have to take a stand either good or bad and in my own books, what she thought me then is very good to me and i choose to learn from her just the way the constitiution grants me the freedom of choice.

I dont give a Bleep about women any more and i dont care how they feel emotinally or pyscologically. All i want is to meet them, sleep with them and move on. And if after wards they call me the most callous person in the world, its their problem not mine. As i said earlier, i learnt from the best and i can only get better. Maybe after dumping them, these chicks could finally be slaves to me for years whenever they dump men in future.

@tete

Yes you were right when you said i chose the wrong person then. I was definately my fault for being foolishly wrong. But now that these girls choose me, is it my problem that they chose me wrongly? Its an experiment i am trying out and i am really enjoying myself these days. You really have no idea about the power that flows through your veins when your in control of someone's emotions and destiny especially when the heart is broken. At first the first girl i broke her heart made me feel very very bad, but as time went on, i saw what my ex saw in me when she broke up then in me. You look for all the flaws in her and despise what she stands for. You see the chick as a mascot for other jezebels and since you cant get to the jezebels personally, you then have to shoot the messenger, who in return will alert the jezebels that a serial dater is on the loose. You really cant understand the power i possess now especially as it deals with breaking a fragile heart. The smile and joy that comes with it, is immeasurable and you look back at the days when you were a hopeless romantic and lover and ask your self " How did i miss out from this fun during my younger years? How did i become such a weakling and fool then by believing that love exists? Any way its never too late to get back on track and am doing my best to catch up with the time lost. Once again, live with it, its called tough love and you can cry blood for all i care, life goes on , it isl a win win situation for me

@still water

You say i dont know every girl, lol, sister dear, you havent met me! Once i get pass the feeble attempt to say hello to me and you respond in the affirmative, your gone! It takes me approximately 3 days to profile what you like and dont like and i would work into your brains and heart gradually till you have no choice but to accept me into your life as a friend first and later on as a potential candidate for a blissful future. Trust me it has been working for me for quite a while now and except your from mars, i dont see you or any other chick covering under the disguise of "am a Town chick or Hard Girl" that would be too difficult to handle. Besides my preferences are the ones i suspect have broken other mens hearts before and parade themselves with that farcade of being impervious and impenetrable to mens advances.

P:s: I have a feeling my girlfriend reads naira land too. She recently said she read an article about men who are scared of valentines day blues and would try to break up the union before then. She tried to probe me on my tots and i hope she doesnt read into these things much because it would spoil my suprise i have in store for her on the 13th and that isnt going to make me happy. I always win

@lawyer what a sorry story I feel so sorry for you

Pepeye:

@lawyer what a sorry story I feel so sorry for you

Why are you sorry for me? You should feel sorrier for my conquests instead. They need your sympathies and pity right now, not me. Am having a blast here and feeling good.

@Lawyer

Its really sad and to think that there are a whole bunch of people out there both male and female who have your perception of life, tsk tsk tsk, really sad. I rest my case, at this piont the best I can do is pray for you and others like you that someday you'll see things differently.

@lawyer
to think of all the space u've taken on this particular thread to espouse your theory of 'do me i do u', i actually think urs is a cry for help. i don't know how u can be so cold and calculated. how can  the end of one relationship become the end of any form of real commitment for u? how long can u carry on this way? if everyone took it so bad then the world would be full of sadists like u. u sound as if u r the only guy a girl has ditched and as if that girl was ur entire world. if someone doesn't want u and u think u r good material, it is that person's loss not urs. u move on and believe again. please seek counselling. u desperately need it and ur heart is still bleeding for this girl after over 4 years of the end of the relationship. talk about being stuck in time. na waoh. as if heartache na new thing. na u first experience am. if u like come back come counter me i ready for u. if u be my brother, i go sound that ur head. nonsense.

being single is OK when u are under the age of 30, for a guy, being single is freedom and every other reasons quoted in all our replies. But for the ladies being single at a certain stage in life could drive one crazy.
Trust me. I know what am talking about.

who feels it knows it hurts. I feel it that's why i know.