How do guys on the forum feel about a lady approaching them, to get to know them better possibly to get into a relationship later?  Where I come from, some men hate it and might think of the woman as loose while others think it's about time ladies took matters into their own hands.  NL is a different world altogether so I am curious to know how you lot feel about this,

I know some of you are going to hail insults at me  bring it on    Kidding, let's keep it civil please!

It's not just a Nairaland thang. . .
Nigerian men [ 90% ] would label the Lady loose and make her a subject of discussion.
               [ 7%   ] wouldn't fail to constantly remind You, that You made the move. 
               [ 3%   ] might handle it in a Civil manner but then, what's 3% compared to 97%?

Having said that, I think I prefer the African way of doing this kinda thang.
Let the men make the move.

Makes sense Missy B, I think generally men prefer to do the hunting themselves and wouldn't want any prey bringing itself over, easy catch with all the connotations associated to it! HOWEVER, there is that 3% you talk about who would kill to have a girl approach them, not necessarily throwing herself at the man with titz hanging out and a skirt that barely covers the backside, this small percentage of men would not even judge the lady for making the first move, they would just let things flow as though they had approached the girl themselves, again, I could be wrong in my observation!

Then you get sleek girls who would make a move on a guy but still let him believe he initiated the whole thing and guy feels totally in control from the word go

personally i don't mind a Lady making the first move. if I'm also interested in her, i would not let her go that far, but if she eventually makes the first move, i'll try to make her understand i had intended to ask her out b4 she did so. Allowing her make the first move would have negative implications considering the fact that guys are usually more egocentric than women "guys easily let things like this get to their heads".

thats a lie missy b,

50% wud agree n use that woman to death, 20% wud calmly reject them, 20% wud appreciate their courage n stick wit them (for some reason, this is where i fall into), 10% wud remind them that they were the ones who asked them out,


there, alot better

3% you talk about who would kill to have a girl approach them, not necessarily throwing herself at the man with titz hanging out and a skirt that barely covers the backside,

^^^ 3% if used as a score, marks your fail so why fail when you can pass, cos na ashewo you go get if your observation is anything to go bye.
Bro if she likes something about you what ever it may be the eyes never lies, so if you see d green light you can make the crossing,

personally i don't mind a Lady making the first move. if I'm also interested in her, i would not let her go that far, but if she eventually makes the first move, i'll try to make her understand i had intended to ask her out b4 she did so. Allowing her make the first move would have negative implications considering the fact that guys are usually more egocentric than women "guys easily let things like this get to their heads".

[/quote]

True Yusuf, some guys would let their EGO get in the way, sadly!

[quote author=kpolli link=topic=441397.msg5995857#msg5995857 date=1272967908]
thats a lie missy b,

50% wud agree n use that woman to death, 20% wud calmly reject them, 20% wud appreciate their courage n stick wit them (for some reason, this is where i fall into), 10% wud remind them that they were the ones who asked them out,


there, alot better

I just think it would be nicer if the world had a lot more liberal men around!

well its sad that the average guy does not no a good deal even when it comes free, we have or issues, so we try to live wit it

U mean a gurl walking up 2a guy and askin 4a date?

U mean a gurl walking up 2a guy and askin 4a date?

Odunnu:

U mean a gurl walking up 2a guy and askin 4a date?

I think there are more subtle ways to do it like smiling at the guy when bumping into him at the cafeteria or greeting him when you walk past him and eventually he takes notice and suggests the two of you go out for a drink or something, It is said anyway that usually when a guy approaches a girl, she has already "rated" him as to whether he "qualifies" or not so when guy walks up and says "hello", the girl already knows what she is going to say to him, guys don't know this about us though 

Some ladies may take the blatant route like what you mentioned above, approach will differ!

[size=20pt]Kpolli is always rite!![/size]

Maybe I am having a blonde moment but what kpolli said I didn't understand, can someone break it down for me please

190 my greatest guy!!!!!!!!!!!

SA chick, well like some cars, it needs to be jump-started


PS i meant we have our issues

kpolli:

190 my greatest guy!!!!!!!!!!!

SA chick, well like some cars, it needs to be jump-started


PS i meant we have our issues

Don't mind me hey, still blonde, more so now that you have switched to male talk,   
But I get the part about your issues, still trying to figure you lot (men all over) out!

male talkcars??

For me in most cases i hate it when a gal does that cos most  atimes those gals are ones that i don't even notice or give a damn about. Sometimes i get annoyed with a gal that does so cos i was unprepared.

kpolli:

male talkcars??

Yeah, anyhoo, all good!

When I was in the University, there was this chic who asked me out on a date. Although, we did NOT eventually date, I loved her courage. She became a very close friend of mine (we're still friends up till now).

.NET

Nice one .NET In the end it is about the mind of the man being approached I guess!

In Chicago a couple of years back, I came out of this store and saw this amazingly good looking guy but I was too shy to even wink at him so I drove away but then realised I had nothing to lose so I turned back, found him still waiting for his friend in the car, we chatted and ended up setting a "date" for breakfast the next day, we ditched the breakfast idea in the car the next day and ended up having Burger King instead we hung out until I came back home, it was cool.

I approached him because I realised I had absolutely NOTHING to lose, that the worst he would say was NO, I never regretted that move

I appreciate it like food. this is uncommon, it takes a courageous lady to do this.

I meant my best female friend this way, though I am not dating her.

For the fact that she did not seduce me is a good reason why I will always appreciate her.

my mind set is, don't die in anticipation, go for what you want.

laprince:

I appreciate it like food. this is uncommon, it takes a courageous lady to do this.

I meant my best female friend this way, though I am not dating her.

For the fact that she did not seduce me is a good reason why I will always appreciate her.

my mind set is, don't die in anticipation, go for what you want.

True, as I said, it is about the mind of the guy being approached in the end, how he looks at the situation. It does not always become a romantic relationship as the two still have to get to know each other and see if they like one another enough to give it a go, same as if a guy approached a girl!

I dont mind i wud ride along'

Maximatic:

I dont mind i wud ride along'

By that do you mean you would take the relationship seriously it led to that or you would just "play"

I adore such girls. 'll never let go.

I'm yet to see one guy that's worth the trouble!

poster are u talkin men in general o nigerian men??

Ujujoan:

I'm yet to see one guy that's worth the trouble!

lol- u dis girl where abouts do u stay??

ayettymama:

poster are u talkin men in general o nigerian men??

Was talking about men in general but I knew I would get all sorts of varied responses on NL, if I am not mistaken, there are other men here who are not Nigerian so their input is welcome too,

Ujujoan:

I'm yet to see one guy that's worth the trouble!

The one I approached was definitely worth the trouble, no regrets at all

SA Goddess:

Was talking about men in general but I knew I would get all sorts of varied responses on NL, if I am not mistaken, there are other men here who are not Nigerian so their input is welcome too,
The one I approached was definitely worth the trouble, no regrets at all

Good for you then!

Missy B:

It's not just a Nairaland thang. . .
Nigerian men [ 90% ] would label the Lady loose and make her a subject of discussion.
               [ 7%   ] wouldn't fail to constantly remind You, that You made the move. 
               [ 3%   ] might handle it in a Civil manner but then, what's 3% compared to 97%?

Having said that, I think I prefer the African way of doing this kinda thang.
Let the men make the move.

But you've been chasing me up and down NL since 2008 innit?


@post

I'm a go-getter so Imma go get her.

I would definitely do it AGAIN if one came my way and seemed worthy, life is just too short and that ONE could be my life partner!

PS:  I am a firm believer in my signature, anything can happen if one opens themselves to the possibility!