₦airaland Forum

So because of the biko haram saga she and her husband relocated from the north to down south. Since they came, the husband has not been able to do any reasonable business. Poster has been doing pap business and groundnut business to make ends meet.

Poster's bro eventually bought a keke and presented it to poster's husband to make a living but poster's husband has been too lazy to use it efficiently. Poster has had to pay for her own appendix operation, her daughter's waec and recently changed to a teaching job where she slipped and broke her ankle. The operation was to cost n300k but since op couldn't afford it and his and didn't seem to care, op's people sent her to do it native with N50k. It was done badly and now poster still needs to do the surgery.

In all this the husband has been non-chalant and lazy, unable to work with the keke or start any other business.

Nairalanders, what should she do?

Kcinho:
what do you think about the getting wet easily?

Apart from what i posted previously, nothing else comes to mind. Would like to hear your viewpoint.

Nice Piece. if only all women were like the kind described above.

CrazyMan:
A
What do you guys think?

Why didn't you ask the husband?

.

Kcinho:
are those symptoms of UTI?

Apart from frequency, urgency burning pain etc , some ladies might experience sensations from inflammation of the urethra. This might be translated to the female as 'sweetie' (pidgin English) and persistent wetness. She should do a urinalysis and urine mcs to rule it out.

Ewuro4:
5minsmadness, I don't have much to say But I'm glad you understand what constitutes a Devalued individual in the society and how it could brutally affect and ruin your relationship with Friends, At church, and mostly your livelihood -Your Career. ( I understand people get away with it back home but here you're done)

The question remain; Are you willing to risk all that just to proof a useless point (Retaliate an assault), is it really worth it??

My viewpoint about western culture has always been that of a place bordering on total anarchy. Forget that they seem to be the greener grass now but is thier society and way of life especially concerning morals something to be emulated? Maybe that's a discussion for another thread.

If I happen to get married in the US,UK wherever, of course I'll take thier laws into consideration. I'll leave before I end up being frustrated enough to murdering the woman like many others have done before me. Its just heartbreaking for the kids who have to grow up in a dysfunctional home. And all that stats about kids from separated homes growing up well-adjusted is total bullsh1t.

Ewuro4:
Domestic violence.. The day you ( man or woman) raise your hand to hit your loved one , have it in mind that you're devalued in bits till you're completely Valuless.

Lie.
Inasmuch as we don't encourage violence of any form, sometimes some women beg for it with their actions and only become respectful when rendered a very valuable slap.

Devalued in various absolute instances . Is it really worth it??

Depends on the situation. If as a guy the woman has been taking advantage of you since day 1 knowing fully well you would 'never hit her' and she finally pushed you to your limit and even prevents you from leaving the house because 'leaving an argument is childish' then you finally snap...its the woman's fault and its totally worth it.

This is why exceeding patient is required when you are or have a hot tempered partner . As the matter of fact if you genuinely love someone, you'll have a second thought before hurting them.

True.
Most guys don't just start lashing out and beating their guys for no reason. Sure, there are monsters who turn their wives into punching bags for no reason soon after marriage, but I daresay they are in the vast minority. Some women don't know how to talk and keep pushing the limit till the man either becomes their pus.sy-whipped mumu slave or he finally asserts his authority by lashing out. By then the man would have been holding back for so long because he loves her and finally the dam breaks and the floodgates open.

And don't you dare talk about 'Why doesn't he just leave.' If you have ever invested in a long term relationship with children and a future together then you know its not as easy as the 'just leave' party makes it sound.

Authentic Love does NOT devalue any human being. It shouldn't.

True.
So don't devalue your partner by pushing him, by disrespecting him, by being verbally and emotionally abusive all because you know as a lady society will frown on him for beating you.

Please pick up your overnight bag and LEAVE an irrational partner till the storm is calm.

And leave your own house because of a cantankerous woman? Why not pack her bags and send her out till she cools down since she cant rein her tongue in long enough to have a decent conversation?

The last thread I opened about abuse the man walked out of the house and someone called him immature that he left the wife alone for the devil to bring thoughts into her mind. So if he leaves he is at fault. If he stays he is at fault. Haba.

Any man that beats his wife for no reason whatsoever should be locked up and the keys thrown away. However women have to learn that their tongues when used incorrectly sting worse than a scorpion's. They should control themselves so their husbands won't have to leave the house for them during an argument or worse hit out at them. Fair is fair.

mirenda:
A year ago, Used to be during ovulation before, now almost all the time.
No urination. But enough restlessness and dripping

Some ladies feel more 'h0rny' during their ovulation period. It is natural and a means of ensuring the need to mate and continue the species. However it is not meant to be felt all the time. Your case sounds like you might be having a urinary tract infection. Go to the lab and do a urinalysis and urine mcs.

In the meantime go to a supermarket and buy cranberry juice. It tastes somewhat like Ribena. Take it frequently until the lab results come out and proper medication is prescribed by a doctor. It will help.
All the best.

mirenda:
I don't like this feeling anymore. I get wet easily at certain periods and messed up. A friend of mine referred me to fish oil but it doesn't work.

Is there any way to control these urges other than sex?

1. When did it start? A month ago? years ago? Pls be specific.
2. Which periods are you referring to? Ovulation? Or certain occasions? Pls be specific.
3. Do the urges come with an itching sensation? Do you find that you urinate more frequently?

I know my moniker is funny. However right now I'm very very serious. Answer the questions and we can proceed.

SMALLPENIS:
SEE ME, 0/0

Kosigift:
Ohhh now I get but it's been fixed

But I asked b4 u fixed it na

Kosigift:
Hehehehehehe this is indeed 5minsmadness
Do I know you?

You said I should ask you anything, remember?

alutacontinua:
Why is everybody always coming to you for advice?
you be chief advisor?

God knows once I see 'slap her once', my brain just automatically shuts down. So, no comments

You'll be surprised the things I see

A prophet is never recognised in his own country

coogar:
if she's working & she intends to use her own money to buy a car, the hubby shouldn't stop her. it's her money & that's her personal choice as long as buying the car will not put a dent on her other responsibilities.

The issue is that the money she wants to use will cause strain on the family. Also the man feels if she acquires this she will still go on to ask for more things and it will become a habit.

its not about 2 TVs for some women.
i can categorically tell you this from experience. some women just want your attention for their own selfish interests.

i was in the living room, she said she wants to watch her show on a bigger TV. i went to the bedroom to continue watching my game....5 mins later, she came there to say she actually prefers the bedroom TV.

i went back to the living room & she came there again to say can't i see she's bored and she would rather talk? then came the usual question - choose between me or football to which i quietly told her to fück off, nicely.

There are two Tvs in their house. One in the parlour and one in the room. The one in the parlour is connected to dstv which is where the mam wanted to watch his program. He says it was live news not football.

crackhaus:
For the love of Buddha, any man living with a woman whether by marriage or cohabitation should endeavour having more than one TV set - this is common sense as there'll always be times when both will want to watch two different things.

The husband shouldn't have said the TV belongs to him, that was low - the wife on the other hand needs to chill.
They just bought a car recently and are living in a rented apartment, getting another car shouldn't even be top priority...

They have two TVs. The one in the parlour is a huge LED flat screen connected to cable while the one in the room is a box model.

nairalandbuzz:
Let me read first.....

Let me start by saying they are both at fault. Let me state the best way to block such....

Couples should NEVER allow their other partner to leave the house whenever anyone is annoyed. It brings in the devil to start sowing evil seeds... No matter how we fight, my wife will NEVER allow me go out... We MUST sort it out before anything.

The Wife should also note that TV time for men is like MakeUp time for ladies. Thank God for CandyCrush for making it easy for the wives to watch TV while the husbands get glued to their phones.

The guy should never have gotten the TV for her. That means you are committed to buying her own things for her here-comes the car.

The best scenario is this... The guy should NOT apologize again but you sit both of them down and give each of them like 30 mins to talk without the other party saying anything... then another 15 mins while they can interject. In that way, you will make sure that they fight in your presence with words and this will make you spend s bit of cash my brother....

Next, give the WIFE 70% of the cash for the TV she got (even though the husband got it), carry that TV and beg her not to allow the devil in their house again .

Tell each of them to apologize to each other... and also apologize on behalf of each one of them. Tell them to proceed by buying a land in the name Mr and Mrs Husband Wife Surname and remind them to let the door to Satan remain shut.

God bless you.

EDIT
Some will say that the best way is to leave the home because the more you stay in, the more you get furious... But I will tell you to stay while you ONLY think about your family not your wife alone. That should calm you down. And I will advice guys to start getting their minds ready for such and thus make an image readily available to calm themselves...

#Lobatan

Thanks for this your contribution.
@bold I don't understand, are u saying i should buy the TV from them? I get two tv for my house already o.

edwife:
I agree,she had it coming...

On the other hand if she has been working,and she can afford the car-i think it won't be a bad idea for her to purchase one without the husband putting in his money.

Then they should discuss on how both will purchase the land rather than bringing the roof down especially if she is out for it.
I don't see this going the husband's way,she has made up her mind long before now and she ain't backing down.

She wants to withdraw the money she contributes to the upkeep of the house, save it and use it to buy the car.

mutter:
You see once the words have fallen out of the mouth it is too late.

I have this problem with my husband too. After a hard days work I might just try to relax in front of the TV and he suddenly wants to watch football and that match is sooo important.
I told him to buy another TV. It just has a way of making one very angry when you are cut off half way through a film.
There was a case in Germany years back where a man threw his wife out of the window for switching of th V during world cup.

So not the man has made it clear to the woman that is his property and the woman knows now that she is at his mercy.

Let the man offer to change the documents of the new car to her name.
That is the best solution. If he offers to do so the wife might not even want it again.

What of she accepts it ?

Joel3:
shut you. U r not making sense. Come and Ban me...

Am the one not making sense ?

So my neighbor came to judge matter with me this early morning. I really felt for the guy cos I like the couple and the way they seem to relate outside. I decided to bring the matter here to see if I can possibly get some mature advice.

The man and his wife have been married for four years now and have two beautiful kids. Both husband and wife are working. I see the guy as the quiet but deep partner while the wife is more outgoing.
At the end of last month they had an argument that ended badly. Husband wanted to watch something on TV and wifey refused that she was watching her regular program. Husband explained that this was a one time thing and was happening live. Wife finally agreed with much grumbling which he didn't take kindly to. He told her he rarely watches TV that she shouldn't grumble so much. Simple enough but them things escalated with wife turning off the television and telling the husband that there was no way he was going to watch that program. He lost his temper and a scuffle ensued in which he slapped her. He said they were both shocked because he has never been physical with her throughout their 4yrs marriage. He left her alone in the house and drove off, came back close to midnight to find the kids asleep and the wife waiting on the couch. He apologised and she apologised too and he felt that was the end of it.

The next morning he was still feeling bad so he asked her jokingly if there was anything he could do to make up for it. The wife said that since he was shouting that the tv belonged to him then she wanted her own things too. She also wants to start buying properties in the house for herself so she wont be 'caught unawares'. He reassured her that he was angry at the time and didn't mean half of what he said and she said some mean things too. She still insisted on her own TV and finally the husband agreed.

The issue now is she is now asking for her own car. This couple just bought a Honda CRV last year Christmas but she is insisting that she wants a car she can call her own even though they bought the car as a family and i personally see them both driving it. He has just paid his house rent January and feels an extra car is an unnecessary liability. She wants to use her own savings to buy it while he covers the losses with his salary. Meanwhile they had an initial plan to buy land and start building their own house after buying the CRV.

He is not in support of the idea as he feels she doesn't need it and her being adamant about it is showing she plans on having more of her personal items so she can break off the marriage with ease if necessary. He said he is tired of apologising about that night bit just cannot afford the car right now, maybe in two years time.

I asked some more questions but this is the bulk of the matter. The guy was really looking sad even as he went to work this morning. I plan on talking to the wife later in the day as am close to both of them.

What do you guys think? Pls mature responses only biko.

Achilies:
[color=#006600][/color]

Something like that

You made me call my dad yesterday.
Thanks.
Though i still think he's an a**.

So my own questions are:

1. Why is this in family section?
2. How come he can post sex.ual stuff like this here and I cant? Or can I?
3. Who taught this op English? That person should have a coconut shoved up his ass.
4. Is this guy a mod? If no, can the mods ban him pls? If yes can he ban himself pls?
5 kosigift pls are u a virgin? Just asking.

Thank you.

itstpia8:
Cum, there's already a thread on this.

I KNOW THIS GUY!

Link to original thread pls.

Dalai Lama:

“Man surprised me most about humanity. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health.

And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future;

he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.”

pickabeau1:
I feel you

Lol

How far with zombieland na

Grand finale coming up!

paradises:
I was told everyone in the family has tried to correct him 'bt he will only turn deaf ears,and even insult his siblings!its not new to to them

So how come you missed it?

This topic already hit front page a few days ago.

Anyway. He is actually correct...if he were living in medieval times.

In those days (not in Africa, take note), it was considered a serious scandal for a wife to even show she was enjoying the sex, talk less of suggesting different sexual positions. A respectable and honourable man had sex with his wife only in the missionary position. If he used 'doggie' for instance on his wife, it was regarded that he viewed his wife as a common wh0re and the woman would go crying to her folk to ask the man what she did wrong. A certain king(I forget his name now) once deflowered his wife by taking her from behind. The woman was so insulted she attempted suicide. (history buffs help me out.)


So yeah, his message is accurate but rather off point...by about 500yrs.
Brb.

pickabeau1:
5minsmadness


This your post

Are u sure its not easier to just divorce

Do you know the procedure for divorce?
I do.

Trust me, my advice is easier. If it doesn't work out after 2 attempts then they can dive-orce.

@dera25 what about when the doctor inserts his fingers into your fiancees vag..iina to check for the baby's head during labour ?and he's going to be doing that every HOUR your wife is in labour! Isn't that rape? Maybe you should just deliver your darling fiancee by yourself at home

kaeycea:
And u think physiological changes that accompany pregnacy will leave ur private part attractive to d Dr...
It's even out of call to duty and selfless service to humanity will a Dr attempt to touch such a pregnancy-induced physiological distortion of ur private part at such a time

Choi!

@paradises.
Your husband's good character
...he is generous...
...he professes his love for you...
...he has stopped beating you...which means he can stop his verbal abuse too.

Your husband's bad character:
He is verbally abusive
He is a nag
He is easily irritated.


Your good character:
You help in the house financially
You are patient with him

Your bad character:
You provoke him when he nags. This makes him angrier and triggers his verbal abuse.

Plan:
Pick out a night when he is calm and surprise him with some good cooking. After he has eaten, surprise him further by fucking his brains out. Then when you two are basking in the after-effect, mention to him how his verbal abuse hurts you. Don't do it like fight. You already know you are in the right in this matter, no need to prove anything. Quietly let him know how it hurts and repeat some if the more painful words he has said to you. I bet you he will apologise. Tell him also that his nagging irritates the hell out of you and that is why you react and respond which in turn provokes him. Tell him how you would want him to address matters e.g mention something once instead of repeating it over and over again.

Also allow him to talk and say the things that annoy/irritate/provoke him. Allow him talk without interruption, no matter how silly his points are. This will also let him get some things off his chest and you might even be surprised to find that it is something else that been bugging him since.

When you two have said your piece, have sex with him again. I assure you he'll behave himself for the next six months.

P.S. This method should be repeated every six months for best results.