₦airaland Forum

It is better for man to divorce you. . .than for God to divorce you and make you a widow or widower.
It should only be used as a LAST resort. Never leave your wife or husband for another woman or man.
If you want to fool around. . .do JUST that and return to the safe harbour of the loving arms of your spouse.
A miserable married person is ALWAYS better off than a miserable divorced person.

It is better to remain single than to get married and get divorced.
Only after you leave your marriage. . . FOR reasons other than saving your life would you find out that there are other kinds of 'miseries'.

Divorced people, especially divorced Christians are more miserable than single or married people.



FINALLY. . . if you have children, divorce is NOT an option. You will never find peace if your children are not happy because of your 'itchy' thighs.

Hear ye. . .
Hear ye. . .

Maybe you should lynch your a-thiek-kuing politicians in your village to get you the right medical facilities and diagnostic centers so you do not blame everything on 'witchcraft' huh?

For all you know, it is the husband trying to kill her so he can marry another wife. . .who knows?

Could not understand a single sentence of this 'palava'. Meeeehn, Goodluck Jonathan has a lot of work to do I tellya!

It looks like cyber cafes have sprung up all over remote villages in Nigeria.

WTF?

Na today?
It will soon pass.
Somebarry wants your 'hinny' reeaaaaaaaal bad around here.
Who did you 'dare' reject?
Just 'befriend' somebarry up dia huh?
Your punishment might just be truncated. . .if you learn to 'schmooze' the right behind.
Or, you take the stiffer sentence. . . by being a renegade like some of us.

Either way, you will have to learn to sleep with yourself at night for the decisions you choose to make.

Never kiss an arse especially if it is filthier than yours.

Nice to see some things have not changed around here.

Hallelujah. . .new targets have been born for 'shooting' practice.

I have prayed to God so many times for forgiveness. I am just so scared that my brother in law could exposed my mistake.

You mean you can actually allow ANOTHER human being like yourself with one head. . .two hands and 2 legs to keep you in emotional blackmail for 1 minute, not to mention 5 years?

Please, let your brother-in-law go and publish it on YOUTUBE or "THE ENQUIRER" or "THE GLOBE" for all I care.
In fact, help him and make money ourra the notorious celebrity status. . . REMAIN UNSHAKABLE darling. Men impregnate their wives' mothers, sisters, aunts, mothers, grand-mothers and THEIR OWN daughters all over the world. . .who has killed them?
Shuuuuuuut happens please.

Sooooooooooooo bloooooooooooooody WHAT?

The harm has already been done.

You did not commit the first incestual crime in the history of the animal kingdom.
So what is the problem?


Let the chips and dips fall where they may please. . . life goes on.
People can only talk. . . then die talking. The children are here to stay.
Amen!

^^^^


Hmmmmm
Medicine after death.
Is it not better to find that out FIRST, before the 'fetus' arrives?
To make sure you reaaaaaaaally wanno buy or inherit this kind of 'wahala'.
The tin nor funny ataaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!!!
This is the 21st century.

Education first, before phocking!

So, when the poor fetus arrives. . . y'awwl don't try to 'terminate' it!

No English names please!

I nor dey for 'colonio-religious' mentality abeg!

Most-def nothing with 'Olu'. . .'Chi'. . .'Osa'. . . and all that 'God this' and 'God-that' rubbish in them.

Sooooooooooooo archaic and trite!

All those LOCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL names of 'virtuous' standings DID not appear on the birth certificates either.

Such annoying names like 'Faith'. . .'Hope'. . . 'Endurance'. . . 'Courage'. . . 'Chastity'. . . .'Joy'. . .'Peace'. . .'Fortitude'. . .

Not to mention those houseboy and housegirl names of perpertual sufferings and long-suffering and endless 'maltreament' from step fathers and mothers or indentured servitude like . . . 'Boniface'. . . 'Donatooose'. . . 'Ignatoose'. . . 'Aloyshoose'. . . .

Oh! Days of the week and months of the year. . . .buuuuuuuuuuush names!


Soinday. . .
Moinday. . .

NO "TARDED" BIBLICAL NAMES EITHER. . . Samuel. . .Moses. . . Joshua. . .Peter. . . Sarah. . . Deborah. . . RUBBBBBBBBBBBISH!!!!

Imitation is the best form of flattery.

Enjoy your [size=20pt] 'iconic' status with over 3000 posts on one website dear! [/size] Some polymonikering, cyber W-H-O-R-E-S are still jelos oooooh!

Never allow cyber riff-raffs to rattle ya!

If they come your way. . .please, blow 'em off!
The cowards quickly retreat when they find they have no 'black-mailable' caliber!

Gba be!

They can't do no 'shuuuut'!

Stand your graaaaaaand and deliver 'your' piss on their heads for baptism!

Abi you nor like 'fan-club' of olodos?

dayokanu:
You cant go wrong with Fstranger. He is the perfect man for you

Una fit just like key and ignition even more than rice and stew

Shioor!
I think so too.
I can't wait to have his baby.


[size=20pt]I LOVE SADO-MASOCHISTS! [/size]

dayokanu:
Blazay

See as they are ganging up on your boyfriend

Donyoooo just love 'gang' mentality especially from Nigerians? It never fails to amaze me.
Poor Jesus is in for another tough crucifixion tumble.

My "boyfriend" can fight for himself. . . .
He must be pretty popular around here.
Awwwwwwwwwwwww. . . .just when I was beginning to like him.

What a hilarious thread. . . JUST for one poster on NL?

Something good on my day off at last!

Thank God no know one knows where the dude/dudette lives.

"It" would have been dead by now.

Mu he he he he he

Ileke-Idi ooooooooooooooh. . . whai you dey?
Jisos of Ekiti wan quench for Nairaland oooooooooh!

WWJD?(What would Jesus do?)

The ONLY best way to describe how Nigerians interact on ANY Nigerian message board is this:

[size=20pt]"When KAKA(shytt-e) wants to exit the buttocks. . . it NEVER passes out alone. MESS or PISS MUST accompany it"![/size]

Such is the nature of the human mentality in general. . . Pathetic!

Question:
What should be done about this menace?

[size=20pt]Be banned Forever  51 (62.2%)[/size]

Ignored  11 (13.4%)
Am I overreacting?  20 (24.4%)
 
Total Votes: 82

There is pawa . . . .and there is SUPA PAWA!
The lord will always prepareth a table in the presence of my h-enemes!

Tell it to Gath!

Please, publish this in front of the gates of 'Ashkelon'!!!


Mu he he he he he

Just like with any school of thought, religion, culture or philosophy. . . ideologies are subject to interpretation.
Opinions they say are like arzzzzze-holes.
If you don't shiiiy-te with yours. . . you DIE of an illeus!

Feminism is just one of those schools of thought that reads like the "Bible" or "Quaran".
Depend on who is doing the reading or who is interpreting the message.

Beware of 'false' prophets!

^^^
Which shell?

The tin be like 20 naira kpomo!

The scrotum is even bigger than the damn penni-s!
What an insult.
No wonder the wife wan cut the 'baga' troway.
What an aggravation!

The pennn-s looks like it will be 'releasing' quick-quick too.

I have seen many of these kinds on Nigerian websites.

Mu he he he he he

sophy09:
@ blazay
Whao see lyrics analysis. I am sure one woman don catch you with another woman

God forbid!
Na toto I get abeg!
I don't sniff other pooohsies.
Never have. . .and never will.
Mine smells bad enough on any given night. . .washed or not.

I beg I dey go work.

OAM4J:
Oh Blazay or is it AJ? lol You no go kill someone o.

Ooooooooooooh!
Anyone is juuuuuuuuuuuus fine.
Now that some of us are NOT anonymous.
We dey kamkpeeeeeeeee!!!

Now we ALL know that some of us are NOT anonymous faceless pieces of trash-like posters without ANY socio-economic pedigree. . .WE not only talk the talk. . .but WALK IT too.


Who get dati kain pawa. . .make im come try like "US" without getting thrown out of his or her home like piece of trash.

Any one need any more research?

Mu he he he heeeeeeee!!!

If I had the HIV virus. . .I would not be thinking of dating.
What exactly is the source or cause of your 'emotional' distress?

I really do not care how you contracted the damn thing. Just take good care of yourself before you subtract from your blessings by cursing others.
Protect others too. Please!

Lady, abeg wash dati ya 'apple' keep am well well for cupboard. . . Adam nor wan chop am o! Chinekeeee!!!

10!
That's it!
No more!

Chei!
Chei!
Chei!

5 in the UK.
5 in the US.

9 dudes and I female.

I have seen and touched the 'nyashes' of two.  But they did not see or touch minezzzzzzz oooh.

[size=20pt]NO MORE I SAY![/size]


They gossip too much!

Most of them live fake lives too!

So-so lies on line! No poo for nyansh off line!

Mu he he he he he


Goooooooooooooosh. Time for work! 2 weeks straight and still looking fantastic!
2 days off? Do not disturb please!

Anoda wan don come again.
All these 'love' sick, puppy-crush stories of love and longing. . .without belonging!

Whether you like it or not, you are gonna be the 'other' woman or man before or after marriage.
It does not matter to me.
People are NOT monogamous by nature.
I am not.


What ever floats ya boat. . . FINE WITH MOI!

No stress abeg!

MOVE ON!

I wonder why ladies always want to be the other woman.

Like we ALL have the choice huh?

You only see me every Friday night at 9
Can?t imagine whatchu told her this time
You never take me to a public place
Worried that somebody might notice your face

Please, I only wanno see you on Friday nights too.
What has love got to do with the price of rice in Singapore?
Abi you hear say I dey find husband?
I pray my children never have to see you too.
I only want to see you after midnight. NOT IN PUBLIC. . . you are my 'private hoe' sir!
Abeg move jor, make I see road!
Abi you tink say you be my only 'boyfriend'?

Not many 'other' women out there can beat the "MRS" at home right? Just like not MANY men out there can beat the "MR" at home.
Please, hide me. . .make I hide you!
My oga go laugh me well well if im take eye see you.

First to the liquor store and then a motel
Call up your friends just to cover your trail
Not a word until the week goes by
You call me when you want some pie

In your phocking dreams I say!
Hide my face for wetin?
Welcome to the world of 'The Bold And Beautiful'. . . .please, stick to your juvenile world of 'The Young And Restless' hearts of desperation!
Don't call me, I don't call you! Shikena!
See you when I get 'Hot' again. Mwah!

If not a motel. . .is it on my matrimonial bed I would 'jack' up your arzzzze in the first place?
You MUST be ourrrrrrah your cotton-picking-phocking mind!

Why am I crying every night over you?
You're never gonna leave her

First of all, you have to make well over 5 times what I make per annum for me to even look in your direction huh?
The day or night you see me crying for either you or 'Argentina" huh? That is the day THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD will come to an end. For your Lord Jesus will have to come down to rapture your arzzzz first! You only have a deeeee-k for crying out loud. . . replaceable and re-chargeable. So what is the crying for? Do you pay my bills or my mortgage? Looky hia! Once I chop that your hot dog 2 or 3 times. . .it goes mighty staaaaaaaaaaale fast! See you in a year if you even leave me with fond memories or good bye forereeeeeeeva.
Which kain stoopid pennnn-is doooyooo think you gaat that ammo be crying at night or day for?Please, don't leave her o. I don't wanno be with your brooke arzzzzzzzzzze either!
Shioooooooooor!


Na your level be dat abeg!
I nor be desperate housewife or single!
Just "do" and carry dati ya paheint and your toothbrush out of my hotel room. . . go meet that your wife period!
Abeg wash your nyansh first, make ya wife nor smell my t*t* for ya mouth and kom kom below.
DON'T call my phone please!  Just send me 'e-mails' ONLY. . . NO TEXTS!
You live by MY rules only, or get lost in the gutter I picked you from.
You are not qualified in interfering with my matrimonial PARADISE! With your skanky SINGLE arzzze especially. I ONLY DATE MARRIED MEN.
No singles, no divorcees, NO WIDOWERS!
Married for at least 10 years with a LIVING wife and lovely CHILDREN! Period!!!

Finally, I woke up and smelt the coffee
I understand Why two women can?t share one man

Which kain dorty coffee you wan make I smell for sointin wey I don chop spit out for anoda woman to take scratch yeast from im nyansh eh kwah? I beg carry dati nonsense blokos-tin comot for my front make I see climate and vegetation. You tink say na ya own sweet pass?
Are two men not sharing one woman MOST of the time? Are two or more women NOT sharing ONE man in polygamy ALL the time in Africa?
Kini big deal? I dey share well-well oh. Who get teeth to chop kola make im chop!

I can?t be that other woman

Sorry dariling. . .you DO NOT have a choice. . . you are gonna be the OTHER woman before you be THE WOMAN.
Go ask yo mama.
I was one. . . I snatched someone else's husband.
If you can snatch him back, please feel free. You can have him back. I AM SOOOOO DONE. Thank you!


Fish full for h-inside river. . . just use and pass on to the next person please.

We are all re-cycled goods chopping each other's vomit!


Heeeeeey?
When was the last time ANY of YOU married a holy virgin "Mary" or a "St. Peter" huh?

Why don't you consult your pediatrician?
Are you sure you really had a baby?
How can you come to a public forum to ask dietary preferences for an INFANT?

Ah-ah?

Every child is different. . . you need to consult your pedi for the best diet for YOUR baby.

I am sure the baby has been feeding just right for the past 10 months. . .why are you asking for help now that the baby almost with a mouth full of teeth?

Disu NL na waya o!

Just like asking. . . how do I have sex after getting pregnant!


Hmmmmm!

Behold!
You sick giant of Africa.

I hope he did not sell his "London Black" cab before returning to Nigeria from self-exile o?

Horay!
The almighty thieving Brits finally help Nigerians procecute one of their criminals they could not get behind bars themselves!
Agbaya country at 50!

Ibori my man . . next time beware of your so-called friends called 'h-enemies'.
They turned you in so they could keep your loot forever.
Next time do not be so trusting. . .

Happy 14 years darling.
I will come and visit you again.

Please, type for yaselves!
It has not destroyed mine o!
It is even sweeeeeeter than "AYVA"!
Una nor dey taya to look one pen--s or t*t*?

I for don comot for disu marriage tay tay. . .if I nor fit 'sample'!
God forbid!

Ooooops! Time for work!

After giving her children with a 12-year absence, he should be gone for real.
What else is he good for?
Out of sight is out of mind.
I will be celebrating.
Will NOT take him back though.
He should stay with the 'strange' women.
Shioooooooooooor!!!!

The kids are not happy that their mother took the guy back but the woman believes truly it was a strange woman handy work.

If she has already taken him back, that is her business and her choice should be respected.
It is not the work of any strange woman at work.

It is the natural 'movement' of a pen-isss at work. Period!

bidemi12:
Obviously you dont know what you are talking about. You think say US and Naija be the same? where degree's mean nothing. You have an MBA in america and are driving cabs, yeah right!!!!

Many Nigerian MBA holders are driving cabs please. . . visit any Airport in the US.

There are soooooooo many of them on this Nairaland and OTHER Nigerian websites. . .posting away from their I-phones as they wait ALL day and ALL night in those long lines waiting for 5-5 dollar customers.

kandiikane:
I doubt nurses earnings can reach $200,000 per annum. I Hardly doubt is passing $100,000. Even for nurse with Phd. Maybe $72,000 max

Better than those MBA holders driving taxis all over the USA.
Some doctors do not even make that much.
Shioooooooor!

Nurse Salary Range

Advanced Practice Nursing Category 25th Percentile Median 75th Percentile

Certified Nurse Anesthetist (CRNA) $135,388 $145,216 $155,415

Certified Nurse Midwife $81,557 $89,337 $96,097

Clinical Nurse Specialist (CNS) $74,545 $80,975 $88,168
 
Nurse Practitioner (NP) and Family Nurse Practitioner (FNP)
$75,838 $82,590 $89,392

Advanced Practice Oncology Certified Nurse (OCN) $60,000 to $125,000*

*Source: Nurses for a Healthier Tomorrow (NHT), 2009

This is without doing any extra work o. Then you can imagine if you work like "jackie"!



Na beaaaaaaaaans?


http://money.cnn.com/2010/03/11/news/economy/health_care_doctor_incomes/index.htm

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Despite the growing shortage of family doctors in the United States, medical centers last year offered higher salaries and incentives to specialist nurses than to primary care doctors, according to an annual survey of physicians' salaries.

Primary care doctors were offered an average base salary of $173,000 in 2009 compared to an average base salary of $189,000 offered to certified nurse anesthetists, or CRNAs, according to the latest numbers from Merritt Hawkins & Associates, a physician recruiting and consulting firm.

Can you imagine thaaaaaaaaaaaat?

Please, we are not talking of those 'imported Mgbeke' nurses with palm oil oozing from their uniforms and under their armpits as deodorants abeagggi!

Nurses get category please!

CapnCrunch:
Kai! See Bad belle, kudos to her for doing her thing,it aint easy, the avg nurse makes 62-100k a year btw,clearly she thought hard before she mad her decision so we should respect it, ie Y stranger get off her nuts please

Serious bad belle o!


[size=20pt]You go gal!
Join the club I say![/size]

Any woman that has tasted this kind of MONEY in the fine-fine roads of America can NEVER move back to that "JUN-GO" of a place called Nigeria.

Tufiakwa!

To end up like "Dame Patience" or "Dora Akunyili" or what?

God forbid bad thing!

At least you don't have to queue up to be a 'darling-darling' moderator on any Nigerian forum.

E-badu belle and e-jolosi wor wor peeps!

Looks like one of those kokoye moderators have come again.

Mu he he he he

Do you know how many of these e-badu belle and e-jelosi peeps that have flunked out of Nursing school?
Only to come to Nairaland for full time 'be my valentine' phock me I phock you 'referee'?

Please, quit hating on us. . . 


Go and make your own 6 figures plus 3 mortgages. . . mwaaaaaah!

Hopefully, not through 'inspiring' adventures.
Mu he he he he

[size=20pt]YOU GO GAL!!!
JOIN THE CLUB. . . BE AN RN-JD!!! [/size]




Please, don't be like all those 'mgbeke', imported RN village wives ooooh!


Oh baby don test America. . . never to return to that buuuuuuuuush called Nigeria!

Amen!!!