₦airaland Forum

pocohantas:
If truly most men won't sleep with married women, there would have been no measures put in place by same men to ensure their wives don't cheat. From magun to swearing oaths in some cultures. Or is it the DNA cries? MILF?

I want to believe it is just to make women think they are undesirable as they age/marry. Which is only applicable to women who they have used gruesome-virtuousness to suck all her nectar or the ones that let go. If you are an attractive married woman. Preferably the one whose husband is flexing and giving peace of mind, men will approach you. Heavy men, because the younger ones won't have mind to put body.

I said that same thing On.egaì said about a month back and some were arguing with me. I laugh!!!

@ bold:

Nice to read.

Reminds me of a thread I opened talking about women keeping their nectar and some peeps twisted their knickers insisting I was talking about virginity.

I wish the OP was here to provide feedback on what she did.

Going back to the man seemed not to be an option for her.

I would never encourage sleeping with a married man
I would tilt towards masturbation (as creative as possible) or re-marriage depending on the particulars of the divorce.

folake4u:
Lol Buka, why are you laughing?

The way you said it is funny ni.

Generally, it is good to know the outcome you want per instance to determine the advise taken.

However, if there is one thing they get, it is that men need the carrot and stick approach to rate you. That's why our mother's/the church's wrong teaching on a mouse-like wife never works. Be a mouse, and you are seen as a beast of burden , 'loved' for the service you provide.

But again, I think it also applies to women.

folake4u:
Lol see .

I love listening to older women (female OGs) who have lived. Their advice is ALWAYS solid. I learn from their experiences in life.

@ bold:

Onegai:
Truth is, Nigeria is a poor country and you can't expect Poverty-Capital of the world to produce morally acceptable social mores.

So Marriage here is like War and Survival. Not Love.

Then you guys get to country that isn't in Survival mode and your spouse can actually afford a living. And you're not ready mentally for the mindset shift you need to go from War to Peace.

It's the same way someone brought up in Mushin will always be hungrier than someone brought up in Park view Estate. You can't blame them, Mushin was rough but now they have to adjust to Ikoyi.

And yes, some women do abuse the system abroad and make frivolous reports.

Stop fighting yourselves. You're now equals. Start thinking less like Lord-And-Servant and more like CEO-And-CFO. Both of you integral to each other's success.

And for those thinking marrying from another race is the solution, hoooo boyyyy!

Listen, Oyinbo people think they're God's gift to humanity. They read the Bible and believe that the chosen Israelites are Caucasian (hey, they're at the top of food chain racially).

Which means, no matter how much they love you, they will always look down on you.

And the day you forget yourself and presume to think you're on the same level as Tiffany, your pretty oyinbo wife, is the day she will remind you that you're a black monkey in her subconscious. She will love your little biracial babies yet remove them from you, lest they be tainted by your negritude.

Just go and ask your brothers married to them why they're they submissive spouse and are shooting videos all over TikTok, "My oyinbo wife tries Egusi soup for the first time!"


Think I'm lying? Go ask on Twitter what happened between Paul Graham and Nigerians. Man complained about using verbose language that sounds like AI, we challenged him and the superiority that flowed out of him, mehnnnn.

Every race has their wahala. But you're Black, which means that nobody respects you in the general scheme of things, save for another Black person. And then you now add in country and Ethnicity and you then see how disdainful other African countries are of you (they're only marrying you in the US/UK because Finance, Finance, Finance. Nigerians are usually the richest Africans subgroup in the diaspora).

Manage your expectations, Love your husband, love your wife. You're her CEO, she's your CFO. You both need to be on point to succeed.

Wow!

Happy new years!

Where have you been?

cyprus000:
This goes to accentuate how low you lot have degenerated, both home and abroad.

https://www.nairaland.com/8208811/uk-police-advise-nigerian-women

Don't confuse me with the women in your family.

SlavaUkraini:
Any woman that cannot live with her mother in law under one roof is not fit to be a wife...

Especially if the mother-in-law is not the troublesome type.

Such a woman can poison the husband.

Better divorce her and marry another and if you cannot see another that can tolerate your mother, ..... remain single.

There are a lot of clowns 🤡 on this thread.

NoToPile:
Very very hilarious.

Longest time.

Where is the source of the UK police warning Nigerian women not to report their husbands?

Very curious.

concho:
Reminds me of my 3-month relationship with Njideka . Was like an episode of *Game of Thrones*—minus the dragons, but with plenty of drama. A little war, a little adventure. Being my first relationship, I was out here trying to make it work, but I was also doing a PhD in jealousy and insecurity. Not because I didn’t trust her, but because, you know, I didn’t want another guy sampling my all-you-can-eat buffet.

One cold evening, I was walking back from my favorite football viewing center, dodging Oga Oke’s shop like a ninja because I still owed him for a beer I bought for my friend the night before. Just as I was about to give Mama Nkechi, the food vendor, a wave (bless her heart, her beans were like magic), I saw the love of my life, Njideka, holding hands with some random dude.

Now, I didn’t wait for an explanation. Nope. I unleashed a slap on her face with the confidence of a man who’d just conquered a kingdom. The guy took off faster than I could say "run," and Njideka stormed off in the opposite direction. Feeling like I’d just won a small war, I swaggered into my apartment, full of pride and misplaced victory.

Little did I know that her younger brother is a Soldier Yep, the one who had been fighting Boko Haram for five years. On getting to my apartment with Njideka , he beat me like I was a piñata at a birthday party. I guess he mistook me for Turji Bello or one of the bandits Sambisa . Bless the men in our compound who rescued me that night , bless my Caretaker whom I didn’t know was a retired soldier and thank God for giving me the opportunity to testify to this in person

My relationship with Njideka didn’t end that night , but I did learn how to control my anger that night

😃 😀 😄 😁 🤣 😂 😃 😀 😄 😁 🤣

I love this.

The fact that you understood the part you played in the ruined relationship.

The rants on this thread plenty sha

The men who can be sole providers do so with their full chest; they are not here postulating theories.

And a man who would disrespect you would whether you pay all the bills, don't pay any or split.

Tell the same ranting guys here to split chores because the wife split bills; they would suddenly remember that they are the 'head'

Namaster:
You can put her in a scrub and hang a stethoscope around her neck but a BIMBO will always be a bimbo.

A DOCTOR without commonsense!

Also, it's HILARIOUS that many women seem to think that men have a problem with being the SOLE provider.

Men DON'T!

What men have a problem with is being the sole provider for a woman that has seen MORE dicks than a 65-year old PROSTITUTE still in active service.

What men have problem with is being the sole provider to a woman who will talk to him and treat him like an EQUAL when it suits her and act like a damsel in distress when it suits het too.

What men have a problem with is expecting them to be the sole provider for someone that would NEVER do their laundry.

What men have a problem with is being the sole provider because of a vagina that someone FUCCKED with a Meatpie and Bigi Cola.

Problem is women want men to stick to the ancient masculine tradition of being a PROVIDER without satisfying the ancient feminine traditions of being sexually pure, submissive and generally helpful.

It's a kind of quid pro quo. But women want the QUID without providing the QUO.

Kolework!

If a man is capable of being a sole provider, he won't rant on NL; he would list the qualities of the woman he finds worthy and get her.

mmadu4:
THEN DONT GIVE BIRTH . simple

Now, this is hilarious 😂 😃 😄 😁 🤣

You must be a clown 🤡

We4all:
Men don't seek ways to attain financial freedom when their wives broke shame them, but are quick to run to their side chics when the same women nag because it's convenient. What a lame excuse!

Righteousness2:
He is not thrilled about being a Father but he was thrilled to Fornicate.

He must be forced to be thrilled .

@bold:

Warris this

RenaissanceGuy:
There's no international law that prescribes democracy as the only form of government. So, meaning a police officer can even carry out a coup and become his country's head of state. So, there's nothing ECOWAS can legally do to Burkina Faso, Niger and Mali.

@your signature:

So what happened?

Omoluabi16:
I thought it was conspiracy theories, but this bill gates is actually a devil.

You have a point though.

If Bill Gates, whom we expect to be very intelligent has reviewed Nigeria's economic woes and think we have a low tax problem, he is either a very lucky foolish man or a devil.

Sighs!

Like Government Like Citizens

balaclava:
Yes they do, 150k is small na, even 200k-500k and more dey but

1. E fit be say na your salary as the owner of the business sha or
2. You sabi person wey sabi person wey still come sabi persons for organisations wey dey give the job or
3. You fit bribe or sleep your way into the jobs or
4. When God/The Universe/Supreme being say na your time.

Your post is the reason why 'high paying' jobs might be elusive to you.

Kaczynski:
If you get connect , that's only when you get a high paying job

even in tech , nepotism helps a lot

Really?

CodeTemplar:
It may take some civil servants 100 years to afford a hajj slot. The assumption for elective offices is that majority of the people are making the best choice. I cant fault an SSCE holder finding himself in HoR or Senate.
The comparison is a lil bit off. How many professors have truly advanced the body of knowledge they are suppose to? Ask them to look inwards for extra revenue and you start hearing about pure water and bread factories as ideas.

Wait o!

Assuming a senator and prof in Nigeria are both incompetent, you think a senator displays more competence in his role than a professor?

Sonnobax15:
Good day Nairalanders.....Hope everyone of you here is fine and doing just great?

Well, there's a situation my siblings and I have found ourselves in presently.......It's been 19 years since we lost our mom and those years were really hectic years for us,due to the circumstances surrounding her death because she was murdered................But somehow, God came to our rescue and we've all grown now

Before my mom's death,she had a sister who was her only blood sister, tho they had other step siblings...... Honestly,as I kid,I remembered how many times my mom tried to resolve the dispute between she and her only blood sister but all were to no avail.....She(my aunt) was hell-bent on the fact that she'd rather die than to settle things up with my mom.......Even in her death bed,i remember how my elder sister went to inform my aunt about our mom's situation and everything that led to what happened to her,but she gave deaf ears and even chased my sister away.....

I was only a little boy then,but I remembered every single thing that transpired then ..

Now here's the problem.........My aunt has been on our necks, begging us to forgive her......There was a time we were invited to our maternal home for a family meeting,and my aunt happened to be around.....She knelt and was weeping and begging us to forgive her....... Personally, I'm a soft-hearted person and I've toured my heart to see if I could forgive her and I think I'm about to let bygones be bygones.......But my other siblings especially my elder sister has sworn never to forgive her . Tho I've tried to talk to my sister but she has vehemently refused never to forgive her .....My other uncles have summoned another meeting but my sister has vowed to ignore their calls.......

Should my sister be blamed for finding it hard to find a place in her heart to forgive my Aunt, considering the fact that she's a Christian?

Or make everybody just mind him business just like we've been doing over the years?

The matter just tire me I swear but it's all good tho..

If your sister is a Christian, then she has to forgive her I.e. let go of any bitterness or bile in her heart.

It doesn't mean she should become friends with her either.

SpaceX:
This explain why new diseases keep coming out this days.

New diseases?

From something that is age long and probably phasing out?

10% in 3 - 5 yes?

That's quite optimistic!

I thought they would have finished by then

pocohantas:
The maids I have seen who are dressed and fed shabbily are minors. Which doesn't count here. I don't encourage use of minors and they are not part of my sample size. Everyone I know with a grown maid bears their living expenses. Strangely many of them want to come live with you. Once they sense you are a fair human and can provide a good level of comfort.

Lol! Which maid works round the clock?
Shey she go dey do security while others sleep?

Thanks for the clause to minimum wage. I totally forgot about that.

@bold:

Who no like better thing?

Imagine saving about 90% of your salary monthly because you are living comfortably on someone else and have access to lifestyle you ordinarily wouldn't

N30k - N50k is ok for a live-in maid of a middle class family.

You practically bear the person's living expenses ( I don't mean those who dress/feed/house their maids shabbily or think they are not good enough to eat the meals cooked).

In addition, a maid ideally shouldn't work 'around the clock'. Work in sync with madam and close for the day when madam retires or you are done with your chores. And in the afternoon, there is ample time to rest/sleep.

He/she should also have time off like a weekend in a quarter to go home etc. I don't know how that would work if home is very far. That can be converted to hangouts etc..

@minimum wage: there is a clause that exempt employers from paying minimum wage if they are employing less than 25 persons or on a part-time basis etc. The more disposable income the employer has, the more they are able to pay their domestic staff (hopefully)

P.S.: I am talking of reasonable/morally sound peeps; I know a lot of maids have it different.

Jejesamzy:
Good day everyone.

I need your advice on this.

Please, this is very serious to me and I beg you to not troll


I am a graduate and finished school in 2019. I am the only son my parents had and I am 25 years old.

In 2020, I started programing and by GOD'S grace I now have a job and doing quite well. I foot 90% of my family's bills and I am really happy doing it. But currently my parents are telling me to show them the person I am dating so I can marry her off and start my own family. The problem here is that my parent wants someone that is a graduate or at least in school but the girl I am dating doesn't even have a good waec or neco result.

I met this girl in 2021 when I was doing my NYSC, I did some accessment to find out that she is actually a good girl from a good family and so I asked her to be my girlfriend. Meanwhile, she had just finished writing her waec (Mind you she was 20 and I was 23 then) and my intention was to date her until she became 25 and I, 28 years old so that she will be in school or almost completing school by then before we get married. Unfortunately, when we checked her waec and neco result in 2021, she had failed woefully. So, we started dating and I started to help her with things in life such as paying for a single room for her in 2022 so that she can atleast stay away from the village and catering for her entirely. So, in 2023 I had my major breakthrough in my programming work and decided to help her learn a skill (Wig making) which she learnt but I was still unsure about the whole marriage thing since she failed her exams. So, early this year I registered her in a school known to pass waec but today, I found out that her result is showing "held".

My parents won't allow me to marry her and I already told her (in 2023) that I would break up with her if she failed her exam (the one I will register her to write in 2024) in a bid to get her to be more serious with the preparations but she wasn't really doing any preparations because she had big faith in the school.

Also, her parents don't support her financially, and I have been footing her bills since December 2022 and I already asked her for a breakup like 5 times since then on the basis that her parents don't support her but I keep on allowing her back because she hasn't really done anything bad to me (she always begged and almost doing crazy things to herself like literally starving for days or trying to kill herself) (this scares me about he)

So, now I don't know what to do about her, if I should break up with her because she can't pass her waec or let alone be in school... What should I do?

Here is a chat between myself and her early 2024:

Let's take your parents aside.

What is your dream for a future spouse? Where do you see yourself, where do you see her beside you? What are the qualities in a woman important to you? You need to be true and sure of yourself.

Division due to tribe and religion is only at the bottom.

At the top, as far as interests are aligned, they are united.

Shettima bagged a beautiful woman.

And madam Bianca needs to bottle her beauty secrets.

IMO, since the wife knew she would post it online, she should made the husband wear a light T-shirt/ singlet/Tank top.

Nice video, lovely couple.

NICOGRAVITY:
In all you do, do EVERYTHING possible to keep the love and fire of your marriage going.
No sacrifice is too much for your marriage to last forever.
This are little things that matters and builds bonding.
Love sweet oooooo.

On a second thought, the guy don reason the £200 as its over 420k in Nigeria 🇳🇬 Naira.
Kai, 9ja man.

@bold:

10000% correct!

👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏

Atuero:
£200xN2200=440,000 naira saved.

Do they spend Naira in the UK?