₦airaland Forum

Rockyfancino:
I was wondering if you all out there can become a successful millionaire, if you had N40,000 as a capital. Most people will say 1million isn't enough to start anything, but a real business person had wild ideas. I want to know what your ideas are in your head. Please share what you can do with 40k.

Thats Ogwuego tinsss na

wirinet:
I dont know about the calling obasanjo a tout issue, but to me the biggest mistake Jonathan did was losing Amaechi. Amaechi would have been the bridge between the SS and SE, he was the most experience politician of the governors, he is bold and stubborn. He even fought with OBJ and won. But the president instead decided to trust Akpabio and Wike. If Amaechi was still with Jonathan, things would have been pretty difficult for APC. One Amaechi equals ten Akpabios and Wike added together.

Buhari saw the importance of Amaechi, that was why he quickly appointed him the director of his campaign organization.

If you check my comments when the feud started, i did not believe Jonathan would let Amaechi go. IBB is very right in this regard.

My very exact thoughts losing amaechi would go down in history as his biggest mistake. Some people you keep at all costs when your political interests align. Eg us and Saudi Arabia

My wife and the kids. My WIFE and the kids.
Na she be the house CEO, if she is not working because of the family even more self.
What else is in this life, kids will grow get married and move on, na me and her go dey house.

manutdadex:
jst speak for ursel dude...God is still working in our midst if u like no beliv..there are miracles all around us

A miracle was needed in Baga a few days ago where was he?

Oh I forgot the miracles are for private jets and bling bling for the Daddy G.O

Miracles do not exist when will people learn. Smh.

Your mother is a real person, shouldnt be an issue to make a joke of any idea - Religious Ideas inclusive.

Who are all these ones beefing us now? We should start turning down our first fruits offering now? For what? After counting my first fruits offering next week sunday



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scSZ7EGUcrU

LewsTherin:
I feel so sad whenever I come to this thread. I feel sad seeing people suffer in a union God designed to be a reflection of His relationship with us. I feel much worse when I remember that a marriage is only salvageable when BOTH parties choose to save it.

No matter what amount of excellent advice we give distraught partners here, if both of them do not work at fixing their relationship, it's pretty much moot.

Be strong people. There is always hope. Always.

P.s. that machete thingy was gangstar!

No need to feel sad, a lot of what goes on here is 1D, one party complaining. You don't get to hear from the other side, if a woman comes here to complain that her husband has started coming back home late these days, he is acting dodgy, I checked his phone I saw this and I saw that ;
What a wicked man!
He wants to give you HIV o!

Nothing like a cheating story to whip people into a frenzy.

Self righteousness can sweet people sha, even those wey dey type from their gf tecno

One of the hardest battles we fight is between what we know and what we feel.

Rowzay,
I think you need to first need to pick yourself up psychologically. You also need to find a way to really get his attention, I don't know you so I cannot say what sort of support system you have. You both however need to get into counseling if you cannot sort this out yourselves. There's really no need to snoop, it will not stop him from calling and deleting. The shouting match might be good to get his attention but to ultimately solve the issue it is important to know why and how this started, is there any girl in particular or many girls? This is important because sometimes this could have started from something small then now spiraled to something that he might be struggling to control.
You see the thing with discipline is once you compromise it takes a lot more effort to rein yourself in than before you fall.
I wish you luck.

Which way for this country self

wirinet:
It is not only in politics, this also happens in Business. The CEO's of the biggest companies in Nigeria and indeed the world almost always has less academic qualifications than his deputies and staff. Dangote without a Bachelors degree has many PHD holders as drivers. Even Warren Buffet without a high school certificate has many professors on his pay roll.

If you study history, you will realize that the people who had the most significant effect in societies had no outstanding academic qualification.

Leader ship qualities is inate, it cannot be taught at a university

Spot on, I will be stealing this line somewhere thanks.

These numbered lists on this website have become a serious bore.

Hi guys,

Is there anyone here who can give me a quick overview of maintenance costs of a mercedes E 350 say 2010-2012 years. I would be glad if anyone can point to a page on this thread if it has been dealt with before. Any owners out there should kindly let me know.

Thanks.

You leave your parents, her parents , your siblings all the people close to you and come to seek help on Nairaland abi?


SMH Shuldren of nowadays...


*walks away shaking head*

The way I manage to miss this kain threads sha.
This adult education is taking a toll on me

I always wonder if it is right to instill in your children from an appropriate age what it is they should be looking out for in a man/woman before they even think of starting to date. I am a firm proponent of use your head before your heart takes control. Family background, personality traits......cos today the issue might be tribe with our parents, tomorrow with us something else.

I think Hollywood and the west has the March on what it takes. It seems irrelevant but from when that little girl reads Snow White and all the happily ever after, the narrative begins to get shaped. Fall in love, manage what comes with it.

prissyluv:
The reasons they ve given me so far is that benin is far and that we dont have the same culture-eg marriage and burial rites,language etc.
Let me not say this points are not valid but do they supercede my happiness?
Ok,if i let this guy go and marry an Anambra man and we live outside Nigeria,how often will they be seeing me? At times,the in-laws relationship you think might be there if you marry from the same state may only exist in passing. I just tire really. My people is just being mean without at least seeing this guy.

I can feel your passion about this, I would not say the issue of tribe is trivial. It does take two willing families like I said.
Let me give you an instance, there are places where you get married from where the woman's body has to be returned to her village after she dies. So in essence she is being loaned to where she is getting married to, I have seen traditional marriages stall way into the night because of this very issue. There are also certain places in Nigeria that have peculiar culture, for instance if your brother is to get married to a girl outside the east she has to understand what going back home to the village every christmas means - if the girl however grew up in a tribe that believes witches and wizards abound in the village you kinda get a picture of where your parents are coming from etc etc. Some tribes in Nigeria are prone to polygamous homes, in some you find where women have children for different men.Sometimes it is just general, his immediate family or your immediate family might not really practice some of these things. You must however realize that your parents perception of things is their reality.

I am of the strong opinion that while most of these things hold true, they do not hold as potent a force as they used to during our parents time. Primarily because most of us were brought up outside the village and as such these ties are not as strong. How do you go about fixing this, well you have to somehow show that you have had enough experience with this guy to understand what you think it would takes to be married to a Benin person (your partner in particular). In influencing people you have to choose an effective method, for instance your mother would probably be more inclined to hearing things like this is my happiness, this is the only person I can be happy with.......As a man I may not be moved by stuff like that, he might like to first know the immediate bio of the guy,
Is he a graduate?
What does he do now?
What type of person he is towards making future plans?
What type of home is he from, Wealthy? Royal? Polygamous ? Broken home? How do you think this has affected him? What do you both see as what marriage entails?
Does he have any burden? First son, has to pay school fees?

The summary of what I am saying is that you have as much as you can thought of, inquired and understood what it takes from your own small knowledge and you see that this can work. Then add that ultimately your love for each other would make sure that in the areas that would be difficult you would be able to get through it.


Finally, there are many people out there who go against consent and get married any how. Sometimes it works, sometimes it does not. It depends on your background, his background, your risk aversion etc etc. I wish you the best.


Cheers.

Prissyluv - Love is Never Enough.

Parental Consent is key as long as you live in Africa. Most times the things our parents understand we probably dont. Sometimes it has stemmed from history, certain people do not marry well from other places due to cultural differences. Its not that it is impossible to work out, it just probably harder. It is imperative to try your best to understand where their real fears lie, talk to more receptive people.....maybe older uncles in a bid to understand where your dad is coming from. That would make you decide on a better course of action.

I had a close friend of mine explain the Osu thing to me, and while I could not wrap my head around it. This was the reality that they lived, so your first task is to actually break down what the opposition to the guy is. Is it cultural, is it financial or is it a combination of many factors. Until you know exactly why you might not be able to get a good course of action.


So try to be less emotional and go about finding out the real reasons.

All this nonsense will not feed us
If they like let the grand mother come out first weant light and security.

Happy New year!

Lashawn,
Compliments of the season. Hope mummy daddy sisters brothers are fine.

Now pull yourself da f**k together.


I don't always use french.

In as much as I want to dismiss this outright as an emotional outburst that has no place in a mature marriage, this perception of things is your reality so it has to be entertained.


Why does everybody have to like you ? Is that an attitude to go through life by ? A whole evening happened and the highlight for you is that an extended uncle called you and said you had to love their family more and call more often? Jeeez that's really what shattered everything for you? Tarnished everything irrevocably? Pull yourself together!

Marriage 101.1 learn to manage your expectations as your level of influence wanes.

Everybody cannot like you it is has simple as that, it seems trivial to say but heck you need to hear it. Have you done right by yourself and by your husband ? Does he like it , yes? Has he complained you don't call his relatives?
So if your husband understands where you are from and what you are about you EXPECT an extended uncle who is probably set in his 60 's ways to understand what Lashawn is all about?



Then you get pearls of wisdom from someone else who has been there and is living it, 'schedule calls for them ' if that's what they like. Since your interest is that they like you that should not be hard no?


Am not one to be quick to judge but my dear you need to grow up in the space that is called marriage.
Which one even consign me self.

Stegomiah:
Different strokes for different folks!

To you the sopranos may be the best, but I think you must be high or tipsy, ridiculing breaking bad in such manner.

Breaking bad for me is the greatest series of all times.

Rating wise, award wise, acting wise.....name it!

I love the sopranos though, I consider it as one of the best but not the best, asides breaking bad, I rate the wire, Got...ahead of it

Not high or tipsy it was intentional. Let's leave the wire out of this that was another classic.

I really cannot get a hang of what was awesome about breaking bad bros. To me it's was an average joe production, not so bad ........but no way can it share the hall of fame with series like the sopranos or the wire. That's what we should be discussing.......


Care to share why you think breaking bad is awesome?

My year would not be complete without paying tribute to this series. I watched it again for the third time this year and I could not help but still marvel at such great acting.

The Sopranos has been regarded by some as the greatest television series of all time. The series also won a multitude of awards, including Peabody Awards for its first two seasons, twenty-one Emmy Awards and five Golden Globe Awards. A staple of 2000s American popular culture, the series has been the subject of critical analysis, controversy, and parody, and has spawned books, a video game, high-charting soundtrack albums, and a large amount of assorted merchandise. Several members of the show's cast and crew who were previously largely unknown to the public have had successful careers after The Sopranos. In 2013, the Writers Guild of America named The Sopranos the best-written TV series of all time, while TV Guide ranked it the best television series of all time.

If you love tv and acting and all that good stuff, and you still have not seen this series. Turn of that nikita today, break/delete anything that has to do with Olivia pope........toss your breaking bad collection ( yes I said it! ) ....Spend the rest days of this year soaking up what acting really is all about.


[url
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9oY7zpan18][/url]

Frosbel ke
Lemme log off and on biko.


But just incase this is a dream, you can list the books you read. It would help those who are trying to make up their minds get some more closure we veterans can then add to archive. E get one of my friend wey I don dey suspect since, the dude is way to smart for himself to be singing kumbaya. He don dey meet me for night like nico nico.

Just look at all y'all telling this guy to kill his basic human urge. God was smart enough to give him the urge the tells him not to use it.
Lwkmd please carry your runs girl o, even pastor is firing down with choir mistress.

RoyalRoy:
Hmmmm.... Why is it only women who complain about their In-laws?
Rarely do we hear men going on and on calling their in laws all sort of names.
Can we conclude women are a bit more emotional to issues than men?
Or can we say men generally just get along easily with "other people" than women?
Or maybe women have all just concluded their in laws will be from "devilsville" even before they meet?
I do not just understand this issue.

The beauty of marriage eh, if you say they are being emotional you don cause wahala be that o! Cos they will tell you emotionally how it is very painful that they greeted and the tone of voice that was used to answer was not good enough. Beef don follow be that LOL.

Quick One:
Man living under same roof with womans family: The bobo go dey baff comot house everyday, him fit no even send how things dey happen as long as madam never quarrel with her people peace dey for house.
Woman living with mans family under same roof: Everyday na wahala, your people looked at me like this. Your sister ate and did not wash plate, your sister put her hand in my pot......the man go settle issue belleful.


The moral of the story: As long as madam no like wetin dey happen, she no like am. No amount of explaining will change it.

An expand button to cut short a quoted post that exceeds a certain amount of words.

Madampinkolo:
NOw,the bolded is a real question for the gods...I don't know what i'd do in such a situation..
Wickedness,greed,meanness cuts across all classes..Rich,middle class ,poor.
I agree with everything you wrote..start early to instill the values and somehow encourage them to interact with those with the same values who agree!!
In the ideal world,this would happen.However,emotions and false butterflies will keep leading people into traps.I can't say it enough,look carefully before committing.
I guess there's no true solution in the end cos not everyone will be brought up well,not everyone is in a happy marriage so the cycle must continue

"Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference."

Madampinkolo,

Your parents did an amazing job, however there are many other parents that either by nature or lack of exposure or even being willing to accept to do things differently end up leaving their kids with these "deficiencies". I stress this point because a Marriage is usually between two people from different backgrounds, while one of them might have found it easier to let go the other might not and as long as that person is a partner in the marriage then it would not all be smooth sailing.

Your first paragraph is spot on, it is a discussion that should be held between two serious individuals that are about to get hitched. What I need to add to is, does the other partner agree to these values? I would even go a step further to say it is a conversation that should be held with parents and their maturing teenage kids. To make them realize the importance family values in choosing who their partners would be. Some women just have a domineering personality, has nothing to do with being in an unhappy marriage. The world revolves around them. My own is the onus is on you to know before you enter, once you are inside seat up and deal with it.

You know, I still worry about the challenges we would be forced to accept from our kids as the world around us changes so fast. I think also that we are lucky to understand that we might have to let go at some point. For instance how would I handle it if my daughter comes home with someone who I feel is a bad match for her? Would it be as easy as I would let go and let her be? ......Question for the Gods.

I dee nor want to Shoook mouth inside this MIL talk. The women who complain turn out to be mothers, they give birth to children and then also pass through the struggle of letting their children be, its a very funny cycle.

Me thinks this is what one should look out for before plunging into a marriage, if relationships were engineering it would be one of those safety critical things that should be near the very top of your list. People grow under different circumstances, to expect something else of them after they are married to you is a big ask. I believe that along your journey with your man before tying the knot you would have had a chance or two to experience how he interacts with the family. If he was the type that steered clear of wahala and let things be - then you have to brace yourself for the ride. If he is like me that barks the marching orders to everyone including the parents then you know that push comes to shove he will be able to take a stand.

We did not choose our parents & siblings, we however chose our partners and with that comes their families.

You Pray for something = It might work it might not
You don't Pray = It might work it might not

Same probability bros pitch your tent somewhere and stick with it.
lol