₦airaland Forum

Wendy80: He didn't pay. She said when she saw the clothes she asked how much he paid for the clothes and he said he didn't pay a dime and she went mute.

beeevan: Most times someone somewhere is touching or masturbates in his presence . Most parents are extremely careless, as far as kids are concerned everyone is a suspect. Stuffs like this is why am extremely paranoid about live ins of any sort. When kids go outside, they reflect what they are taught at home. My 4yrs old reported a girl for opening her pants in class today and that was the first thing he told me when I came to pick him, i told him that he did well. Kids are sensitive and an irresponsible adult around them is pure disaster.

r231: Which kain musu dog be dis

200k .........ooh boy for 200k this beta know how to dance and perform magic for market

pickabeau1: You also should chill
You have strong opinions on spanking..have u forgotten we have discussed before
Raising a new thread will not lay this one to a wasteland

temi4fash: yea I think so.. Heard its a place for stubborn kids under 18 so we were told when we young..

baralatie: then do you believe that marriage is a "programme that will only print out result based on input from both the husband or wife"
I.e.good input=good results

bad input=bad results

temi4fash: Me don't think the punishment was extreme if its not detrimental to his health. When I was growing up their use to be these family friend we use t have their son was just extremely stubborn all methods proved abortive. The parents was frustrated, when it was too much they took him to remand home at yaba or so they left him there for 3 days una when he came back the guy brain reset. Now the guy is one responsible dude now. Me self I don't chop some kind beatings that when I remember self I just thank God say them beat the devil comot. Shebi its the bible that says in the heart of a child is madness but with better cane it would be chased out(modified)

Wendy80: I didn't ask her about payment but I will find out from her sha.

pickabeau1: hmm... maybe a new thread should be opened so that the pros and cons of beating can be well discussed

baralatie: do you think that women have no fault in marriage!

snazzylove:

buh I won't call occassional spanking of my childs bumbum an abuse. No.

beeevan: A 3 years old child understands very well and knows why he was punished, if pepper will stop that obscene behavior, then so be it. Kids can touch their stuff but usually when they are absent minded, this child seems to be paying so much attention to his thing and that's unusual. An adult may be abusing this child, this woman should keep her eyes on the ground .
Places where kids aren't spanked or punished, are they any better? If tough love is what it takes to set my child straight, i won't hesitate. Nah so rape they take start and if this rubbish doesn't stop, his lil sis go collect.
The pepper thing seems extreme but if it is effective, why not?

5minsmadness: Really? That's all you got from that exceedingly long post? Pity. I really put effort into typing it. Oh well.


Thanks. Nothing as refreshing as a balanced view.



But you have to earn the respect. Isn't that what you ladies always tell us men?


My post encourages the woman to live at peace with her husband. If she no get power make she no go fight.
The bracketed sentence is your reasoning, not mine.


Yes it does. Why would a man who carried a woman to the altar, financed her education(things insecure men won't do for fear their wives will become 'too wise'), and had 4kids with her suddenly want to get her out of the house. So.etching must have turned the rosy marriage into a bed of thorns. What was it? If we find the problem can't we find the solution?

Lol! Who still thinks like this? Have you been living in the dark ages? Which sane man in this day and age thinks this way? I think you have been reading too much of Chimamanda's books.



If that's what it takes for peace to reign at that moment then yes she should do it. Two people stamping their feet on the ground and screaming at the top of their lungs has never solved anything. One person has to be the mature one and back down once in a while else the situation escalates.


If Oga is increasingly finding fault with madam then there is an underlying problem. Why not find out what the problem is in a calm manner and seeing if it can be solved?



How do you define marriage? Do you feel that marriage is a trap when men are lords and masters and women are slaves? If you do then anything the man does will annoy you, any move the man makes will be scuntinised by you to see if he is trampling on your rights or not.

That is no way to live. That is no way to be happy.

There's a thread going on now about whether a lady can call her man Sir or Daddy. There are going to be dissenting views.I have ignored it so far not because i care either way but because I know its going to be another gender war there. Ladies are going to be screaming that the man is not their King so why should they call him daddy?

Well, why did you marry him then? If you cannot see him as your king how do you expect him to treat you like his queen?

Of course men see women as human beings. You ladies should see men as human beings too. We have feelings, pride and self-worth too. And if you trample on that, well...retaliation is inevitable.

If you both love each other none of this fighting for respect or rights will occur in the first place.

5minsmadness: @cococandy
See what i mean? Why go into a marriage with such a huge chip on your shoulder? How do you expect such a marriage to last? Too many women see men as barbaric, cheating control freaks and too many men see women as sharp-tongued , disrespectful gold diggers.
Both sides are looking for what to get from each other in marriage instead of what they can give.
I'm trying to find a balance. If there is no outright violence I try to listen to both sides of the story not just condemn one person on the storytellers point of view alone. If we keep shouting at each other without finding the root of the problem, the problem will never be solved.

My Calabar chic used to calle Daddy. I was 25 then. It was sexy as hell
And in no way did it make me look down on her

snazzylove: I don't know the generation you belong to. But if you belong to my generation am not sure you would have spoken in dat manner.

Parenting styles differ. And here is Naija where 'koboko' has been used as a form or restoring sanity in kids since 19...

So are u saying that our parents were never fit to be parents??
Smh

Wendy80: Good Morn E-Family, Not been here in awhile. Been very very busy lately jare. But I get gist 2day sha des an issue concerning my mate and I don't know how to handle it.
She's been married for 5years now. According to her b4 she got married to her hubby, he was dating someone who resides in the UK and they were still very much 2geda but She still went ahead to date him. She was aware of d Chick in the UK but didn't really care since she's here with him, eventually he married her‎.
She's been worrying her hubby 2get som Tshirts for himself (for himself oh)to replace d wornout ones he has and h‎e agreed. Just 2weeks ago she stumbled on chat btw hubby n Ex about helping him to get some Tshirts and sending dem thru a friend who's in d UK for hols. She agreed and even sent him som pics of d clothes while in a shop. To cut long story short the clothes arrived yesterday and she's really been bitter and had to tell me about it this morning. The 1st question I asked her was if she has had any occasion to doubt his trust and she said No and I told her to relax it might just be a harmless chat but I'm in a dilemma cos in the 1st place she can't talk about it since her source is his phone which she doesn't want him to know about.
‎

bukatyne: You must have missed the memo

kendrick93: but why d publicity? who gives a damn

aisha2: The truth is that even a drunk man will have standards when it comes to choosing a wife.
You find a man with a long list of attributes in a wife he is looking for no matter how he himself is he will tell you which of the girls he is dating is good for marriage and which is not. It is the women who seem to be allergic to having standards. You will see a supposedly smart put together woman who just wants a husband, she can be picky about her shoes, clothes bags etc but she is willing to accept any kind of man just to be someone's wife because all her mates are married, or her parents are forcing her to marry.

Over the years we have emotionally blackmailed women into not having standards, we tell them that they are choosy and will end up frustrated spinsters, so women have no conditioned their mind to grab any man even with no tangible husbandish character just so they can be considered married with the hope of changing himwhich normally totally fails.
My message is for women to have and stick to standards and not allow fear and desperation make them make bad choices anymore.

No one should marry a silly spouse male or female

Acidosis: Why do you think Nigerians call their Pastors 'Daddy'?

Officiallyurs: What is your defination of insult? Cos I never insulted the dude abi his he nyashing you ladies on family section? What Y'all defensive for him cos the nigggga aint complaining

Officiallyurs: You used a key world "jokingly" we are talking about everytime

Acidosis: If you call him Daddy, people MIGHT see him and treat him like a 'Daddy'; if you call him Kid, others and even his in-laws MIGHT treat him like a 'kid'.

The decision is in your hands.

kandiikane: That is silly...A silly mentality...The woman calling him sir nko? Is it the names that determines who is head and who isn't. If that is the case someone calling their partner buttercups means they think the guy is fruity/homosexual.

Officiallyurs: if a man should refer his wife as MA that means the woman is the HEAD of the Family.

crunchyg: I just need your contacts maybe phone no, bbm, email or anything so we can kick off from there, I really wants to be close pals