E685:
My wife and I have been together for 8 years now, married for 5. I am 33 and she is 30. We now have our first child, a son who is just turning 1. He is everything to both of us. Before our son, our relationship was strong, although to be honest I’ve always been frustrated with my wife’s way of handling issues. I’m the kind of person who is very hard to get angry, I hear people out, and I talk out my issues. I listen to all sides and I think logically before emotionally. I seek therapy when I’m stuck. My wife is the opposite. She reacts with emotions first. She is very quick to be offended by anything. She will shut down and refuse to communicate until she has had time to process. I do all of the work resolving issues we have. I sometimes wonder if I ever stop taking the high road and work through our issues, if anything would ever resolve itself. So that being said, conflict management aside, we are happy. We are passionate, have similar interests, and make each other laugh.

Then there’s my mother. Where to begin. My mother, while seen as incredibly loving and generous to many people, is also a person who has been shut out of so many relationships in her life that I really just feel bad. My father and her are divorced. She has a genuine phobia of being left out - of gatherings, of relationships, of family. She is extremely smart and knows how to manipulate people into doing what she wants. She also widely seen as a “difficult” person. She is difficult in that she finds great offense to issues many people would not notice or care about. If she feels wronged, she will overwhelm the person who wronged her with incessant questions trying to make them feel her side until they cave in. In her closest relationships, her absolute need for the show of love and inclusion and validation cause the very people she is trying to reel closer in to push her away, a self fulfilling prophecy. My Mom, while I love her, is her own worst enemy.

Needless to say, these two, my wife and my mother, clash. At first they liked each other. The very first issue involved our wedding planning. My wife had a very clear plan for the guest list, and my mom asked for a number of her friends to be included on the list. My wife did not want that, got immediately upset and the situation blew out of control. My mom called me nonstop asking why my wife could be so cold, unwilling to see her side, or give in even an inch. My wife felt my Mom was making the wedding all about her, and could not believe she was called cold. She was “done”. My mom wasn’t paying for a cent of the wedding either so this was another offense. In the end I brokered a compromise, much to the dismay of both women. Each held the grudge for a long time.

Occasionally my mother would do something that my wife disliked, and my wife would be pissed at me for not standing up for her. Admittedly I had never stood up to my mother, I always took the time to listen to her side and find reason behind her otherwise inflammatory ways. My wife and mother had a falling out right before the wedding, and forced me to choose sides. I struggled as I found both of them to be at fault. I chose my wife and my mother hated it. Ever since, basically anything that my mother says or does, whether good or not, offends my wife. Even the most genuine attempts by my mother to reach out to my wife are smacked down. My wife has never made any effort to release the past resentment. Over the years my mother has attempted to take the high road, only to be barely acknowledged by my wife. I have always pleaded with my wife to at least pretend to like my mother. She did a bad job of pretending because my mother would always call me and ask why my wife appears to never care or never let go of past feelings. So both saw through each other, my mother would continue to act happy and loving, while my wife never would.

Anyway now our son came into the picture. He is amazing and being the first grandchild on both sides, the grandparents want to be around him every chance they can get. My mother visit every weekend. I told my wife we have to let her do this. My wife dreaded this. I told my mother that one of the weekends, we wanted her to visit on a Sunday (staying over till Monday morning) instead of a Saturday because we had plans that Saturday. In actuality the day was a birthday celebration for my father in law, being held at her parents house. She just didn’t want my mother involved in everything so she put her foot down. My mother wouldn’t take no for an answer and pulled it out of me what we were doing that day. Well she took great offense to the fact that she was not automatically invited, and couldn’t believe how cold, unChristian, and I loving my wife and her family were.

This stuff affects me greatly so of course I share with my wife, and she exclaims she is done with my mother. No longer wants to be nice or pretend, she is tired of how much my mother always wants it all to be her way and then throws out insulting and hurtful words about my wife to get her way. I get messages from my moms friends telling me how I need to see things my moms way, they would never exclude their mother this way, and that my wife is causing all of this.

And so here we are. I saw my mother the next day, and my wife removed herself from the situation by staying out for the day. It was incredibly uncomfortable. I told my mother how mad I was at her for always being so difficult and never just letting it go. I told her my real feelings about how I wished she could stop needing such inclusion and love. Her response was that she is justified in wanting to be included in everything, and that my wife has never shown her any love or effort and it was obvious, so what could she possibly do? I told her my wife is willing to work on this, perhaps in professional therapy. But in reality my wife wants no part of that and has no desire to mend anything anymore. I think she resents me for trying to mend things.

So what do I do? I’m frustrated with my mom for being difficult, always needing more and never letting things go, and saying inflammatory things when she doesn’t get her way. But I see that all she’s ever wanted was peace and love, and my wife never gave her that. I’m frustrated with my wife for getting so easily offended at everything my mother says or does, and I wish she could make any effort to see the other side and let go of such a grudge. My mother is definitely strong willed and manipulative but I think there is love there if only we could work through it. My wife is extremely assertive and refuses to let anyone wrong her twice. Both think the other has always been dead wrong, the entirety of the blame, and will never change. My wife is ok never seeing my mother again, yet my mother says she wants to let bygones be bygones and attempt to work through it.

What should I do? Forever stuck in the middle. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

mehn the thought of this scares me a lot. knowing the kind of person my mum is too, I'm not yet married but I'm already starting to think of ways that I can prevent misunderstanding between my mum and my future wife ... lol

ikorodureporta:


Source: https://m.guardian.ng/features/health/african-star-apple-may-damage-fertility-in-men/

It's a God given fruit to reduce our population

religion is the problem.... because it is their God giving right to acquire many wives and birth many children regardless of their financial status and economy of the country as long as they can turn up to vote in order to keep the rich northern elites in power and then continue to beg for alms from them

Made4naijalove:
Mercy Eke’s sister accuses Tacha’s fans of declaring herself and their mom dead



https://www.instagram.com/p/B7QJx32gD_w/?igshid=n5wt4473dxjf

See video below


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzPVcso9oA8

that one enter...2 seconds she burst cry... why fight with tacha when you can't withstand the stench.. it's not to be calling on the whole wide world

Safaxano:
My neighbor has an undeveloped plot and I’ve had to kill over 20 of this same type of snakes, cos they keep crawling into my compound.

I decided to take a good pix of the one I killed the other night, maybe someone will help identify if it’s poisonous.

NB. I’ve just paid to clear the plot.

odikwa very poisonous.....you have to torch your neighbours plot make sure it's burnt
to the lithosphere ....lol

lebron7:

Awwwwn
Such a poor foolish nigger
Better go hustle make u no dey defend scrap

you wey don hustle finish wetin be your net worth? no that one too much for you, wetin you don achieve? iPhone 6 wey you buy second hand for 40k

valentineuwakwe:


Source: https://punchng.com/let-us-break-if-north-retains-power-in-2023-gbadamosi/

easy as ABC.... they will say that the unity of Nigeria is not negotiable, because the faulty and bigoted constitution is caressing and breastfeeding them like a baby, and even so poverty still prevails among them because the rich politicians have turned their state wealth to private wealth and you see the illiterate indigenes shouting 'SAI OGA NE' to the cause of their backwardness and poverty. they will now be fighting against Southerners as if they are the cause of their predicaments.

Thegeneralqueen:
Arabic is not our language hope you knowooooooo.....

but every other thing is written in English na!

Fuckthamods:
Let's see her pics and when she is not putting on pant... Pictures or adonbili...

lol konji go kill you there

lalasticlala:
A Facebook user, Adebiyi Gabriel Olajide-Mackson, shared this story that highlights the influence of Naira Marley and his Marlian gang on the daughter.

Read below:



https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=170625234292769&id=100040358806067

you checked her VAGI what? lol. why will you do such a thing? did your own mother check your vagina? you should have gone to the hospital instead

diasporaman:
Pressure Mounts On Apostle (Prof) Johnson Suleman To Run For Presidency In 2023 With Shekh (Dr.) Ahmad Abubakar Gumi As His Running Mate

Written by Obiwest Utchaychukwu OFM Media Europe

Nigerians reacts as the news broke over intense pressure mounting on Apostle (Professor) Johnson Suleman with Sheikh (Dr.) Gumi to enlist as Presidential and Vice Presidential candidates towards 2023 general elections.

While some factions of the country are in support of the idea as a noble one; with the impression that the duo are young, vibrant, Godfearing, well educated, very close to the Nigerian masses, and above all, have become strong voices on behalf of the voiceless majorities over the years. Some others are of the opinion that clerics are only called to religious (faith based) and moral propagation; and already have their roles spelt out in nation building.

Some other reactions states that both Apostle Johnson Suleman and Sheikh (Dr.) A.A. Gumi are more relevant in building a morally sound society for Nigeria (just as they have hitherto been doing over the years); than joining the Nigerian type of politics that is now abused and have become void of good conscience towards humanity.

Apostle Suleman's magnanimity in respect of his humanitarian gestures, plus the Auchi/Abuja road repair work he commenced recently promoted the imagination in the hearts of northern elites. They are of the opinion that it won't be a bad idea if we have clerics to run our nation; given the fact that we are religiously sentimental.


Obiwest Utchaychukwu The Media Apostle
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=3222716231121043&id=100001480944261

the write up said that they were both young.. then I scrolled down and I saw white Gemu (beards). lol

wizzynuru:
Lol.. And u posted tips on how to make a man happy last year December. Looks like u don't practice what u teach.

you are a typical example of Village People how can you be monitoring someone else's post like that lol

lebron7:
Don't mind the o.p ohh Avoid infinix, Tecno and itel

which one does your father use?

Rosskii:


Brainless dunce. If they tell you who orchestrated 9/11, why, and for what reasons, your eyes will pop out. Have you heard of the 'New World Order'?

Anti-research airheads. Go and study the Project for the New American Century. (Lemme guess, you've never heard of it)

Dunderheads.

foolish idiot..get your facts right. Did osama bin laden not claim responsibility? Or is it the false conspiracy theory that was accusing jews of orchestrating the attack? How can that be considering the population of jews in newyork and the jewish casualties that resulted from the catastrophe. Do you think that jews will kill jews? You will just open your mouth and start spitting garbage! Cuz thats what you are full of. Retarded skunk.
Retard!

manz:
Wetin concern us? If then like make them make the Nigerian president na.

hahahaha... guy.. abi o!

shilenji:
he glanced through textbook is different from he read through textbook

you meant glanced there is no way you READ and you get below 250
during my time I was only able to read chemistry ND biology through and I negleted eng ND physics due to laziness but reading those two alone got me above 280, so my bro read to understand and ask questions, if you are writing biology ND chemistry, I am willing to help you, not expo o I mean if you have any topic you don't understand ask me I will explain and I will also teach you how to answer jamb questions reach me 09073004838

lie lie jamb that is total of 400, but two subjects got you 280! haba mana! were you scoring bonus points?

GameGod:
Anti-war protesters gathered outside the White House this weekend to denounce the U.S. drone strike that killed Iran's Major General Qasem Soleimani last week. See the message they are delivering.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/newsus.cgtn.com/news/2020-01-06/Anti-war-demonstrators-rally-outside-the-White-House-N15YjQCQJq/share_amp.html

foolish citizens... be like dey don forget 9/11 so soon... oya iran give them 2/20

GameGod:
Anti-war protesters gathered outside the White House this weekend to denounce the U.S. drone strike that killed Iran's Major General Qasem Soleimani last week. See the message they are delivering.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/newsus.cgtn.com/news/2020-01-06/Anti-war-demonstrators-rally-outside-the-White-House-N15YjQCQJq/share_amp.html

foolish citizens... be like dey don forget 9/11 so soon... oya iran give them 2/20

superlanny:
Hmm, I have been watching this development with a Keen eye, and one thing is certain, if this conflict escalates, it will be a mutually assured destruction for both countries and every other Continent.
They are both nuclear powers and they both know that no matter how much they hate each other, they can't follow that option. The best they can do is to keep targeting soft and hard targets, in other countries except their own.
Quote me anywhere, there won't be any world war III, and if there is, we should only hope that, they restrain themselves of the nuclear option, because that's Light Out for the planet.

you are not completely correct. it can't be light out for the planet... how many nuclear war heads does iran have?... and how many can they successfully drop in america? for
for instance when little boy and big boy were dropped in Fukushima and Nagasaki, Japan, did it affect the neighbouring countries? so humans have not made a weapon powerful enough to destroy earth. if iran can successfully drop 2 nuclear bombs in america, i can assure you that america will successfully drop 20 nuclear bombs in strategic locations and one side will swiftly cease to exist and everything will be back to normal on planet �

Naijamemestrend:


https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2020/01/05/politics/pelosi-war-powers-resolution/index.html

abeg they should give this Nancy pelosi her own missile... is it menopause or feminism that is worrying her

Naijamemestrend:


https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2020/01/05/politics/pelosi-war-powers-resolution/index.html

abeg they should give this Nancy pelosi her own missile... is it menopause or feminism that is worrying her

it was nice of you to buy him a wristwatch, ill give you that, you deserved to be appreciated... but i think you were over billed for that wrist watch. i guess you bought it from this hausa-fulani people. lol. for me if they tell me the price of something lets say N5k, i prize it N700 and then we settle for N950. in other words what I'm trying to say is that the watch isn't fancy enough. but that doesn't give him the right to treat you like that.

Openbusiness:
House Committee on Foreign Affairs, a committee of the House of Representatives, dominated by anti-Trump Democrats and an anti-Trump Speaker Nancy Pelosi that just ran the most sham one-sided single-party impeachment charade in history without a single Republican vote, and was chicken scared of the illegality she did she couldn't dare send articles of impeachment to the senate for trial. Sore losers. Trump 2020 is a sure thing. These people are the enemies from within that helps the Arab enemies outside trying to destroy America. Trump has scattered their plans so they hate him with passion. Let Iran do anyhow, they will see anyhow. Trump will bypass Congress and nothing will happen. He won't be the first president to do it and won't be the last. Bush did it, Obama did it when he sent billions of dollars in cash loaded on planes to a terrorist enemy state Iran overnight without Congressional approval, sent billions in cash to a country and government that openly chants death to America all the time, even in their Parliament. But the Republicans didn't impeach him for it. Rather they waited to take over power and they succeeded with Trump. Trump 2020, Pence 2024 - 2032, then after that Ben Carson 2033 to 2041. The Democrats have a long time left to cry

i love how you reason... such a beautiful mind

sarrki:
Later some people will say nah village people dey do am



https://mobile.twitter.com/Lordoye1/status/1213706971813154816

so who should trump kill? buhari? abba kyari? maman daura? CJN?

KendrickAyomide:
people rooting for war are doing so from the comfort of their homes behind their Mobile phones and obviously don't know what it feels like to be in the Field

leave us alone... chief of army staff.. field soldier

naptu2:
Nigeria Police Force @PoliceNG



https://twitter.com/PoliceNG/status/1213889418001604608

taqiyya!... he's indirectly telling the hoodlums and miscreants to initiate their attack... rubbish

Pentasoft1978:
The African Ally will be U and your household.

he forgot that Sunni is not Shi'ite ...or else buhari(sunni) would have released el -zakzaky(Shi'ite)

ehen ... let no nigerian muslim begin to misbehave oh. coz na their hobby, if two people dey fight abroad dem go carry the matter for their head come dey destroy people properties and kill innocent unarmed citizens.

so if fight too hungry una make una travel go iran and help dem fight U.S

the innocent civilians in Nigeria are not U.S citizens. make una use una head

Clemostica:
The terrorists in Washington are arming ALL the terrorists in the Middle East,,,, War is an inside job for personal profits to scumbag politicians and bankers, wake up people,,, if another country were to do to the US what she is doing to others,,,Americans would scream bloody murder,,, so WHY the Bleep,,, do they support that behavior done to other people?,

I'll tell you this... USA has the sanity and justification to hold that position and do whatever they want and however they like because 'they are not bigoted by religious extrimism' any other contry can not be allowed this privilege because religious sentiments has taking away their sense of judgement

RaptorX:
How long can Iran last in all out war with the US when they are under severe US sanctions already. With this Trump threat I see Iran calming down and let the whole thing fizzle out while hoping Trump will not be reelected and a more conciliatory democratic President comes to the white house.

Thats a good thought. But we are talking about USA. No democratic govt can be conciliatory enough not to respond to terrorism. Either way whether trump or not, if america is attacked, iran will get it 10 fold

CAPSLOCKED:
AS USUAL, CHRISTIANS ARE JUBILATING BECAUSE IT'S ISLAM THAT IS BEING PULLED.
BUT IF YOU BAN A CHRISTIAN FROM PREACHING OR PRAYING PUBLICLY, OR YOU BAN CHRISTIAN RELIGIOUS BOOKS OR ITEMS YOU'LL FIND THEM WAILING ABOUT THE ATTACK ON CHRIST AND HOW THE GATES OF HELL CANNOT PREVAIL, ALONG WITH OTHER NONSENSES THEY UTTER WHENEVER THEIR RELIGIOUS ACTIONS ARE QUESTIONED.


THE TRUTH IS, CHRISTIANS AND MUSLIMS.... YOU ARE ONE.

YOU ALL HAVE TO STOP FIGHTING EACH OTHER. YOU NEED TO EMBRACE EACH OTHER LIKE ONE LARGE CONGREGATION OF GULLIBLE DIRECTIONLESS HERD OF CATTLE THAT NEITHER KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING OR WHERE THEY'RE GOING.

What a waste your Father's cum!

She no see iraq before she go work for U.S? Or Afghanistan, iran and d rest of the hijab capitals

what a waste of personality. sometimes one has to question the mental state of another person. how can a cleric with all the basic education and religious education in addition see holiday as the problem in nigeria... if it's possible let d govt give them 2yrs holiday, it doesn't concern anybody. so all the killings, kidnaps, hate speeches and d rest of all social vices done by his religious group can be overlooked, but no... holiday is his problem. in fact i am pleading with the govt to give them 3 months holiday, it doesn't change the cost of living or price of garri.. because it's such an unimportant thing

DonFreshmoney:
YCEE why don't you hype yourself, it's because you know you are a nonentity of no order... very soon, you go sign in to naira Marley record label...

Upcoming jargon

Na inferiority complex dey worry ycee