₦airaland Forum

Redoil:
why spaming my mention

guobe:
I initially intended gifting 10,000 naira to five people but I feel it will go round to more people if I gift 2,000 naira to 25 people.
If you were earlier successful in the earlier 20,000 naira gifted recently to guys please dont participate as I will ignore you.
Please if you really don't need it allow people that need it to get it.
The country is currently very tough but God got our back.
Thanks and may God bless us all as I will commence distribution of the 2,000 naira to 25 people soonest.

mariahAngel:
I saw this post, and I thought we should help this guy out, shall we?

guobe:
Transfer of 20k to Elizabeth Oluwasegun completed.
180k transferred so far.

adesegun121:
Only when you take away peace of mind from boys marriage. 😁

Source: https://gistmeloveblog.com/how-true-about-this-in-marriage-see-photo/

FanRong:
I'm sorry, this post is going to be a long one. But you're saving a soul if you read through and advice candidly.


My story
We've dated for 6months and we've lived together for the 6months.

On our 3rd month, I found her interesting and told her I'll like to marry her. She accepted but no engagement ring or anything to show. We just accepted by word of mouth.

Since then, I've worked towards it. I've told her to call her mum and eldest brother(dad is late) to relate my idea and understand their feeling since it won't be that easy to marry. (same state, but my people and her people are highly selective in marriage)

After several persuasion, and threat that I'll throw her out if she doesn't relate the circumstances to her family, she called the mum. And again I had to force her to call the eldest brother. She claimed she did. And that's enough. I'm ok.

Meanwhile, there's this guy(her ex) she claims helped her when she came to Lagos. It was when I started accommodating her that I found out in her chats that she was living with this guy, but lied to me she was living with her Aunt and the aunt's husband was harassing her sexually and she wants to leave. She later told me the guy, though provides for him but has never had sex with her, even when she was living in his house. These stories doesn't move me since everyone, who is not a virgin has an ex. So I forgave all that and we moved on.

She wasn't everything I need in a women, but I told myself I could train her the way I want. We continued adjusting to each others likes and dislikes.

I feed her this 6 months, provide comfortable shelter, buy her things she needs,(not want). Told her I'll do more and open a shop for her, if we get married, but she still confronts me asking why should I wait till after marriage? . I didn't allow the words move me cos Its my decision and my money and also, I'm used to gold diggers.

A good number of times, I see her as being selfish. If things doesn't benefit her, she'll not get bothered even if I'm involved.

Just this week, It became obvious to me that she argues everything I request her to do. From 24th Dec, we've been on holiday, we're always at home.
1. I'll wake her up at 9 and ask her to prepare breakfast for the family, she'll prefer to roll on the bed than do it. I'll finally have to do it myself so I can get things done and get busy.

2. I detest girls on eye lashes. I've repeatedly told her how I dislike it, but when she went to fix herself for the Christmas, she fixed the eyelashes, Contrary to my demand.

3. I got her some sneakers to upgrade her fashion style and look smarter, instead of the usual slippers and sandals she wears.
When we prepared to go to the beach few days ago, I requested her to put on the sneakers to look more fashionable, but she refused buttressing that she must wear what she wants, sandals.

4. Few days ago, we had a heated argument and she said that if I'm not happy that she's living with me, that she can go, afterall, she has somewhere to stay. I asked her to go and she immediately called that her ex bf to come to my house. I immediately swung into action, took all her belongings out, before the ex will arrive, at the same time, retrieving the items I gifted her.
While she was struggling to have her gifted items back, our neighbours heard the struggle and had to come and settle for us. She apologized and I forgave her. we were back into the house.

5. Just yesterday , we left home together, and I locked the door and I took the keys with me. We walked down the street together to the Busstop, I have almost no friend and seldomly greet. But there's this my ex girlfriend by the roadside, she saw me and yelled my name, I went to greet her and my Fiancée picked offence, left me without waiting for me. After that I chased her and told her it's nothing because I've told her everything about this ex.
Before we could get to the Busstop, she demanded for the house keys and I gave her since she might come back earlier than me.
We couldn't say bye. The anger was clear on her face and we parted ways.

After about 15mins, I got to where I wanted to make payment for the items I picked only to notice I am not with my transaction phone. I was confused where could I have kept it, the seller insisted I may not have come to his shop with the phone, and the phone rang as I called with my second phone. so I had to call my Fiancée for assistance since she's with the keys.
At first, she said she was still around the Busstop but when I told her I needed her to go home and confirm my phones whereabout, she said she can't go back that she has gone far, shouted on me and hung the phone.

I called and called and called, but she didn't pick. Many thoughts ran into me. Who took this phone? My money? , my phone? , my sim card? . I had to find my way and trekked back about 4km to the house since I had no cash with me. And finally saw the phone ringing in my house. I was relieved.

The way she shouted to me on the phone got me unbalanced, I felt she would be fire if I get this girl as a wife.

We finally traveled to our home state today and I paid the bills for the traveling. My major plan of traveling was to see her people and do the needful before I mistakenly get her pregnant. But I'm seriously contemplating of canceling this plan and throw her out come January. I need peace.

Dear nairalanders, I'm really in the middle of the deep blue sea and the devil.

I need mature and candid advice please.
Should I continue with the marriage plans or the redflags are obvious?

Halcyon123:
You will need
Rice(for tuwo)
Groundnut
Peel the Groundnut and wash. Then blend or grind
Add water to the paste and seive out the milk
Put on fire and add your washed rice and allow to cook on low heat till very soft. You can blend just little of the rice and add to make it thick.

Halcyon123:
Akara and kunun gyeda
Chinchin

ceejay80s:
Nairaland is back!!!!!!

finallybusy:
Fine girl no dey Nairaland.

lovetterrison:
which one dem invite you abeg make i visit na legit one ?[/b]

Slurity:
I AM A CHRISTAIN AND I CAN TELL YOU FOR FREE, CELESTIAL IS NOT GOD'S CHURCH. IT IS JUST A WORLDLY SOCIETY WITH ROOTED BACKGROUNG IN OCCULTIC PRACTICES. You will be shock to know that they may not even inviting those musicians, but a plan to deceive people to attend. That is the headquarters of pastors marrying multitude wives and also headquarters of single women at the same time.

joseph1832:
Sadly, is a luxury seun can not afford.

ogascomax:
It's just a complicated matter sometimes. Some abusive marriage latter became beautiful at the end. My pastor told us today how his sister fought for her marriage. At some point it was truly an abusive marriage that the man even beat her while she was pregnant and almost lost the baby. Fast forward, latter she became born again and so did her husband. They are now living peacefully ever after.
It's a gamble so decide how to play it.

Ensa777:
Because it is unnatural for her to be the sole provider for her family. The man instead of having unnecessary erection should channel that energy into providing for his family.
The bad financial situation can make a woman develop resentment for the man. Its a huge mood killer.

The woman who has become the sole provider do not want to add another soul into the situation she found herself which could stretch their lean' resources the more.

What amazes me most is that in Nigeria particularly, the woman is expected to continue with all her wifely duties in addition to providing for the family while society makes excuses for him who at that time is supposed to help out in anyway to ease his wife and make her look forward to both of them 'destressing' later. They will tell you to be gentle with him that Any lil thing hurts the ego of the jobless man. So he'd stay at home all day pressing phone instead of at least cleaning the house or doing laundry or cooking dinner. No!

ONEjoblessGUY:
Lol....
How??

Malamkwabo:
Pictures pls

Kobojunkie:
Op wrote of a friend dying in his sleep. You can in suggesting something similar happened to your friend only that your friend didn't die in the end. So, my line of questions is to ascertain exactly what it is that in fact happened to your friend since OP and gang did not perform an autopsy on dead friend.

□ Apart from the delusion your friend said he experienced , what did the doctors actually say happened to your friend to cause him to collapse in his sleep?
□ you said your friend was revived but did doctors confirm that he indeed died and was revived or did you probably confuse fainting from lack of oxygen or pain with death in your narrative?

Basically , what did the doctors say was wrong with your friend?

Kobojunkie:
You rushed him to the hospital and didn't even bother to ask the doctor what was really wrong with him? The psychotic images his mind conjured up does not explain what really happened to him, you know that, right?

By the way, did doctors confirm that your friend died or you simply assumed that he did when it could have been that he was merely unconscious?

olasaad:
This is the kind of death I like and always pray for. I don't want to disturb anyone.

Charisma01:
Ehhn!!! People still dey buy bag of pure water for150? For my area for Abuja, it's 250

ahnie:
No #50 naira biscuits in my hood
#100 upwards.

ahnie:
Location varies Sha!
And I was thinking I got mine for a cheapie!

ahnie:
Kobojunkie...see me and hookup this morning.the name funny sha!

Zoer got the carton for #3,075 naira, quite a cheapie!

Skyview01:
While thinking and reminiscing, I am thinking of my childhood and growing up, as kids, whenever our fatger would come back from work, we would allwys all run out of the house through the backdoor at the sound of his car horn.

The biggest reason is immediately he is stepping in, he would start complaining about things not being in their right places.
Chores not being done or improperly done, house not clean enough and he would always have something to complain about in an angry tone of voice.

I came to believe it was his own way of dealing with a stressful day at work and over time, it kinda created some tensions between us.

I told myself, no matter what, if I had my own family, no matter the stress I pass through during the day, i would never take it out on the kids or wife.

So whenever i come back from work and i see chores not done properly, my father's reaction would flash in my mind and i would take a deep breath and go the opposite directio , ask the kids and wife how their day went.
and generaly chit chat about them without making them uncomfortable around me.

At the end, I might ask my son, "sweetheart, when are you going to wash the dishes? Even at the peak of a very stressful day, I would find a way to smile and go to my room in solitude.

Secondly, shouting at the children while correcting the. My dad as a true Nigerian man would yell at a high octave while correcting us and it frequently drives me crazy as a teenager.

With my kids and family, I practice a low even tone of voice while i am angry or making neccessary corrections. I find this to be very effective as it made the kids receptive and willing to change.

The results, kids are free with me and can discuss virtually everything in their lives with me.

So, what did you see your father do while growing up you were unhappy with and wanted to change in your own family.