₦airaland Forum

quickberry:
My father is a Dumbo

Ouch!

Alright!

Check out 9 things to expect in 2019 as a Nigerian

https://www.nairaland.com/4920960/9-possible-things-expect-nigerian

quickberry:
Prove it

Go and meet your English teachers from elementary school to tertiary to prove it.

moscobabs:
But I heard this guy is broke.where he con get the money from?

tesppidd:


I thought he said he was bankrupt?

Google "Power" seasonal movie. He is producer of the movie and it grossed alot plus endorsement deals he got

AryEmber:
I fully support her on this. How can you bring out your thing even after seeing someone is about to pass, some guys are guilty of this. And please, how in the hell's name do some people relieve themselves without washing?

Women are just hypocrites. I usually do my stuff with my wallet or hand stretched out to cover my instrument from the view of any oncoming female pedestrian close by. One day when I did and two ladies were passing by, one of them said, "He dey hide am because e small"... She didn't know I overheard it. I simply told her that it was not as small as her father's own.

We hide it, it is a problem...we don't, we are perverts. No one should take that jobless tramp seriously.

That thing was not a robbery. It was a premeditated murder. Someone was not happy about the young man's progress. It should be investigated.

quickberry:
Pot calling kettle black

You don't even know how to use "both"

And you should know that you "throw a party" and not "throw up a party".

LuciferCatholic:
10. Death.


People will (must) die especially Nairalanders.

No explanation.

Are you ok?

ManirBK:
When you lack home training you need cain.PDP bundles of robbers!

Coming from a Sai Barbarian who cannot differentiate between "Cain" and "Cane"

omooba969:
No wonder your kind believe anything and everything.

Òdè.

She gave a complete narration of the lifestyle of every average yoruba female.

Edusouls:
see how a very spoilt girl is exposing her dirty life on social media,ndi yoruba enwegho ihere, tufiakwa..

Otu mkpuru ihere adiro fa n'anya!

Yuceeluv:
I don't discriminate and I don't take life too seriously. This life is nothing darl!

...So you and decryptor should stop and go and start cooking your Xmas rice . Merry Xmas to you both in advance.

As long as you have assured me of zero chances of meeting with him, I'm good with that!

I knew he was not capable of doing that!

See 9 things to expect as a Nigerian in 2019

https://www.nairaland.com/4920960/9-possible-things-expect-nigerian

madridguy:
Mr Man what exactly is your problem? So because I want a decent igbo girl for marriage means i should give room for insult from ipob miscreants?

So you want to marry a decent Igbo girl abi? What happened to all your decent yoruba girls? From your comments on nairaland, every Igbo is ipob pig and idiots. Leave our decent ipob girls like yuceeluv.

Go to the next edition of Queen Morenmi and look for a wife. Stick to your omoluabi women.

Apart from the preparations for the yuletide and New year, another event Nigerians are looking forward to is the upcoming presidential elections which is slated for Feb 13th 2019. Hopes are high in the air for both contestants and party faithfuls as to how the electoral process will pan out with different individuals and interest groups anticipating the elections.

Well here's what to expect in 2019 during and after the elections with their probability in percentage and implications.

Note: These are just my permutations

1.) BUHARI WILL BE RE-ELECTED (99.9% probability):

I know some people will cringe after reading the bolded and some will hiss and the sound of "God forbid" will rent both the atmosphere and cybersphere but this is one hard and bitter truth! President Muhammadu Buhari will return as president and will be "re-sworn" in by May 29th.

I'll tell you why....The APC is the second democratic party after PDP to taste power and they are not willing to relinquish the power just yet back to PDP because the top guns of the party know what is in store for them if they allow the opposition to wrest power out of their hands. This means that the party will do all it takes to make sure that they sweep majority of the votes. You may ask how it will be possible with the much support Atiku of the PDP is already enjoying but to get a hint of how, go back and revisit the events that took place in the Osun state gubernatorial elections and that will give you a clue of the events to come. Moreover, let's remember that the refusal of the president to sign the Electoral Amendment Bill is a strong indicator of what to expect.

After the elections, protests and backlashes will erupt but the APC will defend the impending electoral malpractices with reasons as to why their "victory" was well deserved such as their dying minute "eye service" "back-scratching" projects and policies like Trader Moni and other similar initiatives.

IMPLICATIONS: Atiku will head to the appellate court and the case will be thrown out with legal reasons such as "Lack of concrete evidence" from the prosecution etc.

There will be massive defections back to APC from both party personnel and politicians alike.

2.) PUMP PRICE OF FUEL WILL INCREASE (85% probability):

A litre of petrol is currently being sold for N145. Brace up Nigerians because few months after the elections, the pump price of petrol will increase to about or over N200 per litre.

This will of course happen after strikes from petroleum bodies like PENGASSAN, NUPENG etc. There have been past arguments about the government paying subsidy for Nigerians and this according to them has to stop.

The petroleum minister for state Kachikwu said sometime ago that the government is looking at involving the private sector in terms of subsidy removal which has been a debate for years now in the midstream and downstream sectors.

Also, the present administration seems to have relented from their promise of revamping our moribund refineries and rather doling out licenses to private refineries which are beginning to spring up here and there where most of these licenses would become valid in the first quarter of next year.

These distortions and uncertainties coupled with the fact that PMB is the petroleum minister shows that there is a bleak future for Nigerians.

IMPLICATIONS: The increase in Pump prices of petroleum will bring about the increase in price of transportation and food prices which will make life harder for Nigerians.

3.) HIGH RATE OF UNEMPLOYMENT: 90%probability

More and more people will lose their jobs in 2019 and many businesses will shut down. The inability of most employers to pay salaries will force them to either cut down the size of their work force or close shop permanently!

IMPLICATIONS: Suicide rates, depression and frustration will increase.

Crime will become the order of the day.


4.) INCREASE IN CRIME RATE (99% probability):

The rate of crime will increase with kidnappings, armed robbery, car jacking and internet fraud taking predominance in Nigeria. The unemployed youths in order to survive and remain in tune with the latest trends will engage in vicious activities.

Others who put their hope in having a better 2019 with their anticipation of a new government will be disappointed and may vent their frustrations against society. The ones who still support this government will also be further disappointed when the standard of living becomes unbearable as opposed to what they expected in the "next level"

IMPLICATIONS: Security agencies will have a hard time trying to curb the menace of overwhelming crime in different parts of the country. High mortality rates will become the order of the day with killing and maiming of innocent victims in the bid to rid them of their valuables.
The elites and their children will be very vulnerable from next year because of the high incidences of kidnappings and quest for ransom payments.

5.) INCREASE IN MIGRATION BEFORE AND AFTER ELECTIONS (85% probability):

There will be massive movement and relocation which has already started in the last moments of 2018 due to uncertainty about the elections and its aftermath.

Nigerians (mostly South Easterners) out of fear will relocate especially from the Northern parts of Nigeria back to their states of origin and will remain there until May/June after the swearing in and kick off of the next political dispensation. The ones who couldn't travel now will most likely relocate by January/February. Some to vote and some to bolt!

IMPLICATIONS: This will bring a permanent hike in transportation fare which will be culminated by both the increase in pump price of petrol and the high volume of travelers on the roads.

Road mishaps will likely increase because of the bad state of our roads, poor maintenance of vehicles and reckless driving.

6.) INTERNET ACCESS WILL BECOME A LUXURY (80% probability):

Service providers will hike their prices to access the internet with MTN and 9mobile being likely culprits. Forget about Airtel and Glo who make outrageous and unbelievable data offers of more data with cheaper prices only for you to subscribe and use just 5% if the said data allocation before experiencing "Denial of Service".

7.) SPORTS BETTING AND GAMBLING WILL INCREASE (99.9% probability)

Good news for owners of betting outfits like Bet9ja and Lottery operators like Baba Ijebu as more and more people will spend the little or much they have to patronize these outfits in the quest to become rich or at least win some disposable income.

Don't be surprised to see your pastor checking his betslip in his office after Sunday service as from next year!

8.) INSISTENT STRIKES BY LABOUR UNIONS (75% probability):

The Nigerian Labour Congress in it's request for the new minimum wage and the lackadaisical attitude of the present government to grant their request will bring about a strike within the NLC.

Other labour unions like the teachers union, doctors etc will also go on strikes to make their voices heard by the government which will pay little or no attention.


BONUS... ASUU STRIKE MAY LINGER ON FOR MONTHS (50% probability):

For undergraduates who have been at home in the last few weeks that brings the year to an end, there is no hope in sight. Kuku go farm for your village or learn a skill.

IMPLICATION: Refer to points 4 and 7

Lemme stop here.

great15:
so I don't have much energy to talk to some inexperienced persons who just heard and haven't done it. First of when the difficulty of bitcoin mining drops the higher you gain this is because less machine is plugged into into the system go and do your research. I bought some that are more powerful than the ones I intend to sell. Save yourself from unnecessary embarrassment.

What is the gpu of this miner you are selling?

How much power does it consume in a day?

How many Satoshi does it mine in an hour?

Answer my questions let's start from there Mr Experienced!

Yuceeluv:
see your mouth. That's creative. But that's not why jare.

Yucee=uc...uc is short for uchechi...there u have it

Wow! So you are Igbo...nice! Nwannem nwanyi! Please be very wary of that so called madridguy who is flirting with you here. Do not fall for his "fake gentleman-ism".

Go through his posts and comments and see how he abuses Igbos horribly! His type will have his way with you or even go for a mere hangout with you if you meet him face-to-face and come back here bragging shamelessly about how he shagged an IPOB hairy yam-leg girl with reference to you!

Just be very careful!

nicepoker101:
and you didn't contract STDs

For some I did...for others I didn't. For the ones I didn't use protection for, I usually drank lots of colloidal silver and took strong antiviral medicines to prevent infections.

Judybash93:
Why? This ain't about fuel powered vehicles. The battery swap is majorly for electric cars

I know. Bringing it here means that the electric cars will be imported and used in Nigeria which will see fuel powered cars go into the doldrums. Secondly, it will make all these hybrid cars become useful to their owners here in Nigeria.

She is still the definition of the word "UGLY"!

What job?

By the way, you look like a tranny!

They should bring the Battery swap stations to Nigeria

Bro...that ain't an achievement. I have lost count of how many women I have slept with in my lifetime.

During the 2go era, I was screwing over 40 both here in Abuja and other states. What did it get me? Telling one lie to another just to escape drama.

I clicked on the video link here on Nairaland and it says "DECODE ERROR"...i decided to go NEXT LEVEL by watching it directly on YouTube and it refused to play. A round dot that buffers before a video plays only kept turning round and round aimlessly like buhari's government. Y'all see why this next level thing by APC is a scam.

If the data and call network of Glo is like their tv commercials, it would have been the best network to use in Africa. But unfortunately, their network is crappy!

obailala:
Okay so how exactly does this prove that he's a scammer?... He demanded $1000 for a service whose details were spelt out in that chat image.

We're all aware of even visa agents that charge even more just to help you fill a simple for which you can fill yourself. Patronising his service isn't mandatory, you could go through it yourself or try other agent. I'm still curious to find out how he's a scammer in this, maybe I really didnt understand what I read.

Why waste time replying that ednut1? His brothers are busy doing yahoo+ and scamming Australians and Americans plus burying peoples' daughters in their bedrooms just to get rich. Here is a guy asking to be paid for delivering a service and he calls him a scammer because one "wide-nosed mosquito" said so.

Groovenaija360:
Dis guy

What is his source of income

Ritualists everywhere na Igbo man sef

If we check now, you follow for people who are all over his handle on Instagram dropping their account information and begging him for money

Nice gestures!

derrydinny:
ipob women and shamelessness are like 5&6

At least she's "facking" her husband unlike ewedurian women who "Bleep" their agbo and monkeytail customers