₦airaland Forum

How would any of you feel if you scored 350 in JAMB and somebody that scored 300 is being awarded as the highest scorer.

Read the Guinness book of records and you will see a lot of false awards being given to Americans.

Because Oprah is American, does that make her richer than Deinde Fernandez?

Dangote himself is saying he's not even sure he's the richest in Africa.

That means if everything is well calculated, he Dangote will make it to the top 10, while Oprah will make it to the top 20.

By the way, it's not the responsibility of the rich to provide for the poor. All this corporate social responsibility thing is just a marketing strategy used by corporate bodies to get more customers and thereby rip the public off some more.

Abeg O! If I get four head and I see say them dey hail somebody wey get three head for China as the man with the most heads, I go rear my heads O!

How dem go use chicken do thanksgiving when turkey dey yanfu-yanfu?

Julius Berger dey build bridge je-je, Nigerians say no dem must give local engineering firm.

Julius Berger has seen the best roads all over the world. The best roads these local construction firms have seen are the best in Nigeria built by Julius Berger. Then some people will say building bridge is like planting maize.

Anyway, I have said it. Once I enter government, foreign ministers, foreign companies, I say even foreign traditional rulers.

Only those Nigerians like Emeagwali that have gone proven themselves in the world stage can have a say in this country. Mediocrity based on catchement area must stop. It must stop for us to move forward.

Somebody has to spend a long time in jail, and somebody else has to be sacked from the Standards organization of Nigeria.

Absolutely no sense or direction at all.

@samsilo

please help me tell them. Because I have said it and I will say it again. I don't think I can shake hands with a virgin. To me it's like some kind of disability or handicap.

Some may say "I saw a blind man in Kano"

Others may say "I saw a leper at Benin-Ore road"

and I will say "I saw an adult virgin Sokoto".

I just believe they have some very severe form of Social Handicap which is worse than being blind, deaf or dumb.

All this kidnapping is just a facade that the MEND created to divert attention from the real business of Crude Oil bunkering.

It is just unfortunate that all these other groups have taken over what MEND began.

The terrorist group MEND is more interested in bunkering 300,000,000 barrels of Crude Oil per day and making $4.5 billion per year. The kidnapping business was only used as as misdirection to draw attention away from the real cheese. It is just sad that other violent gangs who do not have the resources or facilities to engage in bunkering have now taken this kidnapping racket to a whole new level.

But still we have to go to the source. How come we see yahoo boys and other 419 everyday and we don't excuse them on the basis of the current situation in Nigeria? Why haven't we blamed Obasanjo for Yahoo-Yahoo?

It was the MEND that imported and instituted this crime into Nigeria and they must pay!

@Afam

have you ever read "Der Judenstatt" (the jewish state)? It is written by Herzl. One of the major founding fathers of the new make believe European-jews. When you finish reading that book, your eyes will open.

When you realise how deep the rabbit hole goes, then you will realise how futile all these "from my inbox" efforts are.

You will find out how they first considered Uganda, then they later chose Argentina, but finally settled for Palestine.

When you read that book, you will realise how much trouble the Arabs are really in. And you will begin to thank God for Africa and South America that they were struck off the list.

So just rest and thank God that Uganda wasn't chosen. The Ugandans would have been the Palestinians of today, and the Nigerians would have been suffering the wrath of the Iraqis.

If Argentina had been chosen, the argentinians would have been suffering the fate of the Palestinians of today and the Brazilians would have been in the stead of the Iraqis.

So thank God for that divine change of mind. And please go and read "The Jewish State" so that you might know that the suffering of the Arabs has just begun and that these quasi-Jews really have nothing personal against the Arabs, they are just taking the necessary steps as outline in the manual of how to form THE JEWISH STATE.

Well, all of you that have been invited, when you get to the bush, don't forget to rep Nairaland.

In case there's anything to vote on, Nairaland too will mobilise its 100,000 members towards voting in your favour. Good luck to y'all.

Ah! In this world. We're in. They have not been known for rape so far because about all their hostages are male. Kidnapper and rapist, all na criminal.

Abi you nor know say na one day armed robbers decide to begin rape too. In the old times, it used to be just rob and go.

@MILITIA

Yes I'm in the right corner O! Independence was the biggest mistake the British ever made.

But like I said, it is not too late for us to help them undo that mistake. We can start signing a petition online. When we have obtained 3 million signatories, that's 60% of Nigerian internet users and that sample population is enough to represent the entire Nigerian population.

So when we have the required number, we send it to Gordon Brown and wait while the british house debates upon it. The only thing is that I wish Lord Lugard could come back. Now that was a man with an Iron Hand.

I miss colonialism. If we were still under colonial rule, it would have been us in Iraq fighting the insurgents. And I don't think it'd be necessary to give us body armour, humvees or land rovers.

O why? Why did Azikiwe and his gang have to come with their big mouths and ruin everything?! Why! Why!! Why!!!

Na wah O! People are undergoing mental and physical torture, others are discussing racial features.

Well a chinese couple has given birth to a negroid featured child.

Let's more importantly hope that these beasts did not rape the child.

I place my bet on Rabbi Dylan. $3,000. Do you take cash or credit card?

By the way, I must point out your mistake my dear bookie. You mentioned some Rabbi more than once. Some of them are the same person using different IDs please make due corrections.

This new strategy is a modification of the original plan by the Obasanjo Administration to place bounties of N1million each on the head of each terrorist.

Below is an adaptation of a message I earlier sent to my brother Jakumo about this plan that was later called off because of the calculated casualty that would have ensued:


"it is with a heavy heart I write to you. I want you to realise that there are thousands of Niger-Deltans in the Nigerian Army. The fact that they are not members of MEND doesn't make them any less at home. They know the terrain as well as you and I. Do not also forget that a lot of Niger-Delta indigenes are getting sick and tired of their terrorist adventures. These locals will very easily be recruited as counter militia.

Let me tell you one thing you do not realise about southerners in general, they'll do about anything for money. Let alone when it's legal. If the government agrees to just put a ransom of N1 million on the head of each one of those Niger-Delta terrorists, I tell you, the military will have no need to go there. At that rate, N10 billion ($83 million) will get the heads of 10,000 terrorists. I want y'all to think about this.

Indigenes will kill and kill till there are no more to kill, and they will start killing innocent Ijaws to disguise them as members of MEND in order to get the bounty.


Let me make it clear to you that MEND and its associates made well over $4,500,000,000 last year from oil bunkering alone.
Those members of MEND that are lower in the chain of command and have not benefitted much from the bunkering money and the kidnap ransom will betray and kill their fellows to present them for N1 million on each head. Various methods will be used including poisoning. I'm telling you, at the end of the day, more than 2 million lives will be lost without the Nigerian military firing a single shot.

Let me tell you that before Obasanjo left, he was considering this option but for the massive collateral damage. Do you know how many starving youths will welcome this business opportunity? This new job opening opportunity? Those that have been terrorised by MEND over the past months.

Obasanjo would have even patted himself in the back and claim that he created jobs.

I keep saying that the government is trying to employ the least harsh method here and MEND keeps spreading propaganda that it is because of their weapons arsenal. No be only arsenal. Na Chelsea."

--End of Quote--


Anyway, back to the topic at hand, I realise this is the state government's own plan to make that earlier idea less harsh. But even here you have to realise there's a catch.

This is nothing but a "remix" of the US witness protection program. The first few terrorists that give themselves up for the N1 million will provide information and help to track down and eliminate the other terrorist cells. It's not such a bad plan as well as it is thoroughly thought through.

God Help Nigeria.

Religion should be eradicated by banning religious inheritances. That is, parents must be prevented from imposing their religions on their offspring. But the children should not be forced to abandon a religion or way of worship which they choose by themselves.

Ever friendly Jakumo,

the decade long struggle has ended with the formation of MEND. The NDPVF would have carried on a meaningful struggle but in came MEND, and they monetised the struggle to what we have today.

From Crude Oil Bunkering alone, MEND diverts an average of 300,000 bpd. Given that they sell at less than the market price, at $50/barrel, they have been making close to $15,000,000 daily.

In a year,
$4,500,000,000.
In Naira,
N500,000,000,000.

How much of this staggering sum has been used to curb pollution, alleviate the suffering of the Niger-Delta families, or utilized in community development projects? This is all aside from the millions they make from the incessant kidnappings.


Now, let's step away from money for a minute and talk about allegiances. Look around the world and you will realise that there is no rebel group that the US has sponsored that it has not turned around and destroyed. The Bin Laden, Farah Aidid, Saddam, Mobutu, all of them were once instruments to the US. Yet immediately their enemies decided to shake hands with the US, it marked their very destruction. We know the M.O.

If I tell you that negotiations are underway for the US to provide intelligence for the destruction of MEND, exchange for the government to sideline Shell and favour Haliburton and Chevron on oil deals, you will scuff.

But negotiation are on for assistance of Nigeria in squashing the MEND terrorists in exchange for Nigeria leaving OPEC and giving preferential treatment to US Oil Companies over China's.

Well, make we dey see dey go. The struggle that MEND is engaged in, that has enabled them to "kolobi" $4,500,000,000, the struggle that enables them to be using cutlass to slap kidnapped oil workers on the face, the struggle that has led them to be threatening, robbing and killing people of the Niger-Delta, the struggle that has finally climaxed in the kidnap of a 3 year old baby, they will explain it to us very soon.

God Save Nigeria!

yaaawwwwwwwwwn

Well, I learnt of ObaSansus
(pronounced Oba-San-soos) noun:
This is a type of Census process in which people are carefully enumerated in some areas while others do not even see the Census officials. A system whereby the enumerators were asking how many toilets and television sets were in my house, while caring less to carry out a headcount in other areas.

The process then leads to a declaration of results in which a state like Kano, which was almost catching up to the population of Lagos more than a decade ago, becomes divided into two states and today just one half of those two states has far more than the population of Lagos.

Use eg: during the last ObaSansoos, there were rumours that enumerators demanded bribes before counting some citizens.

Well, now that the US has set itself against OPEC, we may as well start selling our Crude Oil in the more valuable and stable euro, rather than continue with the slipping and sliding dollar.

But first, it is adviseable that we dump all foreign reserves held in the dollar and opt for the euro instead. As this new Oil trade in euro will increase it's value and simultaneously reduce the value of the dollar as there will be less demand for the dollar.

That makes sense. I see no reason why a German would be buying crude from Nigeria in dollars when none of them actually use the dollar in the real sense of it.

I guess the Petrodollar system was initially viable when the dollar was very stable. But such is no more the case right now.

I suggest you watch more TV. What even happened to your large appetite? You use binge eat a lot before. Anyway, whatever you do, stop trying to use people on Nairaland as replacement for Shannon.

Take up some other hobby too besides TV. Get yourself a Wii or PS 3.

Thank you there. Nigerians don't want to agree that their leaders are sourced from among them. They believe these their leaders are imported from Mars.

Thank you there. Nigerians don't want to agree that their leaders are sourced from among them. They believe these their leaders are imported from Mars.

@davidylan

Moyinoluwa, there is no way you could have made a light hearted joke. Your heart is heavy with depression and hardened with an array of opinionated views to select from.

There is no way you could make a lighthearted jest.

Leave people make dem dey misyarn about wetin dem no sabi.

MEND is a TERRORIST Group. MEND is far worse than the NDPVF because MEND is the first terrorist group in Nigeria to seek weapons and training from foreign governments. They are also the originators of the kidnapping. Haven't you people ever wondered why they have never kidnapped any Haliburton or Chevron staff?

Abeg leave all these people make dem dey misthink.

@dblock
My dear friend dblock, you are on the internet. Search for the chronology of Niger-Delta kidnappings and you will see what share belongs to MEND.

Whethe they are nice guys to you personally or not, they have turned an evil leaf in the history of Nigeria: RANSOM KIDNAPPING.

Wait. All this shambolic monologues you're having above, does it excuse your post?

"DENEX, IT SEEMS YOU HAVE A PERSONAL VENDETTA AGAINST THE US."

"EVER BEEN DENIED VISA?"

are these not the types of hypocritical displays you keep complaining about. You condemn personal attacks yet you are the champion of personal attacks on this forum.

moyinoluwa adenuga, you have grown to become that hypocrite DAVID DYLAN.

"DENEX, IT SEEMS YOU HAVE A PERSONAL VENDETTA AGAINST THE US."

"EVER BEEN DENIED VISA?"

that statement was yours. In fact it was an entire post from you. O sacred and issue focusing davidylan, I wonder what that has to do with discussing Oil Cartels.

And the rate at which you keep laughing about Nigerians lining up for visas and mocking them to send their families over to the other side of the atlantic, you forget that your own queueing has not ended yet.

Maybe is you spent more time on the tasks that would enhance the speed of approval for your greencard, maybe you wouldn't be this uptight and frustrated.

@blackthot

you will be very sorry for that your post. So you don't know that once it comes to Arab/Israeli issues you can't make neutral comments?

It is either you are with the Israelis and are completely anti-Arab, or with the Arabs and branded an anti-Semite.

Well, I'm afraid it's too late. They've come for you so better answer the question and welcome to the world of quote, unquote, requote and subquote.

God help you.

@davidylan

you should have simply told me that you were looking for a post to quote, unquote, requote and subquote. See how small your initial post was, three lines. Before I gave you raw material to work with.

I see that you Multiple Personality Disorder has started again.

You came to this thread saying Oh why is America trying to do this. Next thing the nut just loosened and here you are.

It's amazing the way your psychoanalysis is going. MPD is already confirmed but I'm still trying to establish SAD and childhood abuse.

Let go some more. You're proving to be quite a formidable patient.

Dearest jakumo,

it is with a heavy heart I write to you. I want you to realise that there are thousands of Niger-Deltans in the Nigerian Army. The fact that they are not members of MEND doesn't make them any less at home. Do not also forget that a lot of Niger-Delta indigenes are getting sick and tired of the adventure of these terrorists. They will very easily be recruited as counter militia.

Let me tell you one thing you do not realise about southerners in general, they'll do about anything for money. Let alone when it's legal. If the government can just put a ransom of N1 million on the head of each one of those Niger-Delta terrorists, I tell you, the military will have no need to go there.

Indigenes will kill and kill till there are no more to kill, and they will start killing innocent Ilaws to disguise them as members of MEND in order to get the bounty.

Those members of MEND that are lower in the chain of command and have not benefitted much from the bunkering money and the kidnap ransom will kill their fellows and present them to get N1 million on each head. Various methods will be used including poisoning. I'm telling you, at the end of the day, more than 2 million lives will be lost without the Nigerian military firing a single shot.

Let me tell you that before Obasanjo left, he was considering this option but for the massive collateral damage. Do you know how many starving youths will welcome this business opportunity?

I keep saying that the government is trying to employ the least harsh method here and MEND keeps spreading propaganda that it is because of their weapons arsenal. No be only arsenal. Na Chelsea.