₦airaland Forum

uplawal: In Court wedding,you are made to obey laws that are against Allahs laws,thereby setting partner with Allah,I did Islamic wedding,everything in my marriage is dictated by the Quran,i mean everything,and am enjoying it,not afraid of mathna,if they come fine,if they dont fine,all is willed by Allah,Alamdullilahi.

If i have issue with my husby, we iron it out with Quran and Sunnah,its sweet this way honestly, i don't know why muslims are running from sweetness of Islam?

Hmmmn! I just cant imagine you with a mathna

Logicboy03: Sweetness of Islam? Should I how you a video of a muslim woman that was happy that she wasnt cheated out of her inheritance with Islamic laws (she would have gotten less as a woman)?


I know the topic is court marriage but I just wanted to give an example where islam is not sweet when it comes to family matters

As a good Muslim,she would have contentment and wv that,everything would be sweet.

thanks

Too much emotion on this issue.

You cant be gay and be Muslim

You cant be Muslim and gay.

The guy is confused. After this media hype,you would most probably never hear of him again.

And so shall it be.

Logicboy03: Yes, it is funny to see people hurt over something they shouldnt care about in the first place. The hypocrisy is funny.


That is not sadism.


Sadism is believing that you will be happy in heaven while non-believers like me will be burn (with our skins regenerating continuously) in hell.

If only you knew that the skin regeneration can be proven scuentifically.

Since no matter what is said,you wldnt listen,I may just stop spending my time here.

Hypocrite. Does d bible not also place d man as d head?

And about being unreasonable,I think u are d dolt here.

Do you mean that if a man sends u packing three different times or is plain silly enough to not follow the basic steps of the three divorces allowed, u wld still go back to him begging?

I see your uptienth attempt at being relevant. It must bother on some psycho issues needing dire attention.
I wld offer you help if only u'd admit..u wldn't,unfortunately.

Saint paris: Lol, but women are property in your religion. Many Muslims have argued that in Islam the husband is responsible to provide for the family and the wife is not required to contribute with a penny. Is like She is to provide a service for him, (give birth to HIS children, satisfy his sèxual needs, take care of HIS property, etc) and in exchange he is required to maintain her. Is there any difference between this dynamism and that of a master and his slave?
Even your fellow sisters in Saudi Arabia are been tracked like they're some kinda BMW property

Your last statement is quite unreasonable or heartlessly indifferent to what a typical muslim woman goes through, like the girl in my 1st post

Saint paris: Good, makes a lil bit of sense however i've to disagree with you on "not Good Man- Good Woman - High posssibility of brekup. The man looses as the woman has opportunity to meet a better Person (if shes careful, she may end up as in scenario 1 above)". Under the Sharia women are not allowed to divorce even if their husband beats them. The decision to divorce rest only on man's whims. I mean really, can a woman really divorce her husband on phone or through SMS?
And in your last statement divorce maybe frowned at as it should be in every reasonable society, but in case of islam is quite easy to get for the man that is. And in case of a woman been divorced for been uchaste is not quite true. I think you know quite well the fate of an adulterous woman in proper islam setting.

No it's not obvious, clearly zhuqr(i hope i got the spelling right) whom i think is shia clearly disagrees with your sunni style of divorce so it's not obvious. But they like you still force their women to marry another man, the man divorces her before she cann get back to her original husband. That option is clearly screwed up. Do you see what that option is doing/did to the student in my 1st post?

A woman can divorse her husband. Stop saying things u av no knowledge of.

The case above is an isolated one. Many laws are given with everything being equal. If he was a good Muslim who understands his dean,he wldnt have treated her the way he did. It appears they are very young too and immaturity is playing in their life. If you wldnt be using ur critical lens I wonder what advice you would have for this married student and her hot tempered husband.

The law would be very beneficial to those who live an absolutely Islamic life for with that,she'd be marrying a man of good character and who would follow the dictates of Qur'an and ahadith that emphasise being good to the woman and looking to the good sides of her even when she is seen as bad.

Logicboy03:


Na "strong" thing be dat!

You claim to have read the Qur'an. what do you know of the position of Islam on gay marriages

But what of the hadith that prevents lying even when joking? Wldnt these fall into that category?


I remember though of Nasreddin Khoja..he is the Akpors of d arab world I read a book on him having short stories-all jokes.

One of th3 stories-
One day he was on the branch of a tree,cutting it. A man passed by and told him if he continued to cut it that way,he wld fall. He didnt listen and later fell.

Then on another day he saw the man and asked him the day he(Nasreddin)was going to die. The man said he didnt know. He told d man he was sure the man cld tell d future as how cld he av known he was going to fall from d tree.

After much troubles the man told him that a day is coming when his donkey was going to stamp three times and then he wld die.

The day it happened Nasreddin fell off his mount. Passers by wondered why he kept on and he told them he was dead..he cldnt av bn alive.

Sorry..its been long I read it. It sounded more interesting then.


Another one-
He was a teacher and one day he entered a class and asked the students if they knew what he was going to teach them..they chorused Yes. He left saying,why woulx I teach you what you already know.

On another day he asked them and they all said No and he said why would I teach u what you dont know.

They planned that some would say yes and others No the next time. When they did,He told them the people who knew should teach those who didnt....

Boring??

@Op what is d obsession about

Does d thought of gay ppl make u so happy that u had to open 3 threads for it? Smh.

fellis: Hmm. Just look at how our tolerant and loving Christian brothers are displaying their tolerance and love on this thread.

And to think that they should have seen this as bad? To have shown their godly side and condemn this? HYPOCrItes,many of them are.

Funny enough d non-Muslims are licking their lips over this.

It is d become-as-I-have-become syndrome.

God save us from that.

Oh sorry. I av to bring ds up again.

Polygamy can be her choice or not.

She can sign a contract b4 marriage on that. She can make a contract disallowing him from marrying other women apart from her.

She is however not allowed to ask him to divorce a wife he's had in order to marry him.

I remember reading Jarus's story too and dat non-muslim guy who experienced the power of kursiyy.

When asked if he wld consider Islam,his reply was stunning. How I wish he isnt so strong headed

@Kabsun,do I disagree wv u? NO!

Another thing many people dont talk about is d ability of the man 2 satisfy their s.exual need.

There was a thread on the home page not long ago of a man who died after his wives r.aped him. He had too many of them and while demanding their rights,he gave up the ghost.

The question to ask is,why marry many women when you wouldnt be able 2 meet their needs.

@Sino,that part where u mentioned d alfas craziness..lol.

I see some who claim to be alfa begging on the streets..they appear possesed.

I only saw the rukiah being performed on a woman. I must av bn in junior secondary schl then. That was the first time I knew of them. She was making some funny noise and as we watched,some elderly pple sent us away so it wont enter us!

I was shocked mehn!

Frostyzone: Hello, we are in the 21st century. Stop thinking like a cave man.

Not thinking like a cave man should mean that u bring intellectualism into d discourse and not that calaiming to be in d 21st century make u modern.

acidtalk: Allah is the All Mighty All Knower and every single knowledge, Law or Intellect HE wanted man to practice and know have been passed to the Holy Quran or through the Hadith and Sunnah of The Holy Prophet. No where did Allah Prescribe or permit any other form of marriage aside Nikkiah.

The Court marriage is Man made law but that of Islamic (Nikkiah) is ALLAH's own Laws.

Don't forget Allah forbids all sins except shirk (associating partners with him) going for a court marriage is as good as also putting the marriage under the laws and supervision of man.

Actually,everything is allowed or else otherwise stated. That is d reason many pple ask questions.

acidtalk: Anything Outside Nikiah is HARAM (Forbidden) and Bidiah (modernization)

If u mean premarital and extra marital affairs,u are right. Anything outside Nikkah is haram and a bid'ah(innovation).


Note. Bid'ah doesnt mean modernisation

The above is really good.

Many Nigerians who have court marriages also have the Nikkah. So they eventually meet all the Islamic requirements for narriage.

Going to the court goes beyond documentation by Nigerians. Many see it as d way to become the legal wife. In case he dies,they get his property.

The law also makes her the only wife and if he marries another woman,he wld face a jail term. Even though it is said that no one was ever convicted in Lagos state.

To what Islam might say. A marriage contract in Islam can include that he marries her only but to attach a jail term would be unIslamic. She doesnt also get all he left as there are stipulations on how a man's property is 2 be shared. So,again, it is wrong.

In ess3nce,all that I know many people hope to benefit from going to the court may not be there after all if they want to live an Islamic life.

kabsun: I hav followd everytin on this thread wit kin intrest. I must comfes that doels is a genius. Alhamdulillah.
The point I want to make is that deols nd others wit similar opinion on polygny shld take things easy and pray for d best for themselves.
Who knows.... neither polyg nor monogy wil guarantee one marital success n hapiness.
I hav seen many happy polyg families as wel as many monog families. The opposite is also there.
Matrimonial hapiness is.far beyond that. I pray that doels n odas get the best husband for.themselvs n I pray they also cooool down and be less personal n emotional wen.discussin this issues. I raisd ma cap for doels.

Thanks for the prayer and advice. Much appreciated


Women are usually the victims when things go wrong in marriages. Their suffer suffer increases when polygyny is involved. It is understandable that we get emotional.

But I dont like it and will never accept it when pple make it seem like polygyny is d rule. I have heard of many instances where some so called Muslim brothers go about disturbing monogamous muslims,calling them less of Jihadists if they dont marry up to four wives.

Things arent always as twisted as d Op puts it.

Many of the girls in category B are kind hearted and good and would more likely make good wives and mothers. What goes in ur mind,who you are are reflected in both your character and outward appearance.

I am not d type a son wld bring a category A to. dem no dey fear?

I wasnt angry though. Neither did I call you khawaarij. I said that is how it starts. Or doesnt disbelief mean kufr anymore?

And u did say that my position was tantamount to kufr.

I thnk u'd rather face the issues than make claims to what constitutes kufr as u know that is quite sensitive just like you wldnt want d tag, khawarij.

Those pictures are disgusting.

Smh @ how sunnis must be mentioned for shias to defend themselves

Funny enough op may never learn that the Muslims of NL are against the practice above. He wld probably use it against Muslims d nxt time he converses wv one.

Interested in what people have 2 say

The idea is simple enough. Dont take your wives as property you can dispose of at whim. Think b4 making decisions 4 they may haunt you later on.


A man who keeps divorcing his wife may need to lose her 2 someone else b4 ever realising her worth.

@ Olawalebabs,

A man would have to be just with regards to material gifts. For example a woman wv 10 children and one wv 2 cant be expected to get the same things from him. If he does give them the same amount of money for example,he would have cheated the woman with ten children and be punished for his actions.

On the other hand he cannot control the kind of affection he has for these women. With that,he cannot be blamed but this affection shldnt keep him from sharing his time equally among them.

For example they may have to share the nights and who does his cooking. Giving the one he likes more of this time wldnt be right and he cld be punished for that.

Any man who favors a wife over the others would be raised half paralysed.

I dont want that for anyone I like and wouldnt want it for my husband hence my wanting to av hm to myself

Gma2012: Now back to the choice of type of Man or woman, you can choose and have selection criteria but do not discountenance the advice of the Prophet as regard selection criteria.

Experience has shown that most women around 30 years and above have had to trimmed down their long selection criteria they had at let say age of 24years. A man could still be choosy at around age 35years but not so women. Above all we should have faith in Allah and consult him when presented with choice between two things. ( apology to everybody for any repetition since I have not really followed the thread from the beginning )

What criteria are you talking about?

@paragraph 2,I dont understand ur point. Are you talking as a muslim or as a Nigerian?last I checked,to marry early is as prescribed for men as it is for women in Islam.

Gma2012: Noooo! It is not to scare anybody but for us to exercise caution because it is tantamount to disbelief for a Muslim to go against what is in the qur'an. You could keep your faith intact while praying for the best possible outcome?
I think if we really care about one another as a true Muslim should then the right of a Neighbour as defined in islam mandated us to advice ourselves and encourage ourselves on every situation.

Yes not everybody is like that sister, that is true but who is going to tell us that we are different if not the owner of existence Himself. He use to speak to Mankind via qur'an and other means when the prophets were in the world But the door through prophecy is closed till the day of resurrection. Yes we could fashion any standard for ourselves but who defines those standard if not the creator and the fashioner himself. The west as of today have their standard when it comes to marital institution but are they winning, divorce is at the highest and people are scared from marriage. Many women whom out of setting a different standard for themselves have becomes Jesus women (given up on men and are waiting for jesus ) and those who are not are roaming the street waiting in ambush for those men who claim they are monogamist. The French surgeon who won Nobel price in 1976 says a monogamist is he who claim he eats once a day but in between meals he visits different snacks shops to make up.

So my sister Allah was not joking in the qur'an when he says ' This day, I have perfected your religion for you, completed My Favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islām as your religion'

I hope I would be able to share the pain of an old family friend who is a baptist Christian about the so much hated polygamy. Have a nice day.

I disagree that it is tantamount to disbelief. You seem to not want to get my point. this is how some pple become khawaarij by calling others kaafir and start causing confusion.

Polygamy is not compulsory in Islam. It is a choice!

You can choose to practise it and not choosing is not a sin nor tantamount to disbelief.

That is my point!Islam allows a man to marry up to 4 wives.it didnt make it mandatory on them to do so.

Dont twist my words abeg. I ddnt even say it is wrong for anyone to practice it..

Pray you dont land at Muritala MA in d afternoon. With the sight from above u wld want to go back.


While I agree there's been some development. It just isnt good enough.

[quote author=olawalebabs][/quote]brb

^^I get ur point. But is that to scare us from continuing to dislike the institute of polygamy?

I beg ur pardon, not every1 is like that sister. Not every1 goes for whatever is available. Many people have standards. and they either get them or nothing at all.

SO it doesnt really matter what happened to that sister. Preach what you think is right and leave pple to decide what they think is best for them.