₦airaland Forum

iListen:
My dear brother/sister...it's surely not about dropping sperm, but this is the reality of the story we are reading. We can't give Mike to the dogs, we can only hope he develops his sixth sense as the story progresses.

The rest is entertaining though I find the women's stupidity sad but I take seriously parenthood, even if he is broke at least one pampers one wipe to show some responsibility, his mother sef has never gone to see the child, na only to dey answer greetings from babes

Benblaq:
Eketem if you don't calm down, you might have high B.P

My own is that Mike should start banging the nanny oh, he needs a fresh blood afterall.

As for the management of Amaka's business, Mike should not even think of it cos she is not human.

Ehen eketem, if you were to be in Mike's shoe (considering his odeal all these while), would you have thought of your baby in a safe arm already?

Make una no chew me sha.

Fatherhood is serious responsibility, I find it irritating how he thinks he is a father because he pops in once a while, not even one single wipe, kids are expensive.

He is still jumping around having unprotected sex to bring in more kids he cannot take care of

SifonAbasi:
Thank you.
I was working at a printing press and the pay was nothing to write home about.
It's not like I was lazy or jobless.

I had a mother to care for and also schooling.

Sorry I Judged you, I don't know how painful the situation may have been to the extent that sleeping with him for cash would have been the only option.

Deed has been done, you have to be honest with your husband else you will be a permanent slave to this man who will still rat you out when he is done with you

iListen:
Hahaha...pepper never rest for the bros.

So having a child is just about dropping sperm abi? Pepper never rest why won't he calm down look for a job and support his child be responsible instead of fuc-king up and down then showing up once in a while to play with the child for 5 minutes


I don't care about the silly grown women who are not afraid of HIV, a child is a responsibility, he cannot have a child be acting recklessly and then show up once in a while not to contribute but to be fighting with the mother

He was not your last bustop you could have washed, cleaned and done menial labor to see yourself through school instead you chose to prostitute.

Legally there is nothing he can do to you if you insist on refunding his loan, morally he could tell your husband, I suggest you come clean to your husband your self because if you let him blackmail you into having sex now he will blackmail you again

BIXYBABE:
Man must pay d bill.....he's d head of the family. But wife can also help if she wish or maybe they both agree on it. My own view though

In 1860

Ebowo:
Wrong reason to marry

Excuse me? Is a woman not an adult? So it is wrong for a man to want to share bills but right for a grown woman to be fully dependent

My son My son but you have never bought one single pampers, only to be having unprotected sex up and down. You think it's saliva and fighting up and down they use to raise kids abi?

People who are confused do not know who Shehu sani is. Hehehehehe

This is a man who will be claiming activist and be organising fake protest marches so he could get sponsorship from foreign countries.

He will invite people and claim he has a meeting, you will go there see cameras and people with t-shirts next thing he will have BBC Hausa of VOA taking pictures and you will now be involved in a "protest " you know nothing about.

Shehu is and has always been a scam I am very sure Saraki and Co know him very well

Nigerian women read and have sense.

See the same men shouting divorce is a sin and how women must accept and tolerate in laws shouting divorce over issues that are not even one tenth of what you women complain about.

The solution to your being treated like crap is in your hands ohhhhhhh. If you continue to accept to be second class humans na choice

Maxvasia:
I am surprised no one quoted this horrendous comment of urs. Presumption from the depths of LAWMA thrash! I had to go back to read the post cos wen I read ur comment, it made me wonder if i read it at all at first. Is there any part of the post that suggested he is spending money on other women? U just conveniently remixed the post to suit the modus operandi of ur saliva filled brain. Next time read well or if u cannot read at all, just keep it moving. I am sure u are a female cos no man would show so much abysmal imbecility/lunacy.

After much venom please kindly point out where you saw me write that he was spendin money on women! Thank you

Poster you sef
You are married but keep meeting different women who are also demanding money from you, maybe that is why your wife feels she may need to finish all your money so you don't spend it on these women outside


Why is everybody trying to get money from you? Do you show off? You were even judging one of the women for drinking 3 beers meanwhile you are a married man chatting with women on social media

One mind is telling me to sit here and wait for the hypocrites who would have come to tell a wife to tolerate her in laws if the tables were turned accused her of being not accommodating to in laws.

Let me leave my pettiness aside and advise the poster to ignore the wife and her silly family. Stop meeting their demands, face your kids if you have any, save for the future, invest in a project.

When your wife is tired she will give her self brain. The kind of stupid mentality Nigerian women have about husbands, you marry a man and make it his responsibility to pull you and your family out of poverty.


People should discuss these things before marriage please

Liars, they are only sacking him because Saraki escaped they didn't sack him for failure to secure Benue and Plateau lives they want to sack him because he messed up their coup against the legislature, why didn't they call him to order in the morning when the siege was going on

sisisioge:


You don't believe that story? Hmm...I see no reason anyone would lie about committing murder o. Well, even if its a lie, guy would happily do same in real life given the chance. So many looonies roaming dear earth.

To impress gullible minds and make himself look dangerous, why do people lie? He may be some teenager who has never even touched a girl he is living his fantasies on Nairaland and you actually believe him.


It makes no sense it is a very foolish concoction, if he said it was manslaughter I may understand but to claim it was premeditated murder and he found a judge who said he empathized with him is crazy stupid and outrageous lie. I don't know how anyone would believe that immature lie even nollywood would do better

eyinjuege:
Nobody feels the woman is innocent, as she did wrong by assaulting an elderly person regardless of what she might have done ( in this case, messing up the house. That's a stupid reason to beat anyone, and definitely not a case of self defence)
People are just giving you a different perspective to the matter, and perhaps how things could be handled better.
Like I said earlier, I'm not sorry for the woman but her husband should have reported to the police the assault on his mother.
You know this is a public forum, and you really shouldn't expect everyone to sleep on the same bed and lie same side.
Anger has never helped anyone, and it's better to always be calm, and apply logic to issues. You 'fight' better that way. With the way the states are rising up against domestic violence, if that man is found guilty he could lose a lot of things, his job inclusive. His mother would have wished he never laid his hands on the wife.
He wasn't there when the assault on his mother happened, and it is all heresay to him. It's a different thing if he was there and was trying to prevent assault on his mother, but he wasn't.

The poster is a nag he go drag you taya

sisisioge:
Hmmm...the venom in the guy is too much to be fake. I think it happened. He dislikes women with a sick passion.

https://www.nairaland.com/4593493/why-killed-ex-girlfriend-detest

The venom is the reason he is fake. I even thought you personally knew about the case didn't know you just heard it from a faceless Nairaland probably teenager

adedayoa2:
ofcos she is working to support her husband but the husband still remains the head, he should forget his wife works and give her what he can afford you'll see she will definitely add her own might.

When it comes to money Nigerian women remember headship

armyofone:
Two things-
Maybe the family can't afford it or fear of them sleeping with the husband.
Op-Both of you should look for a place where she can learn during school hours.
Very fair oh-they call it parenting.

Lol @ Parenting, very true though it never ends.

I said he should find out her issues with helps and help her resolve it. She is miserable, husband is miserable, kids are miserable their current system isn't working.

Good thing is unlike a lot of men babies on nairaland this one is open to listening and learning

Elder001:
It's not only broke men that share bills with their wives.

This nairaland is somehow different from reality.

There's no correlation between the state of the economy and his choice of wife.

He can still choose to share the bills even if he's a billionaire.

Nobody wants a lazy liability.

Where did I mention broke men? I am an advocate of sharing bills any day any time. This mentality of a woman marrying a man and then turning into a minor who cannot provide basic needs for herself is something I do not understand.


I believe every adult must be able to take care of themselves and every adult must be able to cook and clean after themselves hence it is very hard for me to understand why a woman will get married and then decide a husband's money is good for spending while her own is good for saving except it this was a mutual agreement

The hypocrisy with the Nigerian gender war is both men and women are selfishly holding on to traditional norm when it suits them but wanting Co partners when it suits them. A woman will want a man to provide everything financially yet cook and clean while a man will want a wife that does all the cooking and cleaning yet shares bill. Until we are all ready to drop the 1950s mentality we will keep moving in circles

yettymuse:
OK, whilst you were dating her you weren't spending on her because............ She's miss independent huh Men like you make independent women carry calculator about... You married a woman because you want to be sharing bills? Really??

Ovoko!!!!!!!!!

Nothing wey person no go hear for this nairaland. You're depressed because you're performing your marital duties, top of which is taking the financial responsibilities of your home?
You've not even started, no kids yet and you're whining like this?

You married her because of her money.. You never chi chom chin!

Are you kidding me?
I weak abeg!...

What is wrong with marrying a partner so one can share bills?

Not every man wants a wife that will take and take, some want working wives so they won't die from high blood pressure in this economy, share goals aspirations and grow together.

His only error was not discussing with her before marriage

You should have discussed finance before marriage in black and white. Who does what? Who pays for which bill?

It is wicked for her to spend all your money while " saving " her own shebi you cannot save?


It is sad that women will want modern men who can cook and clean but when it comes to money matter they remember that a man is the head of the home.

Renegotiate your terms, do a household budget everything light water, food rent etc should be included then agree on who will do what based on income earned not based on who is a man and a woman

gare2510:
So I have been doing the babysitting and even more I get to clean the house anytime I am home and the fact I am on break doesn't mean I still don't get online and work. There are days I notice she is stressed I have take the children out to give her time to relax, these are just measures that are meant to ease the burden but doesn't solve it, get a maid so some of the workload be delegated you refused. I leave the house by 6am come back by 6pm. I am not supposed to be tired too

What exactly is her issue with the maid? That should be resolved, it is unfair to have you get home and start another brand new job.

I was like you, what helped me was tracking my spending.


Get a hard cover exercise book. Write down every source of income then budget how you can spend it building project savings included. Have one account for daily expenses then another account without cheque book or ATM where you can save towards your big projects and for the rainy day. The job may not be there forever



You can dedicate 10 or 15 person of your income to helping others, write it on that exercise book and be strict about it. When that money finishes anybody else that comes be honest and tell them you don't have.


The good thing about writing down your income and expenses is it makes whatever you spend real, you will start seeing for your self frivolous things and you will stop it by your self.

gare2510:
Thankyou all for your advice, scoldings, reassurances etc, sometimes we need to vent. At least the family forum on nairaland provides the forum without been accused of taking family matter outside. There is hope.

I like you, you are a listening man, it will get better. I wish she was reading this too so I could scold her for walking out on you. Issues can be resolved without rudeness

gare2510:
Don't draw hasty conclusions, my not agreeing with the pharmacy thing had nothing to do with killing her dreams cos I brought up the pharmacy idea but timing without plan for the kids, I suggested a maid she refused but said we will manage I told her later you will feel trapped and overburdened she did not listen, now this and I am not supportive, fair enough I have gotten some great insights from what some posters have said which I will explore. Thanks all the same

Sigh, for women having a career and having kids is more challenging. Spousal support is important , I hope you both find a balance

gare2510:
Twice I have made attempts to get a house help through an agency but she rejected, right from day 1 I told her I don't want a sit at home wife, I used to do all the helping evening going to market after work etc but all of these were never appreciated, I still help in every way possible, but for how long should we continue like this when it can be better, I have her pharmacy as part of my plans so when you talk of support I need more insights

Why can you not take care of your own kids since you are home for a few days? One would think you would be looking forward to an opportunity to bond with them.

Some women have phobia for househelps because of security and other challenges, find out what she has against helps and work with her to resolve it, don't push away her concerns on this.


I think she is at that point where she feels she hasn't achieved much and she feels somehow she is not getting enough support, case in point you telling her to go to her place of work with the kids while you will be home doing nothing.


In your first post you said you didn't support her going to learn at the pharmacy so I don't understand your current claims of supporting her dreams on this.

You don't seem supportive of her goals and aspirations and it seems she has gotten frustrated with your lack of support and is lashing out.

How can you ask her to take the kids to her work place do you take them to your own office? Are they her kids alone?


Getting a househelp who will pay?

It seems you had an agreement that she will stay home for a while then learn a trade or go back to work and now it's time you don't want to support her.

She sounds like someone tired and fed up

You both need a neutral party preferably a qualified counselor so both of you can open your mind and listen to what the other is saying and meet in the middle

Amumaigwe:
You have such wild fantasies that are incongrous with a stable and happy home. If you have not used this ideologies and built a home that has successfully transforned your children into responsible adults, then you might be living in a fools paradise.

Poor lazy jealous men with only empty pride and who reason like this. I only blame Nigerian women who have tolerated this crappie ideologies for so long giving men like you courage to spill this in public.

Only weak suffering women give sadists like you an erection. A woman is only good if she is at your mercy accepting crap.

A good marriage is not built on disrespect the idiocy of this whole mentality is your kind will shout 100percent submission with zero percent love


Nigerian women have standards you won't die

iomoge2:
don't mind him. He will send her packing as soon as he has his name on the documents.
God forbid I change the name to his name when I have children.

If we must agree, then our children will own the house with me as their next of kin.

After using his share of the money for his own family needs.

Even if the whole money was from him, it's not a crime if he puts everything in his wife's name. People do it and are happy.

Since her family has money, he wants his family to inherit the house when he passes. Nonsense.

Saying her family is buoyant. So f..king what?

Exactly, one of his poverty striken relative will come and throw her out with the kids, this is the kind of suffering women that give sick Nigerian men an erection.

This man is clearly manipulative even in the kids name she isn't safe he will simply keep the kids and kick her out she looses both the kids and the house.

She better tell her parents I am sure they warned her not to marry him but desperation and love didn't let her see road.

Small pocket, big ego. So irritating

sisisioge:
Absolutely agree!

However, we are still Africans no matter how schooled or exposed we are. Our husbands are our lords. Not our faults, our parents, our religions and our society say that's how it should be. I honestly don't have a problem with this so long as the man is fair in his dealings.

Okay na, let the African women continue to enjoy their slavery, when una taya una go find road

eyinjuege:
How you had the audacity to even mention your wife should leave a home she has labored for beggars belief.
She brought the business idea, she brought her own share of the money, you guys made money and shared it equally , you spent your own share on important matters too, she bought the land and starts building , you built your parents home which is also important, yet your mouth was not heavy enough to ask your wife to pack out?
You are a devil sir, no matter how you try to paint it. A destiny destroyer. Any body that decides not to see you evil ways will be treated same way you did your wife, you didn't want her to eat the fruit of her major.

Don't mind them gathering here as if he revealed some super secret. I only am upset that the silly women will hand over the documents to him and he will continue the empty boasting