₦airaland Forum

Bad. Why collect and not pay back?

Sleekfingers:
I don't owe him or anybody anything......why should I send him money?
Someone naked you in the market. But later gave you clothes at home to cover your unclothedness.......what would you call that ? Kindness or disgrace

Oh.. you owe him nothing but you're advising him to remain jobless? You try.

Op, can you see what those who are advising not to go back are saying? That they owe you nothing... You better use your brain.

Sleekfingers:
I don't owe him or anybody anything......why should I send him money?
Someone naked you in the market. But later gave you clothes at home to cover your unclothedness.......what would you call that ? Kindness or disgrace

Oh.. you owe him nothing but you're advising him to remain jobless? You try.

Sleekfingers:
Go back to where he was accused of stealing , arrested and detained for about 2 weeks ?
What happened to him is a big warning and a sign that something worst might happen to him , if he continue working there. ..

Ok.. since he made this post, have you sent him anything to eat?

He should go back in the meantime pending when he gets another job. At least now the boss knows he's innocent and can't do such. So if anything happens he
Won't suspect or accuse him again.

occfx:
Well to an extent you are correct, you just have to earn 5 times above minimum wage in a month and Cut Your Coat and accordingly. Nigeria uses minimum wage to cheat her citizens. A minimum wage that cannot buy one bag of rice is that one a minimum wage?

But the most important is to cut your coat accordingly... If you marry baby oku, even if you earn 1m a month she will tell you her friend uses 1m on her hair every month.

Yeah you're right. Though the baby oku instance is very unrealistic because no average man will wife such a woman. I'm talking about a regular girl. Who needs to be appreciated by her man normally.

occfx:
May I ask you, how much money is enough money in marriage? I have seen couple who earns very well and yet have financial problems and I have also seen couples who sells kiosk and taxi driving living happily as if the world belongs to them. I no come understand.

Just have a high stable income and business on the side that will be generating steady income. this will require hardwork which is why I said young guys should strive to build their finance to a reasonable level and invest before going into marriage.

jessylaurel:
Exactly. He should show that he's capable. An igbo can't be dissing out the useless question he's asking.

Abi nnem .

Marriage will suck you dry in naija. So, relocate. Work hard and make more money then come back and marry her.

Make sure you do your research on which country to go to so you don't go and get stranded over there.

Adexgentle005:
Dem beg this landlord taya him no hear. Dem don find place stay. Not my children.

Oh.. it is well.

No, I didn't mean your children. I'm saying God should help his children ( the man and his family).

Landlords these days too dey mean.
Almost every family is facing this issue of ejection.

Abeg, if a man no get his own house, me I no marry o.

Go back for now while looking for another one. Better than sitting at home and begging cos you don't know when you'll get another job.

Also this is an avenue to raise the issue of salary increment.

Iamzik:
There's this joy when your wife dash you money. Abi men no need joy?

Yes a woman can dash her man money. Nothing dey there. It's you men that are making it look like it's an abomination for a man to gift his wife money.

Adexgentle005:
You have said it all. I was looking helplessly when landlord came to chase my neighbor away around 4am because he couldn’t pay his house rent and was given quit notice. Quit notice don expire and baba still dey the house. It wasn’t funny sha. Na Bills and responsibility you go meet for marriage!

Eeiyaa.. so pathetic.
Where are they now?
Ha God help your children.

seanwilliam:
But from the look of thing , largest part of his earnings goes to paying house bills . And I know as a woman, you still expect your man to have investments/savings for the future and plan ahead on how you’ll take care of kiddos.

With all this, knowing fully well he barely has anything left , would you still expect him to give you ‘extra cash’ time to time while you’re working and literally don’t contribute financially to house upkeep?.



Teach me how to navigate this.

According to him the woman is making up the 40k he gives her from her own purse. So she already shares in the upkeep therefore it still makes sense appreciate with a token her with a token. No matter how small, it's something.

There's this joy when your husband dash you money. It gives one this sense of assurance.

Mind you, some men that complain they don't have money will still go outside and be dashing small small girls money. So if dash your wife too, no biggies.

emmybobo1:
The women I see on the island everyday are way above you both in class and beauty

You don't know me so don't conclude yet.

seanwilliam:
from the look of thing , he doesn’t have extra money to cater for her ‘wants’.
He already pays all the bills ,

Now, are you suggesting he gives all to his wife in order to make her happy while neglecting savings and investments with the remaining money for their prospective children?

Are you saying he should basically live to please her and ignore plans for their future ?

I’m eager to learn from you

I'm not saying he should empty his purse for her. A little cash from time to time will go a long way. It will make her feel cherished and loved.

emmybobo1:
When it comes to sex and woman, I have seen it all. Nothing pertaining to that ever move me. I’m so much engrossed in my career pursuit that sex sounds despicable to me. I mean what else do I need to gain from sex, it’s all vain Abeg. I prefer chilling with a cold bottle of best cream than being with a woman

LoL.. maybe no woman gree for you again.

If you see me, you will pee for pant. Forget!

emmybobo1:
you are only making mouth, do you think most men in marriage care much about sex.
If you marry someone like me I swear you’ll beg for sex and still not have it.

Story!

Was there any agreement that you'll be paid during or after the training period?

Look, whenever you go for any job trainings, there should be a concrete agreement on the terms of the training stated clearly and signed by both parties so you know what you're going in for and what to expect.

What are the terms and conditions of the training.? Will I be paid or it's going to be on freelance?These are the simple questions you should have asked during the interview if at all it wasn't stated in your letter or mentioned in the interview. You ask. Not after the whole thing, you'll now start expecting and asking questions.

For them not to have mentioned it, it means there was probably no arrangement for such provisions.You on the other hand who should have enquired went ahead assuming it will be automatic.

OlujobaSamuel:
I also suggested same idea to my church and it was accepted.
So many got relieved from cash wahala through that method

Correct!!!

You said your father doesn't provide. Who's sponsoring you in school? Are you the one sponsoring yourself?

Now, let me tell you. if you think it's rosy out there with everyone your age, then you're deceiving yourself.
Dont let what you see around deceive you unless you want to join bad gangs.

Stay put like you have been advised and finish your school. Then you can talk of getting a job.
However if you feel getting a job will relieve you of whatever pressure being mounted on you, then go look for a legit job that you will be doing codedly so you can have pocket money for yourself.

I no say na lack of money dey make you feel depressed.

It didn't really have a negative effect on my own church as most people resolved to online offering and there were no glitches in bank transfers that period as the few times I did, it always went through .

For me, it was fairly bearable as I didn't get to feel the cash crunch that much cos I always go to meet the church for cash while I do a transfer of the money to the church s account. So it really helped me a lot and reduced the number of times I bought cash from the POS operators who were exploiting people that period.

Thank God for the Church for coming through for it's members that period.

Fineman2:
I'm not oo

Sorry . It wasn't you I wanted to ask. I was asking TenQ

Fineman2:
thanks

You're welcome.

Are you still bornagain? 👀

TenQ:
I got Born again after watching this movie: do you know if it is available for download?

Yey!! I found it.

Here!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa-GsrB9W9k

Will see it after service.

TenQ:
I got Born again after watching this movie: do you know if it is available for download?

O wow! Thank God for your life.

Yes now it should be on YouTube.
Let me help you check.

Hope you're still in the faith though.

TenQ:
Was this movie " the Burning Hell"?

Yeah.. I think. It's a long time now but I think it is.

I watched it but in the comfort of our home.

The only movies we saw lol Ike this was one other christian rapture movie where two guys were riding on a bike, had an accident and went to hell.

Another film show we watched in this form was Charley Chaplain and we sat on benches, not on bare floor

yemmit90:
@EriMma1, if you work and earn a decent 6 figure, and you still dragging pocket money with your husband, then you must be a wicked useless wife. What on earth will you be doing with your monthly salary? I guess you will be spending it on yourself, family and personal developments, while the innocent son of another woman keep labouring to take care of you till he develop terminal stress or HBP and die before his time?

See, you are not doing him any favour by marrying him or give him sex, because he can always get the same favour without getting married to anyone. He only marries you as a partner, team player and assistant to run a family. Besides, he did not benefits more in this arrangement than you or has advantage over you in future, so why expecting him to carry all the loads alone while you earn decent income and not an handicap?

@op, if you spend all your youth days to satisfy ungrateful woman and fail to plan for your future, she will eventually spend her money on your children later in future when you must have gone broke or unable to make better money again and turn them against you at old age. She will made them believe you were useless ever since she married you. They will believes her because she is the one currently spending on them. By that time, her major focus would be to make you suffer and die alone.

A woman who earn in 6 figures but still expecting a mere pocket money from you does not love you, she is capable of doing something unimaginable to you in future.

Lies!

Why can't you men be open minded for once? Why can't you see things from other peoples point of view but always want to stereotype things?
Who told you it's every woman that wreck their man and abandon them in old age or turn their children against them?

It is normal for a man to give the wife that extra to compliment what she's earning. It doesn't mean she's not going to help out when the need arises.

Ok, now the op said he gives her 40k and expects her to augment it because he knows the 40k is not enough. In this case, is she not using her money to support the husband at the end of the day? Is it not from her purse the money is coming out? Why didn't she complain? She now turns and asks that her loving husband supports her, he grabbed calculator.
See... you men like dishing out what you can't take. That's what I've come to discover.

Marriage is give and take. Take it or leave it

This is why I'll never marry an average income earner because they can complain and press calculator? See all of them here. Calculator pressers.
That is why i advise men not to get married until they have a high income job, to avoid all this kind of headache but no, that small thing dangling under can't wait to start eating what the big boys are eating. They just jump enter marriage with 120k salary and start punching calculator here and there.

So when it comes to giving your wife money, mathematics go enter am?. You can't give her money to maintain that same body you mount every now and then? Na him you turn financial expert seeker/adviser.? SMH. This generation of men have lost it.

Na this kind things make marriage no dey hungry me again because if all a man can offer is to panel-beat my body and not care whether knots and bolts don dey loose or find it difficult to give me when I request, then ill rather live singularly, work and take care of myself without stress or any body knacking me up and down with no benefits or care. abi you wan dey chop me make i no chop you back? Damn! Na wa o.

Oga, give her pocket money. Na that one she go take know say she marry. Men are supposed to spend on their wife's, working class or not. That is why igbos name their wifes Oriakum, "eater of my wealth". It is your obligation to spend on her. I'm guessing you're Yoruba otherwise mouth no go gree you come talk this kind thing outside. I'm sure all your supporters here na Yoruba men. Kobojunkie number one.

Is killing the only way to resolve a conflict between you and your spouse? I don't get it.
Men should learn to be more tolerant and absorbing in any situation to avoid acting rash or violently.

If you can't settle your issues through simple dialogue, then walk away from the tensed scene and go cool off somewhere. You have no right to hit or kill her, no matter what.

Men should seek for wisdom to be able to handle and manage their marriage well instead of chickening out. The bible says in all thy getting, get wisdom. Only the lily-livered opt for divorce.

Lies. Photoshopped

Adexgentle005:
Which area be that?

We are talking about the places Ikeja electric covers na.