₦airaland Forum

Why would you allow your wife to disrespect your mother? That's where your problem started from. You are still a boy at 42, you don't deserve being called a man. Ball-less, spineless sack of meat.

clinician2x:
Islam and Christianity are polar opposites. Since Islam has destroyed him, Christianity will fix him up. I don't know why I have to spell out these things for you laidis

My question is obviously lost on you, or you are just trying to win an argument by further giving ridiculous responses with half wit. Go and read your first comment to the guy and reflect on your responses since then. There is no correlation. Everybody is trying to sound smart on the internet.
Anyways, do whatever rocks your boat. Shalom.

clinician2x:
But I'm not interested in winning any soul. What I am telling him.is what he can do and get better. What happens to anybody soul is not my fucklng business

So why ask him to denounce islam amd accept Christ? What is he supposed to do with that since you were not trying to win souls? Look for bible believing church to do what? Fry akara?

clinician2x:
You cannot study medicine and surgery. It is not for people like you.

Secondly, denounce that usless Islam religion, they have already ruined your life. Denounce the useless Allah and Muhammed all those stupid things they made u recite

Then accept Jesus Christ into your life, find a Bible believing church and join and u will have a breathe of fresh air. It will take some time but you will be happy you did.

At this stage, you are defeated but not destroyed. Accept this light and it shall be well with you.

You cannot win any souls for Christ with this approach. This is not Christ-like. Christianity is more like a verb, a doing or action "word". And it is about love and compassion. You dont win souls by barking out orders. Christ won souls by compassion not by ordering people around. Please revise your approach and you will experience better results. Shalom!

Find a way to leave your parents' house, by all means necessary. Your path in life will become clearer to you with time as long as you are willing to put in effort.
You are suffering from series of poor decisions your parents made for you ostensibly with good intentions. You are 26years with little sense of self worth and that is why you try every poor suggestion they give to you. As long as you remain in that environment your problem will only get worse. Such issues need to be tackled from the roots, in this case, your parents.

If you have any friend you can squat with for a while, please leave home. The farther away from home you go, the better. Out of town is much better. May the lord be with you on this journey of self discovery.
Try to stay positive. You will be fine. Shalom!

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

All the folks telling you here to let her go are not married and would not understand.
To start with, 50k is pittance for a family of five. Any woman with triplets and presently out of work will not be happy wirh 50k monthly let alone 25k. Are you kidding me? I understand that you are angry and all, but you have no right whatsoever to push tge blame on her, none whatsoever.
Your focus now ahould be finding ways to improve your finances. Thats all.
If you didnt marry her and she was living with her parents, you would probably not give her that much and still complain. The problem is not your wife, its your finances. Unless your mother is sick or old and can no longer work, reduce her allowance to 5k. You, on your own part need to make serious adjustments to squeeze out more for the children. Trek when you can, starve when possible but make sure the children and thier mom eat especially if she is still breastfeeding.

Part of the problem I am sensing from your post is that you feel like you are giving your wife money for herself not for the children. That is very wrong. Those telling you to let her go spend more than 25k on themselves alone monthly and they expect your wife to turn to professor peller abi ChrisAngel. Do not listen to them.

Welcome to fatherhood. Now some of you may begin to appreciate your fathers more and understand the hidden sacrifices they made without ever complaining. Appreciating only mothers is partly why some men act the way they act, afterall they wont be appreciated so why bother.

Where was Grandson when Oba Elegushi married a non yoruba northerner? Or is his obsession only with Igbos?

The igbo girl that did this thing to Grandson must be strong. He hasnt been able to move on with life ever since. If earthquake happens in yorubaland today, its Igbos that caused it. The guy and his followers are actually pathetic .

Rossikk:
You are a grossly misguided fool.

'American blacks' are descendants of West African slaves, of mostly southern Nigerian and Ghanaian origin - OUR COUSINS - who have had to fight and die for every right black people enjoy in the USA today.

EVERY RIGHT.

Including the right to sit down in a bar and order a coffee or a beer.

The right to walk the streets unmolested.

The right to go to school.

The right to use public toilets.

The right to eat in a restaurant.

The right to enter the restaurants from the FRONT door rather than the back entrance.

The right to sit elsewhere in the bus apart from the back.

The right to jobs and business ownership, and business loans.

The right to vote.

The right to not be publicly lynched by white gangs for no reason except their skin colour.

These and other rights were denied blacks as recently as the 1960s, and were fought for through blood.

Through blacks calling out racism, and challenging it everywhere it reared its ugly head.

Nigerians migrate to America today, and enjoy good jobs, freedom to do what they like and go where they like, and they praise the whites for creating such a free society where everyone's given a reasonable shot in life.

But it wasn't the whites that created it. It was the blacks. The African-Americans. The civil rights movement.

And they will keep on fighting for racial equality, despite the protestations of slave-minded, sellout buffoons, and diners with the devil, such as yourself.

Oh, and people like you are the MAIN reason why many African-Americans can't stand Africans. They see you how I see you: as mentally colonised sellouts and coons who will betray the race for a mess of pottage, and believe they're inherently inferior to white people, which you do, disgustingly.

Asides insults and throwing tantrums, read again slowly and comprehend. My comment does not deny the existence of racism. Yes there is racism in the US and elsewhere. Yes there are prejudices that abound everywhere you turn to.
Does that make every prejudice exhibited by someone of a different skin color racially motivated? Some of you mistake the depth of your emotions for the strength of your argument. Your logic is flawed.

The freedom was long fought and hard, we all know that and acknowledge it. Does it make them infallible? Does it mean they cannot be called out on their BS when there's any?
This mentality that some of you have is dangerous. So because they struggled and fought as has been done in previous civilizations and dispensations, we should walk around with a burden of indebtedness and swallow every form of absurdity because its coming from our brothers?
When a white person acts out some prejudice against a person of color does it automatically make it racially motivated? What about when a person of color does it to a white person or another person of color does it still make it racial?
But that is exactly what happens today. Once an act of prejudice is done, the first thing that will determine if it will get news coverage is the skin tones, and it is because of folks like you who sympathise with BS not minding the fact that prejudices will always abound and not all are about race.

When a black girl stood up in a university lounge and announced that they (blacks) wanted the space there and that all other races leave the cafeteria, did it make headlines? Of course not, because blacks are seemingly incapable of racial biases. Go to youtube and search for the video if you doubt it. Imagine that a white person did that in 2020!
Racism as it stands today is a two way street, every race exhibits it. I have seen whites, blacks, asians, latinos that are racists. Anyone is capable of racism.
Calling out racism is a duty we all owe, but is every act of prejudice against a person of color tantamount to racism? That is the question I need you to answer first before we proceed.

BRATISLAVA:
. The irony. Never once does it cross their minds that people just don't like people and it isn't always about their color.




What really do angry blacks want from whites? Heal, so that you don't filter everything through your wounds.
.

Finally, someone that gets the point. Nigerians like bandwagon effect. Everybody wants to appear woke especially those twitter olodos forming woke. They neglect the fact that prejudices will always abound in human nature and its not always about color. Once a person from a different race exhibits any prejudice, racial undertones are fed to it. So disgusting.
I literally have to school folks everyday about this. American blacks are the most racist beings on earth right now and they turn aroumd playing victim because that is the new woke trend.
They are racist toward asians, africans, and whites. Thiers isnt just normal human prejudices, its pure hatred and its sickening.

Just listen to one of your governors, Gov. Bala.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_frCTx5-U_w

This guy is the biggest comedian of the century. He missed his calling

It's only a matter of time before it gets to Aso Rock. Buhari and family will reap the seeds of discord they have sown. If any Nigerian politician decides to travel abroad, our folks abroad shall meet them there. It's a promise. The ears that they have refused to listen with will be cut off by anger of the masses.

myBraine:
He's only following the bandwagon and nothing more. Jack is a smart businessman that's playing a dicey game with the collective sanity of lazy protesters.

The more the hashTag trends on Twitter, the more relevant the platform becomes in Nigeria and the more valuable it becomes in the global market. Let's keep making a fool out of ourselves while thinking that in this challenging and competitive world where trade and tech war has become the order of the day, a foreign nation will want an Africa country to outdo them in Democracy and good governance. Don't you know that once we have good and stable governance, we'll start thinking of advancing our technological feat and reach. No foreign nation currently conceives the idea or possibility of an African empire. Imagine a country like Nigeria now building hypersonic missiles, DEW, nuclear propeller and warheads? That's a bigger threat to world peace and I'm in no way in support of that.

The truth is that Nigerian youths are growing wings and they have to be cautioned on time, unless we'll have to bear the burden of living with limited access to the internet and little or no access to other internet services like the world wide web and Co.

We'll only ended up pioneering a new generation where smartphones and computers will become irrelevants. In a tech world that's currently moving towards IoT where all our electronics will become an integral part of a smart environment, which will later give rise into a smart economy. A computer OR a smartphone without the internet is nothing but an electronic idiot. We should stop the protest now so that our kids will not live to become a victim of our weird and destructive invention.

The protest is gradually snowballing into an economic missiles and it needs to be stopped.

Why are your posts so painful to read and devoid of any sense whatsoever? I'm tempted to think that a maggot has a higher IQ than you. Just learn to shut up than litter the entire NL with asinine reasoning

They can't have Boko haram and have SARS at the same time.

You've been used. I understand how you feel. Been there, done that. If you learn to manage your expectations of people, you'll live longer. Learn the art of not really giving a fvck.

Many of us are acclaimed roman, greek, jewish and even British/US history buffs but when asked about our African heritage, crickets set in.

Let's learn to appreciate our heritage.

Who gave this woman palmwine again?

So this is now an achievement that you had to come online and create a thread? Chapels that businessmen in Anambra single handedly build for their communities is what a state governor did and it made headlines?

Sometimes we all don't have to join the stupidity if the govt decides to wallow in it.

DONFRANSKID:
Dey Don use toto damage this one brain he can't reason straight again

On the contrary, you are the damaged goods here. You inability to manage relationships with your fellow human being without being overtly insecure and paranoid is what is causing your damage. Everybody cannot see life through your miniscule prism.

The problem with your ilk is your inability to separate sex from human relations hence your comment above. Anyways, I also understand that most of the guys on here cheering folks like you are broke and mostly unproductive, so these are filler-ups for them.

You guys are no different from the "men are scum" women out there. You deserve each other.

My dear, don't take posts like that seriously. Most of those guys are just kids who know nothing about life forming redpill blue pill bollocks.
I actually see it as a cry for help. Most of these guys are lonely and feel unwanted hence the vituperations on women. At some point they'll realize that it's not all about sex.

They need help, above all they need love. Unfortunately the young aspiring player wannabes are digesting all the BS and applying it to their lives. Eventually, they'll be fine. Eventually.

anonymous1759:
Check out the IGR of Ogun with the whole of south and compare

Huge IGR doesn't translate automatically to development, that's a leadership vacuum.

I think that conceding this defeat was too easy and seems scripted. Something isn't quite right here. I guess Obaseki will return to APC. I think he was used to show Oshiomole that his influence is very overrated.
That Tinubu video wasn't convincing, if anything I think it was designed to cause the exact opposite effect...outrage.

In all, APC may have pulled a wool over the eyes of PDP but I guess PDP would have also anticipated an outcome like this and planned for it when they onboarded Obaseki.
Just my random thoughts.

Really sad that this is happening and I'm even more saddened that folks are having a feast off off it, taking sides and trading blames over their perceptions of a couple's marriage they know nothing about.
If and when you guys marry, you'd know better than to do what you are doing now.

This was one couple I was really rooting for. I pray they get on with life peacefully.

FFK is one yoruba man this generation, that has shown ndigbo love despite his shortcomings as a human being and despite inconsiderate comments and stances from IPOB's MNK.

Deji should know better than to interfere in people's marriage. So so so childish. Dem no dey take sides for people marriage, na you dem go still take settle if it happens.

I feel for the kids more. Poor kids didn't ask for any part of this.

Na from clap dem dey enter dance. Very soon, a Nigerian ambassador will be manhandled and his royal dullard will still be saving Nigeria from being a failed state.

Brushstrokes20:
You've made a lot of valid points...
Mistakes are the reasons we are humans
Forging ahead is what keeps us going
I also campaigned /voted buhari in 2015, but by the end of 2016, I realised dude is a MONUMENTAL BLUNDER , hence I've ever since been anti buhari
Kudos to the indefatigable pastor oyedepo and few others...im very disappointed in mbaka and co
I'm more than convinced that a well respected pastor like baba adeboye can single handedly call buhari to order...
In essence, we can't afford to keep quiet now
Else we'll become doomed slaves in our fatherland
Nig must be rescued from the diabolic claws of self serving, sadistic rulers and insatiable thieves...
Thanks and God bless.

Unfortunately, they will still vote him again if he runs against a southern christian especially Igbo. So they never learn from their mistakes. They let the same parochial sentiments guide them each time. If these killings were in the south alone, be rest assured that they will say that it's southern politicians that are sponsoring it. They wouldn't care about us the way we have been protesting these killings since 2012. After all they said the same of GEJ's era. They said it was southern christians sponsoring BH.

Most of those complaining are doing so because they have experienced personal hurt from these things going on, not because it's affecting "infidels".

Las las we go all get sense, but e still remain.

Brushstrokes20:
Another sane and vocal cleric from the North?.. I'm flabbergasted but thumbs up sir for asserting the bitter truth, irrespective of religious and tribal inclinations...
But why are pastorpreneurs silent?..
The self serving, redundant coupist is Nigeria's worst blunder!
.... And damn your dumb father if you quote me to spit trash!

Watch the video again. He is still placing blame on those around Buhari eg governors.

When the pastors spoke up were they not branded different names? Pastor Paul Enenche, Bishop Oyedepo, Apostle Suleiman, etc. They have been speaking for years but these same folks ranting now decided to bring back someone who they should have retired in 2019 after making the mistake the first time.

TheChameleon:


The 2nd Islamic Cleric saying thunder fire Buhari.

If only the Pastors too can speak up.

Cowards!

This would start a wave. Plenty fearless Alfas.

When pastors were speaking up were they not branded all sorts of names by these same people? Don't take the cleric's rant seriously, he will still apologize after he may have been arrested or threatened. Just give it a few days.

extol1:
in as much I don't like government policies, I think it is totally wrong for a spiritual leader who has a lot of followers to come out and make destructive criticism about a president

But they can make it if OBJ or GEJ is concerned abi?

Mentcee:
Buhari should just kaput for Nigerians to breathe!

If you agree please press like.

He will be alive to finish the work God sent him to do. He has only scratched the surface. Nigerians must have sense by force.

deepwater:
Spill the word raw!

Stop beating up religious sentiment

Sheik Murtala Bello said bla bla bla....

Remove the Islamic cleric from the story

Oga Sheik Murtala Bello is just a concerned Nigerian

Not necessarily a concerned Nigerian because in all his so called complaints he still found ways to assuage his tormentor's ego.
Maybe somehow this sh1t hitting the fan has touched him directly. Nigerians only acknowledge pain when it affects them directly. That's not concern, it's wickedness. In all the cleric still found a way to blame it on those surrounding Buhari, Governors.

It will go round. You see what Benue, Taraba, Middle belt and South East have been experiencing and complaining about the killings? Some folks thought it would not get to them.
They voted failure for a second time. They will do it again because of ethnicity and religion. They'd rather have an incompetent dolt from their clan than a productive leader from another clan.

They are still praying for him to change and for Allah to guide him. Well, Allah is guiding him very well to punish them since they have refused to grow sense. If you refuse food served in a porcelain dish, you will be served the food on the bare floor.

The cleric was just ranting maybe because of his personal experience, not out of genuine concern for all Nigerians.

Life is actually very simple. It is our actions and thoughts that complicate things. What you sow is actually what you reap but bountifully for it to be called a harvest.
You can't expect to sow rice and reap cassava. When you incite hate, it will eventually locate you. When you incite violence it will also locate you.
It's a no-brainer. The rulership was founded on hate and violence...and then envy.
Somebody threatened mayhem if he lost elections and it's the same person the people decided to entrust their lives to.
They thought the mayhem was meant for certain other sections of the country. As if the first time wasn't enough, they allowed him a second time.
People never learn from their mistakes. They will still allow him a third time if it were possible.

Unfortunately some people have foolishness and hate embedded in their DNA and those are the people still encouraging this misrule.

IneedSugarMumy1:
She don tell the guy say she no want again

Go ahead and marry her bro

Even if you drop her today next lady you're going to meet might be worst than her
They're no perfect person

Beside she didn't sleep with him she only accepted to marry him it might just be a normal chat

For allowing you to see the chat self maybe she just want to let you know say she's hot cake other people are seriously in need of her so that you will fasten up
Me no see it as big deal sha

Bro this kind lady go deh loyal to you las las I mean it

@op, do not pay any heed to this advice from this poster. It's mere fallacy. I doubt if he is married.

You are seeing signs of a lady who is unstable. Advice yourself.
1. You've dated for three years.
2. You've done introduction.
3. You are preparing for traditional wedding and church wedding
4. You gave her 1.5m for preparations.
5. You still sent her 100k for other logistics
Etc.
Despite all the above she has been seeing someone else ALL THE WHILE and even ACCEPTED his marriage proposal just last week.
She just wants to get married and doesn't care about both of you guys.

Take steps to avoid coming back here later to post a thread about a misbehaving wife.
A lot of the problems men face in marriage is caused by them. They trivialize things that matter and exaggerate things that don't matter.
The devil is in the details. Be guided.