₦airaland Forum

kunleweb:
Takes time to grow mentally, it'll take years. I'll check u on you not to worry. Cheers

Ill rather be comfortable and happy with my choices at the risk of being stupid than to feel sad and inconvenient myself cuz i want to appear mature.

MariaLavina:
"Anything beyond that is pure garbage".

Like seriously?

Yes seriously

kunleweb:
Smh oya you've been called out


Missjoy29

Sexybaby22

ImaIma


As for me, I give up , may I not have a son with such mindset, I rest my case by saying povertly can be addictive

Bring it on. Their opinions are invalid to me

From my last thread about how i took a girl out on a date with just 2k.
Let me background this with some facts in view.

When i said i dont spend money on mundane things, it means that...sometimes i dont get pple with the way they spend money on frivolities.
1. For instance birthday celebration is a complete garbage to me, i mean if u re beyond 18, and thats cus you can excuse kids for being stupid. Life is tough and we have to acknowlegde that fact.
2. Having more than 2 kids is bullshìt cuz i feel with 2kids u can give them the best life they should exp with d limited resources "you" have. Imagine if this country had like 30m instead 200m population.
3. Expensive Wedding.. Oh my gosh, complete arrant nonsense, why not divert it to biz or sth.

Those things i highlighted up there to me are complete mundane things i do not or wish to spend money on. But then if you have extra large cash then no biggie but they re still bullshìt.
Then what re things i spend money on... i love to spend money on things that will gives me a new level of experience, for instance, one time i wanted to travel, i could have boarded a bus but then i decided that i would take a flight instead. So that means i would have to cut back on some mundane things i spend money on. Like clothes, foods, alms giving and all that so save twice or thrice the intended amount.
Ok right now i need a new laptop, i could have gotten a good HP with nice RAM and processor speed but i want to get a Macbook instead almost 2x the price so that means i have to be more sagacious with my spendings...Grab?

Now on the issue of that date, seriously its not really about saving money or sth, but its about common sense, its a date for crying out loud. Its to share moments, talk about unserious things, after having a very busy week. Its not a job/business interview where you proof a point and get a mark or a nod of approval, its to unwind and being in the moment. Two adults who understand this would make things simple for eachother.
But then if u re on a date to proof a point, or seeking for something which your future/life depends on, then maybe you can go all serious trying to catch all the fallen cups just to appear like a perfect guy.

So with this few reasons of mine, I still maintain my stand, 2k date is the cool date. Anything beyond that is pure garbage. Either you have the money or not.
I am not averse to the fact that you can treat yourself to some nice and expensive things onces in a while, but then i understand the greedy nature of humans, someone asks you out on a date and you want to use that opportunity to the fullest. But i feel if u can afford those things, then you wouldnt feel the need to want to use the opportunity to fill up your glut stomach or whatever it is. Thank you.

@Jayneek i made this thread in response to your thread trying to school me on how to go on a date. I dont need your noob dating skills. Been going on a date since 2011, so i am well experienced in that field and ive got it covered.

afribabe:
please tell us what happened at work the next day. Please

I will get it all out but i ve been inundated with lots of bashes, advices, both on NL and off NL my brain needs reset, or maybe to shrug it off, but either way i need time. But bae didnt take it easy on me.

ImaIma1:
The op gaspardd is conveniently responding to only people who cheer him on and support his actions. He cannot handle the truth and criticism.

And i don't know if evercurious is actually serious with her comment or just trying to get likes from the guys.

Would you go on a date with me if i asked?...I am gonna come along with only 2k

vingeophysicist:
Okay do you remember me ?

Lol ofcourse bro. U were always d controversial guy back then.

vingeophysicist:
Which local government ? Ohoazara or onicha lga .I know you .Gaspard so this is you .one of the shy guys in camp .Hope you still hear from maria

I wasnt shy in camp. Camp was a very horrible exp for me. I queued for all the nonsense one spoon ration. I had to conserve my energy.
Derby and I served in ohaozara but its been long i heard from maria

LeoFish92:
Lol, we were all part of one whatsapp group that year, which I think was formed from here on Nairaland.

Yea i remember the Leo. How ve u been bro?

LeoFish92:
'Gaspard' a familiar moniker.

Did you serve in 2016? Batch A?

Yea bro. Ebonyi corper

nkwuocha:
There is so many thing wrong with this guy and truth be told, the lady is way above this guy in ALL facets of life, both in intelligence and otherwise.It would be unwise to date this guy if i were to be the lady.There are so many flaws i noticed already and trust me, an independent intelligent woman wont be happy with such a man no matter how she loves him.She'd snap some day.My observations

*The guy is dirty.A working class guy should always have his shirts clean and ready.Infact, those with fewer shirts but have clean mindsets always look smart.Back in the University, with 50 starch and well ironed shirts, my friends and 1 were always looking like 1 billion pn a 200 naira shirt.
*He is" poor" both in cash and mentality.
*He is weak in taking decision.Lacks composure.I dont have a problem with his 2k but the manner he exposed his poverty stricken mindset.Mehn!the shame is brutal.
*Very pessimistic to life. He said he lives cheap and he is cheap!Is he Ok?!Who thinks like that?
*How on earth will you borrow a shirt to go on date when you have your own?How much does it cost to buy local starch and Key soap?100 naira local atarch can take 20 shirts!!!
*He is not organised.
*I doubt if he changes his boxers regularly and use good deodorant,even if it is cheap.
*I bet he is the type that wears dirrty socks on smelly office shoes.There are dozen of socks for 1000-1200 and that can take you a year!

The guy na dirrty, stingy and very local minded schmuck.

A girl once said to me that i am the neatest guy she has ever met. That doesnt proof anything but do you think you re 100% right with your analysis?

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Act like the boss and na only 2k u see chook for pocket? Pls let's do away with poverty mentality... Anyways different class, different line of reasoning.

This is Nigeria with 18k as minimum wage. So whats wrong with budgeting 2k for a single date? Maybe u re rich and stuff, good for you but this is Nigeria, being brokeass is a normal thing.

kunleweb:
Change your orientation. See as you wicked reach. You used to be one of my most respected dude for years, look how you mess up, walking in your social Co ditioning life as misled you to believe, women are after your wallet. Smh, this is low. You rationed a date to, I should slap you now. Seriously, if you aren't overly negative you won't be leaning on the mindset that she was after your wallet. See why they say when ladies love, they can give their heart and all, you were in the reverse from the onset, while she was much more open to possibilities, psychological cancer, you need to be whole to date, cause it requires taking responsibilities for more than one individual should things work right. While you're fixated on your rep, I bother about your awareness to your condition. Fix yourself, work on your psyche, I suggest changing your friends and everything you feed your mind with. I can't allow my enemy date a guy like you in your present form. Next time, whenever you plan I volving a third party, always know that things can go sideways real quick and have a back up plan. The 3k you wanted to save due to your assumed gluttony you already Conclouded her to be was the price of your reputation. I feel like flogging you. Make sure you ask for another date immediately and make corrections. Do it while it's fresh before it cast a permanent memory if she declines move on

It wasnt about the mentality that women are after my pocket, its d fact that i have a spending cap and i do not exceed it. And like i said in the OP i am a cheap guy, i live well below my means hence d reason for the 2k.
And again it was supposed to be a date, meetup to share moments together and not a food party.

Megfrivolous:
Please do this feminists have a kind of online dating app where i can see them... Biko.

Lol

CaZmir:
Gaspardd howfa that your hot, sexy ,fine colleague wey drink your Pepsi sometime ago inside bus? that one u no de show face for work.
Una later parole.

She is a flirt. Everybody says she likes them, even one said she was flirtin with him on fb. Maybe she went beyond boundry with me but then i realised it wasnt sth special.

AntiBrutus:
If you were the one with all the money, will you carry her along?

Maybe ask her, "babe, I want to buy meat, do you have money to add?"

I am VERY SURE you won't. You will just order the thing like a boss and pay the bills.

Tell me the truth, if say you get money and she pay, shey you for the plan return match to equalize? Oga, you are fighting with your ego.

It is very hard dating guys without much money and I am not being condescending here. Call a rich guy "ewu" and he will laugh, because im know say the money dey pon the beat. Call a humble guy "ewu" and he will rush to create thread. I graduated since 2016, I have one small job I am managing, but I don't hesitate to take care of my babe. Yesterday she called me ewu, should I breakup with her?

Walahi, you guys are paranoid. Una dey synonymous with not-goodlooking girls.

We all have our roles to play, i am the man and shld act like the boss. This is not me being paranoid its about she being full of herself

SaucyBenks:
you knew you're colleagues at work, you should know better what to do... First impressions bro

I should have gone with 10k or my ATM?

AntiBrutus:
Men; We want independent women. Nigerian ladies are olosho, they don't pay on dates.

Man goes on a date with lady. Lady pays the bills and even tops the menu

Man comes on NL next day to create a thread like this.

She could have done it in a cool way, y'kno.. carry me along and shìt

SaucyBenks:
seriously bro, you mumu true true... Stingy grasshopper!!!

Mtseeeeewww!

No wonder you no get shirt...

I just dont spend money on mundane things. And i am not stingy

SageMK:
I wish guys can take a page from your book and stay within their stipulated budget when they take a woman out for a date but nah, most spend uselessly to impress.

Guy, you should walk into your workplace tomorrow with your head held high. You have nothing to worry about & your reputation is in check... Now she knows what you are all about. It's left to her to stick around or bounce.

Logically i feel i did the right thing but then it was a very awkward moment for me

Jayslicky:
Move on and forget about all these, if you over spent your income because of a date will she be there when you will be going 101 for the rest of the month?

Naso bro, that wud have really bleeped up my monthly budget and mth still far

Lagbaja01:
You had a date with "miss independent"

Ooh there's something about
Kinda woman that can do for herself
I look at her and it makes me proud

Miss independent
That's why I love her

I am certainly not proud of all this

There is this lady at work, she works for the client and i work for the contractor. She has a nigga friend who is my padi and he has been talking to me about her, after so much persuasion, i said fùck it and gave it a shot.

Really she was so receptive than i envisaged and since then we've been casually saying hi and stuff.
On saturday i called her and asked about her weekend, she told me she wasnt doing anything, i suggested we meet on sunday(ytd). She said she wud call me wenever she's back from church.
She called around 5pm, i dressed up, all my clothes were creased so bad so i had to borrow a niggas Tshirt, pocketed 2k cus i am cheap and i live cheap, so i cant spend more than 2k on a date.

I got to d venue, she was waiting already, she was putting on a gown revealing some cleavage which was a very nice sight but really unlike her as she always dress modest to work.
Long story short, i ordered for drinks, all was 1400 naira, which was within budget, d 100 naira change will be for my TP and i will give d maruwa guy 500 for her own TP to give her d remaining change. Everything was going according to plan, things were going fine , what a good time to be alive. Suddenly she said she feels like chewing sth.
I initially made as if i didnt hear what she said, she said it again and i interjected with "NOPE, CHEWING IS BAD FOR TEETH" She laffed and beckoned on the waiter to come over. In shock i yelled wait wait, i brought out the whole of 1500, dropped it on the table and told her this all i have with me, already she knows there is 1400 payment to be made.

She didnt give a shìt, she called the guy, brought 2 plates of meat, i was just feeling awkward watching how the whole shìt wud play out. At last she brought out her purse, gave d guy some money, i picked the 1500, gave it to the waiter but he returned the money, said the money she gave him is complete.
Seriously i was ashamed of myself, i wanted to talk about it but i decided to let it slide so as not to overflogg the issue.
Later we were done and i saw her off, i gave d driver 500 for her TP. Some hrs later i saw 3missed calls from her, i texted her back and she responded with... see you tmao. While i dont know wht that means but i know she is gonna tell everybody at work about what happened, about how i am a stingy pig. But i aint stingy, i just priotize things i spend money on.
Today i told my niggas what happened, i have only two niggas, but neither i nor any of them has heard about the parol from another source. But then i am sure that if words get around, my reputation = Ruined

I remember when i was younger, full of dreams and shìt. The energy was there and i wanted to become lot of things. But now that i am almost 30, i feel like an old man. I met a beautiful young girl the other day, she is from my place, i remember i used to coordinate them in childrens class at the church teaching them 10 commandments. Now she is all grown up, big and even dating a "senior man" that i know. All this reinforces the fact that i am already getting old and the feeling is getting deeper everyday.

Right now i am sitting at the balcony wondering "what do i want out if life?", and the answer is diff from the way it used to be wayback. When i was in my teen yrs, i wanted to become a president someday, i wanted to change the world, i wanted to impact my generation.
And i used to look down on the old folks esp my dad for not feeling the drive i used to feel, why would sn decide not to push forward and just choose to go to bars, drink and laugh with friends all the time? So i used to think. But after being kicked multiple times in the face into the mud by the boots of life, all i want now is to get a self con, get a TV, buy bitcoin, get a steady girl friend and be happy ever after. I guess all i want now is just to be happy, i dont care about any other shìt anymore, i am not interested in changing the world or some bullshit. But all those things seems to be a lofty dream this days considerin Nigerian daily daily problems.

For instance, you want to get a gf, Big problem as our girls are not helping matters. 2. I starved myself for 3yrs, saved money to start a biz and it crashed on me like fallen sharp knives due to our govt bad policies that doesnt help the poor.
At this stage i dont even know what i want anymore. I guess my dad was right, i might just resign to fate and start winging it, you know..going to bars, laughing with friends and stuff.
Now to put it straight, What do you want out of life?

Guest007:
Taught

Dasalll

Noted thank u. Damn my brain don fry

lilwetdick:
cough cough, what have you written and what valuable lesson was learnt..

If u do not get d point, then you still have a very long journey ahead of you in life.

UyaiIncomparabl:
You and Victorian are no different. Ceaselessly yapping about unimportant, vapid and unreal stories. Now tell me, what should we do with this information?

Hey fat face, how re u?

I am usually not around cuz of hustle and odd jobs. She was given birth to when i was in nysc. I wasnt aware my mum had a baby coming cuz she and the whole family decided not to tell me(as a surprise). I came home after 3yrs(nysc + odd jobs) to meet a toddler, the thought of having a baby sister gave me little shocks for some days.
Now she is 6yrs old, very cute, energetic and stuff. The energetic part is prolly very worrisome cus whenever we all re at home, she plays, jumps, runs up and down from morning till night without getting tired and heck, all i'll have to do is walk from kitchen to sitting rm and i am soo tired i will need to crash.

Now back to the topic
I came back home after like a yr of being away and she is still thesame energetic girl. She has a cousin that plays with her just to match up with her playfulness. But today she was just going full overboard like a mad man on methamphetamine.
After several warnings and no budge, i grabbed her, took her to an empty rm. Told her she would remain there for the next 6hrs. Alone. I looked arnd, saw the book open heavens, threw it at her and told her she would later explain to me what she read inside.

The door is not entirely locked, it had a chain attached to it(beyond her reach) to the main frame so it can still be opened by like 10cm wide.
At first she was crying, yelling and trying to find means to open the door but i never gave a shìt about that. Later little cousin came over bragging about how she would have found a means to open the door had it been it was her. After so much bragging, my lil sis started yelling "EHN COME AND OPEN THE DOOR NAH, STOP TALKING, COME AND DO IT".

Cousin was still bragging but lil sis was just yelling at her to stop talking and come to open d door instead. At some point, she said " SEE STOP TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT"...that was the part that got me cus ive had direct exp with sth like this and it cost me sth very dear to me. Same mistake i see pple making everytime... sometimes you hear some pple who have never been in a fight b4 giving their shìt opinions authoritatively about how Iran should have fought their wars.
Well back to my sis story, like i said that speech really got me, and i tot to myself..dude this girl has learnt a valuable lesson and i hope she takes to it for the rest of her live. So I walked over, smiled at her, opened the door for her and she sat down gently like a good girl afterwards.

That i got married to a very beautiful girl. She was very very beautiful and i was really so much in love with her. I can still remember how she smiles and how she leans on me whenever she does that.
In the dream her mum died immediately after she joined our hands together. The dream was kinda estactic but waking up in real life, shldnt i be really scared?

When was the last time u had sex?

vybzkartel:
I proposed a love relationship to this girl and she said no, and that she wants us to be just friends. But, she is always calling and texting me. She compares me to some celebrities.she sends me her pictures even when I have not requested. She discusses her very personal things with me. She confesses several times she misses me. I sext her and make my sexual intentions to her and she doesnt complain. At times I decide to cut her off by not contacting her, but she will always contact me. Am I friendzoned or there is some chance to get this girl?

Stop advancing sexual overtures towards her, its pathetic