₦airaland Forum

^^^ashawo.
Is this an open invitation,so she wud come ride with u?
Eka-aro,awon Iyawo ati omo nko?

No,i cant because . . . .
Refuse and give reasons.simple

@Akhenaten,o nwere onye gwara gi wepu aha onye dere edemede ahu,its still there 
@Topic,Why wud anyone wish himself/herself death?Is it not life first?It really beats me why anyone wud choose to remain in a place that is clearly highly dangerous for him.Having lived in Jos,I agree most of the Igbos up there have stayed so long there and can't think of anywhere else but J-town as their home but when push becomes shove . . .anaghi agwa ochi nti na agha esula.

Btwn,strong tower Mission give out free food items,clothing,accommodation and go as far as starting up small-scale biz for ppl,all for free . . .I have lost count of how many times we have had to beg,coerce some of these beggars to just say yes and atleast get a roof over their head,get the kids in school etc.Guess what,once that suggestion is made . . .they never come back again,even for the free food.

http://www.stmng.org/about.html

Folks suggesting taking them willingly from their parents or giving them jobs to do must be living in la la land or have NOT really encountered those fulani/chad beggars . . . .The love/ties btwn them and their parents is extremely strong.No amount of money can entice them to disobey or leave their parents to work or go to any home.
I think the solution is to deal with the root cause,the parents.
@Toyin,adoption is not as easy as we think.There are age limits . . . You cant just wake up and adopt an 8Yr old boy off the streets of lagos and bring into ur home unless u have a death wish for urself.We can however foster a child age,notwithstanding.
Btwn,those child beggars aint even going nowhere,begging is their only known source of livelihood,they sort of believe they are born to beg . . .even the pretty grown up ones don't enter pro.stitution,they marry a fellow beggar and the cycle goes on . . .

Akhenaten:
[flash=450,450]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpUhAGnutAA?fs=1&hl=en_US[/flash]

I don reach house . . .
Akhenaten don't stop pls.

Unfortunate.
Rich/Celebrities in Niaja really need to beef up security ard them . . .price they got to pay.
Haterz everywhere.

Funny ppl registering just to comment on this thread,obviously old soups in new pots . . .cowards.
Thread is abt someone getting married,see the level of bad-belle,cheei . . .

shes obviously preggie

wheres ur dad?

muhsin:
Muhsin dey busy undertaking training for INEC Voter Register.  Beside, I, sincerely and actually speaking, know little about that issue. I had a well written book concerning it and have read it sometimes ago, but it must have been either lost or misplaced. Can't locate it for now.

haha.
If dem  post u go my village u wud surely come back with your 4 wives complete . . .lolz.We are just too pretty and look take-away-ish.
May Allah(swt) be your companion,lighten your journey and grant u goodness and piety.Amin

I have stopped going on guilt trip whenever i jam those kid beggars.I remember seeing one of them braiding her mums hair,i offered to put her in salon where she can work and make money,she refused,Oya come and be braiding my hair at home once a week and get paid handsomely . . .she rejected it out rightly.she was abt 12 or so,must've been Fulani/chad
When im touched,i buy them snacks/cooked food,much to the chagrin of the nearby-parent who for obvious reasons wud prefer i give cash.

@OP,i hope by morrow u have gotten over ur anger . . .and disappointments.
She has made choices for herself already by getting herself preggie,NOW,all you need do as a friend is to be there for her and stand by her through other decisions shes going to make.
However,if u cant deal with her getting herself knocked-up,cant stand her anymore . . .Tell her and kill whats left of the relationship.

Nnam bu agbalusia Ngene . . .I dont know what it means
Titles don't mean much these days in some quarters . . .money talks.

You guys wud kill me oooooo
Biko can u guys get any song from "Afam Ogbotogbo" ?
My husband sings "enenebe eje olu' to calm me down me when he misbehaves.lol

Lagosboy:
Abortion according to scholars is only ever permitted if the health of the mother is at risk . This issue is non negotiable in islam, however there are differences in when abortion is deemed as "abortion". By that i mean if the pregnancy is just one week and the thing is still just blood and not formulated. Some scholars regard termination at that stage as not abortion. There are few technicalities regarding that, and i dont want to confuse us with this except you would like to probe further.

Secondly, birth control and family planning is largely allowed and permissible in islam. The reasons for this range from spacing of children to protect a womans health, enabling full suckling of a child for up to two years like the quran prescribes. Most  birth control method are permitted in islam except the permanent sterilization which is also overuled if is done for health reasons. Methods like condom and the withdrawal method should be done with mutual agreement between the two parties, as the satisfaction of the woman is very important in which case she has the right to turn down the use of condom/withdrawal by her husband if it affects her sexual pleasure negatively.

Having said all of the above, we should note that whatever will be will be and if Allah decrees a baby no matter the amont of contraception the baby shall be concieved. Such was the case when some men asked the prophet  PBUH about the withdrawal method and he did not condemn it, instead he said approved it but said the decree of Allah could not be prevented.

The quran in 17 v 31 said "dont kill your children for fear of poverty" , some scholars have prohibited use of contraceptive to prevent child birth for economic reasons based on this verse and some have said this verse actually refers to an already born child. By and large, the fear of poverty should not prevent us from having children as our sustainance is never in our hands but the hands of the almighty and every child comes with his or her own rizq. Nevertheless , we should also use our intellect and intelligence as regards birth control as economic factor is not the only issue with children but the psycological ability of the parents to rear them, the time and attention they require etc.

I hope i have briefly introduced this topic and the discusssion is open for all to contribute to please.

And God knows best

Thank you.
@Mushin . . . still waiting for ur inputs.

olanajim:
@
@Ify,

I miss you! Where have you been? Please email me at isqilnajim@yahoo.co.uk . I thought u have disappeared. You own me a lesson on Isoko delicacies,

Hey,Olanajim . . .u abandoned NLD.
Wud reach u as asap,expect ur hot banga(tinko,peri-winkles,snails inclusive) and starch.lolz

derexo:
This girl clearly needs help. Her name came up again in a recent newspaper article (http://odili.net/news/source/2011/jan/9/510.html) and she is now in Kirikiri maximum prison. She should be getting help in a mental institution. Nigeria we hail thee.

She wud finish her term in Kirikiri first . . .seems shes already mentally stable c/o ur link

Lacrissa:
I mean like not being a steady job, the income etc

Oh Finance . .
Does he have a degree,handiwork or sumtin,is he doing it full time or part time,are u working/have a steady income?
IMO,if the answers are Negative,I wont. . . It doesn't mean someone else cant.

Are they un-dateable?whats wrong with them

This is serious and scary.

Is this news?

@Nadia,which kain "hairstyle" be dat?
They are always together and united as a family considering its a polygamous home . . .

Lagosboy:
Good reply though, May Allah increase you in wisdom. I would insha Allah talk on the subject in a bit.

. . waiting.

muhsin:
Good. Glad to 'hear' that.

I see Lagosboy has attended to that. I may say more later, inshaAllah.

Not yet.You can set the ball rolling

[quote author=tpia* link=topic=582977.msg7501969#msg7501969 date=1294672965]any other info like groom's name, etc.[/quote]Yes oh.This might be a movie scene if its true,Congrats Shan and happy married life.

queensmith:
No we certainly cannot! What is unacceptable for a woman is quadriple HELL NO for a man! If he cant handle his bizniz now with barely any burdens he can never handle a family!

@ify they cant be that good for freinds they have only known for 6 months
no2 I dont think its sensible of plausible to be in love within 6months
Its definitely unplausible to be loving someone with your salary ESPECIALLY if youve only known him for 6 months!
What kind of happiness can you wish her with a sponging tramp for a boyfriend?

U wrote that
I did not raise any of those points ur post was addressing.

likeme:
Nobody says He is a leech. He is not the one demanding for the money. It's not everybody that is born with a silver spoon. There are down times in life.

if you read through her post, she said she had to scold d guy be4 the guy could accept the money from her. That shows a level of integrity in him. he might not be one of those guys. The guy would have sort himself out anyhow.

I am not making any excuse for the guy. I don't know him. I don't even have a girlfriend so the OP cannot be referring to me. All I said is if she truly did it with the heart of love, then there is no problem and Its not as if the guy is lazy or not putting enuff in the relationship. It is a situation where d lady is doing better than the guy for now.

If a girl need something she is trying to get means of having it and the BF offered to help to the extent that he insisted when she(gf) refused to take the offer from him. She can take it and it's not a matter of being taken for granted. common what are we together for if we cannot sincerely help each other out.

Love is not all about se.x its all about sincerely sharing life together and may be ladies should get to know that Guys hardly forget the girl that was there for him at his downtime. These are the acts that speaks volume for the girls when they mess up sometimes. Guys will look inward and see her kind heart rather than the ugly act.

My 1 cent now

Look,im not saying he might be anything or anyone.Its the OP's headache to decode who her man is or is not.
What i have been on abt since my first post is this:
If one person's job is to give while the other just sits and receive . . .its NOT healthy.sooner or later,there wud be complications.
btwn,i had to re-read the OP's write up and :
where did he get the bulk money to repay the babe?He has money somewhere or[i] another kind babe[/i] gave/lent him that

baroong:
Unless he/she grew up in an Orphanage.

I believe in standard and well functioning orphanages,once the kids are 18,they get assigned to foster parents/families who wud stand-in for them in such cases.
Im a foster sister to alot of great n wonderful girls . . .God bless "our big happy home"

Cosmass:
What are your thoughts on introducing your boyfriend/girlfriend or fiance/fiancee as an orphan to your family for introduction. we know introduction is where both families meet, what if your partner does not have parents or family? What are your thoughts? How would/do you feel?

What really happened?did she grow up in an orphanage home or [i]she told [/i]you she is an orphan?
If she grew up in a home,for state/govt run home i believe she wud get someone at social welfare or the home that shld stand-in as her family but If the latter is the case(she told u she is an orphan) . . .I hope u have done ur checks?no one becomes an untraceable orphan overnight.
Goodluck.

queensmith:
No we certainly cannot! What is unacceptable for a woman is quadriple HELL NO for a man! If he cant handle his bizniz now with barely any burdens he can never handle a family!

@ify they cant be that good for freinds they have only known for 6 months
no2 I dont think its sensible of plausible to be in love within 6months
Its definitely unplausible to be loving someone with your salary ESPECIALLY if youve only known him for 6 months!
What kind of happiness can you wish her with a sponging tramp for a boyfriend?Ive never agreed with you for one miniute on this site but I 100% agree with you on this!

@poster take it from someone younger who has been there a million years ago, if you love this man, watch how much MORE youll love a man who takes care of himself, handles his business and sets an example!

Me
Nothing concern me with the duration of the relationship.Mine is that in every relationship;dating,marriage,mother-child . . .its Unhealthy if one person is doing ALL the giving.

likeme:
If truly jennykadry is happily married the way she paint it here, I presume your husby in in for a a real trouble. The man is just coping with you as a wife. Why must you start calling people names because of their choice. I can as well call you OPONU for calling your husband when u saw a snake rather than running away. infact you are a not-so-smart person.

Read the 2nd post of the OP . The guy in question is not the one asking her to bring food, He did not ask her to borrow him the money to extend his visa. The BF is ready to go back to 9ija if worse comes to the worst. The lady saw the plight of the guy and chose to help. Helping others got no boundary. People have gone all the way to help others achieve their dreams.

@Chaircover, there are 3 essential things a fruitful relationship. Take a partner as a friend, 2. as a brother/sister, then as a lover. In this case she chose to be a friend or a sister.

If she has not lend him the money, the BF might have sought himself out. I can say categorically that be4 this girl, this guy has been surviving and he will with or without her.

A lot of the posters above do not really know what it's like to work with an agency in uk especially as a student. sometimes u dont get enuff hours, sometimes you get more than enuff, sometimes u don't even get at all. If love is not really based on money then it should not be a detterring factor. Let love flows.

My 1 quid.

Indeed!
Basically,all those who made it as students were leeches to their GF's or prolly had rich parents?
Wait a mo' . . are u trying to make excuses for the guy now?LOL
He wud survive without this girl . . .FACT.Please he shld do so already and NOT take advantage of the girls large heart.

Tunmi:
Nigeria has better actresses than Genevieve. Bimbo akintola for one is a better actress than she is. And when Genevieve plays a role, it's always the bad-backside person. I love her in those roles because Nigerians need to see women in non-submissive roles. However, she does not challenge herself. Ije is the closest she has come to challenging herself. Not because it involves foreigners but because she plays a person who is not in control and has to care for someone else. I like Genny but nigeria has other actresses that are often ignored.

@Bolded i agree wholeheartedly . . .but reality is that Gene is lucky.She gets it all,career-wise.
Bimbo is an exceptionally good actress.