₦airaland Forum

floridam: @ijebulogic, u re supposed to be writing scripts for acting oo.
I bet it's your calling

I doubt its my calling but your complement is received with thanks. What i shared is what (unfortunately) happens in public sector everyday. A stage of actors pretending to each other and ignoring the audience. Just spend a week interacting with our leaders in Abuja and you will know what i mean.

Mr President: Morning Team
Psychophants: Moring Sa!!, Long Live Nigeria Sir, Long Live Madam sir!!, Morin Sir.
Mr President: Okay, straight to business. Please give me highlights of the main issues we need to address this week.
Psychophants: Commander in Chief, we are facing the biggest national disaster of our time sir, the people are dying in floods sir, even my grandmother's house in some unknown village that contributes nothing to our GDP is flooded sir. The people are screaming for help, the Ministries are screaming for funds. we need funds sir - that is, cash, dollars, faroukas, Kudi, moneeee!!!
President: Oh that is terrible. So let me understand this, is this flooding a national or localised issue
Adviser: Localised sir, we have found that....
Psychophant: Please, please please, Mr adviser, you are not on top of the matter. Mr President this is a National disaster and the funding must reflect federal character. The desert areas of the north must get funds, also the people who already live on water in the creeks must be well funded. Areas like Lagos, run by that opposition party, Action Group or so dont need any funds, they have plenty money. But back to the issue of funds sir, we need money fast fast sir. fast!!!
Mr President: Okay, thank God we have the Ecological Fund and competent Ministers and Agencies to handle this issue
Adviser: You are right sir, the Ecological fund invested in Treasury Bills and Government Bonds and by my estimate should be worth about...
Psychophants: Haba Mr adviser, why do you mislead us?? Mr President, the Ecological fund has been wiped out by the global financial crisis and all the inaction of the CBN. In fact sir, i think we need to invite the Governor of the CBN to come and tell us what happened to the fund. I think we should use the money from Government savings sir!
Mr President: Okay and modalities to be managed my NEMA, Ministry of Environment, Ministry of Agric, Housing and Works?
Psychphants (shout in unison): No sir, this is politically sensitive and affects all arms of Government. We should run by an objective committee sir.
Mr President: Okay, makes sense. So i need the DG of that NEMA place, Perhaps an economist, and lets get in touch with the UN agencies that are experts in disaster management. What about that Mayor of New Orleans, he did an amazing job during their disaster - lets invite him to advise us on a special contract. Okay team?
Psychphants: No sir! absolutely not!!! we dont need foreign assistance or the people will say you are weak! Common New Orleans Mayor...who is he sir? Does he have money like our Adenuga and Aliko? we think we should promote our own people sir.
Mr President: well...okay. I dont agree but in the spirit of democracy, i will side with my advisory team. Set up the commitee immeditaly and write my speech, i want to address my people tomorrow morning by 7am. Any other issues?
Adviser: yes sir...last weekend, four students.
Psychophant: Oga adviser!!! Please go and write the grammar for the speech let me finish briefing Oga on the students.
Adviser: Okay, excuse me sir while i call the media etc.
Psychophant: Thank you and good bye. Ehen Mr President, some cult boys killed themselves last weekend. This country sha. In our days, shebi we just used to box each other and smoke gbana. Now the cultists are killing themselves. But dont worry sir, the Nigerian people are not even concerned about it.
Mr President: As a former lecturer, this thing pains me. I should spend at least 1 minute consoling the families?
Psychophant: HABA!! capital no sir! Next thing they will say its because the boys were in a cult you sponsored thats why you are talking. They will ask why you didnt talk since when others were killing themselves. Dont worry sir. Lets handle the floods, Nigerians are not worried about those boys.
Mr President: Well, okay, i guess you guys are doing your jobs and giving me the information that i need to act.
Psychophants: YES SIR! Long Live Nigeria sir... please sir, we need funds fast to mobilise the committee.

dino2006: I saw a red-blue-white flag hoisted behind Jona, during d telecast. Is dat our new flag , or is it my tele dat is color traumatized ?

Noticed as well. Na wa o!

Any Army General who goes to war without selecting the very best lieutanants will fail. GEJ must damn the consequences and fire all half-baked special advisers, speech writers, cabinet members etc and handpick only the best of the best (regardless of tribe, age etc and political god-fatherism) and get this country working. If any of my staff made such a blunder on a speech that I had to read to the world, the culprit and his entire team would be fired and never work in Government again. Its a disgrace that GEJ's research team dropped the ball so badly.

Just heard from MMIA that a Qatar Airways plane had to crashland a few hours ago due to a faulty tyre. Reports claim there were no lives lost or serious injuries.

The problem with companies like RIM is they are limited in their exposure and understanding of markets outside their comfort zone (i.e the USA). Previous posters say that Africa isnt a big enough market to sustain Blackberry? I completely disagree. RIM has simply not developed a good enough strategy for Nigeria (Yet)...So far they have (finally) announced the opening of a Lagos office, because only a blind man would deny the potential of Blackberry in Africa. Let me state my reasons.
1. Nigeria alone has 160million people with an impressive teledensity of almost 75%. If RIM acquires just 10% of that market, the impact on its sales will be phenomenal
2. The Blackberry appeal is "pinging", free real time comms, which creates a chain effect. i.e. I must have a BB to communicate with another BB (the alternative Apps have some limitations). So RIM have a power-product with a multiplier effect..the only need to dock it properly in Africa.
3. There is a massive opportunity to do more reserach &development in the area of creating Apps customised for the Nigerian/African market. Apps are big money and RIM have ignored their african fan base in this regard for too long.
4. Finally, anyone who believes that an African market can not sustain a global business should see the financial statements of MTN and even more incredible - Guinness. FYI - Nigeria is the single highest contributor to Guinness global sales figures...even higher than Ireland the home of Guinness. RIM need to do what Guinness did, make the blackberry the ultimate symbol of communication for the Nigerian consumer. My two cents.

akereconfi: Here I am.....currently under the RSSDA scholarship, finished my Pre-A level refresher course....doin TOEFL class. I applied in for Medicine buh now am having a change of mind to Bsc in ICT...and am to go to either Chitkara University India or Manchester University England. My parents ( espcially my dad is shoutin that I must do Medicine buh right from childhool......ICT has being my hobby, I spend sleepless nights wf my PC, I hav a strong drive for ICT, I download ebooks n read dem on my own. A friend of mine finished from Inida wf first class (7:5 out of 10) he advised me to choose Inda over England.

Plzz I need advice from experts here......as to career in Medicine n ICT
thanks

Note that its possible to combine medicine and ICT; Go and read up on "Telemedicine" and decide if its for you; thats the future of medicine. Good luck young dude!

lagbaja: I was fascinated when i read the story of Wande this morning. I was particularly curios about his $2m investment claim, the company's claim of net-worth of N1billion and the customer base of 20,000 subscribers. I quickly set out to investigate the story and to learn from their practice.I went to the computer village and made enquiries about the company. Not so many people knew about them. eventually, i was directed to one of the vendors that sells their voucher. I asked to buy a voucher, he told me the different product offers, i settled for the N200 voucher. he said i could not use it until I register, however the person to register me was not around. i offered to go to the company's head office to do my registration. he gave me a flier that bears the head office address. before leaving i asked him how many such vendors like him existed for the oxygen network, he estimated it to be about 20. i also asked how much his daily sales is, he said it was between N1k and 2k. By implication, the total sales within the computer village for 26 days by 20 voucher resellers and at an average sales of 2k per reseller will be about N1m. i eventually locate the company. The company was situated in a small shop on 12 Francis Oremeji st. They share office with another small company called Jolasons Nigeria Limited. the company does not in any way reflect a N2m sales company talk less of a N1billion worth. I met 2 staff eating ice and beans in the office. the office is barely empty with no signs of activity. i asked to register for their service. he directed me t go and look for vendors around. so much for a N1billion Naira company

The lesson in all of this is that you should look before you leap. secondly , don't believe all that you read in the papers, particularly punch. you can achieve your dreams and attain greatness, but dont build on weak foundations.

Please give this man an award for investigative journalism! well done, I value your analysis. However, note that company valuation is based on Present Value of Projected Net Cash Flows. It all depends on what the company has projected in sales over the next five years. Remember, that Microsoft and Virgin Group started in garages...

kaysy: “I had to trek from Iponrin to Ajose Adeogun to meet him. He was the managing director of a bank then[b][/b]. “/

MD of a Bank with Office on Ajose Adeogun? Source of $2m USD funding riddle solved.

More grease to your elbows young dude.

queensmith: AH AH, I dont believe this story? Isn't vulture meat going to be rare and more expensive than chicken meat? Meanwhile this isn't helping the matters we currently have in london. The BBC racist reporting that Africans are passing off rat meat as chicken, we all know very well that Grass cutters are not vermin and the meat is a delicacy across africa.

Sorry to burst your bubble...but bush meat is RAT.

Countryman93: Projects visited include the ongoing construction of Abuja Mass Transit Railway project, Abuja Airport Road 10 lane project, the National Space Research and Development Centre, New passport office, a rolling stock depot and maintenance base for the Abuja Metropolitan Railway project at Idu Abuja.

While we struggle to improve our transport,power, health and education sectors, we dont need distractions such as "Space Research" please.

God Help us...By the way i'm yet to be convinced that its acceptable to eat bushment/grasscutter; or as i prefer to call them Big RATs!

mizzyboy007: guy, just shut da hell up if u don't know what to say!!!

Yes sir...perharps i'm ill-educated and not very exposed. I apologise to you my "superior" for even attempting to post an opinion on the matter when custodians of knowledge such as yourself are on this forum. But rather than insult sir, why dont you deliver a superior argument or position? But perharps you are more comfortable with raining insults on a Sunday evening?

ebamma2: please the government should stop this attitude of giving cash rewards to our athletes,no country in the world does this, even the spanish team that won the euros and the world cup were not given cash prizes by their government.

Below For Your Information Sir (source is Reuters but you can google it)


The Spain captain, Iker Casillas, has hit back at criticism over the cash bonus each player will be paid if the European champions win the World Cup in South Africa.

Reports in Spain suggest Casillas and his team-mates will each get €600,000 (almost £500,000) should they win Spain's first World Cup, the largest bonus among major contenders.

A spokeswoman for the Spanish football federation would not confirm the amount, which was negotiated with the federation by Casillas and his two vice-captains, Xavi and Carles Puyol.

Haba, N5m (less than 20,000 GBP) cant even buy a disabled access vehicle. Why do we continue to insult these good men and women who flew the flag and did us proud as billions watched world-wide? Meanwhile, our information ministry will gladly pay millions of dollars for a 30 second CNN clip on "Nigeria, good people, good nation" story. The Gold winners deserve disabled access vehicles and N20m cash in 5,000 naira notes please.

2001 4x4 Model - Limited Edition
Used Sparingly in Lagos
V6 Engine
Shiny Black Exterior with Cream Leather Interior
AC is Freezing
Available for Inspection in V.I.
This is a smooth vehicle but rugged enough for Nigerian Roads
N1.5m

SOLD!!!!!

Recent Nairaland Debates
1. Buhari Vs Babangida
2. OBJ Vs Babangida
3. Fela (deceased) Vs MKO (deceased); current debate
4. GEJ Vs MKO (deceased); Re: UNILAG
5. SLS Vs Mama Fela (deceased)
6. SLS vs OBJ

Too many pointless debates about irrelevant matters.

1. Toyota Landcruiser
2. Toyota Prado
3. Toyota 4Runner
4. Toyota FJ Cruiser
5. Honda Pilot

In a nutshell, you cant go wrong with a Toyota truck. Range Rover looks good but all i'll say is remember spare parts and fuel prices. If you must, then go for the Vogue Supercharged..more reliable than the Sports.

alajor: This is sad, so this is what our national stadiums have turned into. I weep for my country nigeria.but i ask,what r the banks in nigeria doing for nigerians apart from making money from our money? Here in southafrica there are 4 banks and these banks have a lot they do for sports. UBA does not own or sponsor anything at home,union bank,zenith what r they doing for nija sports. Almost all the big companies here are into on project or the other just so they can get involved in south african sports. Nigeria i sorry sorry ohhhh. No wonder the super eagles now play their home matches at calabar
hi

emmm, Banks are owned by shareholders and as PLCs are obligated to be profitable and provide positive returns to their shareholders. Banks are doing their jobs please. We should direct such questions at the Minister of Sports etc (who have access to taxpayer Billions for maintainance) and not at Bank MDs.... Haba!!!

How "Convenient" for Barclays...

MODS - is there a problem on NL? there are a series of topics labelled with original post dates of 2007, 2010 etc finding their way to the front page over the last 24hrs. Is it a bug or is someone trying to "remix" old stories?

mmmustapha: If i am ever really in power, the destruction of jews will be my first n important job, world cannot find peace until the Jewish question has been
solved, the Jewish question today was no longer a German problem it had become a world problem, Hitler was right

1. Please go and read your history books. Jews and all non-pure caucasian races would have been exterminated by Hitler, the SS and the Nazi Army. That includes all Nigerians sir.
2. Moderators..please, does blatant talk of genocide now qualify as "free speech"? Abeg o!!

Krucifax: Yes they are paranoid,and they are not due any forgiveness. For years i've been following on the news how Isrealis treat outsiders,be it black Isreali citizens,or naturalised Palestinians,or next door Palestinians and foreigners in general.

You have a point with regards to their foreign policy and attitude towards outsiders. Not many people (including jewish people) will argue with you on that. But the point i am making is that we as Nigerians do not help our case by consistently projecting a negative image to the outside world. In the 80's Nigerians were treated with the highest regard worldwide. In the early 80's, Nigerians were allowed in the UK visa- free (We just got a stamp at the point of entry). Back then,It was Nigeria that was deporting our Ghanian and Togolese brothers inhumanely en-mass (Ghana Must Go Period). But today, we have lost all credibility and the green passport doesnt command respect because our value system is warped. We have a long way to go to "earning back" the respect of the international community.

Ibrahim mr fish: As usual blaim it on boko haram,how many northern go 2 dat country?D truth is they don't want ur sorry asses there,clear and simple.It's a jewish racest state,so xtian fuckoff.

My dear brother, you seem a bit tense and angry? who exactly is your enemy, Israel, fellow Nigerians, Christians, the world?? Take it easy sir, such venom doesnt solve problems it just deepens them. Why dont you use this forum to raise a superior argument and educate the millions of users who visit Nairaland, instead of cursing every second? Only people with deep emotional and psychological problems do that. educate us my brother, so we can understand you.

We can be blindly patriotic in Nigeria sometimes. Some NLanders are already cursing Israel on this story. Please stop and ask yourself why any country would wake up and target immigrants from another country for deportation? Could it be that as a country with one of the best intelligence agencies in the world, they now have access to security information that indicates that the menace of the latest terrorist group in the world - BH, is about to spread its wings beyond the shores of Nigeria? Dont forget we have Israeli agents working closely with our security agents here in Nigeria. Jews have been persecuted since the beginning of time...forgive them if they are a bit paranoid about immigrants from a country that is now churning out panty-bombers and BH extremists.

Sadly 99% of Nigerians will never understand the "underground system" that controls the way this country is run. Every single pronouncement from our leaders has a "hidden" message. I siddon look jeje....

As a kid, i had a pet monkey that did everything on the list except maybe shed tears. Hmmmmm...

AjanleKoko: Still available?

Sorry, SOLD.

By Chika Ezeanya:

Over one year has passed since the Japanese tsunami caused about seven nuclear meltdowns at three reactors in the Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Plant. The immediate result was that about 50 km radius of the plant’s range, dangerous radiation rays affected lives and properties.

Initially, there were tight restrictions on the export of products from the nuclear meltdown affected areas by the Japanese government. As time has passed, the restrictions are becoming more relaxed, and now, more and more products with dangerously high levels of radiation are being shipped to several ill-regulated markets. This is most especially the case with used vehicles, which are hardly subjected to the same level of safety testing as brand new vehicles, prior to shipment.

Immediately after the nuclear incident, governments of countries around the world installed radiation testing equipments at the ports of entry. Australian government was among the first to test 700 vehicles in the June of 2011; this testing has continued till date and thousands of cars are tested monthly.

In Chile, port workers and custom agents staged a protest against their government for not immediately destroying 21 vehicles found with traces of radiation. In the view of the Chilean Nuclear Commission, the radiation levels found was not high enough to cause damage to humans. The workers thought otherwise and forced the government to revisit its decision. In a July 2012 report, Russian government stated that it has so far denied entry to about 300 cars proven to come from the nuclear explosion district and found with very high levels of radiation. The Daily Telegraph of UK not too long ago, reported that fraudulent Japanese used-car dealers were selling vehicles “exposed to dangerously high levels of radiation to unsuspecting buyers.”

Cars having up to twenty times the permissible level of radiation have found their way to African countries where several governments are clueless or unconcerned about such health risks. Governments of Kenya and Tanzania however, are among the few African countries, who, unable to afford the high cost of testing all incoming vehicles have expressly banned the importation of cars from Japan into their markets. Kenyan government went as far as destroying some cars after it hired independent firms to test for radiation levels.

Uganda imports between between 4,000 – 5,000 cars monthly, several of them used. The government of Uganda, concerned about the threat to its citizens sent a delegation to Japan headed by the House committee leader on trade and which included officials of Uganda National Bureau of Standards. The delegations reported upon return that “it was established, through random scientific tests as well as motor vehicle inspection records, that many used motor vehicles destined for export markets from Japan are contaminated with significantly high level of ionizing radiation, way above recommended levels.”



Nigerians buy more used cars than brand new cars, and Japanese cars are the favorite of most first-time and budget car buyers. For the sake of peace of mind, one must desist from thinking of how many radiation drenched cars have already found their way to the Nigerian market. Most radioactive materials settle on the body of the car, windows and seats, and no amount of scrubbing or re-painting or even change of chaircover can remove them. Radioactive agents are highly carcinogenic. Radiation forms cancerous cells and makes them grow aggressively. Other side effects of radiation include infertility, birth defects and irreversible DNA alterations that exposes future generations to yet-to-be ascertained risks.

Although a little belated, the Nigerian government should immediately release a public statement on the stand of the government towards used Japanese cars, or else the health of Nigerian citizens and residents would no longer be assured. It is suggested that Nigerian government should, as a matter of urgency, join its Kenyan and Tanzanian counterparts in placing a temporary ban on importation of used cars from Japan, until it has acquired equipments to test cars for radiation at the various ports of entry.

Credits: Sahara Reporters; Nigerians At Risk : Japanese Radioactive Cars In The Market By Chika Ezeanya

Have all bodies from Dana chash been released? All families compensated? All guilty parties sanctioned? These are the priorities in my mind.

naturalwaves: When d new 5000 naira notes is intriduced,Sellers are going to automatically round off goods whose prices are above 4500 to 5000 and d buyers will bear d brunt.The introduction of that note is definately going to lead to inflation. The protest is highly appreciated.

I dont understand the reasoning behind the "rounding up" issue. People have been selling goods for N4500 for years, why round up to N5000?. Why dont newspaper sellers round up papers to N200 instead of N150? Since we have a N200 note and no N150 note? why is a bottle of coke/fanta N70 and not rounded up to N100? The list is endless. We need to think through some of these assumptions with clarity.