₦airaland Forum

Pchizy:
There's a big difference between a Christian home and otherwise. If you really want to raise a godly family, then, you would have understood the post.
This generation waits to hear their Pastor condemn it before they agree. Some will still be looking for where it is condemned in the Bible.
They never want anything about the cross.
If you "really genuinely want to establish God in your life" as single or as couple,, nobody will dictate twice for you that Porn is devilish.

Or they will wait for Freeze to expatiate more or give a contrary view that supports porn. I think Freeze can use bible verses to back up a claim that.porn is good.

Noloss:
Hmmm, it is difficult to judge from your story only. Are u a full time house wife or working, are u supporting ur hubby in anyway or he is responsible for all the bills? How did u people got to the state u r staying presenlty I.e did he brought u or u did?

I have experienced what u are presently experiencing in the past but not as long as 6months (3people/ 2people for a month or 3wks every other month) It is not easy cos Africa in-laws take wife as slaves(no support in house chores). Even during pregnancy.
U need to endure and probably try ur best but not at the expense of ur family. U need to realise that even giving all ur earnings out so as to please them does not guarrantee that they will be satisfied.

Pray for wisdom to handle this situation cos it needs wisdom. Pray for strength as well to be able to endure and then since ur hubby did not see issues the way u see it(so was mine) u need to thread softly.

Two things restrained (they still come maybe once or twice a year for few days)them from our house.

1. During the pregnancy of our first child 2-3 people do come at a goal to stay for close to a month. I accomodated them, fed them single handedly did virtually all the house chores cos i was agile but our first child was born through CS.

There was enough food at home but[b] I don't even come out of my room until maybe 10am([/b]for a month). If u cannot cook, u will not eat ni ooo. When I was hungry and they don't cook I simply go out and get something for my self. I have beverages at my bedside with hot water. May be they felt slighted(they didn't say it cos we never fought) but when we had the second child they didnt come(who cares)

2. Hubby lost job(couldnt meet their demands anylonger).

May u receive wisdom from above to handle this situation.

In my case, when i come out of my room by 10am or 11,they would be waiting for me to come and make breakfast even with my stitch.

I wonder at such inlaws because when my sisters and I go to visit my brother and his wife, the wife would do anything to prolong our stay because we relieve her of many duties. She hardly cooks when we are there. It is not to go to someone's house and be a burden that makes us inlaws.

For a guy, if he is the first born, he will be the alpha and omega of the family and any woman that marries him is a threat to them

Last born might be spoilt and immature and used to thinhs going his way.

I will go for middle.

A protegé of Ubunja.

Op i understand you too well. Only 2 months and i was praying for God's intervention. 6 months is too long a time for inlaws to come and stay. The burden will be on you. Four of them for that matter.

If it were your family, it would have meant help for you but there is something about a husband's family feeling entitled to you serving them while they sit and cross their legs and even complain endlessly.

The best thing you can do now is to pray and pour out your heart to God stating your reasons. There is no point having quarrels over it with your husband. Let God do the work.

Farmerforlife:
Madame, I will inform you of the stark reality of your situation...stop basing your values on hysterical telenovelas.

Where were you when they were spending sleepless nights taking care of your husband for the first 3 decades of his life, making him into what he is today? Now you want to come out of nowhere into the picture and take him away from doing his duty to them. If my wife made a similar statement, that would be the beginning of the end of our marriage. When you marry a man, you marry his family, it is not an either... or... deal. If you are so fragile that the presence of his family affects your health, go stay in a hotel. They want to exercise their right upon their child and grandchildren.

No offense intended.

So that is why they should come and stay for 6 whole months? 6 months!!! Even if they laboured for their son, he is a married man and their interference in his home is supposed to be limited.

Not even one person,...mother inlaw, father inlaw, brother inlaw with wife. He should just bring his whole village. And they will always find fault in what she does.

Don't form an accent

Don't sag your trousers

Don't try to impress

Smell good

drnoel:
Maybe but only people who haven't been in a steady commitment can blatantly conclude with ur kind of statement. Little girl commitment is not black and white. Its in colour and the eyes can see.

It is what it is. It is what i have seen. And i did mention that it is not everyone who acts that way.

True in a lot of cases. If you see him with another babe or something goes wrong, he will ask "did i ask you out?"

1zynnvn:
What do you do with spare time.?
I only visit Facebook and nairaland.

What sites are on your incognito tabs?

Asowari:
glad I could put a smile on someone face,but seriously that dude is one hell of a kind

of everything to worry about, it is colour of pant that ist the issue

drnoel:
Naive

No naivety here. It is real life

sisisioge:
Ima! They've been flatmates for a while. No seex since January last year. Refused to completely accept extended olive branch. Prefers to stay on whatsap till midnight possibly chatting with her church members... Etc. Pls go and retake the Idetective 101 class

Chai!!! Sorry Detective Sisisioge

Not all of us. I think i like football more than i am willing to admit. I catch myself watching highlights when i am alone.

Fmartin:
some wear colored pants when they are menstruating.. But some dirty ones wear colored pants to conceal its dirtyness as they wear it for days.....

Pls i don't think any sensible human being wears panties more than once before washing it

Asowari:
so of all the problems that is happing in Nigerian, na woman pant be ur headache? my broda ur matter weak me.

You got me laughing all by myself. Now people are thinking i am going crazy

For that number 1, if someone is avoiding my calls and you know you should pick especially if it is a debtor or hubby. I will call you continuously that the only options would be to call me back or switch off your phone.

Yes but in another country...maybe Germany, Singapore,France. Yes i prefer France

sisisioge:
Your wife is seeing someone else. You're gonna have to deal with that first. Catch her at it so you two can talk about the whole "marriage " thing. Don't ruin your health because of an inevitable situation. Pele.... It is well.

Seriously how did you come to this conclusion?

ubunja:
and next im gay! and next i have a small dick! and next .....
dont you vagina worshipping gents get tired of bowing to the hole? i mean YES we came from it but c'mon ...

This is serious!!!

Male empowerment

SAMBARRY:
you should be able to know those ones are just pained loosers.people like them are everywhere in every work sector in Nigeria

For them to have such mentality, it means that whatever minute thing they have achieved,they had to sleep their way through to get it.

Very shallow minded people here. Because she is a woman, it has to be that she didn't earn the position or deserve it but she got it through dubious means.

The annoying part is that even ladies here are making such demeaning comments...ladies that have not achieved anything tangible in their lives.

Look at her portfolio and let it speak for her

In my own culture, we answer our father's first name as our middle name including the boys. It is not a gender or feminist thing. Our own second name is not useful in any documents.

Usually when we get married, the women don't only change their surnames to their husband's own but also the middle name which is their father's name. My mum also had our father's name as her middle name. Everyone had the same middle name.

It doesn't make me a less fulfilled person than the person that decides to stick with her own name or whatever. It is the culture and i didn't see any need to change or oppose it.

You need to leave that area where you live. Move around. Get some exposure lad.

Don't stay in your corner and make assumptions based on the girls passing your "door-mot" or "yard".

I didn't just changed my last name...i also changed my middle name to his first name


Pls click and vote.

https://www.cussonsbaby.com.ng/campaign/cbm5-top-500/entry?id=389425

If you go ahead and mend things with her and marry her, will your mind be at rest?

You know what you should do from your answer.

What was wrong with the picture?

The decision of whether to stay or leave is one that can only be made by you. You wear the shoes...so you know where it hurts.

Are you dependent on him for everything? How is your self esteem? A woman should also command respect from her husband. It is not only the men that should be respected. He also needs to show the wife respect.

A man that can just slap his wife at will doesn't have respect for her and her feelings. If you are going to stay, i suggest you work on yourself. ..your confidence level, self esteem, your looks,etc. Be outspoken but not insultive. Let it begin to sink into him that you won't take any rubbish anymore.

But please your life is important. Report any threat to your life to the appropriate authorities.


Guys pls help take Edima to top 100. Click and vote

https://www.cussonsbaby.com.ng/campaign/cbm5-top-500/entry?id=389425

Acidosis
Sisioge

It is really not anybody's business to know the details of your life except family and close friends.

A lot of people tend to envy other's progress and compare your achievements with theirs.

But you should try not to answer rudely when asked. Just be diplomatic and wise about your response.


People pls vote my babe

https://www.cussonsbaby.com.ng/campaign/cbm5-top-500/entry?id=389425

drnoel:
Why we ask men to get to know d woman before saying I do

Maybe it is women who know that their husbands are womanizers and would use any excess money to spend on women. Rather than use her money to fund the household needs while he drinks and spends on outsiders, she decides to act that way.

Blackmail you for what? What does she have on you? And are you sure you are not shooting yourself in the foot by bringing the issue online?

Pls click and vote Edima.

https://www.cussonsbaby.com.ng/campaign/cbm5-top-500/entry?id=389425

Another thing to instil fear again