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InkedNerd's Posts

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RomanceRe: On A Cross Road; He Needs Ur Advice! by InkedNerd(f): 7:53am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
Let's just say you are missing the point. This aint about gender compartmentalization! This is about using the minute details to differentiate btw 2 women he's finding hard to make a choice from!! wink
No my lame brained friend, you're the one missing the point--not I. You and this dimwitted idea on how to "differentiate" between the two women is nothing more than an age old practice of using a gender based notion of measuring a woman's worth. Having gone used this foolish method does not in any way determine who is better or worse.

[quote author=Ch@nges link=topic=868155.msg10170934#msg10170934 date=1328940623]It seems like ladies are against the trick, i'm against it as well.

@1st advicer, remember at first, he wasn't using those tricks and if he suddenly initiate them, the ladies will feel nothing but disappointed and you know what that means. What i'm saying is that it's too late to apply those trick, he could apply them at the begining of the relationship.

So, we need our ladies here to suggest a better way.[/quote]Of course I'm against it! How would you as a man feel if you found out that a woman was testing or judging your based solely on your finances? Trickery is no way to build the foundation to ones future.
RomanceRe: My Happiness For Her Life by InkedNerd(f): 7:43am On Feb 11, 2012
[quote author=Ch@nges link=topic=868016.msg10171012#msg10171012 date=1328942009]He needs advice and not insults, bullpoos!!

@OP hmmmmmm this is a serious problem, and if i were in your shoes i'll call my fiancé and tell her what's on board(but get ready coz she'll be disappointed). But let her know you don't love the oyinbo gurl(if only u don't truly love her).

I think her response will pave a way out. Try it and hear from her. Who knows? She might as well have someone she loves there and will be willing to xtend the relationship with him. With that, you guys can easily think together towards your futures respectively.[/quote]He doesn't need any damn advice! He made his bed not let him lie in it. If anything, he should entrench himself further by asking her to be his second wife. If he was grown enough to go out of his way and step out on his girlfriend then he is grown enough to take care of this nonsense on his own. As an individual who who knew what the consequences can be for cheating on a partner, he is now paying for it. If he didn't want trouble, he should have kept his pants on.
RomanceRe: Opening The Door For Ladies by InkedNerd(f): 7:35am On Feb 11, 2012
Konnektions146:
ladies are like children, u do a particular thin and yu stop doin it, it becomes an issue, so its better yu nerver start.
in fact, i ve never done it, it does crosses my mind but  wen i rememeber i may not always do it , mehn, i bone am.

so its better the lady opens de door herself rather than wait for me to turn off the engine, alight and run to open de car, abeg there re beter way to be gentlemanly.
Common decency doesn't kill people ya know. Despsite whatever foolish notions you have about what women are or how we operate, we are nothing like children just as you men are not the dogs that some women proclaim you to be.
RomanceRe: Opening The Door For Ladies by InkedNerd(f): 7:26am On Feb 11, 2012
Oletunow:
So many times have you been so polite to open the door for males or your husband? Or does this politeness of a gesture only cut one way?, I was brought up to believe that, what is good for the goose is equally good for the gander, or isn't it so?
What makes you think I've never opened a door for a guy before or done things like that for a guy?
RomanceRe: See What A Nigerian Man Bought For His Naija Girl For Valentine Day by InkedNerd(f): 7:22am On Feb 11, 2012
kaykaybaba:
*in love with inked_nerd* kiss kiss
Awww kiss

Metalgoong:
Dey there! . . . . If u want, make u no go find another gal. . . If u keep on waitin for[b] inked_nerd[/b], na im be say [b]Konji [/b]go kill you sooner than later, even before val day grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
Abeg leave am.

BigBenoski:
very true 2 ur handle. Please dont tell me u also dorn coca cola bottle 4 eye glasses
lol no I don't have glasses [I used to though], but that is a tale I will tell some other time grin
RomanceRe: On A Cross Road; He Needs Ur Advice! by InkedNerd(f): 1:31am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
Whoever said women are all about cooking and cleaning? This is someone you are about coming into his life. What makes you different from the other lady? He's at crossroads, confused. He values both women equally. They are not jobless ladies. Cooking and cleaning is part of her roles as a wife, although not restricted to her alone, a wife CANNOT skip that responsibility in all totality. If that is the "only" test that would help him differentiate from the two ladies, then what tha heck? He's NOT basing the test as a prerequisite for finding a wife, for he has found "two" already. . . Just Differentiation!
I'm replying based on how you worded your response so stop acting as though I just presented you with new information. With that being said, you said "Leave his house in a mess anytime he wants to invite each one over. A caring lady will notice the state of his house and do something about it.", "Always suggest eating out. . . " which lead to my comment about cooking and cleaning. You used those lines as though such tests are the only ways to determine if someone can or will make a good wife--these are YOUR words, not mine. Being at a crossroad is no reason to employ lame brain ideas. No woman's duty is too cook and clean. Just because YOU choose to assert these indoctrinated gender roles doesn't make it true. Like I said before, had the script been flipped and a woman came here talking about testing a man financially, you and your likes would be getting up in arms and proclaiming that there is more to a man than his money. Everything which I have mentioned about cooking and cleaning are in relation to the implied comments which YOU made. All I simply did was decipher it. You laid the foundation to this implication, not I.
RomanceRe: On A Cross Road; He Needs Ur Advice! by InkedNerd(f): 12:49am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
^^There are roles of a husband, and there are roles of a wife. I see nothing wrong if a woman is tested with the roles of a wife. It would be a shame if any woman tests a man with the roles of a woman, rather that that of a man!
A woman's "role" or purpose in life isn't to be your personal maid or personal cook. Your the sort that would have the audacity to open your mouth and complain if a woman decided to test a man on his finances. There is more to women than just cooking and cleaning, and if you choose to limit your thinking to just that then I feel sorry for the woman who may some day become a permanent fixture in your life.
RomanceRe: On A Cross Road; He Needs Ur Advice! by InkedNerd(f): 12:36am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
^^Firsthand experience from a couple of married ones around me! They were in a similar situation with the OP. Hey, he doesnt need to follow it! wink
Well that's quite sad to hear that such things were used as a means of choosing a spouse. You're right, he doesn't have to and he shouldn't! Had such "advice" been reversed and a woman tried the exact same thing here, she'd get nothing but insults for setting up a test to see if a guy would clean up after her.
RomanceRe: On A Cross Road; He Needs Ur Advice! by InkedNerd(f): 12:25am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
Let him use the "Elimination Method". cheesy Let him:
~Leave his house in a mess anytime he wants to invite each one over. A caring lady will notice the state of his house and do something about it.
~Always suggest eating out. A caring lady will care less about eating out, and would be more concerned about his thriftiness.
~Make up spurious gossips against his very close friends or family members. A st[i]u[/i]pid lady will take his side, instead of trying to calm him down.
~Pretend he is broke. If he has a car, let him park it somewhere and lie that it's been sold.
~Arrange for friends to always harass him over a spurious debt. To be continued. . .

These are things some of my married friends did before they finally chose a wife, and it worked for them. If she's not concerned about your personal affairs when you are contemplating marriage, she probably will not when you finally marry her. When it comes to the issue of choosing a wife, all hands must be on deck else you make a mistake of a lifetime. There are a lot of "ladies" but "wives" are a microscopical few.

May the best lady win! cheesy
Biko, tell me how you came up with this lame brain method. A woman cleaning your house, following nonsense gossip, pretending to be broke, will not prove that a woman loves you. It's foolish trickery like that that can lead to mistrust and breakups. How about you go back to the drawing board and come up with a more intelligent manner to solve this guy's friend's dilemma.
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 12:19am On Feb 11, 2012
TroyJay:
Haba. I'm Henry. angry We need Peter and Mimi. grin
Oops, I made a mistake. Biko, no vex grin
Dating And Meet-up ZoneRe: Can I Meet : Ehmmmmmmmm: Anybody? by InkedNerd(f): 12:12am On Feb 11, 2012
lol, no problem smiley
RomanceRe: Can You Marry A Virgin Man ? by InkedNerd(f): 12:00am On Feb 11, 2012
@OP: Yes, I can marry a male virgin just as long as he has the qualities I am looking for in a man.
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 11:57pm On Feb 10, 2012
TroyJay:
I'll play Henry. . . He was the one that Mimi finally followed. grin
Ok, so who's gonna play Henry and Mimi? Any takers? grin
RomanceRe: Husband Beating In Kenya Is Very Common: National Emergency! by InkedNerd(f): 11:52pm On Feb 10, 2012
claremont:
There is absolutely no way in hell you can tell me that the whole of 150,000-300,000 men all started being drunks after they got married. It's not possible, you sef check am now!
I never said that claremont, so please don't put words in my mouth. I simply asked a series of questions because based on the way you worded your response it sounded as though you knew with the utmost certainty that theses supposed drunks have always been drunks.
RomanceRe: Husband Beating In Kenya Is Very Common: National Emergency! by InkedNerd(f): 11:45pm On Feb 10, 2012
claremont:
There is no justification for husband battery no matter how much he drinks. The ladies involved in this knew fully well that their husbands were drunks even before they got married to them, and they still married them. This logic shows that husband battery is a trait that may be innate in females from that section of the country, they will still batter their husbands regardless of whether he drinks or not.
Can you please tell me, how on Earth you or anyone else knows that these women knew that these men were drunks beforehand or that they were fully aware? Just curious but do you live with them? Did you grow up with them? Do you know any of them personally?
FamilyRe: What Do I Do? by InkedNerd(f): 11:39pm On Feb 10, 2012
coogar:
if every woman keeps leaving her marriage, no one else would be married.
i was actually being sarcastic when i posted that - she should persevere. . . .most of y'all women don't know what it takes to be a man.
it's burdensome!
Oh gee, poor you. It must be terrible to live in a society that bends of over backwards to your attics and allows you to see live a life where you benefit from double standards. Poor you! tongue
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 11:27pm On Feb 10, 2012
uniqueren:
Poster ---- uche jumbo

mimi-----rita Dominic

henry----van vicker

peter.----most likely to be nonso diobi or ''Tony umezie''
LOL grin

TroyJay:
Fat chance! When Inked nerd and a host of us are waiting on the line?
I'll play the poster in these roles if given the opportunity. I'm quite sure I can be just as convincing as she can grin
RomanceRe: Husband Beating In Kenya Is Very Common: National Emergency! by InkedNerd(f): 11:18pm On Feb 10, 2012
claremont:
^^
I would argue that women are equally abusive to their husbands as well. The only reason the statistics point to a higher incidence of men abusing women is because of the African male ego. A husband would rather die in silence than complain that his wife physically abuses him at home. Therein lies the problem!

Thank god that the men of Kenya are starting to wake up and let the whole world know that domestic abuse works both ways.
In as much as I have argued on behalf of men that do not come forward to report their own abuse I highly doubt that the abuse is of an equal scale. Yes, its good that these men are reporting these abuse they're being subjected to and yes, abuse does go both ways but to honestly sit here and say it is of an equal nature is quite preposterous. As pendo89 mentioned, some of these men getting beaten day in and out, are usually drunkards who refuse to work like the rest or just silly adulterers--while these men are being subjected to physical abuse, it would seem that some of these women may be emotionally abuse especially given the fact that some of these women though they may be married, may possibly be the one within the household actually taking care of the household affairs. Upon being subjected to having to care for the household affairs, some of these women are being taken advantage of financially. It's one thing to care for children and work, its another thing to feel that because of marriage you're then obligated to care for a grown and competent adult. In all, abuse of all sorts is wrong regardless of the gender being affected. And while I don't believe that the report as a whole is false, I do believe that there are indeed holes within this report.
RomanceRe: Husband Beating In Kenya Is Very Common: National Emergency! by InkedNerd(f): 11:02pm On Feb 10, 2012
@OP: Just wondering, why did you label this as a national emergency? Women all over Africa are being abused at a much higher rate than their male counterparts so why was there such a need to label this as a national emergency?

pendo89:
Onila why dint you paste this below that pic? see I hadnt read the story in full but I said there must be a story behind each pic.

Mr Simon Kiguta, 40, and a father of two recovers .Mr Kiguta claims that he was attacked at night by his wife with a panga after he came home drunk on Monday night.
Please ask her because this is starting to look one sided--not that I'm saying domestic violence of any sort is acceptable.
Dating And Meet-up ZoneRe: Can I Meet : Ehmmmmmmmm: Anybody? by InkedNerd(f): 10:50pm On Feb 10, 2012
dommfa:
cry cry cry
Eh ya, just post more and make yourself known. With time, people will talk to you. Remember, you did say that you were passive member wink
RomanceRe: To Ladies:it Is Trade By Barter For This Year Valentine by InkedNerd(f): 10:41pm On Feb 10, 2012
Lmao, did you just refer to KFC and Chicken Republic as an expensive dinner? grin grin grin

Nice exchanges though cheesy
FamilyRe: What Do I Do? by InkedNerd(f): 10:40pm On Feb 10, 2012
Daresh:
As much as I want to forgive, it is really hard. We had a very long conversation about it all and he discussed from the root to the tip of the matter. The truth is, I dont know what to believe anymore. I dont even believe he is no longer in contact with her.  And yes andromida you are right, I feel he took her side over mine although he claims he just didnt want any confrontation btw us that she had already told him she was leaving so he just wanted her to leave without thinking I would ever find out. Unfortunately I found out about a day too late to attack her. I asked him to leave my house and he did for a few days,but we have 2 children, and they love their father. I know I owe it to them to give it another shot but I've told him, this is the last time. We have been on this issue for almost 3 weeks and I cannot go through this kind of drama anymore. I have told his mum and brothers, everyone is disappointed because they know the said female, told my family so they wont be surprised if I leave him. If anyone one knows any creative ways to get back at d heifer for insulting me, please let me know.
Although I think it would be nice tear the "other woman" to pieces, I think you should let her be. If it were I, I probably would have told her husband about the whole thing so she can have a bit of drama in her marriage but hey, that's just me. It's good that you told both sides of your family, that way they won't say the news came out of left field. Like I always say, children aren't stupid--they can tell when somethings up even if you don't tell them. Ultimately the decision is up to you. You know what kind of man he is so tread lightly my sista.
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 10:23pm On Feb 10, 2012
[quote author=Ch@nges link=topic=868086.msg10169475#msg10169475 date=1328908709]@OP Don't worry babe, mimi will snatch your unwanted pregnancy from you. Trust me[/quote]lmao grin
FamilyRe: What Do I Do? by InkedNerd(f): 10:04pm On Feb 10, 2012
flash11:
I will say it again, kick his sorry cheating arse out!!! Or else you will come again tomorrow crying, cos he will cheat on you again and again and again, and subsequent ones will be more painful than the previous!
OP, listen to this guy. Even the guys are telling you to leave that sniveling creature you call a husband.
FamilyRe: What Do I Do? by InkedNerd(f): 9:45pm On Feb 10, 2012
@OP: You know sometimes I can't help but wonder what kind inbred stupidity that leads African women to stay in such situations. It's no longer a matter of marriage having challenges. He has clearly demonstrated not only does he not respect you, he doesn't care how his actions affect you. If he has done it in the past, he will surely do it again. As a woman, what you choose to do about it will determine the quality of life you will love.
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 9:39pm On Feb 10, 2012
[quote author=TroyJay. link=topic=868086.msg10169190#msg10169190 date=1328905703]The clincher was when Peter metamorphosed to henry, and story ended as Henry. . . This movie would need a better director. This kind of mistake is totally unacceptable![/quote]Hahaha grin
RomanceRe: I'll Tear Them Apart! by InkedNerd(f): 9:18pm On Feb 10, 2012
[quote author=TroyJay. link=topic=868086.msg10169059#msg10169059 date=1328904598]This story is faker than Nicki Minaj's Backside.
[/quote]So very true. Glad to know I wasn't the only person that felt that way.

slimyem:
sounds like some old nollywood movie that featured genevieve and omotola,
I dont believe this!
It probably is grin
RomanceRe: See What A Nigerian Man Bought For His Naija Girl For Valentine Day by InkedNerd(f): 9:15pm On Feb 10, 2012
Metalgoong:
Below is[b] Lefulefu[/b] and Mr Cork shopping Val gifts for[b] Onila[/b]  . . .  grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
LOL LOL grin grin grin
FashionRe: Best Body Lotion For Dry Skin by InkedNerd(f): 9:03pm On Feb 10, 2012
I don't use lotions much. If I do, it is usually on my feet but I don't use it often in my feet. I usually stick with oils and my homemade body and hair butters. Just the idea of putting lotion on my body feels nasty to me tongue

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