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Crime / Re: 17-year-old Peace Asukwo Commits Suicide Over Disagreement With Yoruba Boyfriend by IyaBasira: 8:27pm On Nov 12, 2010 |
She was so pretty!!!!!!! But her elder sister sounds suspicious. Why would her own sister ask her to collect 20, 000 Naira from an unknown man at 9 pm the day before the incident happened And then after that, she decided to sleep over in the man's house Completely weird. |
Celebrities / Re: Genevieve Nnaji Naija Photo Shoot. by IyaBasira: 5:09pm On Nov 12, 2010 |
I think it's the light for some reason . . . There's tooooo much of it in those pictures. I thought she looked nice overall , but i have to admit, when I saw the first picture the first thought that ran through my head was " I think Genevieve is getting old, ". |
Family / Re: O God When Will The Answer Come I Am So N Happy by IyaBasira: 1:27am On Nov 11, 2010 |
kitty kat: Yes, they threatened you. Yes, they labelled you a witch and a wicked woman. But did you faint and break your head on the toilet seat because you thought you were not pregnant? Some things are very important, yes, but not to the extent that you lose total control of yourself because you did not get pregnant. The woman in this story was ready to kill herself if she did not have a child. She had only been married for 3 years. Some people are married for more than that without children and they would look very foolish if they said their life depended on them having a child, because it means they have no reason to still be alive. Laugh if you want, but bear in mind that even the Bible says "Children are a gift from the Lord". Did you hear that? A gift! Which means that no matter how often you pray, it is up to him and it is in HIS time! So there was no need for her to give herself so much unnecessary headache. |
Family / Re: O God When Will The Answer Come I Am So N Happy by IyaBasira: 5:14pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
The story is ok. I initially enjoyed the story until she said that her life depended on her having a child. That was when i switched off. Can I ask a question? Why? Just why? Why should having a child become the be - all and end- all of her existence? When will women WAKE UP?! What happened to adopting a child? "Oh no, I don't want to adopt another man's child / adopted children always turn out to be bad" is what some of these foolish women say. If every barren couple in the world adopted a child each, maybe the world would be a better place by now. But you expect God to give you your own child with such a selfish mindset? What happened to improving herself so she achieves something with the life that was given to her, so that when she eventually gets a child, she's a better mother than she would have been if she had wasted 3 years crying? (which is what she eventually did , anyway.) It's not fantastic , just another Nigerian woman letting her mother-in-law bully her. Where's the originality in that? |
Romance / Re: Should I Tell Her Under The Circumstances? by IyaBasira: 4:45pm On Nov 06, 2010 |
omega25red: I don't blame my friend. I never blamed her for what happened and I know where the fault lies. But thanks for your input anyway. Missy ★ B: She is still my friend but no longer can i call her a close friend because I don't feel that close towards her any more. The time when I considered her to be my closest friend was before she made the statement of not having any obligations towards me. I prefer to read between the lines of what people say so I still talk to her, we still gist about stuff but I'm not stupid. I don't expect anything from her any more. |
Romance / Re: Should I Tell Her Under The Circumstances? by IyaBasira: 4:02pm On Nov 06, 2010 |
Missy ★ B: You ignored my main question. Which was this : [b]After all, it's only friends that have obligations towards each other, right? [/b] Yorisb: Did you want me to write the names of everyone involved? D-sense: You are a guy, right? Cool. You have a girlfriend who is cheating on you and your best friend chooses not to tell you. Later you discover that your best friend's girl is cheating on him. Would you tell him? |
Romance / Should I Tell Her Under The Circumstances? by IyaBasira: 3:05pm On Nov 06, 2010 |
Hi People! Ok, so I have a burning question to put before the Honourable Panel of Nairaland. The issue is that once I was going out with someone who eventually started toasting one of my friends. All of my other friends knew, but none of them told me. I didn't really expect them to do so because they were closer to her than to me. But there was one person who i considered my closest friend of the lot , mainly because i had met her at the beginning of the year and introduced her to the girl who started going out with my bf without my knowledge. So anyway, the main point is this. As I said, I considered her my closest friend so when the gist came out, I asked her why she didnt tell me. She had a lot of reasons, such as that we were quarrelling a lot, she felt closer to the other girl as a friend and so on, but the main reason she gave , and I quote , was " I'm not under any obligation to tell you anything." So one issue is that if she can say something like that, then doesn't that mean that we are not really friends? After all, it's only friends that have obligations towards each other, right? She is still my friend but no longer can i call her a close friend because I don't feel that close towards her any more. The other issue is, this same "closest friend" has a boyfriend. And in an ironic twist , he is cheating on her. And I know about it because a reliable source told me. Am I under an obligation to tell her this? |
Family / Re: Should She End Her Marriage? by IyaBasira: 1:05pm On Nov 06, 2010 |
harakiri: AMEN to that. @ Harakiri; I am pleasantly surprised! You always seemed like the Anti-women type so I kind of expected you to say it serves her right. Or something along that line. |
Family / Re: Should She End Her Marriage? by IyaBasira: 12:37pm On Nov 06, 2010 |
johndoe200: Am I the only person who saw that? So you have been married for many years and getting another man's wife drunk so u and your friends can sleep with her is how you catch your trips. So what they say is true !!! Age doesn't signify maturity at ALL! On the other hand . . . thousands of johndoe's are here just like you on Nl looking for their piece of the spotlight. E.g , Mr. Cork, and many others. Enjoy your time in the limelight, you hear? |
Music/Radio / Re: Onyeka Onwenu Stands Up For Toni Payne. by IyaBasira: 2:34pm On Nov 04, 2010 |
mama-gee: Such are the rantings of a bonehead. I assume you have met Ms. Payne and therefore you know all she is and all there is to her, right? mbulela: You cannot ignore everything that comes to your attention. This Ms. Payne has had a lot of bad press. And even at the beginning of her letter, Onyeka said that it was only a very serious matter that would make her write a letter to that Azuka woman. That should tell you that she isn't just writing because she has nothing left to do with her time. |
Romance / Re: He Said He Would Stop Being A Playah If I Go Out With Him by IyaBasira: 12:19am On Nov 01, 2010 |
Depends on the state of her heart and how greedy she is. If she loves her bf , let her say no. If she fancies the other guy, let her say yes. Besides, the players excuse doesnt make sense. I mean where he tells her not to tell her bf that he has multiple gf's because of trust. What has trust got to do with it? Its his life and however many girls he dates is his business. |
Romance / Re: Urgent Advise Needed,her Boyfriend Said He Only Needs A Child From Her Not Marriage by IyaBasira: 11:53pm On Oct 31, 2010 |
Ofido: Well this situation is very simple. If she wants to get married, then she needs to break up with him pronto. If she wants to be a baby mama, then she should stay with him and bear as many kids as she can. As for the second bolded part, all I have to say is; Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are. In my opinion ,your friends are sick. They need deliverance. And from the looks of it, you may need it as well. |
Family / Re: Nigerian Men Should Marry As Many Women As They Can - Dr. Umeham by IyaBasira: 7:14am On Oct 21, 2010 |
Outstrip: Bingo. |
Family / Re: Hated For Not Having A Male Child: What Will You Do? by IyaBasira: 11:25pm On Oct 20, 2010 |
Wait . . . you mean things like this still happen? |
Family / Re: 1 by IyaBasira: 1:20pm On Oct 20, 2010 |
oisehumen: Thanks . . . But I'm not close to getting married at all, I'm afraid. I'm just 19. Lol. |
Family / Re: 1 by IyaBasira: 11:56am On Oct 20, 2010 |
Ivynwa: I think you are completely wrong with that one. Why aren't you against anybody marrying to get papers? That is the root of the maltreatment you spoke about in your post. Lets assume that A sees B as a means to an end and not an end in itself. When the means that B can provide are exhausted, the maltreatment begins because there is nothing more to be gained from that union. A man cannot maltreat his wife if he genuinely cherishes her and her presence in his life. If we can stop people from marrying unsuspecting white women just for papers, then we will be able to get rid of the issues that arise when the white women feel neglected and unloved. I wonder why you are against maltreatment and not the fact that some people are merely using others for all that they can get. If we look at life from a cynical point of view, then we are actually all using each other. For instance we could say that I am using you to demonstrate my own point of view. But if that hurts you or your well being in the long run, then isnt it better for me not to do it at all? Despite the fact that people say Oyinbos may marry and divorce as much as they like, they are still human beings and if they marry a man it is only because they think he will make them happy. You are right to say that its not fair to maltreat people , but marrying them for reasons other than love is also a different kind of maltreatment. It is deception ,and emotional abuse because you tell a white woman you love her when all you want is papers. That's all it is. |
Romance / Re: Why I Stole Your Man by IyaBasira: 6:20am On Oct 16, 2010 |
@MrBrownJay; Please don't argue with him any longer. Hopefully he will realize the error of his thoughts before he gets too old to change them. |
Romance / Re: Switching Roles/Shoe On The Other Foot by IyaBasira: 1:43am On Oct 11, 2010 |
adagz 01: Can we focus on the main problem here which is "NIGERIAN MEN who cheat"and not "WESTERN WOMEN who marry and divorce as many times as they like". omohwunmmy: Ermmmmm . . . I was NOT supporting the blogger's statement. I was being sarcastic when I mentioned it but maybe I didnt make that clear. I personally thought it was a very stupid analogy for the main reason that men are not dogs, even though they seem to have a lot in common with the species. Lol. Inked_Nerd: Inked - Nerd ; Thanks. I'm trying not to let it affect me. But its extremely hard. I know its bad to feel that way, especially if the guy was faithful. If he was then I feel sorry for him, but most of the time I'm just glad that there is one less guy to say "African Men, not women are programmed to spread their seed and so it is acceptable when a man cheats but abominable when a woman does." |
Romance / Re: Switching Roles/Shoe On The Other Foot by IyaBasira: 2:16pm On Oct 10, 2010 |
I have a friend who is dating this girl he is supposedly in love with. We were talking on yahoo ms gr one day when he told me he had friends with benefits on the side. And I couldn't help telling him how interesting it was that he didn't think that what he was doing was actually cheating. Now I am what a lot of people call "naive" which tends to mean that I see things only in black and white. So most of the time, I may see something that someone does and label them a bad person while others would try to identify with the person. Well, because the person I just mentioned is my friend, I didn't go so far as to tell him that he was a bad person , of course, but I was not amused when he called those girls providing him with benefits "bitches". It showed me a little about a boy's point of view anyway. Firstly they can cheat on the girl and think that it isn't cheating. I also read the thread about the girl who saw condoms in her boyfriends car and how a lot of the guys said it wasn't cheating because they weren't married, and it only made me realize that guys seem to like living in denial. It could also explain why they take it so hard when a woman cheats on them - because they never think the game can turn against them. I once read a blog where a guy tried to explain men cheating as an escapist sort of behaviour, by which he meant that men who cheat try to dissociate themselves from reality. That I agree with. But then he also said that "The fact that a dog often runs away from home doesn't mean it isn't a good dog". Now if only men would think the same way about women who cheated on them. Secondly, they cheat on the girl and then begin to hate the other woman. Supposedly for complying to their wish? Like I said, my friend called the other girls he was sleeping with "bitches". Why? Why insult the other woman when you know yourself that if it wasn't her, it would have been someone else? I think it's a form of self- loathing, but in which they refuse to see the part they played and then blame the other woman. A guy may dislike what he has done or is doing but will not admit any fault. It is the fault of his dad, because his dad was always cheating on his mom, or the fault of his friends for influencing him, or the fault of the other woman. Why? Because she was there, she was available, and she took part in it. I think women are partly to blame for this. Some women spoil their sons rotten, not with clothes or flashy cars, but with lack of moral training which eventually deadens their consciences. They make them believe that they can do no wrong and they grow up with superiority complexes that turn them into their own worst enemies as they grow older. The effect it has on me; I read a lot of blogs and stuff so to me this is a never-ending question. It's like the question of "Why is there so much evil in the world?" and we all know that is one question that can't really be answered. This is one of those questions. It's like some sort of unspoken code amongst guys that you don't really become a man in the true sense of the word until you've cheated on at least one of your girlfriends. I cannot count how many guys I know who have cheated on their girlfriends. And it makes me extremely paranoid, to the extent that I have realized that I feel happy when I hear of a girl who cheats on a guy, just because I'm tired of hearing how many guys cheat on their girlfriends. |
Crime / Re: Policeman Impregnates Daughter 4 Times by IyaBasira: 6:42pm On Oct 08, 2010 |
MrPrsdent: I think you are a beast. How can you say that? Dont say things like that cos its not even funny. |
Romance / Re: I Am The Most Handsome Guy In Nairaland by IyaBasira: 5:54pm On Oct 08, 2010 |
So not only did this get 10 pages of comments, it ALSO made it to the front page. Nairaland is going to the dogs. |
Family / Re: Am I Over Reacting? by IyaBasira: 9:39pm On Oct 05, 2010 |
This is painful . . . How can they give you a curfew at age 27 . . .?! All you have to do now is get out as fast as you can. I can tell you for a fact that their clutches will be on your neck until you get married and maybe even beyond that. Don't bother arguing anymore. Just find a flat in Abuja, or go back to the US. They say that familiarity breeds contempt. Since that is the case, all you have to do is make yourself an unfamiliar presence. |
Romance / Re: Pastors’ Advice On Chastity Earns Me Menopause As Spinster by IyaBasira: 5:52am On Oct 03, 2010 |
IBEXY: Dude, please tell me you are joking. Cos the woman you described seems too extreme to be true. No eating out? No movies (Not even Christian ones?) This story reminds me of the Christian joke below. It had been raining for days and days, and a terrible flood had come over the land. The waters rose so high that one man was forced to climb onto the roof of his house. As the waters rose higher and higher, a man in a rowboat appeared, and told him to get in. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the rowboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him. The waters rose higher and higher, and suddenly a speedboat appeared. "Climb in!" shouted a man in the boat. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the speedboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him. The waters continued to rise. A helicopter appeared and over the loudspeaker, the pilot announced he would lower a rope to the man on the roof. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the helicopter went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him. The waters rose higher and higher, and eventually they rose so high that the man on the roof was washed away, and alas, the poor man drowned. Upon arriving in heaven, the man marched straight over to God. "Heavenly Father," he said, "I had faith in you, I prayed to you to save me, and yet you did nothing. Why?" God gave him a puzzled look, and replied "I sent you two boats and a helicopter, what more did you expect?" Expecting God to come down from heaven to show us the way is never a good thing. I feel extremely sorry for her sha. If all else fails, then, at least she knows that she is going to heaven just like the man in the story. |
Romance / Re: I Need Advice: I Got Her Pregnant But I'm Married by IyaBasira: 11:38pm On Sep 29, 2010 |
Clap for yourself! |
Romance / Re: Seeking Your Ex And Wanting To Fix It All Over Again? (Mature Minds Only) by IyaBasira: 1:27pm On Sep 26, 2010 |
Opotuniti: 190 is a Nairaland transsexual. One day he's a guy, the next day he isn't. But he has a girlfriend so I'mm pretty sure he's a guy. |
Family / Re: Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace by IyaBasira: 4:29pm On Sep 23, 2010 |
tpiah: Seconded. The wrath poured upon Sodom and Gomorrah will be nothing compared to that of this generation. |
Family / Re: A Smart Woman Doesn’t Keep A Beautiful Maid –dr. Ola Balogun by IyaBasira: 1:04pm On Sep 21, 2010 |
Aloy+Emeka: I think your problem is that you fail to understand comments before jumping in to defend your kin. When did I change my standpoint? Isn't this what I said in the beginning? IyaBasira: Can you read it well now? So how did I change my standpoint? When you read something, you may be tempted to jump in and defend the other party, but my point was NOT "To hell with men's sexual urges or whatever". My point was that I was sick of that stupid excuse of "Men are weak". My point is that there is such a thing as self- control and men need to exercise it. You can be weak but is it everything that must incite you to cheat? Human beings are weak when it comes to temptation but you don't have to give in to it. That is my point and not that caricature you presented in your last post. I mean, seriously. He was saying that a man can see his househelp sleeping naked at night, and it sounded like "Oh well, even if the man cheats, he can because MEN ARE WEAK. " If the househelp is in her own room and sleeping naked, it's her choice! You have to make your own choice yourself and not let something like that affect you! Another problem with you is your is generalization. Not all women marry men because they believe they can change. Some women actually do marry because the man loves them and vice versa. And if they believe that all other factors are in place such as trust, respect, kindness etc then they decide to get married. You can blame the women all you want, and say that some women sleep with married men and all that. But you seem to have forgotten that some men also lie about their marital status. Some say they are not married when they are. |
Family / Re: A Smart Woman Doesn’t Keep A Beautiful Maid –dr. Ola Balogun by IyaBasira: 5:59pm On Sep 20, 2010 |
Aloy+Emeka: This isnt about male or female aggro. What woman would marry a man she didnt trust? I would not, and I don't think any woman would employ a housemaid if she knew her husband couldn't handle it. Seriously I think you are arguing out of context. The issue is that some man will sleep with a househelp regardless of whether she is ugly or beautiful. |
Family / Re: A Smart Woman Doesn’t Keep A Beautiful Maid –dr. Ola Balogun by IyaBasira: 5:37pm On Sep 20, 2010 |
Aloy+Emeka: EVERYBODY has the will power to resist temptation. Yes temptations are there but it is not mandatory to subscribe to it! Your analogy of comparing a crackhead to a married man is completely wrong. Cos a crackhead trying to resist drugs is completely starved of drugs so he can get rid of the addiction but a married man is not completely starved of sex. It's just that he can only have sex with one woman. And that's it. Isn't that the whole essence of getting married? What is the POINT of getting married if you know you cannot resist every Jane, Sylvia and Jumoke that comes along? If you know you cannot control your hunger, don't put yourself on a strict diet!! Simple! So I will get married and my husband will tell me he didn't have the WILLPOWER to resist! Save the hogwash for someone else. I'm tired of men saying that they are weak! Imagine that same man saying that a man can cheat on his wife 2 or 3 times but that doesn't mean he doesn't love her. I disagree with that completely cos it looks like you guys have watered down the definition of love to suit you and only you. Your egos demand that you have one steady girlfriend , but it also demands that you play around every once in a while , right? This was also why I said that a smart man would help the wife around the house so she would NEVER need a househelp. When men think they are above doing some things because it's a "woman's job". Thats when problems start cos she needs the extra help but you arent willing to provide it. What then is she meant to do? She has to look for it doesn't she? 1 Like |
Family / Re: A Smart Woman Doesn’t Keep A Beautiful Maid –dr. Ola Balogun by IyaBasira: 4:02pm On Sep 20, 2010 |
Aloy+Emeka: I am getting SICK of this daft excuse! Men are weak! So Bleep WHAT? God gave you eyes in front of your head so you can look, but you can also LOOK AWAY!!! You can use your brain to think about unholy things but you can also CHANGE your train of thought as well! I hate this idea that places all the responsibility on the women and expects them to deal with men's weaknesses themselves. Whatever a guy wants to do, he will do it whether the woman is ugly or beautiful. Some men will hump anything with two legs so the whole "don't hire a beautiful house help" is extremely dumb. A smart woman doesn't keep a beautiful housemaid, fine. Fair enough. But if the man was smart, he would help the wife so she doesn't need a househelp. Simple! 1 Like |
Family / Re: Her Hubby Changed by IyaBasira: 10:33am On Sep 18, 2010 |
^^How are you so sure of that? |
Family / Re: All The Married/single Ladies,I Hope You Commit lookery After Looking At This by IyaBasira: 9:29pm On Sep 17, 2010 |
Omotola is a hot babe mehn GAWD¬!!!!! Look at that figure . . . LORD, bless me toooo!!! chaircover: Oh My days . . . See insult. CHEI! As for all you hating on my love for Van V. (Chaircover and JennyKadry) . . . remember one thing . . . [img]http://3.bp..com/_1dVcNHSJwbs/TE722OKSacI/AAAAAAAAA80/TVX79v567xA/s320/van_vicker.jpg[/img] He is happily . . . ***breaks down in tears*** oh God I cant do this. Anyway am sure all of you are waiting for him to divorce his wife so you can pounce on him . . . you won't leave young men like him for people like myself shey? chaircover: I don die!!! LOL! |
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