Ringtone - Naeto C

NubianQ:

to be honest, i think he is just a waste of space, it took him forever to get married after destroying womens lives, long hisss,

Sammy Okposo Whose life did he destroy? I thought he was a Christian . . .

jennykadry:

Settle off in abuja i said , meaning get herself a transfer.

Distance especially for a short while shouldnt be a barrier, not when the other person is constantly visiting or keeping intouch. Him not bringing her or puting his manly plate like you said isnt even an excue, have you forgotten that this people have dated even b4 getting married and she's been in abuja half of the time before marriage? There is nothing like preventing un necessary evil, she was loose, she is a love-peddler and as far as i am concerned distance isnt the cause of it, for all we care this relationship might have been going on even before they got married

She def cant eat her cake and have it, what else did she want? how else did she want it that she couldnt teach her husband, how did she feel opening her legs for another man?

Goodness this man has no blame, if they have been married for 2 yrs or even a year, ehen then i will ask him why he allowed her stay so far away, but this is just a few months married life

Are you sure about that?
It seems to me that its when they were married 2 years that you can trust your wife completely and let her transfer to wherever in the world without being worried. But 2 months? I have always been told that the beginning of a marriage is very exciting but also very fragile, and its at this point that I would ask why you let her stay so far away. I think the first few months are extremely crucial.
Obviously I cannot blame the poster because an indisciplined person will always be an indisciplined person wherever he/she is. But as of yet , we don't know if she actually CHEATED on him. All I saw was that her head was on his lap. Maybe she was lying on the couch and her head was on his lap . . . .I think he might be overreacting a bit. Or maybe I don't fully understand the situation.

femmy2010:

da vinci code

Let's name and shame !!!!!

And then we could see who needs to be brought down a peg.

odiaero:

[size=24pt]hello @ Y'ALL  am th one who started this thread, and am not the person in question u can see am a guy, the link to the post is provided and plz let no Lesbian contact me again via my YIM and telling me they are interested in me , thanks[/size]

ROFL . . . .!!!!!!#


This thread is hilarious.


Jenny's problem is not that she is a lesbian. The reason why I say this is because in the UK or the US, she could sue for discrimination and actually win the case. Her problem was failing to realize that when in Rome, do as the Romans do.
She has lived in Nigeria for a long time and thus she should understand that Nigerians will always be the first to exact jungle justice - especially when it comes to homosexuality. Her boss is even considerate. Another person would have called her out in front of all her work colleagues. And THAT would have been much worse.

Travelista:

Girl, stop the madness and face the truth: you're a tramp. If you weren't, you wouldn't have thought of bedding her man. Why don't you move into your own place or find another roomie? I can't stand girls like you; so what, she called you as she saw it and now you want to bed her man. You're pitiful and you haven't changed from your old ways; you're jealous of your roommate, full. Stop. Jealous, jealous, jealous and I hope she beats your behind for what you've (probably) already down. Slut.

That doesn't make any sense. I'm sure when someone really annoyed you , you really wanted to shoot them with the biggest gun you could find. But did that make you a murderer? No.
The housemate didn't "call you as she saw it" like you said. She was just being an uncultured naughty woman by spreading it all over town. It's one thing to make a private assumption of someone based on what they told you themselves. It's another thing to tell others who don't even know her history. That wasn't right and neither was it fair , so how can you defend it?
Obviously what Lashontae wants to do is not the best , but isn't it better for you to just say, no don't do it. The way I see it, this thread is just a threat. I don't think she's that silly as to assume that stealing someone else's bf will solve all her problems.

randoman:

Jenny sorry to dissapoint you but I am not a nigerian.I am an oyibo but have been inNiferia for 3 years. I just want to know what to do in the mind of a Nigerian. We both live in the UK. I dont think like a Nigerian which is a bad thing as I admire the Nigerian race. The way your minds work and the inner strengh you possess so I just wanted help from you guys so I can decide what to do from a Nigerians point of view

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww! I feel so sorry for you!
But I hope you realize that this may not be the first lie she has told you. Being second best is not healthy. But you ARE going to have to be very harsh on her , especially if she continues to show no remorse.

jennykadry:

How old is she?

No nigerians dont talk like that, no way, listen ,I am a nigerian, precisely from abia state umuahia like your wife, and I tell you alot of nigerians dont talk like that, some are so shy to say to word "I love you" ,now you know why she is doing all these to you, cos you aint a nigerian, listen honey 99-9% of nigerian men wouldnt take that rubbish from her, infact she will be on her way to her father's house the minute he gets his proof.

It is an abomination from my side of the country(umuahia) to date a married man, that person is like a cursed person. gurls still date, but no woman should date another womans husband, it is not right

The lying part is the part i cant comprehend, that marriage is already built on lies, goodness, only God knows how many more lies she's told you and what else she hasnt told you.

what are your plans for her?

Do they even need proof to send their wives packing ? Mshewwww. But your post is on point you know. And besides, he needs to think very well because this could also mean that she never wanted him in the first place.

Man! I hate people like that! It was probably not a good idea to tell her your past in the first place . . . but all the same for her to say what she said is the most despicable thing a human being can do.

The whole reason why you are about to do what you want to do is because you don't like being called something you are not. But does it make any more sense to do what would genuinely make you one?

Everybody can do whatever they like in their lives, but you probably shouldn't do everything that comes into your head. Ignore that girl and hang out with other people who won't do the rubbish she gives herself license to do.

ElRazur:


I think you are just daft and misinformed.

Well, that's my belief.

WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pweety4me:

Menhhhh i don't even know wat 2 say. . .u know cause it's so easy 2 sit here & tell u about how u should 4give & 4get but fact still remains i am not d person in your shoes i didn't go through wat u did.

Maybe family members should be kept away from partners? i don't think u were so cautious wif your sis & your man i don't think u should have allowed dat afterall it's not his responsibility? :-\ all i can say now is dat u should soften your heart try & 4get all them painful memories as a christian u know dat u should 4give & 4get as hard as it may be so i think dat's wat u should work 2wards doing or u could end up bitter 4 d rest of your lyfe.

That bolded part makes no sense whatsoever. So she is at fault for trusting her bf with her sister? Excluding her mother, are those not the closest people to her? So how could she NOT trust them with one another?

The poster was not at fault in any way because its not as if her bf didn't know that that child was his. In fact, he knew and that was why he never refused to help when a situation arose. Besides, not allowing them to get close wouldn't have made the situation better, because the baby still came out in the end, and it still looked like the baby's daddy.

Missy B:

I'D like to connect this post with Your original post, by saying, someone can Love You and still cheat on You, hurt You or leave You. It boils down to what I talked about in the first part of ma former post on this thread - Actions and Motive.
I just Love to understand why people do certain things. It's not always about what they do, but also about Why - For me.

I think cheating is a weakness/flaw. Inability to handle responsibility or be satisfied and stick with what You have, Plus, lack of courage to leave a particular person [if You think You aren't coping] before bringing another person in.

If what You mean by ''help him'' is change him . . . .  Girlfriend, forget it.
No one can change anyone . . . .Change comes from within.

I have no intentions of doing such. Lol. Altering someone never works , i know.

Did you say it's been five years? Since you spoke to her?
It's probably time to move on, then.

Dont get me wrong. Its not possible for me to take this situation lightly because family members are as off-limits as you can possibly get.

When I say, move on, I don't mean sellotape a smile to your face and act like it's all rosy. I mean begin with the first step and pray about it.
As in, pray long and pray hard. Talk to God about it. Nowadays people equate moving on with either getting revenge or seeing the person who hurt you get knocked down by karma's bitchiness or living in a quagmire of self - pity where your life is lived in terms of "Oh, how I wish this person had never come into my life , my life has never been the same ".

I think what your sister did was the most terrible thing any sister can do ,  but would you be willing to imagine how she feels now? Sometimes we don't realize the implications of the things we do until we have done them and by then its faaaaaar too late to change anything. Just speak to her the next time she calls and really talk to her. Ask her all the questions you want to ask her. You will not forgive her immediately, but at least be willing to take that first step.

Missy B:

Trivially, I must say, I understand exactly what Your point is.
I've had personal reasons- which I cannot even begin to spew on a public forum- to ponder on this issue. My last decision was to, first, understand the difference between actions and motives. Since then, I've learnt to deal with the motive behind people's action and not the action itself. To be honest, it has helped me alot - anatha discussion.

Conditions/rules that should be kicked in the drain. Most times, it's people who haven't gotten into the room that try to deafen others with these 'rules'.
When it comes to ''Love'', there are no laid down rules. . . .In fact, I'm of the opinion that, there are no fixed rules to any action - either as to its incitation or  original intent. I'll exemplify, what I mean by that proposition  . . .
''Assuming there are 100 people on earth, and 70 have cried when hurt. 30 have never cried, therefore, they've never been hurt  . . . .In short, if You're hurt, You must cry''. False!!!

I'll exemplify again, this time, as to intent . . . .
''If you hurt someone, it's because you hate them . . . .  because it's not rational that You would hurt someone you care about.
John says Mary hurt him, therefore Mary hates John''.
Unless Mary verifies this conclusion, One can boldly say, it's false. For, Mary could have hurt John for his benefit [unknowingly to him] and not as a result of hate.


I concur!!!
I opine that, human is incapable to Love, as supposed. We can't even love ourselves perfectly. Also, There's nothing like true or fake love. Love is love . . . . It's either  love or not. Only God can love, and how he does that, I know not.
What man feels, and calls 'Love', I can't explain. Iice made a comment on a thread, that made me reflect. . . . . I quote


So much truth in this comment.
You're on point.

***Sighs with relief***     

Thanks very much. I'm actually asking this question because there was someone I used to like and was going out with. I really looked up to him and respected him, so when the news got out that he liked someone else, things started going downhill. After a while he started trying, but I'm one of those people who doesnt forgive easily , so even though he started trying really hard eventually, I was still too much of a believer in Disney fairy tales (lol) to accept that he WAS willing to change and make an effort.

Normally I wouldnt even care, but I heard through the grapevine that he's just cheated on his present girlfriend. I feel a bit sad, because I think he's lost and needs help and I was once in that position to help him but I didnt.  And once this news gets out, its going to be a whole vicious cycle all over again.

Acidosis:

A man is said to be in love when he can ignore the needs of his mother, father, siblings & friends just to meet that of a girl. Any other expression less than this is 'lust'

That isnt what my question is about and someone in 'lust' can ignore the needs of other important family members, to meet that of the needs of a girl.

Hi!

Ok, I just want to ask a question that's been confusing me for a long time. There are often these conditions which are attached to true love, what it should do and what it should'nt do. The way I see it , the only type of perfect love is that which God loves us with. But there's one problem. God is . . . God. And we are just puny humans who mess up in the most terrible ways a lot of the time.

So when you hear ;

" If a guy/girl loves you, he will wait for you "
Or
"If a guy/girl loves you, he will never cheat on you"
Or
"If a guy/ girl loves you, he will never do something to hurt you intentionally"

Some people are brought up in violent environments and thus, their idea of love is twisted and their way of expressing it is just not what a "normal" person is used to. But that does't mean they aren't in love, does it?
What if someone is excessively selfish and they just are not used to the idea of looking after anyone's interests but theirs due to their background? Falling in love wont CHANGE their character's automatically, will it? If anything it makes them more selfish because they may want to play the field and keep the one they want waiting in the wings but intentionally hurting them in the process.

I just wonder a lot of the time because if someone was in that type of relationship, the general consensus would be "Get rid of him/ her! " or " Kick him to the curb! " as I hear a lot of people say on this forum. So when exactly does it end? I hope I've made sense but I'm just really confused about this because it seems as though everyone has their own definition of love these days.

guzair:

Thanks Guys i told my Friend yesterday ( i actually showed him all the call logs and messages ), GUESS WHAT he said he KNOWS that his been monitoring her outgoing call and that he tot we had actually started grooving again behind him. I know he is hurt but i can do little to comfort.

Another development is that my girlfriend saw some of her text and all hell is let loose, she dosnt believe and says she is going to comfront her .

Eyaaah . . .
Thats so sad. And he said he knew all along? By telling him you may just have saved your own life. Who knows?
Please comfort him as much as you can.

Big-Man:

Another typical western woman that wants to reverse the law of marriage ( Husbands to submit to their wives while wives should love their husbands). When will these people stop challenging Divine creations

When will these people learn

But she's only asking . . . If she's not Nigerian she may not be familiar with the culture at all. I have often heard it said that "The stranger who asks questions will never lose his way". Obviously she's going to be resistant to it because she doesn't like it very much and people are always resistant to something that is foreign to them.

Faher:

^^^ It means I don't believe you

*** Oh My God . . . I must have run out of that potion that the babalawo gave me so that no-one disbelieves whatever comes out of my mouth . . . I am DOOMED!***


(Back to reality)

But why? Why dont you believe me?

The girl in the backless outfit tried now! Haba! Her back was spotless!!!!

Would people prefer it if she wore the dress and we could all see the innumerable black spots on her back?!

The dress was just faaaaar too short for my liking. Thats all I could see that was wrong with it.

Faher:

Lmao, you almost convinced me. 

How did I 'almost' convince you?

Sweet is nice in a person's character but is often masked because it screams vulnerablility.

The sweetest ones are sometimes those who look the hardest on the outside. However I think that for most people, after having met someone they like,  try to make it easier for the other person to get to know them and not do things on purpose just to push them away. I heard some people do that though but it doesnt make sense to me anyway.

segzi cres:

when ladies say a guy is sweet then just know that he's a dummy.

That isn't true.

Is it that difficult for you to figure out what you have to do?

Ignore her like a plague for the rest of your life. And tell your fiancee about her if she ever shows up in your life again.

Assuming that this story is true anyways.

She made a whole lotta sense. Kudos to her!

BlakkBoi:

Make we hear word for these una virgin nonsense. Dem dey take am go heaven?. Mcheeew

Please don't get it twisted. This topic is not meant to make anyone feel bad or to anger anyone. I just think that a few people are doing things for shallow reasons. The purpose of this is to educate and not to judge anyone.

This is a moral dilemma to which the only answer is YES.

There is a way of doing things in which you can force your cousin to reveal the truth without getting your hands dirty.

Step 1; Call your cousin, talk to him and let him know that you know what he is up to. Let him know that the fact that this woman is your friend is the reason why you will not ignore it and hope it goes away. Give him a time limit of a week or two to tell his wife. And let him  understand that you will not waste any time in telling his wife if he has not told her within that time frame.

Step 2; Cut off all contact with him for that week or two and let him stew knowing that you know. (If he is the hardened type he may not care but lets hope that is not the case). After this period of time has passed, ask him if he told his wife. If he has , then lucky you. If he has not, proceed to Step 3.

Step 3; If he has not told his wife, then you will just have to keep to your promise and tell her yourself. Its not a nice thing to do but it hs to be done
if you feel that great of a responsibility towards her as a friend.

I saw this article written by an amazing bloggist and I hope it goes a little way to reducing the mistaken idea that men somehow respect you more for being a virgin .


http://sugabelly..com/2009/02/of-virgins-and-virginity.html

pro01:

Gba bé (again) for the bolded part.

All the hyprocritical gurls here are saying poo like:
@poster, if you believe that poo, then you should be tied to a stake and shot! Imagine this: with your hard-come-by N1k, you buy a fancy card for her like someone advised, and then, on bended knees, declare your undying love for her (awww, how romantic!). Meanwhile another guy - a so-called 'toaster' or 'male friend' (thats what she'll say if you ask her) who works in xyz bank/oil-serving firm or is a prosperous yahoo boy buys her a pink Blackberry Storm as 'token' gift, and drops by to drop a nice big vanila cake and N50k for her to celebrate with her friends. Pray: what do you think will be going through her mind? What would her friends be telling her? Is the guy a father christmas that only gives without expecting anything in return? I laugh in efik! Lol.

If your jazz is very strong, she probably wouldn't dump you just yet (out of sheer pity), but she'll SURE AS HELL give the other 'nicer' dude(s) more than a piece of the sweaty action. Thats the harsh reality of life, forget what those funny girls say.

Word of advice: enjoy the relationship (or the free kitty) while it lasts, but do not, I repeat, DO NOT put your heart in it or take it seriously. . .concentrate instead on finding a job, or making money by any means necessary. Otherwise you'd be squashed like a fly on a wall.

"Got 99 problems but a b***h ain't one" - Jay Z.

Not all girls are like that. Any girl who does stuff like that is just not worth even 1/ 1000000 th of the effort.
But on the other hand, some girls I know do lend their bf's money and even pay for their phone contracts and stuff. And this doesn't seem to stop their boyfriends from cheating on them.

Insecurities often lead to selfishness in some aspects of life , so I'd say it's both. I never really thought of marriage to that extent. Previously, when I was thinking of my wedding all I could imagine was all my best friends and how bad I would feel if they couldn't be my bridesmaids or be at my wedding.

msb247:

T.Y BELLO SHOULD GO PLEAASSSSSEEEEEEEE!!!!
ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH

ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Ty Bello ? How dare you
This means that someone will soon mention Lara George's name. But by that time I will be armed with rat poison.