₦airaland Forum

Toks2008:
I undrstand your point but it still does not change the narrative that REAL MEN see no big deal in marrying a single mum. That does not mean men don't have a choice to make.

Replace "real" with "some". Your statement should read: ...Some men see no big deal marrying a single mum... The fact that a man doesn't want to marry a single mum doesn't mean he isn't a real man, and the fact that another man chooses to marry a single mum doesn't make him a real man. They both have different standards of the type of partner that they can each settle down with. So stop calling a man real because he choosed to go for someone that meets his standard...

#EndSars might have ended badly, but it will never be forgotten. The only period in the history of Nigeria where the youth shun ethnicity, religion, political affiliations, educational and economic statuses and came together, spoke with one voice and fought for just one cause with all gusto and temerity. It's a beacon of hope that one day we're gonna come together again, face our oppressors (evil politicians ) and send them and their children to exile so we can make Nigeria what it should be. That day is coming!

Igbos are their own enemy. They can never be united and speak with one voice. Give them a little money or opportunity and they'll start turning against themselves. Biafra is a pipe dream!

fortune1968:
una see how people dey reason ? That's why many crazy people wouldn't mind using their own mother for money ritual .

It's really very sad! When job and money are the major things that some peopl are using to define themselves then we're truly in a crazy time.

Rubbiish:
Not only wife!
Nobody will respect u if u lose your source of income.

You're in a fake and wrong company if the only reason they respect and treat you right is because you have money. There's much more to a person than money.

MightySparrow:
Your job defines you: no job, you cease to exist.

This is a complete misyarn...so it's your job that defines you as an individual? Wow! We're really in a crazy time!

Tokskob2008:
Keeping it till marriage is good but displaying it for everyone to see on social media like this couples did is plain stupidity. Some things are best kept private.

That's what happens when something that used to be a normal occurrence suddenly becomes very rare. You can't blame them!

Modernizer:
I won't bore you all with a long write up.

I'm ready to settle down, actually I needed to settle down like yesterday. Problem is, I don't make friends easily and hooking up is even tougher. I don't trust easily.

So I'm talking with this girl that checks all my boxes ( quite a rare feat for my high expectations), but for one thing...she is evidently a choleric. I know because I'm one myself.

The hot temper, impetuousness, some bossy-ness, independent mindedness, low empathy, high ambition...all those tell tale choleric features give it away.

Now I know cholerics are advised to get their opposites say phlegmatic for relationship purposes, but I want to ask the house: can I a hot tempered man cope with a hot tempered woman?
Any people with experience on this here?
Can both of us with low empathy really be compatible?

The adverse statistics coming out of marriage these days scares the sh..t out of me. I don't want any of it.

Should I drop this girl? Or can it work?

Sorry oo...it may sound small but that's my own challenge.

Cc newbornmacho, Ahnie, kestolove

Since you're also choleric the simple question you should ask yourself is: can you live with yourself and be happy? / Can a marriage with yourself workout? If you can answer this question sincerely you'll know what to do.

Modernizer:
I won't bore you all with a long write up.

I'm ready to settle down, actually I needed to settle down like yesterday. Problem is, I don't make friends easily and hooking up is even tougher. I don't trust easily.

So I'm talking with this girl that checks all my boxes ( quite a rare feat for my high expectations), but for one thing...she is evidently a choleric. I know because I'm one myself.

The hot temper, impetuousness, some bossy-ness, independent mindedness, low empathy, high ambition...all those tell tale choleric features give it away.

Now I know cholerics are advised to get their opposites say phlegmatic for relationship purposes, but I want to ask the house: can I a hot tempered man cope with a hot tempered woman?
Any people with experience on this here?
Can both of us with low empathy really be compatible?

The adverse statistics coming out of marriage these days scares the sh..t out of me. I don't want any of it.

Should I drop this girl? Or can it work?

Sorry oo...it may sound small but that's my own challenge.

Cc newbornmacho, Ahnie, kestolove

Two controlling people in same environment for a long time will always be at loggerhead

The whites are so used to having everything available when they need them that just a little shortage of any of their daily necessities would through them in panick mode like the world is about to end. Mehn, wicked governments all over African has taught Africans to embrace suffering as a normal way of life. What a world we're living in!

OfficialGaGa:
Make something like dis happen for NORTH...


I wan see something first

Don't wish evil for your fellow brother. Regardless of what's happening in the north, we're one country and we shouldn't be wishing evil for one another.

Thank God for Africa. God knows our leaders are heartless and extremely wicked that's why he put us in place where natural disasters are rare occurrences. We're really very lucky!

OkuFaba:
Fear that gender...

They'll say money is not everything but just go broke for one seconds and see how they'll fall back.

The man will surely bounce back, and i hope he has learnt his lessons.

That girl deserves to be punished.
I BELIEVE IN AN EYE FOR AN EYE

It's not the girl's fault. That's what happens when you try to impress a leech with money. If you check every well you would discover that the guy wasn't giving his mum or sisters monthly allowance, let alone weekly allowance. If the story is true then the guy is a compound fool.
When you entice a broke woman with money she goes to the next customer when she can't suck from you any more

Sonnobax15:

Good for him...

E go surprise you say this kind guyman na the type wey go loseguard him fellow guyman because of Small assistance....

Imagine am na,if you give your guy wey dey come warri from Lagos just 2k,he go value am forever..But if na Woman you do that favor to,she no go value am via say she go reason am say you do am for her because of lashing..

Well,my ultimum pity goes to every guyman wey think say he go fit buy woman loyalty with him money.... Because las las when the source of the money go stop,na then you go know say money no go fit buy Woman loyalty

As for una wey be women,I still dey pity those of una wey they leave men wey dey spend for una Simply because say he lost him job . No be so e suppose be na....you suppose be the better half of the guyman both in the times of highs and lows..

I've discovered that most men hardly forget good/help/assistance given to them I their time of needs no matter how little that assistance may be. Most women consider whatever you do for them as their right and as such they hardly remember it.
Just imagine if this guy has been saving those 10k/20k he has been wasting on a leech, it would have been of great help to him during his low moments. Sense is really very far from some guys. Any money spent on a woman, mostly one that isn't your wife is a very bad investment because it has no returns.

michlins:
I think feminism is all having a level playing field for all gender. The idea of giving someone an advantage goes against everything it stands for.

Those seats aren't earned

Women can't really compete so they hide under the umbrella of feminism to armtwist men to give them what most of them don't truly deserve. Men fight and work hard for what they want, while women play the victim and lament so as to trick me to giving them what they want. It's how they operate all over the world and the will later start shouting "girl power", "strong woman", etc. When in the real sense they're just pathetic manipulators.

Where is the gender equality that women have been fighting for if they keep giving women slots? Everybody should be given a levelled playing field to fight for what they want, but women are not ready to do that because they know they can't truly compete, and they will be shouting gender equality up and down. This is an example of gender inequality because if the gender are equal then it would be all man to himself and the best person taking the price. Just saying!

YoungLionken:
Some of these LITTLE THINGS are underrated..

Abboniki works for both waist and muscle, feverish conditions and miraculously cures body odour..

We tend to rely on the wisdom/knowledge of the Westerners more than ours here..

I was surprised at the cheap, traditional and effective remedy for stomach ulcer. This is something one would pay exorbitantly for in hospital..

And again, we Africans have failed to upgrade whatever we learnt from our forefathers...

Can you please share the traditional remedy for stomach ulcer?

passionguy:
My brother is 24 years old. His entire life has been spent fucking up. The thing is he lies, cheats, gamble and steals. He has succeeded in selling almost everything in the house be it fridge, stab, pressing iron, electronic and manymore
Now he has extended it by going out to steal from neighbors and people.
He as been arrested so many times and been bailed. Now everyone in the family is tired of him mostly my mum she can't eat good food because of him because his becoming worse.
Pls Advice me on what to do.

You can never change anyone that hasn't seen the need for change. Infact, the more you try to make them change, the more they would resent you and do those things you advise them against doing. Look, your 24yr old brother is already an adult and if at 24 he can't advise himself and decide what he really wants to do with his life, there's nothing you or anyone else can do to help him.

One more thing, you guys should stop bailing him out from the consequences of his misbehaviour. The sooner you guys start allowing him to suffer squarely the consequences of his bad behaviour, the better for all of you. He's already given your family a bad name, so allowing him suffer for his wrong doing won't make any difference to the bad name he's already given you guys.

Fahdiga:
Why can't Muslim countries like the UAE and others help their fellow Muslims. Why must it always be Christian countries that will be helping this terrorists anytime they are in a mess, a mess they created by themselves. Political correctness in the hands of Muslims will destroy the west soon.

Muslim countries are scared of their fellow Muslims from other countries. Aside that, this is a means for them to spread to other nations and start clamouring for the same sharia they're running away from.
UK and the U.S should evacuate only women and children, they should leave the men because they are the trouble makers.

lonelyisland:
You know, at a time she couldn't stay any longer.
The pressure was much, she was loosing her mind.
We said it was us against the world, but she couldn't fight the world again.
Families were disturbing her for money, money was no where to be found.
What she doesn't know was her courage was what was pushing me forward, it was just what I needed to forge ahead.

At a time, I too was loosing it but she came with a strong vibes and aura which kept me moving.
She left, but her courage and strength is still there.

My advice to young guys please have money before you venture into a relationship, she might stay but you still need the money to keep it going.

Relationships/marriage are like old cargo trains that uses charcoal to function. You have to be ready to give in something. I don talk my own finish ooo

Why is it that whenever you guys talk about relationship, you always advise the man to have money? So the woman should come with empty hands en?
Guys, hustle to make money not because you want to spend it on any woman, but because you want to give yourself comfort. All this have money talk before going into a relationship is getting too much and kinda boring. Have money because you want to give yourself a great life - not because you want to spend it on a leech.

What I'm finding hard to understand about this Taliban takeover issue is: are the people running away from the Taliban non-Muslims? If they are Muslims, then why are they running away? Is sharia that the Taliban are saying that they would impose in the country not same thing that Muslims enjoying the freedom of developed countries like UK, USA, Canada, etc, are clamouring to be allowed to practice in those nations?

You're in your home where the tool to help you practice your religion fully has taken over and you're running, where are you running to? These same people will now go to another man's country and start clamouring for same sharia they running from now. What an irony!

N-power seems like APC election strategy. Just like they tricked the batch A and B with continuity so as to use them for their second term election bid which they've gotten, that's how they're going to trick this batch C and A and B with exit package so as to support them in 2023. Batch C is being planned so that their exit would fall in the 2023 election period and they will promise them continuity so as to get their support and use them as both offline and online campaign warriors like they did to batch A and B, but e go clear for their eyes las las when dem go realize say all na scam. Just saying!

daniel56:
Stop disturbing m with dis or I will report you, I don't like dis

That is one of the most trustworthy exchangers here that you''re threatening to report for whatever reason best known to you. She'll give you one of the best rates here and her transaction time is very fast. Look, if you have payoneer funds to exchange she's the best here for now; unless she changes in the future..., but for now, cokebar is the best payoneer exchanger you can find around here. Just saying!

CzarChris:
From the name elohor, it's clear that you are an urhobo.

I stay and work in Warri. When did Urhobo people marriage list come pass Igbo people own?

When I get an honest answer from you, then we can proceed. I smell lies here.

The tribe she identifies with makes the story fake. The urhobos have one of the cheapest marriage list in Nigeria. They will tell you categorically that they don't sell their daughters. The OP edited an old story but she identified with the tribe that has never been known for expensive bride prize which makes the story very fake. Some people wey read d story go dey ask which part of urhobo dem dey give list of up to 500k? It's really funny

Nigeria is a scam country: they always put the cart before the horse. I thought they said increase in electricity tariff would lead to increase in power delivery? Mehn, dem don too scam us for this country o! This is one of the countries where the price of a service is increased with a promise of improved service delivery but the situation always gets worse and there's nothing we the masses can do about it.

Nothing somebody can say "as a Nigerian this is what I am enjoying; absolutely nothing." The government and everyone that has the chance keeps robbing us and it seems there's nothing we can do. If we don't come together and fight for a better country nothing will ever improve in this nation because everyone out there that gets a little opportunity to be in position is out to exploit the average Nigerian. We gotta come out and speak out because everything in this nation has gotten out of hand!

LandMann:
I can do that for you... Just message me and I'll explain the process

Okay, I'm going to message you now

I have $409 payoneer USD I want to exchange for usdt, who can do that for me? If you can exchange my $409 payoneer USD for usdt quote this message and let me know your terms. But we're going to use an escrow so as to avoid unnecessary stories.

3coins:
He beat wilder is the last two fights? I am sure you didn’t watch the first

Seriously. ..most of the people saying fury beat wilder in the first fight didn't watch it. Wilder completely outclassed fury in that fight. To be sincere, wilder won that fight - I was shocked when they scored it as draw.
The second fight was what I didn't understand. The same wilder that was very confident and always on the attack in the first fight was now looking very scared to throw a punch all through the time the second fight lasted. Maybe God just wanted to humble him because he really got so loud before that fight

KosiGee:
Deontay Wilder can’t beat Fury. Why is he working so hard to get himself injured? Fury bested him in their two previous fights.
He should stop being a clog in the wheel of progress.

Fury vs Joshua is the fight we want to see. Either can use Deontay as a sparring partner.

I don't think you watched the first fight between the two. Wilder bested fury in the first fight, I believe it was the over confidence that made him train less which resulted to fury outclassing him in their second clash.
A third clash between the two will be a very hard one for fury: you know why? It's simply because a man that's already on the ground has got nothing to lose, but he would certainly want to prove a point.

Fedric:
I noticed that my girl friend doesn't like to come over anymore. Of late she Dosen't pick my calls often, she picked after 20 times .

I called her plenty times yesterday but she didn't pick my call giving me silly excuses that she left her phone at home while going out.

She repeated the same thing today and her excuse was that she went to an office and she can't pick the call. She later say she have to submit the phone to the security officers at the gate and that's the law of the institute .

I never see this kind of excuses and when I talk to my sister, she was like she might have gone to a man house and don't wanna pick .

The main issue with her is she believes I complain too much and she also raises voice at me any time I told her an issue I don't like.

I'm seriously tired and I am having different thoughts .

I wanted to marry her but her attitude keeps preventing me from making such move.

I feel bad right now and I needed an advice .

I feel so bad that my thought right now is to pretend, use her, dump her and make her feel regretful of making me go through emotional pain.

Should I just let her go and I should go on my who way?

Or should I just free her and start doing as if she don't exist in my life again .

I'm not happy right now and I feel so bad .


Advice please.

Make una dey forget all this una funny talk of "I wanted to marry her..." person wey no want or send you naim you wan 'wanted to marry'! Funny guys really plenty for this nairaland o. So you need soothsayer to tell you say d babe no send you again en? Some guys go just dey fall their hand for small small girls! Imagine someone calling a girl up to 20times in one day! O boy, people dey o! Ur mata don pass advice o... na maturity and self-respect you need

blazepascal:
When it comes to relationships or picking a partner for marriage, most Nigerians have a long list of preferences and what they want their spouses to possess in order to make a perfect partner.

Men have want their women to be respectful, beautiful, caring, bold and hard-working before they can consider them as "wife materials". This ideology often make some men to be too selective and usually end up being single even in their forties.

What about the women? Nigerian girls are very complicated people and their idea of an "ideal" husband might depend on age.

A teenage girl or one in her early twenties would want a fun guy, the party type that would take her places to have fun on weekends. Any guy that behaves like a husband to a girl of these age bracket will surely be disappointed as her lifestyle and mentality might be too over-whelming for him. These kinds of ladies prefer play boys and fun lovers at the moment.

Since we're talking about ladies who are choosing the kind of men they want to spend the rest of their lives with, let's get down to the point.

What do ladies mean when they say they want a "God-fearing" man?

First let's describe who a God-fearing man is. A person who is God-fearing is an overly religious person who sees nothing more important than his relationship with God. These people are try to live as holy as they can and often times, treats all people with love and respect equally. These kind of people don't lay much emphasis on romance or being a "great husband" and treat their spouses equally with the way they treat other people outside.

Now, with the above description is there any Nigerian woman that would want that kind of man? Many would cringe at the mere idea of marrying a pastor so as not to appear wearing gowns that they wouldn't normally wear.

No Nigerian woman would want to share her husband's love and affection with anyone and clearly, intimacy is a vital ingredient in marriage that must be shown as often as possible so as to keep the bond strong.

Some Nigerian women would likely cheat or even loath on her "God-fearing" husband because well, that isn't what she had hoped for.

So in summary, what people actually mean when they tell you that they want a "God-fearing man" is actually "I want a Good man''.

"I don't want someone who's too religious".

So the question is, why do we say one thing and mean another?.

Your description of a god-fearing man is very shallow. The fact that a man loves God doesn't mean that he's not romantic or he's got no game. We get many levels brothers in my church with styles and class that actually love God. The fact say person love God and chooses to live for God no mean say d person no sabi catch fun or do shits because your definition of fun and mine no fit be the same but that one no mean say you dey get more grove than me. Just saying!

Kelvin3476:
U said sumtin gr8 bt the part u talkd abt respecting all ur wish like a zombie isn't part of the submission i am talkn abt.

That's some men's definition of submission - control. They want to control the woman and expect her to always do as they say. The moment the woman have any different opinion from theirs or object to any of their orders, you'll hear them saying that she's not submissive. Submission no mean say she no go get voice or say for the family Mata, is all about how she treats you and makes you feel.

Kelvin3476:
U ARE VERY CORRECT , BUT HOW CAN A BROKE MAN EARN SUBMISSION FROM A RICH WIFE ?

Submission is not earned, submission is given. A woman that truly loves you would have less difficulty submitting to you. Also, both men and women submit to each other. As a man, any time you respond to your wife's need, listen to her concerns and put her first, you're indirectly submitting to her at those instances and vice versa. Submission has nothing to do with your woman obeying all your others like a zombie without her having any say, it's more about how you both treat each other, relate with each other and respond to each other's needs and concerns. So if she loves you, submission would come naturally to her irrespective of whether she earns more or less.