₦airaland Forum

"Hard earned money" I hear some people say.How unfortunate majority of us Nigerians show less regard for the essence of spending.I don't think any typical Nigerian (rich or otherwise) can ever ever run out of important issues to solve with their wealth.
For those having weddings and other celebrations ,are you saying you're not quite up to it so much you have to scramble for what is sprayed on you?

Nothing is wrong with you,the situation is more about timing.I'm sure if you met this other woman before your wife you would have definately chosen to marry her.On the flip side the love you have for this other woman doesn't look like it will ever go away so get used to not seeing her unless of course you're ready to jeopardise the happiness of your child and wife.
Its a case of not being in love but love the person you're with.At 28,I'll say you have a long way ahead so I suggest you bury that emotion and live with your decision.It hurts but hey thats life.

Its very difficult to deduce the reason for your sister's action but I can say you have a good heart.Sorry to be too nosey but if your mum died at the age of 39 and you already have a business of your own (assuming you're in your mid twenties) you have been really blessed and elevated.Is it your friend's desire to go abroad to further his studies? If yes then you can do your bit to assist him bearing in mind the limit to which you can help.Warning!! Consider yourself and your fiancé as your best friend.I understand how this friend can be but speaking out of context,perhaps make him a ver close friend.Your friend I will consider a greater potential than your sister in many ways you are aware of,your sister on the other hand doesn't sound positive about going abroad hence she's happy with her life.As the elder you won't cease to be more abound in knowledge keep looking out and after your sister until she refuses or reacts negatively to your favours.
In my opinion assisting your friend going abroad could turn out well for you but your sister? Let her be and provide as decent as you can for her.Also speak to her and share her world.It is no joke for young women in Nigeria especially without one of the parents and no sibling.She can turn turn a new leaf faster than acid burns.
As for that cock-up of Uncle's in-law.Uncle is a man and can obviously handle his business.I won't blink if I were you.All you have is your sister,this friend and your partner.

There's nothing new under the sun,do your thing.

I believe those who put up pictures have convincing reasons to do so.These websites are refered to as social and networking sites hence they are meant for pure social interaction.Furthermore it's a lot easier using this medium to keep in touch and stay updated with familes & friends,however a good amount of people's intent is for the world to see how well they are doing.
The human instincts reacts impulsively out of trust and goodwill therefore will not reason otherwise why a fellow human would want to betray or violate this rule of thought.

@ Adeboo,I've actually read some of your comments but, this? C'mon woman this is 2008.Get on with the times my dear.

adeboo:
Oga o is 'na wa o' and oloshi jati jati - i honestly don't know its probably along the mad person line sha.


The thing is that even most people put the pictures of their weddings, christenings on the sites - i would never be that brave because u just don't know what people can do.
Especially when people have handsome or pretty wives, i see them flaunting their partners on the sites, i think to maself 'what the heck are they on'?

Oh I just read that juicy part of your last post.Honestly thats very correct,I'm one of those kind of people.What we are on about? 1 of a million reasons: To show those who thought very little about you,you got it better than them.

@ Shapey,Amsky and all that took part in this great experience.I want to say thank you for sharing.This has kept me both entertained and educated me for a good week.There's nothing more to be said on this thread,unless you want to let the whole nairaland in on your everyday life as a married woman.
Nairaland is just too HOT!!

As much as it's true that alcoholism could be destructive,some cases are opposed to that fact.What if both couples are alcoholic? Well in my opinion it all depends on the personality of the abuser.I would say alcohol is as much of a danger to a marriage as dishonesty,promiscuity or even common attention.On a scale of 0-10 though it's I'd say 3.

mad joke.Well funny.

Bolaji wats with you?Long time.

********Is Patiently awaiting the expected but won't be hiding for long

Can't really comprehend this.You're either single at one time or not at the other.Except for those that are single unintentionally.I also think its normal to take some time before getting into another relationship which automatically makes you single.I believe the feeling is very similar it depends on how healthy your heart is.

I haven't been approached by these self-imposing big boys but I'll sure pass.I'm a one man army.Thx though.

St. Peter came to the Lord and said, "Lord, I have to talk to you. I have a problem. I know we didn't have many Jamaicans in heaven so you instituted an affirmative action plan and we are supposed to have 10,000 Jamaicans in heaven. But they are causing so many problems!

They have torn down the Pearly Gates by swinging on them. They have let in another 10,000 of their bredrin through the fence. They are constantly standing by the gate disturbing Angel Gabriel begging for "bly" for their cousin, sistren, neighbour, granny, auntie , Whenever it is their turn to watch the gates they keep letting in good looking women and fat women.

They have stolen my harp. They have gotten jerk sauce all over their white robes. Drum pan chicken is being sold all over the Streets of Gold. Some are walking around with only one wing because they are "styling".

Angels must have two wings to fly! Some of them have put chrome wings and are dazzling the other angels when they are flying. The white robes are eternal and must be washed five times a day. Some haven't washed their robes since they arrived because they didn't come to heaven do "day's work". Some have refused to take their turn in helping keep the Stairway to Heaven clean because "dem ah no helper".

Many who came here because they used salt are still using it because they don't like "ital" food. Some refuse to wear their halos because they don't fit right overt heir hairstyles. Others are wearing their halos backways. Others are wearing their halos with the tags still attached to them. Others have discarded the white halos and are wearing gold ones instead they claim these are "bashy" Most of the women have discarded their white robes and are wearing white shorts and "batty riders" claiming that they have pretty skin and want: to show off their "bandy legs"

Reggae music is blasted at all hours of night at their "bashments", disturbing all the other residents. Their cellular phones are worn on their robes and keep ringing during prayers. Recently there was an altercation between Adam and one Jamaican who claims he was only "checking" Eve. They have planted marijuana in the Garden of Eden since the soil is so fertile claiming "man and man haffi hustle".

What should I do?!" The Lord said, "It wouldn't be fair to not let Jamaicans in heaven. They have just as much right to be here as other nationalities. Maybe we just don't know how to deal with them; maybe we are using the wrong approach. We need to check with someone who has more experience dealing with them. Let's call the Devil.

The Devil answered the phone and said, "Hello, Lord. What can I do for you?" The Lord said, "We have a problem up here, and we'd like to talk to you about it." The Devil said, "Just a minute, I've got to put you on hold." The Devil was gone five minutes. He came back to the phone and said, "OK Lord, I'm back. What's up?" The Lord said, "Well, I would like to talk to you about a problem up here." Once again the Devil excused himself and put the Lord on hold. This time he was gone for fifteen minutes. Finally, the Devil came back to the phone and said, "Lord, I am really sorry, but I can't talk to you right now. Have to go. These damm Jamaicans down here , yesterday they just had air conditioning put in. Now they have just put out the hell's fire! saying "man come to hell to "cool out"!

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and

neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,

the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"

"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

@ Ayodeji Asiru-Balogun.I went to Toria on Unilag road. 82-84.Could we have been friends? I think not,anyway it's good to meet someone from back then.

@ Bunmi.I think I know Bisi Ojumu,she's also know as Alaba right? If so I used to visit her neighbour back in the 90s and I think her parents still live there.I can get you someone who has her contact.

This dude cracked me up everytime I read his post.I have nothing against you,I just feel it's not ideal to toy with people's feelings.However I enjoy your eccentricity and desperate seek for attention.

It depends on what's been asked.Some threads are created for discussion while others are just posted to voice one's opinion about an issue.Its no big deal if no one replies your post,although it might hurt it doesn't make you a fool.Because the world revolves,you might not be in the best place at the best time.Get it?

Okrika is the highest.I remember selling my own used clothes in Yaba back in the days,it was unbelievable but I got as much as 2k5 for some shirts.Think how much the ibo boy would sell it for.
Can't wait to get a Ferragamo suit, of course second hand!!

Mustay:
how many of beck's former clothes has your pal brought

That was just a figure of speech,it wasn't meat literarily.What I was saying is,people still get good quality goods from second hand stores.There ain't nothing wrong with them.

It depends where the second hand clothes come from.I know of someone who I consider a "dress to kill" kind of guy and he shops at second hand stores.Beckham's clothes doesn't end up in the bin you know! Which means of course I can still shop at second hand stores.No lie.But never in 9'ja.

Thank you all for your support and cooperation in helping me do my job diligently and also acquring this much valuable knowledge and experience in this company.Ofcourse I won't be where I am without the relentless assistance of (mention a few names).I consider myself fortunate to have been a member of this organization as much I hate to leave I'm sure you all understand my reason for leaving, , to be continued when I come back to work.happy New Year

Trust me,your Armani suit will already speak for itself.Take the label off otherwise max the attention by leaving the price tag on.Quality & Luxurious garments always make a bold statement.To those who recognize sha!!

Perhaps you need to take another look and asses your partners/employees.Alternatively, review your area of investment and work out why you are in it in the first place.Business sometimes goes with your level of interest so ask yourself if you like what you do.

You lot just capped my day @ work with great humor.@D denony.You crack me up madly.

Listen.That took me way back.I actually felt like I was in those times.Didn't get to read most of it though.Thanks for the historical flash.

@ poster.
In my opinion I think the tale is made up and if truly you had a fling with your brother-in-law then either your husband doesn't care about you or your brother-in law despises his brother or they are not even brothers at all.Something tells me with the manner at which your concocted narration goes, it's just a means to seek opinion to an event which is about to happen, infact I can't even think of it happening the way you said it.It sounds too mischievious.

@ Others (Preaching prayer)
How is this person supposed to pray? With which mouth nah? Please! This person is just as human as everyone in here perhaps she should have posted this on the "Diary of secrets" forum.We all have em.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-86286.32.html

Enough said.You laid it down explicitly.

@ Obalende.
One can't totally agree with your perception of living in the UK.To start with the population of those who made it to the UK through the course of studying can't be compared to those who arrived in order to carve a niche or secure a means of survival and livelihood.Going by that alone,you know very well Nigerians will stick it through whatever pains or treatment they get because majority of them have little or no options.

You are correct there is always some form of migrant degradation in the media and even in the society but I think that is the norm in most parts of the world.Its more like killing the spirit of immigrants by ensuring there lives are made more miserable by the minute.That is a human factor,when a man's territory is continually being populated by aliens he is bound to feel threatened and most likely react by enforcing limits and restrictions.I'm sure you are aware this applies to even the eastern europeans and people from developing countries.But guess what? Nigerians will endure the pain and maltreatment rather than go back to someplace they are worse off.It all depends on where you're coming from.

With regards to the inablity to create a social network outside your own kind,yes there is not much room for integration because we both have different sense of reasoning and it's difficult to enter a caucus if you don't share similar backgrounds.Nevertheless I think people are still happy with the little friends and social circle they belong to.Have you ever wondered why even as Africans we rarely integrate?It is up to you to choose the things that excite and interest you.Your intention to go back home should not be based on that.

The issue of depression,anger,seclusion and there individualtistic nature this is what thrives them as a people.That is an economical factor,it appears the their society is programmed to offer you the finer things but yet bite you so hard.It is true that everybody to his own is a common practice but not in all cases.I've heard about neighbours who knock on your door to introduce themselves or sometimes even offer you home made treats.I'm sure you've met people on the train and engage in random conversations,I'm sure you find oyinbo chicks easier to catch than dudu chicks so on that note one can't conclude that they are so self thinking.

To be reminded you are not one of them should be a reality check that you are actually not one of them.Why would you want to be ? You have enough things to deal with than be chasing to be on the same heritageous status as a descendant of the land.They say in Yoruba "éni ti ó ba wó ojú iyawó l'o mo wipe o'n sún ékún." Keep your head up,do what you have to do,get yours achieve your goals and when it's time to bounce do it with enough swagger.Don't bother yourself about the British lifestyle.I would suggest a mental state of being in a war zone and your whole aim is to win the war and get out.As long as you understand your rights and are able to express them without deterence you have nothing to piss about.
I'm sure you know there are immigrants who have these so called natives as their employees.

In terms of living a happy life,trust me life is what you make of it.There people in worse situations and are still able to live everyday happy.Your mindset is what creates the outlook of what lies in front of you.Don't let nothing strip you of your personality,try to broaden your thoughts and rationalise the reasons why oyinbo people are the way they are.I don't agree the typical British man does not want any association with a black immigrant I consider that as being a one sided story.What makes you think a typical African wants to socialise with an oyinbo man? Its a two way street mate.
Going elsewhere doesn't change much other than the people and perhaps the society it's pretty much the same everywhere.Canada,the states,Australia,Italy,Spain,Germany etc. However you feel your happiness,financial security,self fulfilment can be achieved is what you should be after.

As much as I empathise with us Nigerians,lets not totally condemn the opportunity either given to us or taken by us surviving in foreign lands.On a final note I support your opinion about living in Nigeria it's one of the best desires an immigrant can fathom however this is often not the case when you check out.

All opinions expressed here are not in any way confirmed of based on true facts they are just personal views.

If he's prepared to stake his whole life,he can go ahead and get married to this internet-woman.Its sounds exciting seeing that actually happening.

@ Crossroads.Your problem seem more of the adaptability to the life in UK than a job in naija.You are currently employed in the UK and enjoy the status of being a legal (temporary) resident.Maybe you should ask yourself if you are in the right job because there is no guarantee that your employment back home will provide you the happiness you desire.I'm sure you are aware of the factors that will frustrate you although not comparable to the existence in the UK do you think you are prepared for that? However I think you are in constantly in tune with your gut feeling and you come across as someone who is bold and daring.
What I would do in your shoes is: Get as much experience and organise your finances,keep your focus on naija for the next 2-3 years.In the meantime make sure you visit every 4-5months and get yourself updated, embark on findings about your sort of job and familiarise (again) with the territory.Eventually you will be able to make a gradual step back to naija.In all take your time, naija no dey go anywhere,your money no dey go anywhere.Maximise your return on investment in the UK.

Emma-Marie:
Is Dreaming Of The Boss Normal?

Hi guys,

I've been working at my job for almost 6 months now and of recent I've been having weird dreams bout the boss who is also female. I've had 3 dreams bout her in the space of 2 months. 2 of the dreams were similar which had a somewhat sexual connotation to it and in the third one she was scolding me bout my dealings in the office.

Please what's your advice? I'm looking for a new job but don't want to quit this one till I get a new one. help!

You already profered the solution to your problems,just keep searching for the job and hopefully when you get one you move on.In regards to the dream you don't need help because you don't expect to find psychics around here do you? Like all the contributors said,it's all in your mind.