₦airaland Forum

MiddleDimension:
exactly my point, you are beginning to see the point i am making. so like it or not too, a man is first rated by what he has, not by anything he thinks of himself which is what you call self esteem, but by what he has materially. if he just goes on with what he has in his mind, and attempts to bring it into relationships or marriage, he will be met with rude shock and will be labelled deluded!

you agree that women are rated first for their looks, and you don't think men have an equivalent of of this unfair thing?

but like i said, if this is not denied, like you are trying to do, then the couple can be adviced when they get into a period the man loses his job, or the woman her looks. the result will be a better relationship between them.

Actually it is not a straight rule that men are rated by their pocket cos i have seen very pretty women who are married to no too well to do men.

Lets be clear here generally speaking men dont loose interest in their wives because she lost her looks that is a fact.

Now based on loosing a job i think the only advice you should be giving your fellow men is to be supportive. A man doesn't work ,he stays at home all day and still expects his wife to come home cook his meal attend to the children and give him sex while he raises his feet up and watch TV all day. That is what usually cases the issue in many cases

MiddleDimension:
what has been told to men is what you have been buy pushing here. that it is men's fault if they can't walk up to successful women thereby denying that women are hypergamous by nature and such a man could be treated with contempt when he attempts it；that they feel all the can offer is just money that's why there is problem in marriages once he loses his job. the truth remains that it is women's innate behaviour to be attracted to men of financial power. the flip side of it for men is to be attracted to women with looks. THIS IS THE POINT I AM MAKING, AND IT IS THE POINT YOU ARE DENYING!

your denying it, or the new trend of denying this, and putting the blames on men is the reason why such homes where the man loses his job begins to experience challenges. once it is admitted, this truth, then we become open to solutions which comes from sound advice from highly experienced people. but when you deny it, like you are doing, then there can be no solution. how do you advice a thing that is denied?

There is no denial here , i say what i know, I don't know about other men in the world but Nigerian men are egotistic and control freaks. They feel threatened by successful women only because they know they have nothing she wants as the only thing they have to offer is their money which she already has.And that is the truth. Even in marriages many Nigerian men feel threatened if their wife's carrier starts to advance.


A thread where a man lost his job yet refused to help out in the house and even refused his wife getting a maid is a typical example of the pride Nigerian men carry. I have seen both worlds ,one who is cooperative that people don't even know his wife is the bread winner and another who feels his wife is turning him into a house husband and has become bitter.

Xmen149:
it's not..but mentality money girls are pushing

if a man can make enough money To take care of himself he can date,. if he can make enough to feed and house 2 or more he can marry

Yankee boy working looks like he is a super man cos he lives a comfy life on credit card

Las Las it's not about money,character, emotional intelligence etc.cos like you said a rude rich guy will only be managed

here in Naija alot is expected of a male youth..it takes a lady that loves a guy truely to stay with a broke guy or with a guy when broke and plan with him.

lol..but I still dnt get some things oh...does a lady dating a rich guy automatically mean the guys richness will appear in her pocket. Carry her in sit front sit,give her few cash to shop she will still go home broke...it will make more sense if she see her man of the future in him and him same thing they both make plans and make money together creating a future of their dreams

but there are people getting married every Saturday who are not rich,some can only afford blessings of marriage not even a wedding where do these guys find such ladies?. You want someone who uses organic cream and her foundation for her face alone is 25k.

Now let me make this very clear, women have their standards just as men have their spec. Its human nature.If that girl you like prefers guys with deeper pocket i am sure there are so many ladies out there who are aiming for men within your standard. Stop all this whining abeg. I see men who do this as irritating. i have met broke assholes,so its not a matter of being rich and lets not forget that poverty humbles people,most of the guys forming humble will turn turn monsters when the money come like the saying If you want to know the true character of a man give him money.

MiddleDimension:
the same reason rich drug lords pull the sort of women a professor can never pull.
@ladycewhy

you want a woman of high maintenance you cant afford? There is beauty standards,admit it or not women are first rated by their beauty now if that is where your eye is,be ready to pay the price.

MiddleDimension:
it is not man's mentality. it is important you don't tell this to your son because he will only suffer! we have seen it a lot. i asked you a question if it is a lady's mentality that she needs her appearance to keep her man, or that it is an intrinsic thing with men, their women's appearance? you still have not answered

and how are the scenarios different

you want to know how the scenarios are different? I am tempted to ask if you live in a cave or something. In the ladder of social strata there is a woman for every man. There are men who have gotten married this year who didn't have the funds to throw lavish societal wedding yet they had a woman who was willing to live that life with them. The problem most of you men have is you want to "do pass yourself". You are earning 50k as salary but you want to date a lady that only her organic cream is 15k. Now this is not to say men should not go for their spec but the truth is some ladies are higher mantainance than others same goes for guys too.Everyone in life has standards same way many men after coming into money feel their wife is not their spec.


Regarding your question,based on what i have seen, no amount of beauty or looking good can keep a man ,a man stays because he wants to.

And by the way i am tempted to ask what your own mother told you cos from what i am seeing it has not made the Nigerian society better either with the crop of men we have.

MiddleDimension:
if you admit it once that it is women's nature not to respect men who are broke, not because of anything, but because he is broke, you will not die.
putting the blame on men only denies the issue! i wonder if you agree that it is the woman's fault if her husband loses interest in her once she changes in appearance? is she just being paranoid, or is it really true that it is in men's nature not to be interested in women that don't look appealing to them？

This is the mentality that has made all of you men think all you have to do is make money and you ignore other aspects of your character. Men think money brings resect from women,but the truth is if you are an asshole ,money will only make you be tolerated not Cherished.

Now there are two scenarios here, a man going broke after you met him and meeting a man while he is broke. This are two different scenario with two likely outcomes so do well to let me know which one you are making reference to.

Everything on that list except A, but the trick here is most guys feel their only tool for control is the money they put on the table so when they loose that tool( money) they become aggressive and resentful ,any small thing you will hear something like 'its because i don't have money shey?". So it makes it difficult to stay with men when they go broke except you met them broke.

ghost3040:
You are worse than the kids..

lol FBI

NwaAmaikpe:




This is the problem with the absence of a functional consumer protection system in Nigeria.
Everyone is at the mercy of everyone.

But I'd love to know,

Aside showing genuine empathy, do you honestly think GUO is/was under any obligation to ensure the release of their kidnapped passengers?
Because I do not.
I may be wrong but I am open to Lalas. ticlala and other elders putting me right.

They are a transport company for fvck's sake and not an Elite Marine squad.
I doubt they even have an insurance policy on travellers or that any contractual agreement exists with passengers wherein they undertake to an unfailing delivery to destination.

The good thing here is that you got your relative back alive, but I'd say you spent too much energy on the transport company and it is sad that they treated you as petty scum and that is probably how they saw you considering you channeled none of such energy on the security agents and kidnappers in whose hands your relative's release solely lay in.

The wise ones here are your other relatives who saw the bigger picture and sought their salvation away from the tranpsort company.

The social media thing has given us a misguided spirit of aluta that solely hinges on blackmail.

Sit down and think again,
Do you know that if it was only you that your relative had, he'd probably be dead now while you'd have only succeeded in a viral smear campaign.

Next time life is involved, please use your head.

While at it, grow some conscience too.
To think you expect a transport company to dole out 1million as ransom for a passenger who probably paid less than 5k.

Ask yourself if you'd do the same if you owned GUO.

seems your medication is working ,you have made a bit of sense today even tho i will not completely agree with your submission but its better than your vile sadistic comments you are accustomed to dishing out.

Back to the topic, why was the transport company was laid back in addressing the kidnapping issue and denying any knowledge of what happened to their bus and its occupants. We all saw how this transport companies traded blames at the expense of dead passengers few weeks back.

One would have to wonder what manuscripts are for ,if it is not a contractual agreement to take people to the destination they paid for

So i am assuming you are in support of the behavior of the transport company's response to family members who are worried sick about the safety of their kidnapped relatives. How people still use GUO to travel baffles me ,considering they are always in the news for the wrong reasons.smh

Riele:
No , he just helped grow it

i like your spirit. Dont let these clowns get to you. I have seen old fools on this forum,apparently old age is not a sign of wisdom. go girl.

Dpaulie:
This is why you should not always get angry or reply with aggressive reply when you are insulted on nairaland, 90% of nairalanders are small pikins

i know some 30 plus old male foolish nairalanders here. So nor be by age.

Chukabiz:
One Man robbed a bank? Was he invisible or what?

i was just asking myself that same question. 65 years old for that matter.

The same sharia law they want to impose on the entire country. I heard there is one Muslim okada man that doesn't carry women on his bike .
Will the keke driver that will carry women be women in full hijab? That one you can only see the eyes? If not this law is not complete o. Let ninja dressed women only carry women while men only carry men


But its still a fact that places where laws like this exist have the highest rate of homosexuals and cases of sodomy of young boys in this country.smh

RaptorX:
Is it poverty and desperation making people take up this humanitarian aids job offer.

i wonder, putting their life at risk only become spoils of war to terrorists.

JONNYSPUTE:
..Let those men create a thread first,then I will know what I will say based on what Iread.. You prefer I pamper her by telling her lies instead of the truth abi? Rubbish ingredients.

No i prefer you leave your obsession with feminist seeing that the only thing you have not accused feminists of is climate change which i am sure you will some day ,"oh women connived with the devil to turn up the heat that is why the sun is too hot"

By the way guys here have admitted to being that way or are you selectively blind?. I can see she has even replied you. Your Yeye dey smell

JONNYSPUTE:
.. If you like mteeewww from now till tomorrow. Truth can never be covered.Merry Christmas and a prosperous new year in advance.

Lets hear what you have to say about men that have this same type of behavior then. Nonsense and ingredients.

officialblaze:
you are possesed, your spiritual husband will not let you settle down...you need deliverance. if you continue like this, you might end up single for the rest of your life

i was looking out for this comment, una nor dey disappoint for this forum

JONNYSPUTE:
When you were busy listening to crap ideology in the name of feminism,hating men up and down,what do you expect? It's not gonna be easy for you to love because your whole mind is already made up that men are scum. Truth is not polite.As per regretting it. I bet you if you don't work on itself,you will not only regret this particular one,infact you regret the path you ve chosen. I can bet you were never like this until you got mixed up with some fellow ladies that misled you. Anyways,I wish you well. Remain blessed.

bla bla bla una nor dey tire? Even guys here have agreed to having this type of behavior so what are we going to attribute that of men to? Na whah for una o,mteeewww.

Seun360:
Women, I hate them with passion, I hope their will be an outbreak that will wipe out all of them from the surface.

lol, unfortunately for you that will not happen.

Cursed be the womb that bore you,it would have been better you were not allowed to mature into a foetus to begin with.

Neddstark:
Alright. You're right and made some good sense. But I never exonerated the man, punishment of educating an extra mouth till secondary school is some big deal. Thats just what i recommended

the best recommendation here is for Nigerians to stop taking in under aged maids. And let parents who give out their kids as maids be punished too.many people breed like rabbits expecting others to help them raise their kids . If you are not dead ,your kids have no business living with someone else.

abbey621:
True, it's almost as if the law was designed to protect inncocent people until proven guilty

On the other hand it has made alot of terrible people get away from punishment or even get lesser punishment. Let's not forget this burden of proof has also sent many innocent people to jail . It cuts both ways.

Neddstark:
The injustice was not done in his front. Ever asked why she did it outside his presence? Stop jumping to conclusions. Let every human carry his sin. But as a consequence of his ignorance, let his money talk. So you wanna tell me if you marry a scammer and he gets caught, you should be jailed too?

By the way, have you forgotten that they have kids? Should their innocent kids be abandoned totally because of one stupid parent?

A scammer and this are very different,the man housed a child for labour. If he didnt approve ,the maid will not be under his roof in the first place. From the time he gave his approval to have a child be used as maid he became am accomplice and culpable of whatever happens to that child.


"We also arrested Mr. Jonathan Goewan, the uncle to the victim, who out of greed brought her to Enugu from Jos and probably sold her to this wicked family.


The bolded is where it gets clear that it could even be a case of child trafficking. Ignorance of the law is not an excuse.

abbey621:
Unless you can prove that she maltreated the maid outside of the incident witnessed on the video and in the presence of the man then I don't see how he could be charged with anything besides child labor.

That is the issue with the law all over the world. The burden of proof has been the bane of justice.

Neddstark:
I said let him be made to pay for the child's education. Thats a big punishment

Being indifferent in the face of injustice makes you just as guilty as the perpetrator. He can not tell me he was not aware of his wife's demeanor towards the maid.

Neddstark:
Let the husband be freed, but made to pay the child's education till secondary stage. As for the evil woman, let her be detained for 4 months so her brains can be reset.

have you heard of the word "accomplice"?

Nigerians Stop taking under aged kids as maids!!! .You want a maid ,hire one and pay.


We are entering a new decade ,its time to do away with alot of things and grow as a people. Many Nigerians take a gamble on producing kids. They birth like rabbits with the hope that atleast one will be successful hence push their parental responsibility to others by giving their kids out. It is annoying. The only reason a kid should be sent to live with someone if if they are orphans.


I am glad the law caught up with them

InvertedHammer:
/
The Bible has been altered many times by different kings. Some excised the parts that seemed to challenge their authorities.

Whatever China decides to write will be held as the absolute truth by fanatics some years from now. You can only go by what you are taught.

\

You are absolutely right. Seems alot of people don't know what "king James' version " means

BABYLUVLY:
My ofada sauce and rice. My first time though. But we enjoyed it. Merry Christmas from here.

i miss ofada rice. The aroma from the leaf is heavenly.

Merry Christmas nairalanders

All this killings to what end?

Mckandre:
Nigerians and malt as first aid.

i had to chuckle at this comment