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MrAboki's Posts

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Nairaland / General / Re: What Is Your New Year Resolution? by MrAboki: 10:14am On Dec 31, 2013
1. Travel to Saudi Arabia
2. Travel to Yemen
3. Travel to Borno State
4. Learn how to handle weapons.
5. Pass my Hezbollah & Tuareg entrance exams
6. Pray deligently.


7. Stack up more Virgins in the afterlife..



grin

iKid, iKid.. grin

4 Likes

Politics / Re: Boko-Haram Gunmen Kill 12 At Wedding Party.... DEAD HUMANS [PHOTO] by MrAboki: 10:02am On Dec 31, 2013
Dayuuuum!! shocked shocked shocked


See as them pack human being inside Hilux like cement.. shocked






No surprises sha..

The F.G is still playing politics with this Boko Haram issue. Until the F.G recognises Boko Haram for what it truly is, this will not stop. The day they kill a Governor, thats the day Nigerians would understand what they are up against.



Allah be Praised..
Family / Re: Baker Faces Jail For Refusing To Bake Cake For Gay Couple by MrAboki: 8:21pm On Dec 10, 2013
Seun: There was a time when living as a black American was very inconvenient because most places of business would refuse to serve black people. Can you imagine going to a restaurant with your white friends only to be told that they "don't serve your type here?" Or a petrol station? Or to not be allowed to attend a good school even though your academics are strong? That's what America was like before the laws that convicted this man were created. It does a lot of damage to members of minority groups if people are allowed to refuse to do business with "their type".


you sir have a great mind..

its so easy to forget that once upon a time, it was niggers that where the homos of that time..

3 Likes

Crime / Re: Court Remands Man For Killing Alleged Gay Chief by MrAboki: 10:45am On Dec 10, 2013
shadydeals: We should not forget that the story says that the late chief molested him sexually. If this fact can be established in court by the defendant, then it is a case of rape or attempted rape. What will happen to the late chief if he had attempted to rape a girl and was caught? Certainlly he would have been jailed by now for that. So let them see the case as sexual molestation, and free the boy.

Even if it is confirmed that the Chief raped the boy, the circumstances under which the boy killed the chief makes him a murderer..

Plus!! Isnt it silly that u are basing ur judgement on just the testimony of the boy? Have you heard from the deceased?

Remember:

The boy killed the chief.
Locked him in a room
Didnt call for help
Stole the chiefs belongings
Locked him in the house and handed over the key
Then absconded..



When he was caught, he now says the Chief tried to rape him.. grin

6 Likes

Jokes Etc / Re: Different Types Of Call Summaries by MrAboki: 9:55am On Dec 09, 2013
'Boy to Dad'...

Its funny how our calls dont last more than 30secs max 1 minute..

A typical call would be

Aboki: hello Sir
Dad: Yes, what can I do for you
Aboki: Good morning sir
Dad: Ehen, Good morning.. You still have not told me what you want.
Aboki: Abeg i need like 300'k, need to take ccare of some things..
Dad: Erm...... I will see what i can do..

**phone cuts**

Its like that all the time. Even when he calls me, its the same. Our longest call ever should prolly be like 4 - 5mins tops and it was because we were discussing a business deal he was trying to enter into..

Why are men like this? Even amongst us as friends, the calls no dey last.. But when we call babe, we fit dey for 1 hr, meanwhile, we only paid attention for less than 10mins of the call. grin

3 Likes

Jokes Etc / Re: Oxford Dictionary Defines ASUU. by MrAboki: 1:17pm On Dec 02, 2013
Jokes Etc / Re: Oxford Dictionary Defines ASUU. by MrAboki: 1:14pm On Dec 02, 2013
Politics / Re: Is Melaye Serious With His "Fight Against Corruption" by MrAboki: 12:15pm On Nov 23, 2013
Dino should go and swear that he has never benefitted from corruption in Nigeria.. angry
Sports / Re: Kelechi Iheanacho Declared Missing by MrAboki: 12:08pm On Nov 23, 2013
jhidey08: I saw dis coming. When his assistant coach (Emmanuel Amunike) slapped d American agent pple came here and started yarbing him, dis is d end result. D boy has been lured 2 sign a slave contract nw I'm sure. I pray d boy suffer 4dis action.


Nwokem...

A 17 year old CANNOT enter into a legally binding contract with anybody...
Nairaland / General / Re: Soldiers Harass Civilians For Putting On Camouflage by MrAboki: 2:15pm On Nov 19, 2013
shevon: You wouldn't expect any less from them (especially the illitrate recruits)
I recently returned from Europe where I bought and wore camo shirts and dog tag (obviously not military issue) without anybody asking questions or harassing me. Just this last friday, I went to the bank to carry out a transaction and I noticed most of the customers there were young military officers (small children fah!); immediately I left, 5 of them trailed me outside, stopped me and demanded that I identify myself. Because I didn't know who they were, I asked them to do so first and none of them could; I then asked if there was any issue but they didn't (rather couldn't) respond. Next thing I know, a 6th person just came out of the bank and shouted "Comot am joor!", one of them just cut my dog tag and they all walked away. Meanwhile, it wasn't as if I was wearing any military apparel (I was wearing a white shirt on a blue jean with my work safty boots o) or was I claiming to be a military officer in any way, the reason they did it, I don't know.
Anyway, instead of causing a scene, I just walked away, called the branch manager of the bank who stopped all transactions to them and insisted they release the tag to him or else he will not attend to them again until they gave him the tag.
Imagine that kind of harassment from mofos, who couldn't express themselves properly, just because they were given khaki and are being paid from tax payers money - part of which I contributed to o - in my own country.


Nigerian Military dogtags are so ugly that you wouldnt want to wear them..

Imagine them cutting off your dog tag.. I have two custom dog tags.. They carry my name, blood type, genotype and emergency telephone number on it.

When a western Military sees a civilian, he thinks of protecting them
When a Nigerian Military sees a civilian, he thinks of how to molest him.
Education / Re: Boy Kills Classmate Over Damaged Earphone by MrAboki: 1:51pm On Nov 19, 2013
the_ripper3: Aboki na aboki.




At 13, most kids in the South are already in Secondary school.



Shey you never chop daggar before .. angry
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 12:42pm On Nov 19, 2013
born2fuck:

That remind me of aboki shine my shoe song. Carry Go.

Must aboki I know are shoe maker, boko haram sponsors, government thief , bureau de change or maruwa. For you to chop money without doing any of those, kudos to you.


Abeg, how you fit help me arrange hausa babe between 21_23 years, clean and coded. PM me.....nothing cocern me with people paying monthly again, I no our goverment selfish, if our goverment pay that money, walahi, rapture go happen


Lol @ Rapture..

Make Government pay our senators 25'k per month... angry Afterall, many of them no be graduate, can barely speak proper english talkless of write, have fake degrees (Remember Salisu the Toronto graduate), e.t.c..

Make them pay them 25'k..



On the 21 yr old girl matter.. All Hausa babes over the age of 3 don marry or them don book her.. Na from under 3 still dey market.. grin[/b]
Crime / Re: 2 Female Undergraduates Stripped For Robbery In Calabar by MrAboki: 12:36pm On Nov 19, 2013
Where the Picture na?!
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 12:35pm On Nov 19, 2013
dazzy4real: 25k here is not the issue, the main issue is let them be retained..


25'k is the issue o!!

You cant pay a graduate 25'k.. angry

No Nigerian should be living on 25'k a month. Its just not right.

Retrained?! Why?! Are you questioning their initial training?! You make it sound like this is a favour that the government is giving to graduates. Okay!! Imagine that one of the beneficiacires happens to be you. And you have to move from Ibadan to Lagos for 1 year.. No house, no car, no relative.. How will you survive on 25'k (850 naira per day)..

25'k is the issue.. Infact, the companies should also offer these graduates Healthcare + Workmans compensation Insurance (as required by Law).
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 12:23pm On Nov 19, 2013
born2fuck: ur father left nyansh, even if you bi yahoo yahoo boys,, you go suffer before you get maga now adays except you want use your dick do ritual abi your papa dey among those steal nigeria money


If I be yahoo boy, make e no better for me or my children. angry

I no be thief oga.. I dey go work like every other Nigerian. I no dey work for government either nor my Papa either..


Plus, why must every Nigerian wey dey chop small bread be a thief or in government?! Na so una dey reason?! grin

So person no fit tear for Naije without being a thief or Politician?!

1 Like

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:49am On Nov 19, 2013
tomakint:
...still better than nothing aboki mana undecided

Chairman.. grin I salute you!!


Bros I can never gree!! Omo wetin I use eye see as a corper, I no go wish am on anybody. My company paid me 15'k. Plus NYSC 9'5. Ye I still see crase. Then dem come ban bikes for town, Transport immediately multiply by 4.

Hommie do the maths. Divide 25 by 30 days to understand how much a Graduate is supposed to live on daily.. No na... Human being no be Nama. Even some dogs dey chop pass 800 Naira food a day with Pedigree & Jojo dog food.. grin


I feel insulted!

2 Likes

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:44am On Nov 19, 2013
richeyy:

At least it's something tongue


25'k is Nothing!! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!

Infact.. its shiit.. Atleast 1500 naira a day.. so by the time 500 goes on transport, 500 goes on food, the guy still has 500 naira left to attend to miscellenous bills and responsibilities..


45000 naira = 1500 per day.
25,000 naira = 850 per day.


Plus, this scheme sounds like another NYSC scheme.. No real susbstance to it.

1 Like

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:39am On Nov 19, 2013
Polio:

Can you show any evidence that you have spent 25k on recharge cards monthly, for the past three months?

Ode!


Hahahahaaa


Between my 3 phone lines and my Ipad.. grin Nwokem.. My monthly phone bill fit blow your mind... grin

No use people persona on Nairaland judge them o!!
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:34am On Nov 19, 2013
Dear Jonathan

Please channel that 15Billion Naira straight into the Power sector.. LET THERE BE LIGHT...



When there is light, start properly implementing Business friendly incentives.. example;

- Businesses that are related to Agriculture would get tax exemption for 2years or even three..
- Businesses that are into fabrication, production and manufacturing get certain tax exemption for the first X number of years and should their employee stranght exceed certain bench marks, they get some sort of tax relief..

e.t.c..

We have intellectuals in Nigeria.. Gather them and let them figure out these deals.. Rather than give Tax & Duty waivers to companies like Coscharis to import 300 cars for itself, give it to a new indigenous company.

Local content can be done better.. For example every expartraite that is employed into Nigeria, 2 Local Nigerian Graduates must be employed to understudy that expatriate until he leaves... angry The job I work Today was because I understudied my Oyinbo boss for 1 year. Today, I have his Job title and responsibilities by a stroke of luck that saw him leave and gave me the chance to shine.. But I have not seen another case like mine since I came in. Rather, we keep recycling Oyinbos around and the government keeps taking 1% of their salaries as Local Content levy.. Utter nonsense..



I no go school on credit.. 25'K per month na rubbish!! Anybody wey e vex, go hug transformer.. Me I don speak my mind and I go still speak more..

1 Like

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:22am On Nov 19, 2013
Hartarmah:

Don't ever say this in d public or in a general gathering,or else u could b stoned......lol.Hw will u say it is nt d functn of govt to create jobs.I can see dt u r one f d half baked cake/pre mature cock produced by our faulty educational system in d country.Gada informatn bfore u talk,is going to elp u avoid insults.Do u knw hw many persons NITEL wuld ve employed if nt ruined by govt nd odas like dt.Be current nd versatile for gud reputation.

Hahahaaa!!

MTN, GLO, ETISALAT, AIRTEL, STARCOMMS, etc have created more jobs in under 14years than Nitel created in all their existence.. Still unemployment still full..

Its the job of Government to create the suitable environment for businesses to grow. The larger a business grows, the more hands would needed. Imagine how much companies in Nigeria would save on Diesel.. Imagine if these companies now channel this savings into expanding their businesses?! Imagine how much companies would save on Security.. Imagine if they transfer those savings into their businesses?! Imagine how much companies would save on Vehicle maintainance if our roads were good?! Transfer that savings into the business and.......


Simple economics..

For every deficiency of the government, businesses would have to cover those from their pockets, which means less money that could have gone back into the business.
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:16am On Nov 19, 2013
dmcdad:
Haba! At all at all na im bad pass na... At all at all na winsch!

Bros!! Instead wey person go turn me to slave, I go dey chop Tapioka and groundnut sleep..


25'k per month?!!

haba na!!! You sef check am well na... This is the same slave labor that the government subjected Corpers to.. Graduates working for 9'5 per month for big companies and banks and schools. Same corper have to fend for their accomodation, feeding, up keep etc. for 9thousand 5!! angry


God punish poverty mentality.. I no go even look enployment letter wey dey offer me 200'k per month 2 times.. angry
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:10am On Nov 19, 2013
theoctopus:



You guys dont have to post if you have nothing to post. Maybe you are criminals or your parents or uncles are politicians, so you get free money. That does not give you the right to talk nonsense on an online forum. The news is obviously not for you so just waka pass. Thank you


Nwokem... Shattap!! angry


[b]25'k for a graduate is crap without some form of support from the host companies in terms of accomodation & transport logistics..

All I said was that 25'k is small and you turn around and attack me. Just because a person is struggling does not mean you should take advantage of them. 25'k for our graduates is a joke. Even I will not work for any entity for less than a certain amount a month. And NO! I dont work for the government, neither do I have parents, uncles or whatever that work for the government. Infact, I hate the fact that I have to pay my Taxes to this government sef because they have done nothing for me..



Even some Maiguards, housegirls and drivers now earn more than 25'k per month.. angry As a corper, I was earning about 25'k culmulative monthly and God knows it was hell. And if you are too slow to reason, let me help you;

25'thousand divided by 30days = 833 Naira per day!! Barely 5 US Dollars a day!!


So a Nigerian Graduate is only worth this?!


I will gladly pay A sound Graudate this 25'k per month with bonuses and perks to work for me as my P.A. angry

No wonder illiterate Politicans dey chop our money... . angry[/b]

3 Likes

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 11:01am On Nov 19, 2013
Sike: Can you Send me just 1k MTN Card?


I'll do you one better.. Drop your number here and I'll credit your account
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: SURE-P To Pay Unemployed Graduates N25,000 Monthly - FG by MrAboki: 9:43am On Nov 19, 2013
25'k.... grin



That na recharge card money na!!
Career / Re: List of Companies That Promote Staff Welfare And Treat Them Well by MrAboki: 9:15am On Nov 19, 2013
Orikinla: MTN is still number 1, followed by the Nigeria LNG Limited and Shell.


Total E&P bro... grin

Shell... Hmmmm!!!! Not really! Their union is dead + Shell is slowly but surely closing shop in Nigeria.

Agip.. Worst of all IOC's. Only Management level dey groove for that company.
Religion / Re: If You Are Left Behind On Rapture Day, Will You Accept 666 Mark Of The Beast? by MrAboki: 8:24am On Nov 19, 2013
Before them go even ask me, I go don tattoo the number for my head, hand and leg... grin

Then I go join the Anti-Christ Police dey catch people without plate number.. grin









lol... Niggas be tripping!

1 Like

Career / Re: List of Companies That Promote Staff Welfare And Treat Them Well by MrAboki: 7:44pm On Nov 18, 2013
davide470:
If na you get the company, would you pay all your outlined stuff..

@OP, Amazon Energy! (Though the CEO needs to be taught the principle and possibilities of GodFatherism in bidding for EPC Contracts)



Not all but atleast give me:

1. Healthcare that covers my Wife and kids
2. Leave Bonus
3. Christmas Bonus (aka 13th month)
4. Lunch allowance or actual lunch
5. Car loan or house loan..


Workmans compensation insurance is mandatory under the law.

HSE kit.. This should be a must.
Phones / Re: Share Your Phone Loss/theft Experiences Here!!! by MrAboki: 7:39pm On Nov 18, 2013
I lost a phone every semester from 1st year to final year..

All solid phones including:

P800 Sony Ericsson

P900 Sony Ericsson

Nokia 6600 (still love this phone)

E.t.c.
Politics / Re: Jimoh Ibrahim Arrested Over N6.8B Tax Fraud by MrAboki: 5:55pm On Nov 18, 2013
And 6.8 Billion Naira in Taxes is not outrageous..



Nigerians keep thinking its his P.I.T.. grin

What about his Witholding Taxes & Value Added Taxes for all his companies?!
Politics / Re: Jimoh Ibrahim Arrested Over N6.8B Tax Fraud by MrAboki: 5:52pm On Nov 18, 2013
Ozin: How much did this dude make to be owing this much as tax




See Question o!!


A whole Jimoh Ibrahim!!1 Nigeria's No 1. destroyer of Companies. grin
Career / Re: List of Companies That Promote Staff Welfare And Treat Them Well by MrAboki: 5:40pm On Nov 18, 2013
alaoeri: GSK
Wemco (Friesland makers of peak milk and three crown).
Nigerdock.
Netco.
Guinness.


Tufiakwa!!!


Nigerdock wey stingy die.. angry


When I hear Staff Welfare, it must include the following

Includes;

1. Pension
2. Healthcare (for spouse and atleast 3 - 4 dependants)
3. Housing loan
4. Car loan
5. Welfare loan
6. Christmas Bonus
7. Leave Bonus
8. Employee relevant Trainings (For career growth)
9. Spouse allowance
10. Life Assurance policies
11. Workmans Compensation Insurance
12. Emphasis of HSE
13. Lunch Meals/allowance


e.t.c..




Some companies pay nonsense with great welfare packages... However, the best remains permanent staff of Multi-national companies..

1 Like

Career / Re: List of Companies That Promote Staff Welfare And Treat Them Well by MrAboki: 5:31pm On Nov 18, 2013
alaoeri: GSK
Wemco (Friesland makers of peak milk and three crown).
Nigerdock.
Netco.
Guinness.


Tufiakwa!!!


Nigerdock wey stingy die.. angry

1 Like

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