₦airaland Forum

odenkirk:
nobody can do that for me.

odenkirk:
which crime can i commit that will land me in prison for just one week?
i want to go there and spend a week because i dont wanna end up being lynched by other jobless and frustrated guys like me. the money that i have been using to hold body have finished, and i dont have any means of getting any.
bad ideas have filled my mind, and i am afraid of executing it, that is why i want to get isolated so that i will not do what my mind has been telling me.
yesterday i tried one of the bad ideas and it was a successful mission. i want to earn legitly to avoid stories that touch the heart.
for now, i have given up about getting a job because it seems there is no any left for us in this country. yesterday i queued for morethan 3 hours infront of one factory that pay 30k per month and i did not get the job, only 3people were selected and it was based on physical appearance.
i am thinking of slapping a police officer, but i am afraid of the kind of beating they will give me before they send me to prison. guys please recommend any simple crime that will lead me to going to prison for just one week.
the only different from my life and that of the prison inmates is freedom of movement, the prisoners have more advantage which i dont have, they are entitled to 3square meals a day. i want to go there and have more experience about life and restrategize.

badboyTee:
I met this girl in my church, very beautiful from there collected her contact. We started talking she was the one who actually chatted me up first, during the first few weeks we chatted she was always on my neck with calls chats if she doesn't see me online she calls me we talk a lot asks me different questions about my ex's which I told her I had none ( though I haven't asked her out at that moment)

I decided to give the devil ball a goal I asked her out she told me she would give me her response once we meet physically

Note: I asked her out about one month after we started talking which I thought she had all the qualities I needed from a lady,

* she doesn't tax me
* make sure she calls me to check on me

Then after asking her out she told me she had no one at the moment but she only likes us to be friends my head wan scatter, like everyone around the neighborhood already thought we were into each other the way she holds me in public always makes sure we sit together in church e.t.c

I asked her out again she gave me same response that she doesn't want our friendship to end that we should remain friends.

Big men in the game what could be the cause of this or is it cause I don't spend on her?

badboyTee:
I met this girl in my church, very beautiful from there collected her contact. We started talking she was the one who actually chatted me up first, during the first few weeks we chatted she was always on my neck with calls chats if she doesn't see me online she calls me we talk a lot asks me different questions about my ex's which I told her I had none ( though I haven't asked her out at that moment)

I decided to give the devil ball a goal I asked her out she told me she would give me her response once we meet physically

Note: I asked her out about one month after we started talking which I thought she had all the qualities I needed from a lady,

* she doesn't tax me
* make sure she calls me to check on me

Then after asking her out she told me she had no one at the moment but she only likes us to be friends my head wan scatter, like everyone around the neighborhood already thought we were into each other the way she holds me in public always makes sure we sit together in church e.t.c

I asked her out again she gave me same response that she doesn't want our friendship to end that we should remain friends.

Big men in the game what could be the cause of this or is it cause I don't spend on her?

Nitong:
Hello family, I was studying the Bible and I suddenly got calls from these numbers. Are they Nigerian numbers because they appear to be longer than normal numbers.

Hope they aren't kidnappers numbers

020930591183

020930597979


Has any one received calls from them before?
Hope it's safe

Demichaels:
In LOVE'S radiant embrace, our souls entwine,
Yearning for the sanctuary of an IDEAL Home divine.
Like the PETALS of a graceful autumn bloom,
We flourish, entwined in affection's sweet perfume.
Pledged to each other ere our fateful meet,
No bond can rival the love we replete.
We are REKELS, crafting dreams in PETALS' HOME,
Creating a haven where love finds its grace. SEALED By the TRINITY

mamagee3:
[color=deeppink]Do you like my profile photo?

“Like” my profile photo if you like my profile photo[/color]

Kriss216:
I cook very well and you like me.

hardon1:
As I no see wife make I find fvck mate😁😁😁

If your a lady and like sex... Let's Bleep and explore fantasies at will. I am calm, cool mature and reserved + the gbola try too

Reside in warri Delta
O8o6379o548

kayalla:
I came to nairaland to check, thought it was wifi at home.

Carcholce:
Sirr, what if after She gives you the punnny you run away and ruin the friendship.

You are wickked sirr. No offencse

Thanos1000:
I'm not here to bash women or talk bad about them. No one is perfect but what i do ponder on is that. Why do some women who mostly go to church every now and then tends to be the most untrustworthy??
Like in most cases when your girlfriend or wife tends to attend church like say na there then born her.
It feels off in some ways for me

Winterhaven:
Mathematiciansin the house, Come in and solve this maths.

mamagee3:
[color=deeppink]If you are denied an American visa multiple times, does it mean the applicant is unlikeable?[/color]

ChildOfDoom:
Hmm. Who would have thought that despite my standing in the society, I would stoop so low to embarrass myself at a brothel.

So it happened that I got some side deals in the office which gave me about 14000 naira. I thought I had arrived and decided to visit a brothel yesterday night

I had about 4300 in my account and 9800 cash. My plan was to use just 9000 naira maximum cash for two ladies and then take 800 naira change home.

I approached the first lady who charged 3000 naira. I wanted more. To help me cum as I rode her. I was charged extra 3000 to add romance and kiss. After I came, I was left with 3800 cash.

On going out, I met a new girl on low cut I needed to taste badly. She said she only takes 6000 and above and nothing less. But she promised to give me anyhow I wanted it. But she said it must be cash payment due to bad MTN network as her madam was not accepting transfer.

I gave her 3000 and promised to go withdraw the remaining 3000 to settle her. She held my small phone as guarantee.

After we lashed, I kept begging to do transfer. She refused o. She kept shouting 'my Toto nor be for transfer. Na only cash'. What saved me is that, the girls in the brothel knew me and tried to convince her I will pay. If I was a random guy, Dem for embarrass me

Just when I was thinking of how I will look for a POS that late to withdraw the balance 3000 for her and then manage the last 1300 in the account together with the 800 on me for feeding, a short girl with big navel who was on weed passed and asked me if I wanted to lash.

Foolish me followed her in with my miserable paper bag. I negotiated 2000. And climbed and pumped till I came. Now I was in a debt of 5000. 4300 in account and 800 cash. How was I going to eat if I paid it all

So I gave the big-navel girl 500 naira and held 300 change for bottle Pepsi and biscuit to recover my energy. I told her I would transfer the remaining 1500. I transferred 3500 from my account to the madam. 1500 for the short girl and 2000 for the low-cut babe. So I could survive with 800

She kept screaming, 'no be our agreement. Na 3000 remain and my Toto nor be for transfer'. The madam was not even around to confirm the transfer. I left the brothel in shame, telling her to hold my small phone till when we settle everything.

Thank God Dem nor hold me local. Fvck will soon put me in the same problem as betting

ChildOfDoom:
Hmm. Who would have thought that despite my standing in the society, I would stoop so low to embarrass myself at a brothel.

So it happened that I got some side deals in the office which gave me about 14000 naira. I thought I had arrived and decided to visit a brothel yesterday night

I had about 4300 in my account and 9800 cash. My plan was to use just 9000 naira maximum cash for two ladies and then take 800 naira change home.

I approached the first lady who charged 3000 naira. I wanted more. To help me cum as I rode her. I was charged extra 3000 to add romance and kiss. After I came, I was left with 3800 cash.

On going out, I met a new girl on low cut I needed to taste badly. She said she only takes 6000 and above and nothing less. But she promised to give me anyhow I wanted it. But she said it must be cash payment due to bad MTN network as her madam was not accepting transfer.

I gave her 3000 and promised to go withdraw the remaining 3000 to settle her. She held my small phone as guarantee.

After we lashed, I kept begging to do transfer. She refused o. She kept shouting 'my Toto nor be for transfer. Na only cash'. What saved me is that, the girls in the brothel knew me and tried to convince her I will pay. If I was a random guy, Dem for embarrass me

Just when I was thinking of how I will look for a POS that late to withdraw the balance 3000 for her and then manage the last 1300 in the account together with the 800 on me for feeding, a short girl with big navel who was on weed passed and asked me if I wanted to lash.

Foolish me followed her in with my miserable paper bag. I negotiated 2000. And climbed and pumped till I came. Now I was in a debt of 5000. 4300 in account and 800 cash. How was I going to eat if I paid it all

So I gave the big-navel girl 500 naira and held 300 change for bottle Pepsi and biscuit to recover my energy. I told her I would transfer the remaining 1500. I transferred 3500 from my account to the madam. 1500 for the short girl and 2000 for the low-cut babe. So I could survive with 800

She kept screaming, 'no be our agreement. Na 3000 remain and my Toto nor be for transfer'. The madam was not even around to confirm the transfer. I left the brothel in shame, telling her to hold my small phone till when we settle everything.

Thank God Dem nor hold me local. Fvck will soon put me in the same problem as betting

AndrewTate:
If you are trying to find out why you act the way you do it's not a wise thing to generalize it.
If you are looking for a solution to your problem go straight to the point.

Stop saying “ALL MEN”!

190:
Corky joe do you phuck them anal?

Ryda:
As seen on the street of social Media. A user posted video of animals killed by a hunter. There's a Warthog, Civet and other unidentified animals in the video.

The camera man had just one job, move the camera around so that we can have a proper view of the hunters kill.

Credit: 92 wolf

Omihanifa:
https://thenationonlineng.net/i-contemplated-bleaching-after-mide-martins-insult-habibat-jinad/

Aboks:
Real mean lol dont follow married women , only gigolos like u

i pray the husband catch u one day

na so dem go follow ur wife

Aboks:
Who was your english teacher

Natbrowny:
ALL MEN REALLY..

Elegantspiker:
Don't spoil the show, Just type 'seen' when you've spotted whats in the picture.

Azazyel:
Ogbeni calm down. Why all the harsh words? You're proud enough to tell us how you sleep with married woman. I'm sure you're even exaggerating everything. People wey dey do am no dey too make noise

kpompey:
U are close to your grave.