₦airaland Forum

@poster

The good guys don’t come on a platter of Gold my dear.
You need to do a self criticism and ask yourself some rare questions, do you really deserve a good guy?
Are you good yourself?
Nothing good comes easy, work on packaging yourself and your ways.

What if the guy is only playing the fool for her.
Probably he knows about her two ex-husbands and all the many lovers she has had in the past.
I mean which right thinking man wouldn't?
If not from info from close quaters then through sleeping with her.
Abi, even with all the proper techniques (exercise and all) in use these days how won't i detect that am probably the 99th constant visitor to her haven.
It's left to my guy to decide what he wants jare!

Besides the mileage and age of the car that i don,t know about, a friend sold something similar recently for 470k.
Whats your own price gaskiya?

Did you receive sms or email alerts for the withdrawals from your bank?
I was debited recently for a transaction i entered online (Ever heard of pinreload.com) and until i received an email from my bank i'd forgotten i paid for that service.
Meanwhile, i'm still thinking its a scam cos i've not got what i paid for five days after.
My ATM card has also not dispensed cash since then, could pinreload.com have emptied my account?

She is pretty, but not versatile, she just doesn't know how to work it, she has height, beauty but it all doesn't come together somehow, surprised she has lasted this long

@Nnekie
There goes the Nigerian in you, your fellow Nigerian was about making the country proud in her own little way and all you could offer is slander.

if she's yoruba i won't be surprised that he talks like a market woman at times. some yoruba gals are like that. abeg no offense o

@buttercop
I wonder when the likes of you will sway into extinction.
Do you have to keep reminding us that we are of different ethnic backgrounds,cultural beliefs and that we are seperated by border lines?
Utterances like yours earn very stiff penalties in the outside world.
Infact,it shows alot about the kind of education you have.

.

All are nice parts of Abuja.
How come nobody has posted the other side of Abuja?
I mean the sorry sights; Mpape, Yan-yan,Maraba,Lugbe,Kubwa,lifecamp etc.
Am sure El-rufai would have made a haven of those places if he had another four years.

Igwe.:

No hassle in my job, it's somehow predictable. One only needs to utilize his chances with rich politicians.

@Igwe
Political thuggery you mean?

Do you enjoy your present job?
Do you wake up happy and run off to work?
Do you earn enough to make ends meet?
Do you have to cut corners before your salary comes?
What would you rather be doing if not your present job?
Have you ever considered quittiing and going into business?

the list is endless.
What are your answers to these question, lets SHARE EXPERIENCES.

Definately the hijab is a sacred material (or should be).
However, not all those who use it can be regarded as pure.

I'll soon stop using phones because of the amount of money I give to MTN in d name of buyin recharge cards

True talk!

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PapaBrowne:
Costs aside, there a a nasty Federal law that would hamper any development.

Federal law demands that any power generated should be pumped into the national grid.
SO even if Fashola builds a 10,000 MW power plant, he has to pump it into the national grid for Zamfara, Ebonyi, Ekiti and all other states in the Fedeartion to share. Lagos would probably end up with 2000 MW.
Now, who would want to make that kind of investment when the benefits are not going to impact your people.

That is the mess that is Nigeria!

With all the power outage experience here in Lagos, all the bureucracy surrounding power generation won't count if the right measures are taken.
Consider population for instance,i wonder how we get bye at times despite the living conditions and without electricity.

Having to survive the very heavy traffic to and from work and a shocker awaiting your arrival, NO LIGHT!
The noise from the generating set not withstanding,you watch TV but can't use the airconditioner.
You risk loosing your generator to the power of your pressing iron just so you can straighten one shirt for work the next day.
Your small business groans under the weight of constant power outtage and dependence on gasoline.

The centre of excellence cannot continue to depend on or feed the rest of the nation with electricity.
Call it immunity or anything you like, Lagos state should be exempted from this electricity law or the worst is lurking around the corner.

Wonder if the Honorable Governor can ease up on constructing bus stops and buying air-conditioned buses for a while.

I’ve not seen so much cement and concrete since the days of Lateef Jakande.
No doubt, we all appreciate the development; we appreciate what Oshodi has become and the new Lagos in general.

I however think electricity supply is one bane that affects the lives of every Nigerian to the marrows.
If PHCN is seemingly unrepentant despite all the money that has gone into revitalizing it can’t we discard it for Yar-adua to nurse?

If Lagos intends to achieve the much talked about mega status, adopting an alternative power supply will go a long way in helping to achieve this.

What do you think, which do you, prefer?
BRT or thermal power plants?

How come we don’t seem proactive enough in this country.
Our businesses are mostly services that are foreign related or oil and gas related.
We are still living in the triumph of the oil boom of the late 70s.

It's so rare to come by smart business ideas these days, especiall coming from young people.
Yet, we modify the ideas of others and turn them into money spinning machines.

No wonder even the prestigious Lagos business school avoids small business in its curricullum like a plague.
One is left to wonder if this young black society isn't home to half-baked idealists, misfits and white collar salary slaves.

Is it that we don't have people with good business sense and acumen?
Who can think of something small and lucrative.
Let’s put you to test!

Has anybody heard of the Ugwumba foundation in affiliation with the Enugu state University of technology, ESUT?
Please provide me with all information at your disposal as to the authencity of this body.

olanajim:
Mybal,
while I like this idea of holding muslims gathering, I quite disagree with you about part of your comment regarding talking to non muslims online. There is nothing wrong with talking to non muslims whether online or offline. The reason muslims are grossly misunderstood has to do with the fact that the non muslims are basically uninformed. (except the diehard anti Islam elements)

I have always been a part of such gathering in the past, but stopped when I find out that some of them are becoming breeding ground for bidha and foundamentalism. I have since stop attending them altogether! Not that I won't like to attend, but if what I saw during those days are still rampant, then, I am going to remain where I am.

That does not mean I am discouraging anyone. In fact, I recommends it.

My point is that muslims should heed the sunnah when applying their faiths,

@olanajim
I don't think keeping away from the Umah is the solution, Bidah or no bidah.
I wonder how you'll get to make corrections when such situations arise.

Mind you,your silence might lead some ignorant muslims astray.
The Prophet said in his books that a muslim owes a responsibility to his fellow muslim to trail the right path.
If you are so sure that those gatherings are breeding grounds for bidah, its your responsibility to give your own advise at intervals and ensure the sunnah prevails over innovations.

zayhal:
@poster

Did you visit the places I suggested? How was it?

Thanks!
I visited the mosque last weekend.
Just what i need.
I'm yet to check on the Ustaz though.
Jazakum!

zayhal:
Go to AbdulAzeez foundation mosque, a very big and popular mosque in Egbeda. Good lectures, halqa, tafseer, jujm'ah are held there.
You can also ask for the home address of Sheik Najimdeen Sulayman. He lives in Egbeda and holds lectures for brothers and sisters on Sundays. He preaches pure sunnah.
Another good place is 5, Laggar street, Iyana-Ipaja, Alimosho bus stop. classes are held for brothers and sisters at designated days and times of the week to suit individuals' schedule.

Salam Alaiykum,
Jazakum!
Thanks for the information.
Maybe i should have reached out to you at first.
I forgot you know my environs like the palm of your hand.
How are my babies?

This one is a wagon and its windscreen is cracked.
Do you think i can get a new windscreen here in Lagos?

How come my guy didn't replace the windshield all this while.
One thing about cars is that you'll never know the truth about them till you start driving them to the mechanics.

For how much would you sell yours if you wanted to part with it?
How old is it?

Asalam alaiykum waramatullai wabarakatuhu!
Brothers and sisters in islam,
I think its high time we started sharing ideas on how and where to perfom acts of Ibadah online.

Most of us are salary earners,civil servants,businessmen and women,students who hardly have time to perform the five daily compulsory solat at their appropriate time.
We even find it difficult to do nofilats in the midnight or early parts of the morning.
We don't see it as shameful the fact that we cannot read the Holy Quran in Arabic talk more of making out time to recite it.

There are several centres around us where we can visit and build a strong spiritual life where we can learn new things about Islam and increase our Iman instead of engaging in unprofitable arguments with non muslims online.

I stay in the Egbeda area of Lagos but when am home every weekend, i find it difficult to associate with other muslims except during solat.
I'd appreciate if i could meet with like minded people with whom we could engage in "Maslahah".

Lets start exchanging the addresses of such centres or avenues via this thread.
Don't keep quiet, be the first to perfom this act of Ibadah.

May Allah enrich us in Iman and grant us Al-Jannah but protect us from the acursed Shaytan and the fire of Jahannam.

Is the Daewoo nubira a car for the nigerian roads?
Has anybody used it before and what are the liely problems one can encounter through wear and tear?
A friend brought it from the US and wants to sell it at a price higher than its actual value, what do you think?

What are the likely problems of the car and where can one get the parts in Lagos?

Your story was exactly my story as a little boy. Alhamdulillah, my mother became Muslim woman, in her old age. The same story is what happens with my boys; they were always happy to make salah with me. I hope their mom becomes muslim through them before she dies. She is a good mother to them.

@ olabowale
And what has become of your boys now Bros Olabowale?
Do they still say their Salat and practise iSLAM?
No harm intended oh just want to learn.

There should not be a reason for a muslim man to ignore a muslim woman, and look elsewhere for a non-muslim woman. I hope that the muslim man knows that the wrapping is beautiful. The unwrapping is part of the exitement and pre-intimacy.

@olabowale
What if you don't seem to have all you need in a muslim woman and you find peace in the arms of a christian woman just like you did in your first marriage Sir?

olabowale:
@SeanT21:« #9 on: Yesterday at 08:14:37 AM »
And ends up in hell fire? Thats not a good thing. The woman should be invited to what is good; Islam.
I would think that anyone with good head on her shoulder will want good, and shun bad.

@ Barakah
Seems you've been pronounced a 'kafir' and won't therefore make Al-Janah.
I think you better retrace your steps and seek Allah's face first.
Whats in a woman anyway.
If you want some very candid advice which i know will help you, just get in touch with me lets talk offline.

ayinba1:
@poster

your decison to consider (seriously) marrying a non muslim is more related to your level of deen, if i may put it that way.
What is your definition of a succesful marriage?

A good respectful loving wife wonderful smart children, a stable home? Is there muslim or Islamic in your definition? If yes, then make the foundation so and that starts with you. There are homes that have one muslim parent and one christian parent with christian children and they all seem happy, and vice versa.

There are homes that started out as 2 muslim parents, one became non muslim, children followed or not;

so really, the answer is primarily going to be defined by what you cinsider a successful marriage.

I wish you well.

True talk!

I however don't agree that religion has anything to do with marriage ( at least not until recently).
Uniformity is important here and it helps the easy sail of the "family ship".

I wish i was in your shoes though, its "piece of cake" compared to the experience some of us have to share.

Since nobody seems to to want to contribute to this thread, i think i'll go ahead and provide all available information on the topic.

Marriage is an important part of a Muslim’s life and, it starts with choosing the right partner.
When it comes to life decisions, choosing your spouse is among the most important ones you will ever make. It is a decision that will have a major impact, not only on your life, but also on your future wife and those who are close to you.

Marriage completes half your Islam. It is a sacred contract in the presence of Allah that compels you to make commitments never before asked of you, whether you are male or female.

Don’t expect perfection – No one is perfect. Your future husband or wife may have model good looks, PhDs and high Imaan, but there will be flaws that you won’t spot until after you are married.

The Engagement

In many parts of the Muslim world, the engagement marks the day in which the two sides agree for their daughter and son to eventually get married.

It is a day of celebration with relatives and guests from both parties gathered in a single place to feast and get to know each other.

However, getting engaged as understood in Western society is alien to Islam. In reality, there is no true engagement process in Islam, with men and women being encouraged to get married as soon as possible once both parties agree.

Because of this, many cultures actually combine the engagement with the nikah, which means the man and woman become husband and wife immediately under the eyes of Allah.

This solves many problems for the groom and bride, who may not be able get married officially for various reasons, be it education, financial considerations or other practical issues.

For instance, in many Muslim societies, it is frowned upon for unmarried couples to fraternize in public, even if it is only holding hands.

This is overcome by conducting the nikah on engagement day, as long as both parties agree that cohabitation would only take place once the marriage is officially registered.

In any case, the engagement process begins with the two families and their guests enjoying a function to formally accept the union.

During this time, they may decide on a date for marriage. Quite often, the date would not be finalized until much later, especially if either one of the fiancés are studying or looking for employment.


The groom’s contingent arrives and a male leader of the delegation, usually the father, will utter words to the bride’s male guardian as a formal marriage proposal. The two sides then sit down and discuss the mahr, or dowry, that the husband pays to the wife.

Once this is agreed upon, the couple is officially engaged.

The Nikah process

The nikah is sacred and special ceremony that binds a man and a woman together as husband and wife under the eyes of Allah.

It is a simple process that involves a contract between the husband and wife. Once agreeing to the contract, both parties must do their utmost to fulfill their duties to each other, to Allah (swt) and to their kith and kin.

The laws in many Muslim countries these days requires the nikah to be conducted by a recognized official, be it an imam or registrar. This is to safeguard the legal validity of the marriage and to make sure the proper paperwork is issued.

For a nikah to be valid, there are some conditions that must be fulfilled.

The woman has to agree to the marriage. Some practices call for the woman to be asked if she agrees to marry a certain man. She should say “yes” or keep silent, which implies agreement. A woman cannot be forced to marry anyone.


Guardian – A nikah is not valid without the consent of a male guardian, or wallee. This is usually the woman’s father, or it can be any male mahram. If no wallee can be found, the imam can act on the woman’s behalf.


Two witnesses – Two trustworthy witnesses, generally males, must attest to the nikah. Some Muslim societies require two witnesses each from the groom and bride’s sides in addition to two unrelated witnesses, making six in all.




Mahr – the groom’s side must offer a certain amount of mahr, or dowry. This could be in the form of cash, jewelry or other items of value, as long as the bridge agrees. The mahr does not have to be physically handed over to the woman at this stage but a contract of intent must be sealed for the marriage to be valid,
Muslims should know that it is not compulsory for a imam to be present at a nikah for it to be valid in the eyes of Allah.

However, to adhere to specific country laws, you may be required to have an official of the mosque or marriage registrar present to legally verify the union.

Another aspect of the nikah is that it is not essential for the bride to be present at the ceremony. Many societies perform the nikah at the masjid with only the men presebt while the women stay at home.

What is required is for the wallee to give away the bride in front of two witnesses, and afterwards, the bride’s agreement is sought.

Other cultures organize big functions where relatives and guests of both husband and wife are present, with the nikah performed in front of everyone in a grand ceremony.


The Wedding Day (Walima)

The walima is a wedding feast aimed at letting the community know that this particular couple is now husband and wife. In societies where people adhere to Islamic guidelines, this is very important because married couples must be allowed to be together in public without arousing suspicion as to their marital status.

There are differences of opinion among scholars on the timing of the walima – wether it should be part of the nikah ceremony, after nikah but before consummation or after consummation.

Salam alaiykum waramatullah wabarakatuh.
Brothers and sisters in Islam!
Can anyone please provide answers to these questions on Nikkah?
What is expected of a man who wants to take a woman's hand in marriage,
from the stage of getting her consent to the "AKDUL" and the NIKKAH ceremony.

Most of the wedding ceremonies(NIKKAH)  i've seen in recent times are filled with lots of glamour and Glitterati.
Is it in line with Islamic stipulations to show extravagance while tying the knot?

Can anyone please educate us on this topic with Quranic and hadith quotations.

And those who say:

"Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes,and make us leaders for the Muttaqûn"

Those will be rewarded with the highest place(in Paradise) because of their patience.

Therein they shall be met with greetings and the word of peace and respect.(Qur'an 25:74-75)

While observing Solat alone, if i make a mistake by:-

(1) Adding or subtracting from the number of required rakats or
(2) forgot to sit after the second rakaat
(3) or am in doubt about having added to, or subtracted from the required number of rakats
I know am expected to validate my salat with sajdah before or after tashahud depending on the situation.

How do i go about this?
What is this sajdah called?
Which sajdah is used to correct a doubt, addition or subtraction to solat?

olabowale:
@Mybad: « #31 on: Yesterday at 08:15:56 PM »
It will now be my responsibility to encourage her to grow her hair Long enough for the beautifiation of her face, and my excitement.

Real mature talk my brother, JazakumuLlah khairan katheera!

olabowale:
But actually, as the obedience to the commandment of Allah and the Messenger (AS).

This is new to me!

congoshine:
All he needs is the face and getting to know her character which is poosible without unveiling. Although that will be very difficult for me. . . . . . . but we're all different !

@congoshine
Why not go ahead and tell us what you'll prefer or how much you'll want to see in your woman?

Nimshi:
Well done!
.

congoshine:
thank you

@Nimshi & congoshine
Don't tell me you two are congratulating each other over sharing thesame opinion on this topic.

olabowale:
@Zayhal and others: Salaamualaykum wa rahmatullahi Ta ala wa barakatuh. Below is an excerpt from the writing of Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi on behavior of believing women and their future husband.

I think every line of this writing deserves to be read.


Seeing the Woman to Whom One Proposes Marriage.

It is permissible for a Muslim man to see the woman to whom he intends to propose , b]

@olabowale
I agree that all the quoted Hadith are of the Noble prophet.
I however disagree that all of them can be entirely adhered to.
These are the teachings of the most perfect of Allah's creatures and i wonder who can ever match his ways.

Perfection can be aimed at but i don't think it can be attained by "us".
Besides,i wonder how many of us followed the afore mentioned rules while choosing his bride.
I don't know how you did it in your time but i still stand a good chance of going by the sunnah in my time cos i've not taken my bride.