₦airaland Forum

Hospital Stay

A man was brought to Mercy Hospital, and went in for coronary surgery.

The operation went well, and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy waiting by his bed.

"Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," the nun said while patting his hand. "We do have to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?"

"No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.

"Can you pay in cash?"

"I'm afraid I can't, Sister."

"Do you have any close relatives, then?"

"Just my sister in New Mexico," replied, "but she's a spinster nun."

"Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God."

"Okay," the man said with a smile, "then bill my brother-in-law."





Darla's Doctors Visit

A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor.

The doctor says, "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?"

The mother says, "It's my daughter Darla. She keeps getting these cravings, she's putting on weight, and is sick most mornings."

The doctor gives Darla a good examination, then turns to the mother and says, "Well, I don't know how to tell you this, but your Darla is pregnant - about 4 months, would be my guess."

The mother says, "Pregnant?! She can't be, she has never ever been left alone with a man! Have you, Darla?"

Darla says, "No mother! I've never even kissed a man!"

The doctor walked over to the window and just stares out of it.

About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, "Is there something wrong out there doctor?"

The doctor replies, "No, not really, it's just that the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill. I'll be darned if I'm going to miss it this time!"

Yes



Do you know Omo Kero?

Mischievous Boys

A couple had two little boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that, if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons were probably involved.

They boys' mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The clergyman agreed, but asked to see them individually. So the mother sent her 8-year-old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the clergyman in the afternoon.

The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?".

They boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with his mouth hanging open, wide-eyed. So the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God!!?" Again the boy made no attempt to answer. So the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "WHERE IS GOD!?"

The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, "What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time, dude. God is missing - and they think WE did it!"

No, I'm not stupid


Do you think martian chics will be more sexy than earth chics?

Nice one dude. Now is time to laugh back at Math's face w/out worries. Maths

Supply him with a base in case he's gonna need when hangin out with Acid

somze:
Ask him which one is it Nella, Acid or . . .

Well, how am i supposed to know when all of them have no pics in their profile

Hey Hey, we will like a vampire pic in ur profile. But we dont want any vampire pic. We want YOUR vampire pic. So, upload dear.

Acid Rain in Numbers. I need to activate Neo mode to understand wat that triangle means

will hang around where she hangs out

Infinite 5

You wont see my downfall



Have you ever caused someone's downfall?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Walt Whitman: Biography

Pascal Triangle? You want to teach me maths? Or is that Babalawo International Pyramid @ Evil Forest dot Nigeria?
Abi ur boo's name is Pascal

Smigul

Yesterday handed over the baton to today to continue the race



Do you think u will see the end of today?

Tell him wat he probably needs is WITadol extra

Will work on it. But wait ooo, u mean i shud add my pic to ur profile? Now dats gonna be one funny sh*t. Or do u mean u want me to "Vampirise" ur own pic? If dats the case, i guess i'll be needing ur pic.

Commencing Operation Scatter all Jazz

@Mishoo
I guess penfold is trying to compose a new hit song. Dont worry, looks like u'll be the star afterall

bigbaby:
i do . am just saying the picture looks scary

This one i never even start be that. I was thinking of adding a vampire teeth and some more gore in the bg. Hope u can handle that.
But wait, where's urs._{Hell, even if u no too fine, bring make we work on top am}
Abi na ur afro_{when viewed under the microscope} u dey display?

GBAM!!! Case closed. Area Fada don land

Hi pips

Bigbaby appreciates my work. _{Jaybaby spreads lies about my girlfriend like she knows her}

Watz with me and "___Babyz"

10x Bigbaby

My Camera is rolling quiet frantically. Looks like i'll cash in a lotta dough in the banks with the Part 6 of the movie "Bum Blaster: The Return of The Black-Clothesman" Nollywood watch out for another BumBuster BlockBumster _{English? chei} BlockBuster Movie Home Video

@ Mimiko
Just thot we needed a love angle. Care to be our heroine? Dont worry, nobody will bum you.

But seriously, why be say Naija no get blondes. Our own version of blondes for wowo pass.

Am I supposed to answer that question?

Want to get under her Umbrella where umbnella is chilling

2 days back


wwtlt you were behind bars?

Salamun Alaikum Warahmatullahi Ta'ala Wa Barkatuhu Ya Ayyuhal Muslimin

Just want to congratulate Muslims all over the world for being alive to herald yet another month of blessings from Allah. I pray Allah affords us the strength, the vigour, the zeal to practice the ways of the Prophet (SAW) this holy month and shun all acts of evil

Ramadan Mubarak

Dont be caught off-guard

When u find yourself in a situation caused by a terrorist attack, pls observe the following safety points

Note: This is actually a mockery of a US Government site for the above purpose. Enjoy plz

Chocolate

somze:
Ninja, Pen
Shut up your face

Mishooo
I know sabe wetin that one mean o

Dude, we are waxing ur elbows with more grease and u r fretting. Naija people sef. Dem no dey ever welcome beta tin