₦airaland Forum

Mr Aboki: Hahahahahahaa..

I know your type.. You keep blaming the abject poverty in your family on fate, government, rich people and everything else except your lazy acursed family..

Dude, I paid my way through school.. I and my family work hard to ensure that we stay above your family on the food chain of life.. I don't even know why you are bothered about ASUU strike.. Its been destined that your entire family tree will be below the poverty line till your family tree withers away.. Your children and childrens children will serve me and my generation.. Its not a curse, its just the way it is meant to be.. Bosses and biitches.. Rich people like me need poor poeple like you to have haters and people who look up to us..

Go blame your father for your status in life instead of focusing on those people that are so higher than you that they consider your type inconsequential. #poverty stricken wretched bastrad son of a lazy under achieving nonentity that calls himself a father..

Go and castrate yourself and all males in your family cos that the only way you can ever stop the poverty curse that is engraved in your DNA..

You notice I didn't mention your mother.. Why blame a poor woman who was so unfortunate to be fertilized by a bastard from a linage of bastards that should have all been killed off by natural selection


Shege danbanza!!

You're a real hausa man. Speechless!

How to light a joint.
First and foremost, check the quality of the
wrapper. It should be soft and smooth. Selecting
a wrapper shouldn't be problem if you're
meticulous. So by now, your grass is already well
squash, mildly. You can google how to wrap a
joint cause many styles exist. So that's it for the
wrapping, let's focus on the ignition!
Hold the end of the joint i.e. the end you'll light.
This is usually the bigger and more attractive side
of the joint. So hold the end tight and shake
mildly. You see, the grass is a fragile species so
you have to touch it gently. You have to caress
and tickle it until it gives way. So you hold the tip
and shake lightly such that the whole joint
gradually begins to gain density. You need to do
this to make the joint burn slowly and in the
process releasing some heavenly flavours.
If you've shaken the tip well, you'll notice some
additional space at the end of the joint. Roll this
space tight, gentle again, and cut off with the tip
of your canine. Okay, that's the set of teeth by the
side of your mouth. Put your lighter, match stick,
car lighter and in some rare cases smoulding
charcoal from my aboki's suya fire, whatever fire,
put just at the tip and light slowly. Don't inhale
the first two puffs but rather blow gentle and take
in some air but don't swallow. Exhale. Just make
sure your action drags enough air make to make
your blowing reaction spark an internal fire in the
joint.
*Interlude: Please if by now you think I'm
referring to sex or a lady, well yes, you're wrong.*
After giving sufficient internal light to the joint, sit
tight and puff your joint. Don't pass, just puff,
puff, puff!
#Mosco chilling#

Top gunz in FG and greedy bigots in ASUU have sold their futures to US and souls to the devil. They are ruthlessly sniffing out the poor and enriching a few extremely elite nonentities.

Just work hard and smart. Whatever your hands find to do, do it diligently with all sincerity. Stay focused and believe in an Almighty Supreme Being. We are not alone in this world, however with the right values, focus and persistence, we can "rise and rise again, until lambs become lions".

valicious1: I no nid upload my girlfriend pix bt I sure say no mata hw she dey ur mama no fine reach am

Come on guys, don't do this. Please, let's keep it clean.

nasonaso: rubbish must you MARRY LEPA. I LIKE DEM BIG

You must be Gordons!

[quote author=][/quote]It would appear that things have come to a head between President Goodluck Jonathan and former President Olusegun Obasanjo.

According to Premium Times Nigeria, President Jonathan has vehemently accused Obasanjo of being behind the ongoing PDP crisis. As he was quoted as saying, “Obasanjo created the problem; he should go and solve it.”

He said this during a reconciliation meeting held a day after former Vice President Atiku Abukabar and seven state governors – amidst other top members of the party – stormed out of the PDP national convention and formed their own breakaway party.

According to sources present at the meeting, President Jonathan was furious and said that there were opposing forces within the party bent on blackmailing him so he submits to their whims. It was after saying this that he was reported to have stood up from his seat and angrily walked off, saying he was no longer interested in the reconciliation talks, and that Obasanjo – who, according to the President, caused the whole mess in the first place – should handle the problem.

In response to requests that he terminate his re-election ambitions, President Goodluck Jonathan has said that he refuses to lay down his rights to vote and be voted for.[/quote]

dont8: Never heard or seen this animals before, hope they are protected and kept from going into extintion soon.



1. Wildebeests - Also known as the gnu, wildebeests are found on the grassy plains and woodlands of Southern, Central, and Eastern Africa. They are antelopes with hooves and you can find them while visiting the Serengeti National Park.
- Also known as the gnu, wildebeests are found on the grassy plains and woodlands of Southern, Central, and Eastern Africa. They are antelopes with hooves and you can find them while visiting the Serengeti National Park.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/wildebeest1.jpg


2. Blue Monkeys - Only a little hair on their faces give these monkeys a blue pigment and they are usually found in Central or East Africa. They eat fruits and leaves.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/blue-monkey1.jpg


3. African gray parrot - Referred to by some as the smartest bird in the world, African gray parrot can learn hundreds of words and sounds, eats seeds, berries, nuts and fruit, and lives in the central and western parts of Africa.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/gray-parrot.jpg


4. Lemur - A wailing scream, pointed ears and large reflective eyes are characteristics of the lemur, a native to Madagascar.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/lemur1.jpg


5. Mandrill - The world’s largest monkey, the mandrill lives in Western Central Africa, Southern Cameroon, Gabon and the Congo. It has a red nose and cheeks that are blue with purple grooves on each side.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/mandrill1.jpg


6. Pangolin - Pangolins are anteaters with no teeth, long sticky tongues and large scales that transform into a coat of armor for a rolled-up way of protection.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/pangolin1.jpg


7. Bushbaby - Night monkeys of Africa, bushbabies are also named the galago. They are very small with excellent hearing and vision and feed on insects, fruits, tree gum and smaller animals.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/bushbaby.jpg


8. Elephant shrew - Officially classified as the Cape elephant shrew, these are not rodents. They have five toes and long noses.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/elephant-shrew1.jpg


9. Aardvark - Living in dry or wet climates, the nocturnal aardvark is found all over Africa. It has poor eyesight, a long sticky tongue and large powerful claws for digging up termites.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/aardvark1.jpg


10. Genet - Carnivores that use an odor to mark their territories, genets are nocturnal and found exclusively in Africa.

https://cdn.afkinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/genet1.jpg


http://afkinsider.com/2126/10-of-the-strangest-animals-found-in-africa/10/

Thanks to my kind of work, I've seen all these animals live!

[quote author=Yoshi-Master]I was driving today in Lagos, and was held up in traffic. In every traffic jam I find myself in, I always try to analyze the situation to get down to the root cause.

The initial slow moving traffic on Lekki-Expressway while I was driving wasn't that bad, until of course some Nigerians started forming extra lanes to bypass the slow moving traffic, that would have dissipated on its own.

So now the 3 lane road was turned into a six lane road, that is not 4, not 5, but 6 lanes.

Why are Nigerians such psychos sometimes? Why can't some people just wait and not make a bad situation worse?

I even saw a police van taking the bush path which formed the sixth lane, all I could do was SMH.

Why can't we enforce simple law and order? Even in the small things like traffic. Its not like this requires huge amounts of money for infrastructure, its just a matter of the enforcers doing their work.[/quote]When I saw Nigeria, I thought you were going to give examples from at least 5 other cities apart from Lagos. Assuming what driving in Lagos is same everywhere in Nigeria! SMH

gbosaa: ....Second pix looks hideous....yuckkk.


If half of kpomo in the third pix was invested properly,Nigeria wld be a global giant in leather goods.

Its unfortunate that most of Naijas finest hides ends in the cooking pots while we keep importing faux leather goods from china.

story! We lem tight here!

I'll start with myself:
NOIBMUUL

edwardjr: she was my classmate in high school by den we neva knew each other until we met in d university. We became best of frndz dat even her frndz used 2 tel her dat we were compartible n dat she shud go into an affair wit me...it turned out dat in her year 3 my departmental guy dis flowered her n shortly dia relatnshp crashed. I became her shoulder 2 cry on til we startd an affair due 2 our constant closeness n d topic we regularly discussed. She is a decent gal,God fearing,infact a 'virtuous woman'bt i jus dnt love her to d point of marriage. Her romantic style doesnt suit or click wit mine.even wen she asked me where we r heading 2, i had 2 tel her plainly dat we r jus frndz. because of how most ladies r i'm afraid if i might meet som1 lik her again if i let her go. Bt how can i luv her to d extent of marrying her? Pls advice

Say the truth and shame the devil. The reason you don't like/love her to marry is because you know a sharp guy that disvirgined her. Shikenah!

jmoore: @op, not all men are after premarital sex.
I won't find it hard to get a virgin to marry

Hope you've found a virgin cos if not, I suggest you get out of here and get one fast! Cos d way boys are bursting anything now, ehnn, na only God know oh!

Princessmel: My point exactly! How can one get married a Virgin if they don't have a boyfriend to begin with, are they supposed to marry dust? And the boyfriends they now have keep demanding sex?

Na you still know ooo!

Princessmel: So most guys want to marry a virgin, but can someone explain to me how this is possible when all guys in a relationship want sexx?! And the first stage before marriage is being in a relationship which will ultimately lead to sexx?!

Na you know oh!

Most Nairaland uses think their ID name is anonymous and nobody knows who they are. I can bet a few people know that you're that female blogger, that controversial actress or that young millionaire musician or that infamous politician.

Let's try this out. Type your nairaland ID name and you'll be shocked that someone will tell you exactly who you are.

Who goes first?

UNIXLover: Hello Guys...Ok,I currently work for an IT consulting firm as an Application Development/Support.I have a total of 3 years working experience in IT and some Certifications.Now,I have always wanted to do my Masters in the Us and i have been taking some steps as regards that in the last few months.I will be writing the GRE exams in few weeks.would you guys advise i quit this Job for Msc? what are the chances of getting a job in the Us? I currently earn more than 200k In Nigeria.But anything that makes me forfeit this Msc Plans now means i will be focusing on Marriage plans Next(But i really wish i have my Msc in the Us ).

Will it be a worthwhile Move?
I am currently Looking at Msc In Information Systems/Technology.
Also,If i will be getting funding from schools(Or GA)will you guys still advise i Move?

Contributions are highly appreciated.

I sincerely don't think you should quit your job for MSc in the states. However, I will readily advice you to quit it to setup your own firm based on the assumption that MSc is not a criteria to successfully run an IT firm. I've a colleague that runs an IT company with just BSc and he didn't even study any IT related course. Point is some field of endeavour don't require any PG to run while it's a prerequisite for others. For example I'm already planning to quit my job for a MSc in Europe not because I'm not there yet but because I will be better positioned when I'm through (e.g. the course comes with a 6-month internship with a reputable international organization). So the bottom line is this, if you feel comfy that the MSc will better position you, then go ahead with it but keep your eyes fixed on your own establishment.

Well done to you and more grace to attain greater heights.

Seun.

Can't you all see they want to rip and bring this boy down!?

The purchase of Neymar from Santos, the tax evasion mess and now this, com' on!!!

Lion' Messi for life jor!

Mudley313: That is a blue whale; not a fish, but a mammal...OP get an education

Dat is not a blue whale mr professor.

@OP
The wild yam is verily available in IITA in Ibadan.

@all
Guy please, that video was scripted. it was just acting.

Men lie a lot. In fact, lying is like a second language for men but women tell the biggest lies. For example, the baby is yours; he's my daddy's friend; I want to remain celibate until marriage.

I had an area code (friend without benefit) once and although I knew she was a runs girl (olosho, aristo etc), she claimed the contrary. But anytime we sleep together she's always insistent on money for hair, money for provisions/food stuffs etc. Who's fooling who?

Prostitution in 4th dimension. Posting provocative pictures to lure randy old gluttons. Soon they'll get married and exquisite cars and luxurious wedding celebration will be sponsored by the same senile frogs that have denied their people the opportunity to be patriotic.

infoscope: You must be a proud brat.. As of now MTN foundation scholarship is the highest paying at 200,000 per session. NLNG is 100k and shell is 75k, so you need to tell me how you came up with such inflated figures. BTW you are not supposed to be in more than one scholarship. What's your full name?

Oga FBI, abeg dress commot!

Symphony007: Hey guys. My girlfriend and i have been dating for a while and we are in the university.

She is a genius, i'm not dull but slightly lazy and rhusty in some courses.

Since we started dating. She took it upon herself to tutor me.

Forced me to go to night classes and read, supervise all my assignments. And surprisingly i improved greatly and i sat for NLNG and SHELL scholarship.

At the end shockingly. My name came out and today i am getting 300 thousand from LNG per session and 200,000 from shell. So plus the money i get from my parents.

My account is chilling but now my girlfriend is asking me to share all my financial data with her, from ATM pins to account details and investments.

It's really bothering me cause i don't think it's right but yet i don't want to seem ungrateful. My friends have told me not to try it.

Now i am not stingy, i buy her gifts and take her on expensive dinners. But why does she want those details and do you think i should trust her and give her?

Men!!! SMH
If you can allow her tutor you to academic success, why not allow her tutor you to financial success? Or at worst, she go chop your money with you, which isn't a bad idea AT ALL, AT ALL, considering she helped you up.

Recognise a help-meet when you see one mate. Good luck.

Obinoscopy: Nice one OP!

Mine: 26-30

This is the most dominant age. You can tell by the number of likes.

[quote author=Texas.Cowgirl]Thought I saw Adeboye

From babymama to Pastor's wife, omo see levelzzz

Started from the bottom.....[/quote]....Now we on top!