₦airaland Forum

victooman:
God forbid bro,, the previous compound taught me a lot of lessons,, this ones are just pushing me to see my limit and they will definitely get it,, is like women feel insulted when been ignored,is annoying bro

Since you are starving them of your attention, be ready to receive constant gossip and provocation.

Maggi85
Do not forget. If you think your baby daddy cannot devote or gives you what you want from a man, please feel free to let go of him.

Take Care.

Maggi85:
Unfortunately he didnt give me his word that he wlll support me more after another child. He said «you should have known that i didnt have money as a foreigner (but with masters..) when you got pregnant with our first child».

I replied him. «Well i expeced, and also you, that a good job would come your way after a master in engineer». «And now that you have a job its still difficult for you to contribute». He didnt reply me well after that. Just many excuses. My main worry and reason why im afraid he is using me is 1. not wanting to contribute much financially without me forcing a lot. 2. not joining me and our daughter on things like family dinners, playground, friends meetings, cabin with family, vacation, walking outside with our daughter, playing with her. 3. too much focus on sex. He wants sex two times a day when we a 2 year old, its like its only sex he wants from me. 4. he doesnt want me to join him in church, but he takes our daughter there. He says that the reason is that he thinks my agenda to go there is not God but to check on him or see if he meet others. In a way he is also right. Im not agreed to much that his church follow. We are not married, still he has a leader position in the church. That makes me Wonder a bit. Because i have read that in this church you have to be married to do so. Two weeks ago he asked if maybe we should get married this year. Well im still comfused about this guy, and we barely see each other since he works so much, and my daughter doesnt care much about him these days since he is never home.

He works all the time, dont give us much time or money, dont take me to church but want another baby with me and also talk about marriage, never join me on visits to my family, never do familythings together with me and our daughter, use his whole weekend on job snd church but doesnt welcome me there.

So whats in this for me. Been patient for 2,5 years now since she was born. Im a patient woman so maybe i will wait even more, because i feel like if I break up with him i will never get together with him again. People will say; what is there to loose. But in fact i am afraid to loose him because we are a family of three, and i put family very high. I will never give up my family without a long fight.

Thanks four your good advices

Maggi
Do whatever you think that is best for you. I am sure you are a good woman/wife to be. May life treat you well.

Stay away from any cream made in Nigeria. If you love yourself, buy clear essence lotion. It is a foreign made complexion cream for all skin color.

Use detoil original soap.

Dripper4u:
I use GLUTA WHITE lotion and it has been making me fairer.

I also use it with skin doctor sun protector.

For now I use hawaii soap.

I'm looking for a new cream to start using, preferably one that won't make me darker.

Your recommendation will be appreciated
Thanks.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Why didn't you quote me directly? You scared of me?

You have made every nice man run from you, you are not becoming very bitter.

Maggi85:
Its good to hear different views. Thank you everyone for all the advices you give me. It helps a lot. I think you are the only one hear that has the view that he is not using me. All the others are hundred prosent sure he is using me. I am an intelligent woman, and i know whats going on. He earns money, but they go somewhere else than to us. Its not possible for me to find out unless i hire an investigator. Reason i dont leave him yet, is that im scared my daughter will loose him. Even though i didnt say it here, he is a playful and fun dad when he has a bit time for her. Its not often he has time, but its maybe in evenings he has time for her or when he is off work once in a while. Im afraid that he will be gone if i show him the door. And make familiy with someone else, never being with us again. I feel in a way that i have more control of the situation when he lives with us. But the talk about having another baby with him is not good, since he knows he doesnt contribute much in any ways. He talks about african classmates (Norwegian study class) that are always pregnant, and that Norwegian birth rate are so low, that his goal was never to only have one child.

I dont get him. First the talk about having more children. Then the talk that i should have known that he would not have a job when i got pregnant with the first baby. He was about to finish engineering masters at that time. Both of us said that he would of course get a good job, and he said he got good results. Now he refuse that he said anything about that. Of course when you start dating a guy that has much education in a field that has many Jobs in norway im optimistic about our future together. Then corona came. And then.. he got job this may. Only a job here and there, but its good money. Night shifts with extra payment and so on.

Since i like to buy clothes on sale, im often coming home with cheap clothes for me and my girl. He is always commenting «your mum is rich» to our daughter. Its like he says it on purpose so i will feel guilty asking him for money. He said last time i asked for the monthly payment : its only now i have money, but i havent earned much the last two years. So he is always finding excuses so i will not bothering him about asking. But this last time i got really angry. I said to him «where are the money going? You been working fulltime since may». He just tried to talk himself out of it, talking about the past bla bla. I was crying and shouting to him. After one day i got the money i asked for. So he had the money, just Wanted to make a big thing out of it first. But it shouldnt be like that. Im not suppose to fight to get money. He should give it freely and willingly. So my conclusion is also by now: he is using me. And i have to find a way to deal with the situation. Give him ultimatium, or just end it. In a way he doesnt deserve us.

Yes im 40 this year. He is 34. In norway its not like in Nigeria. A woman of 40 are still hot on the market here. People live as single in all ages, and few get married. Im not yet married, so i have good chance to find another man. Its not like «he is hot, but im not since im 40». It has a lot to say how well you take care of yourself. My man is young, but getting fatter. He doesnt exercise or taking good care of himself. I look at least 6 years younger than my age, and noone thinks i look like im 40 this year. Only problem is if you want more kids its good to get it before turning 43. So its good to make a decision soon. I still dont know what to do. I feel like i need proof that he is using me. What if he doesnt like you say, and i regret it later in life. The moment i show him out is the moment i will not see him much again. He is s very proud yoruba man. He will never come back if i break up with him. I guess i will see the truth if i push more. Tell him that either you give me 10 000 kr each month or you are out. If he works like now he has at least 30 000 each month. So 1/3 of income should be possible to give to his family in norway.

Another thing. I think there is something going on in his family in Nigeria too. His dad is a pastor. He congratulated me one time that my parents gave me away to his sone (engagement or marriage). I can see now that he has another account on Facebook that his parents are following, while his sisters and brothers has the normal account. He has hidden friendslist on Facebook. But i can se friends we have in common. Also they didnt make a big celebration for him on Facebook (showing pictures and saying nice things like all nigerians do) but they did for his brother, sister and everyone else. They didnt even congratulate him. Only his sister and brother did. I once hear him fight a lot with his mum. It was about money. But in yoruba. Understood parts of it. I felt like he was angry because they didnt send him money.

He visited Nigeria september last year. When he was there i never got snaps from the family, meals together with his family. It was very few pictures he shared. The church posted a lot, but nothing about that the pastor son came back to Nigeria after 4 years in norway. I feel like that is something the dad should been celebrating, that i would see hugs and so on. I dont know, there is something going on with his family but he doesnt say it.

His dad is a pastor of a big church! So many people. They always were beautiful clothes, always so much glam in the church. Dont you think this family have much money?
Why then have they not been giving my daughter anything since she was born? He came home from Nigeria with nothing to us. Only many clothes (he got it sewed there) for himself.

He talks about that we should go to Nigeria and that they wants to see her. In some way i dont believe it. I dont think he will do it in reality. Its just empty words. Maybe i should do it. Beg him to take us there. If he refuses he has to give me a good reason. Its plenty of reasons for me to not go with a 2 year old though, not the safest part of this planet. But maybe going to Nigeria would make it easy to make a decision about the future with or without him.

Your man need to save a lot of money to have a sure footing in his own life. You don't need proof from others that your man is using you. Those people giving advice here are bitter old hag of women. When a Nigeria man tells you he wants more children from you, it is a sign he has chosen you among all women to be the mother of his children. He sees no other woman in his life other than you.

Your man knows that you really love him and he sees no other woman other than you. He wants to marry you. You have to handle your man with patient and care. If you follow evil advice here and push him away, you will regret it all your life. I am a 31 years old guy and I know what I am talking about.

I know a Japanese single mother here on this forum who has been married to a Nigerian man for 17 years. Don't take the advice of this wicked people here and if you push your man away, he will surely walk away from you and not look back.

About his family, they have a lot of financial crisis your man will not want to share with you. He desire to take you to Nigeria to see his family, but Nigeria is not safe for even its citizen. Another thing I will tell you is that, he doesn't give you enough money because he feels you are financially good without him. I understand you need his emotional and financial support from him which is very good. You are not asking much from him. Yes he works a lot and sent money home. Don't push your man away, you will regret.

He has given you his word to support you more when you have another child for him. Talk to your baby daddy and tell him how you feel and what you want from him.

Maggi85

If you take the blind advice of this people you will regret it. He was alive before he met you, so your leaving him will not affect his life.

He will move on and find someone more better.

Mindlog:
Love fire! See boldness with which you are confidently lying!

Why not?
The guy has been in Norway before they start dating.

Maggi85

Your Nigeria man is not using you. The people here above are giving you bad advice.

Nigerians have this mentality that, when a black man is dating a white woman, he is using her for papers. Your Nigeria lover is not using you. He feels you are financially OK that is why he support you less. He loves you and wants to marry you because he sees no other woman in his life. He is not giving you that support because he still have to lay something back home. Every man needs to have a strong foundation.

Sit your man down and talk to him. Tell him your worries and how you feels. Communication is good.

May God keep strengthening you.

He is demon possess and prayer is affecting him

kyber:
He recently left to be independent
We are all Christian but he changed his religion from Christian to Muslim

He said He didn’t like going to church
So does he like going to mosque

Is it the prayer affecting him or what

His he possessed..

Please what do you suggest we do cause his parents Nd family are worried over this

You this meo witch, why you nor ever get sense self?

You are nothing but a devil.

meobizy:
One knows the true gender of Nairalanders when accidents occur. This forum. Lol.

A. Use a very nice username
B. Always share meaning content..

I like being a silent reader.

Sadiqali24:
Hi...
I really want to become famous and popular in this forum..
How do I go about it?

You are right, the gods are truly hungry

KanwuliaExtra:
Meaning what?

Just try to control all your hash speech

dawnomike:
If i start sharing my own 'experiences', this thread go full
The best is just to flee from such as from a poisonous snake!!!

Share yours. We will like to read yours

You have said it all.

Emaprince:
I thought about it too..and I know its possible they had an agreement prior to him going to UK. But then, the fact that the senator went about it in such a secretive way shows he has an ulterior motive to "use and dump" the guy...or possibly deleting him off existence so this incident won't have no trace. I know I might be reaching but, this is a Nigerian politician whose hands are dirty and bloody..so wasting a poor boys life to save his daughters is easy for him.

It is very possible he haven't paid a penny to that boy..except the feeding and UK travel. So my initial speculation is still valid. I like the fact that the doctor talked to him and he was very smart to renege on whatever agreement they had.

To me..I strongly believe they deceived that boy with fake promises because they wanted to use him and useless his life. Ekweremadu should be jailed.

Chaiii
You are indeed a crazy woman

You are insane..

KanwuliaExtra:
This Ekurukere-MADUS saga has too many angles that cause incurable migraines trying to dissect.

Look at the ? trisexual guy that looks like a cross-breed between a “snake” and an “agama lizard”?

Nigerian Poverty Capital Of The World-TUALE!!!!!


How can The Ekweremadus accept any organ from this kind of STREET-person instead of from one of their family member if NOT FOR RITUALS?

Fear CHRISTIANS o.

The sight of him gives me the jeepy-creepies!
I won’t even take his kidney to give my dog. You can tell he is a drug-addict and into male prostitution.

This dude sidan for mansion for ONE WEEK dey feast, and international passport land for im hand juss like dat? From where? No capturing?

He was told he had a job waiting in the UK for a “15 year old”, “21 year-old” or “41 year-old” and he or any of his family members did not ask for details? To work illegally without a work visa or with a visitor’s visa?

Those immigration officers from A-Z should be JAILED without trial.

Nigerian passport is useless for real.

frozen70:
That building is supposed to have thunder arrest, that's the only way out

OK.
Good.

Tamilore11:
Yes. U can get struck to death.

Oo.
K.

djranking00:
Install thunder (lightning )arrestor or defector

OK.
Thanks.

Mariangeles:
Has it ever happened before?

No, but I have seen lightening fall in year 2002

Hmmm

Mariangeles:
You see what I mean.

Change! Make thunder and lightning no locate you.
Na bad omen!

You mean I should pack out from there?

Mariangeles:
If your way no pure, oga change o!

Are you normal?

ObamaMessi:
I finally arrived in America.

Can't believe Victor Divine is in yankee.

I live in Willowbrook, Houston, Texas.

It has always been a dream since I was 10, now 19 and my dream is reality.

I will soon work my way to NY to recide in Alabama.

My dream of becoming Governor of New York, U.S Secretary of State and subsequently becoming U.S President (after we amend the constitution to make naturalized citizens eligible to run for the Presidency) is materializing.

Just a week plus here, I know the difference between a first world country and a third world shithole.

I implore all of you to work your ass off to the U.S and live that shithole to your selfish politicians.

#GodBlessAmerica!!!

VictorUSA
You should at least insert some photos.

iHaveOnlyGod:
What can I do with my life now? My mother want to sacrifice me to the coven of witches.
I have ran and ran. Someone should talk to me. Somebody ginger me

Your first enemy is fear. Your only weapon is prayers. Don't pray against your mother, but pray against witches and witch-craft powers

Antyxx:
Takes a year

Yes, unless you are not patient. Patiently work towards it, you will get what you want.

Antyxx

What you want is good. But come to Nigeria and marry him. Then go back to your country and filed for him to join you. The answer to your question is through marriage