₦airaland Forum

adamskutty:
I must confess, u are a fresh fish. From whence originated?

From the two places you love to hate the most . Lol my dad is Nigerian (Igbo) and my mom is Ghanaian (Northern region but not muslim)

lezz:
It's Sunday.

Tomorrow is Monday and it is getting late. Neways which part of Nigeria are you from?

You guys are still on it. You really have a lot of time on your hands

LordReed:
You come to a public forum to air your brain addled views, yes I know you. Women are a curse abi? I know you, you misogynist.

lol let the guy be. If he wants to be a bachelor all his life it's his choice but he must just say the truth. Even if some men don't want to get married they still crave a women and this man seems not to have such for the past 10 years which makes me come to the conclusion that he must simply be gay.

Am so sick and tired of all these c.o..ck and bull stories

kilokeys:
we can stand it cos we are resilient..

u would definitely run mad if u try imitating us.

we r made from tougher materials.. ode oshi.. and with all ur light and kenke no charlie fit ever fresh reach me and my padis

black dead stars

slowpoke much. Smdfh

Idowuogbo:
I'm not Beyonce. I'm ME!!! Idowuogbo aka BADOSKY. Secondly, I have a right to air my opinion on someone generalising and going on like she's all that.To bad you see it as tearing her down.IMHO, i would expect someone posting videos up n down ranting about Nigeria men to be all that and more! She's none of the above. Ya Dig?!

How is she generalising when she specifically stated that its based on her own experience? I know that if this video was why I don't date Nigerian Women there would be a lot of different comments and the guy would not be bashed and insulted like how this lady is. Anyways do whatever you need to do. If bashing people on their looks is your thing well who am I to say otherwise

Firstly she also listed some positives about Nigerian or African men in general. It wasn't all bad. People have different opinions and experiences and she specifically stated that it's not all Nigerian men but the ones that she encountered.

In life people will always say something you don't like. That's the reality of it and you don't have to accept it or like it but there is really no need for certain holier than though people to go on a tangent about this.

Some people will relate to what she has said cos they have experienced it and some people will not because they have not.

About the age thing. She did not become 33 in 1 day. It's obvious this thing has been going on for a long time. She has said that she does not want to get married because of age and settle. A lot of women find themselves in this boat and settle for anything because of age and then we start hearing about stories that touch.

Lastly 33 isn't old. It's grown. This type of thing is always said by a man who is in his 40s himself. Smh.

Idowuogbo:
Lmao! Yayy!!! I won!!! *dancing nzogbu nzogbu*

I don't get why you have to make fun of her looks. You may not think she is beautiful but there is really no reason to tear her down. Women are really our own worst enemy. You will never find a man doing this about another man smdh. I hope you are Beyonce yourself

babyosisi:
No we are not

First generation nigerian Americans are our children
We are immigrants

Believe me sis very first nigerian American girl I have come across says the same exact things this girl is saying

Thank you.

EfemenaXY:
I am a first generation Nigerian married to a first generation Nigerian man too. So is Babyosisi. And many others I'm sure.

Re: the bolded, then why bother at all. Since her experience has been a nightmare so far, it begs the question as to why she keeps going back for more.

That's my point. I understand why as a first generation she would want to be with a first generation Nigerian man and not FOB because of the above I just stated. It seems you did not watch the video at all

EfemenaXY:
Quit with the swearing pls. It's not necessary and I don't like it.

Yes, I stand by what I posted about being you are what you attract. The whole purpose of dating is to see if you're a compatible match. Fine, she hasn't met her match so far from her limited pool of Nigerian men, but does that give her the right to generalize? Would she happily classify her father and other menfolk in her family in the same way she's downgraded majority of our men?

She in an environment where it's no big deal NOT TO GET MARRIED. So why is she going on and on and on about it? Why is she allowing her self to be hooked up with Nigerian men by her multitude of aunts / relatives. There's plenty of fish in the ocean. Let her look elsewhere na. Just because she's born of Nigerian parents doesn't mean she's got to get hitched to a Nigerian man.

She says one thing but means something else.

Lol because I said BS you are having a hissy fit about it? Like I said before, there is no such thing as you are what you attract otherwise why do some good people end up with bad people? Let's just agree to disagree okay

EfemenaXY:
Thank you!



That isn't entirely true.

It's unfair to categorize our men like that. Even my late father-in-law (God rest his soul) was an excellent cook and entertainer. Hubby cooks. My dad cooked. My youngest brother cooks so well, he's almost putting his sisters to "shame". Hubby cooks. All my boys cook and are well brought up (as per knowing how to treat a woman).

Let's be honest here. We are what we attract. She should go search herself.

I don't believe that BS you are what you attract. If that was true, all good peeps would be together and all bad peeps will be together.Those men who cheat on their wifes. Did they ask their men to cheat on them? So they are what they attract yet they have not been cheating on their husbands.

EfemenaXY:
It's a good thing she knows exactly what she wants but at 33 she's not a child and shouldn't be hung up on Nigerian men. Our men are what they are and no tribe/race is perfect. Sure our men have their imperfections, but who doesn't?

She can go marry a Black American if she likes. Why is she so hung up on our men? Na by force to marry? If she's meeting the wrong type, then she should either expand her dating pool (like she knows she should), or she should take a deeper look within herself to find out what sort of person she portrays herself as or the message she gives off about her person

She says she's not trying to bash our men but her video isn't far off from it. Let her find who'll make her happy and quit with the slagging off.

Her comment annoys me jor.

CC: Chillisauce. Smartmom. Bukytayne. Ifyalways. Edwife.

I don't think she is hung up on Nigerian men. I think she is actually quite open to dating others. She clearly states in the video that it is about her personal experience with the Nigerian men she has interacted with. Truth be told her height and age is not helping matters.

 It can be hard trying to relate to a culture when you yourself are a product of other influences. As a 1st generation, I can relate to her wanting to date her culture but there being room for her to add other influences. Maybe she went wrong when she generalized, but there was a lot of truth in what she said. She didn't lie about the bending and the twisting that some women do just to get married either and how you are considered old after you pass 30

I will never understand why society looks down on people who are not married before a certain age. So, because someone hasn't found a life partner by the age of 30 that means their life is worthless? It's sad that people have this mentality. Some people don't want to jump into marriage just for the sake of being married and appeasing other people. Is that wrong?

panachuku:
it is, y do all those black footballers go afta whites

Inferiority Complex simple

osystein:
viral video shows vigilantism not xenophobia http://m.news24.com/news24/SouthAfrica/News/Viral-video-shows-vigilantism-not-xenophobia-police-20150411 true story of shocking "xenophobic Video revealed http://m.news24.com/news24/SouthAfrica/News/True-story-of-shocking-xenophobic-attack-video-revealed-20150411

Let me get this straight. So burning a group of people has now been termed Vigilantism. Seriously? That's murder. I hope you don't believe this nonsense yourself. Those people should be jailed. Whether they are foreigners or not is besides the point. Irrespective of what they did, nobody should be burned period. Why were they not jailed instead? I am just amazed at the way some people think. This is quite disturbing to be honest.

I wonder why after all these years the violent attacks on black foreign nationals are still being referred to as Xenophobia and not Afrophobia.


Definitions...#Xenophobia: "deep-rooted, irrational hatred towards foreigners"...#Afrophobia: "fear, hate, or dislike of Black Africans"

I think Afrophobia would be the correct term since the white foreign nationals etc are not targeted but only the black foreigners.

There is no justification for such acts. All over the world you will always find foreigners. Imagine if countries such as Uk and America had to burn and murder all foreigners in their Country. I feel like the biggest problem is the nonchalant attitude of the police and Government in general towards these foreigners. It really bewilders me that these same set of people should know better from apartheid. They should know how it feels to be so hated, oppressed and killed yet they are killing the same set of people from countries who their leaders seeked asylum from.

Ilekeh:
Please tell me you guys didn't take your arrogance to SA and started calling the country a "no man's land".


Jesus! See how they're cutting people like meat. May Lagos never end up this way.

I really can't believe your comment. Was this neccessary? You are just as bad as the people doing such acts.

GoodFaith:
LOL Please
I didn't tell u I like white women---
I have seeing Nigerian men paying high price for limiting themselves to their culture in regard to married
just trying to marry from their tribe or women from other culture
Nigerian women dating out Nigerian men talk bad about Nigerian men --please cut the BS because I know better

perhaps the ones you know talk bad but the ones I know don't. You should really stop generalising. Again I have no problems or qualms who Nigerian men date. Just that there is no need to insult and put us down

MrsChima:
LOL@getting Nigerian men to move on up.

GoodFaith:
U live in UK
So tell us stories about our women
80% of Nigerian men in UK are dating other African or English girl. and Caribbean girls
Lot of Nigerian men are dating other African women that don't have stay in UK

lol @ 80%. Listen my problem is not with Nigerian men dating out. Nigerian women date out as well. My problem is with the fact that some of you men feel the need to constantly bash Nigerian women. If you like white women then good for you but why must you constantly insult us? When Nigerian women date out, you hardly find them insulting or talking bad about Nigerian men and you men are not exactly perfect as well.

Juvante:
The worst thing that a man can do to a woman while dating , is to dump her! From your logic, you are saying that because she was dumped or abused in the past by men, her reaction is to make huge financial demands on a guy who earns less than 30k per month. A girl lives with her parents but uses a Apple watch! Yes, Apple watch and a Blackberry Passport in her hand! Apart from aristo runs, tell me where can she make such a money! I see them strutting about in Christian Louboutini shoes, Chanel bags, and other luxury designers items! I am not exaggerating because I have been there and seen it all. The pressure to be like the girl next door is too much, and the female folk are not helping matters. It is easier been a broke ass guy than a broke chic because even your fellow women will not hang out with you! But a guy can buy a fellow guy bottles of beer for him to drown his sorrow! It's a men's thing! A child's formative years is with the mother and not the father! Humans are not penguins, whose males sit on eggs while the female go out hunting in ice floes! Why do you think that in the Nigerian culture, the lady is considered the pride of her mother? So, get that idea out of your head that men folk are responsible for the inordinate greed exhibited by most girls nowadays !
It is all make believe! Every girl wants to dress like Tonto Dike, but how many of them has a guy rich as Malivehood or Chris Aire, the king of diamonds? Different strokes for different folks! Simple as that! Awolowo once said and I quote its English translation, " instead of the leopard to be the one carrying the hunting bag for the lion, it's better for them to hunt separately!".
That's settled it.

so how does this translate to the whole Nigerian female population. Just because you met 1 or a few bad eggs does not mean we are all the same. Are Nigerian men all the same?

If you're a Nigerian man who has more than enough negative thought towards your fellow nigerian women you are self loathing. You can not be a Nigerian man and hate that which you come from. If you do it starts with the women in your lives like the mother, aunts, sisters, grandmother. What is it about them you don't like? Could it be their response to how they were treated by nigerian men Ponder that thought and be a better man. Stop pointing the finger and change what You do. Raise your daughters to be better women. It starts with you Nigerian men.

@ mikron thank you. Am so glad we still have men like you around.

There are way too many childish men on here. Honestly I hope this is not how the average Nigerian male behaves in Nigeria. Anybody is free to date who they like, if you like foreign women then great but is there really a need to bash your Nigerian sisters. Not all Nigerian women are bad just like not all Nigerian men are the best thing since slice bread. We could also go on about you men but there is no point in that to be honest. Go for what you want and be happy without insulting the whole female nigerian population. I must admit am yet to hear Ghanaian men complain and say nasty things about their women like the way Nigerian men do.

ronald4lif:
Na today nyansh dey back?

If I need something and it will take me just a lie to get it so be it. Should she have told you the truth maybe you won't have bought her the airtime. And did the lie remove anything from her body? No. Did she get what she wanted. Certainly.

but some lies are unneccesary. Why should lies(deceit) be something that should be done in order to get what you want.

babyosisi:
Don't you hate it when they keep saying will you do so and so if it was your mother
Well my mother will not come and and attempt to take pictures off an album
She will make a request and I will offer to get her some prints
She certainly will not attack me for saying no
Why do they expect anyone to treat someone like their mom when the person is not acting like their mother

Exactly. But I can't help but feel sorry for the women who end up marrying such men. Wrong is wrong and the more he entertains his mothers bad behaviour the more she will grow wings and feel more entitled to do as she pleases. Smdh

donedy:
No matter what the reason might. It shows lack of respect and poor upbringing on your wife's end.

If I may ask, has your wife ever raised her hand against her own mother in any circumstances? If so, it's your fault for bringing such a lady to your family.

A respsonsible lady with good manners would have left the scene and come to you after your mom slapped her.

To make such a scene with an old lady show your wife lacks modesty, virtues and good upbringing.

My advice is for her to apologize to your mother, your family member. If possible, she should bring her family members to help apologize to your mother. It's during that period will your mother accept her apology, and if possible feel remorse about slapping your wife.

Nevertheless, your wife has no right to engage your mother in such manner, let alone exchanging fist with her. Just imagine how you'll feel if you heard your sister is exchanging fist with your mother.

Has her own mother slapped her daughter because she refused her demands. So why will she treat her mom badly if her mom treats her well.
How can she consider his mom as her mom when she treats her like poo. We are human beings. If someone treats you badly will you go and kiss them? Off course not. Make realistic comparisons please

Nweike1:
Send ur wife packing! Immediately. Don't ever quarrel with or mum becos of ur wife. She is not worth it. Ur wife can come back after she has begged ur mum and other family members

So would you have given your father the same advice if his mother slapped your mother and she told him to send her packing. Its really appalling the way some men think. He must send the mother of his kids packing after being slapped. I really dunno anymore. Fyi not all wives will come back. I certainly would not come back begging after being chased out of my own home for something I did not start. It shows the man has no iota of respect for me and he does not love me. A man who loves his wife would not do this.

EbolaParasite:
Any woman that doesn't respect my mum is a goner. No questions asked. You only got one biological mum. Wives are replaceable juh

a good wife is hard to find. There are many women and men out there but getting the wrong one can either contribute to your success or ruin you. Let him go and bring another woman who will be even worse and when your mother fights that one too, I guess you will divorce her. He also has kids with his wife and they may grow to hate the father. Just imagine a child saying my dad left my mom because my grandma slapped her and they fought. Does that make sense to you.


Honestly this is why I can never marry a mommas boy. They are weak and let their mothers control everything in their life nor can I get married to someone whose mom and I don't get along esp if he is the sissy type like you. I want peace in life. The op should have set them down a long time ago and laid out the cards from the start.

TheFilmmaker:
What the hell are you people saying? A woman slapped my mom? And you expect me to take it like it's Nescafé? Why is everybody so hypocritical in judging? My wife can not even have the effrontery to slap my junior sister, not to talk of my mother. WTF are you people talking self?

it seems you have comprehension problems. That women is his wife not just any woman and his mother slapped his wife(his kids mother in her own home) first in which she retaliated unfortunately. I really think both parties are to blame but the mother started it.

Imagine if it was the reverse where the FIL slapped his SiL simply because he refused to give him something he demanded and now wants to break up the family. Its wrong. There are better ways to handle it but truly some mother in laws are something else. When you leave your parents home and marry then you become one with your wife. He needs to talk to both of them. Get his wife to apologise for peace sake and try and keep them far away from each other.