₦airaland Forum

Zaynie, we will miss you on Newborn thread! Don't worry, we do handover to someone suitable there. All the best, hope to see you soon!
BellaElla, melly245 and others, bring your babies and come join us in the newborn thread when you're ready. Lack of sleep makes that place chill

Welcome to our new mothers here! Feel free to ask questions, if I may make a few suggestions:

1.try and use Nairaland search function to check for your question first. The reason I say so is because people give information based on who is here. Example: a while back, when the thread was active, most mothers and doctors here agreed not to give a teething powder called Piccan to babies. New mothers who didn't check the search function didn't see that and people who may not have known encouraged the use of Piccan. So try and use the search function so that you get as many answers as possible, because what I may be telling you may be wrong.

2. If you see replies like "take baby to the hospital", it is because we may not know or the situation may sound bad (to us). Please take your baby to the hospital, no-one will laugh at you for being a panicky new mother, doctors are expecting you sef. So don't say "oh I don't like hospitals". If you go there and you don't see improvement, come back here and tell us what happened. Some of us are nurses, doctors or married to doctors. They can take your case up (but let me say it's hard to treat without seeing which is why they want you to go to the hospital first).

3. There is no such thing as a stvpid question. You may not like the manner the reply is given but that is the beauty of a forum: you are talking to several people with different experiences. Don't take it personally. Don't worry about HOW the message was passed along, focus on the CONTENT of the message please. Remember, everyone here is rooting for you to succeed as a Mother and come take your place as a skilled adviser here.

4. Share your joys and happiness and sorrows here. Feel free to ask if there are Mums here in your neighbourhood that wanna hang out. Feel free to share pictures, all you new mums are going to be snapping 10 million pictures of every smile and every fart. We love celebrating birthdays here, we expect pictures (and cake. And dollars shared in an envelop too as birthday party souvenir. ).
There are no cliques here (Every one is too tired from lack of sleep ). Also, don't assume people don't want to reply you. Sometimes it may happen but there are several factors that are coming into play. You don't know what people are going through. So always give the benefit of doubt and don't exchange sharp words with someone and then be chewing your lip later wondering how you will ask them for help, okay?

This place can be one of the greatest helps you will ever get. A little girl's life got saved and it started from here and spread all over NL.

So, go for it!

MizOmalicha:
Pls i need help, my son is 5weeks and at night he struggles to breathe as though he has catarrh or his nose is blocked after I breastfeed him and try to lay him back 2sleep, it makes him so uncomfortable.. I get scared and confused because I don't know what to do, please I need help from experienced mums or any doc in the house
Thank you

Take him to the hospital to get his chest listened to. If you can go today, it will be better. Just to make sure it's a minor thing. Take him today, okay?

Edible paint for babies

Baby E likes to pour water on the glass table and paint. As a child, i used to design all walls until one clever sister assigned a big metal tank as my drawing board and I left the house walls in peace. Kids love painting. Dunno why, but they do (maybe it is because they can see mummy crying about the mess afterwards).

Mix cornflour with water on a stove and food colouring when it has cooled down. Just give the paint and paper to baby and tell him/her to freestyle like Picasso. The paint is safe for babies to put in their mouth and usually easy to clean off glass tables. Avoid walls, they stain if you have a bathtub, put baby inside and tell her how proud you are of her for redecorating it. Run the shower when she's done with her masterpiece (but snap it first. Save it for posterity ).
Paint should last for about 10 days before going bad. Trust me, all other commercial brands will finish just as fast and cost more.

This one I love. Baby E likes playing with page already. Every mother should try and equip her playbox with paint and brushes. You have nicer non-toxic brands like Reeves to cheaper brands like Nataraj. Get a carton and cut in a circle and paint it some colours. Get wooden pegs and paint in corresponding colours. The child can be pegging away. Very good way to teach colours. You can also do it with Alphabets.

For mamas looking for CSS Bookstore, please go to Broad Street, Lagos Island. It is right across the PEP store and I think Fidelity Bank. There is also a library across it (though I don't know if they allow very small children, I will ask). ZODML is on Awolowo road, before Goodies supermarket, Ikoyi.

These activities are based on actual toys for kids (I have a wooden version of the carton and ball one) just that this is the DIY version.

As much as possible let us reduce tv time instead of 5 hours of tv let it go down. HTH.

Contem2011 and other mamas with babies whom are now more active, here are some games you can play with Olamide. Also, the games teach some of the important stuff babies are supposed to learn (Sensory activities, Gross motor skills). Plus, this is super cheap to do.

Get a carton, cut 5 holes in it and paint around each hole a different colour. Get those cheap plastic balls and let baby matching the ball to the right hole via colour. See pictures below.

Keep the inside cylinder from tissue roll. Tape it to your wall and give baby something to throw through it (they used pompoms which you can find in art stores around Ojuelegba and in other towns outside Lagos).

Get 5 zips of different colours and stick or staple them to a carton.

All these teach gross motor skills (ability to use their fingers and be coordinated). I spoke to an educator and that is one of the most important things Pre-K wants in your child. She called it ability to hold a pencil and write.

Cc Abiagirl777 Proudmum38, I can't remember all the mama's with toddlers and babies over 6 months old to tag o, no vex

zemaye:
We buy enough stuff because of that bolded guy up there


I recently had a BBG and all those grape water ! Massage coRd with hot water abi hot towel nothing I do and this girl is smashing all her milestone the nurses and health visitor are amazed at her growth and steady progress.
If to say him grandma come quick she for hear am with all the hot water and all
Even as I had her in summer.
What women go through for kids
Hmmmmm.
Anyway do what works for you

And for the record
I didn't even press my stomach with any hot water
But I drank peppr soups
And am back to my flat stomach
(Even the stress of juggling 2 dependent kids no reach ni )
We will be six weeks in 2 days time
The bubba is fine and so am I

Congratulobia!!!! Lookatyou handling everything beautifully and with a flat tummy!! Go girl!!

(Sobs quietly in a corner at my lack of general organisation).

Placebos are the best. One of my doctor family friends has a placebo multivitamin he recommends when he sees mothers. According to him "anything to shut them up". The way Baby E's doctor recommended it to us, I gave him a very dirty look and told him I knew what he was upto.

It's just funny the things you do because you think it does something. All the baby massage videos I watched, plus organic coconut oil applies judiciously and hot water baths did not make anyone sleep through the night. One of my brothers had to vex and say "what nonsense baby massage will make baby's joints flexible, is Nigeria winning medals in Gymnastics? Are Chinese and Ukrainians doing baby massage ni?"

Yes, but not in anger and not too often. Fear has its limits and the person Ooga Booga Baby E is afraid of us Himself, who glared her into silence 2 nights ago. My hand-smacking only stops for a few minutes.

However, all that will change the day i find a phone with nudey pics or makeup, a mini-skirt and an older teenage boy's contact. That day, I turn into a Bolton

eolowu1:
tanx for d responses, pls dont say my wahala is too much u no as a ftm. I noticed my baby reduced kind of abi its jst my intuition. am worried abt d poo, pls sabi mamas can I use grip water for my baby doc said I shud nt but my mum is using it for him to avoid stomach ache pls contribute

The Grand Mama religiously gave Gripe water. I allowed her because I was too shellshocked to care. I stopped after 2 months and I don't know if it made a difference. I didn't notice any. It may be a placebo for mothers. if you can find a non-alcoholic one that doesn't blow your pocket and you're not sure, get it. If it's pricey for you and your baby doesn't have a stomach ache, don't.

ChinonsoDike2:
You monkeys can barely read. It wasn't Amaka's shop. She was a fashion designer the last time I checked. She was just bringing it to the notice of the public. Black, low IQ monkeys. This is why no black African country can achieve anything. You hustle backwards. You should be encouraging business owners not destroying them. Animals.

Is that her IG handle? I thought it was Amaka Nwaz..who was involved. I feel bad because Himself and I patronize Nulijuice. They should have been asked to vacate or closed the premises down (that's how LASG has always done it). I'm assuming the Landlord of that property is someone who is clashing with Ambode or Tinubu. The tenants should take their landlord and LASG to court. They have a chance.

frugalandnatura:
Hello everyone, I need your help please. Does anyone know where I can get these items. I have an old container that I want to use as a planter but I want to upcycle it. I also need Mod Podge to attach the rope.

Aren't you in luck! I did the same but with thread on some bottles. You can't find Mod Podge easily here (but I bought 2 jars of it and truly I don't think it's all that, it doesn't stick so well). Try using white carpenter's glue (that's what I used and it's lasted over a year and a half indoors). For the raffia, under the bridge at Maryland/Mende has them (I got mine from there). HTH

Hey knuckbuck, do you have proof that she travels for long periods? You see, the law favours the mother but if you can prove that there's a very strong chance she will travel for long periods and leave her children unattended (even with friends is not acceptable), a good lawyer can put enough fear into her heart. I think you need a better lawyer, not expensive but one who is good at Family Law. Go online, there are a lot of forums about this situation. Read responses there till you are a name of a lawyer who demolished the opposition. That's who you need.

Can you get proof of the infidelity? I'm not trying to push for a divorce but sometimes in order to get a cease-fire you must be able to show your opponent you can match fire for fire.

I think you can fix the relationship between you and your wife but you have to first put out the fire burning now. Your wife cannot have her mind turned so easily unless you and Life contributed to it. So let us get her to the negotiating table first and see what else can happen.

AlphaHandMaiden:
Great idea but a few glitches i feel that need to be ironed out or clarified in case it is misunderstood.

Most people who have their kids in creches do so as they are going back to work fulltime and are unlikely to be able to spare such time no matter how great the benefits.

My interpretation of such a group is that it is ideal for mums still on maternity leave, stay-at-home mums or mums who have the luxury of working for themselves. Where they can meet other mums, mingle and also do something educative with their babies.

Is it a full time thing or do you mean meet once a week for a few hours?

A venue needs to be arrange beforehand! Do you meet at a park ( weather needs to be considered) or an indoor venue - perhaps a church hall which is likely to be vacant mid week afternoons so you may be able to blag free use!
Alternatively Do you take it in turns to host at your house? (Some may not be comfortable with this).

If you decide that your mummy-and -me group is to be a creche of some sort or offer childminding services then it should provide the mums some flexibility of dropping off the baby and popping off to do something else. If there is a mum within each group that is happy to mind another's child while she is away for a bit, it either has to be reciprocated if it is a one off thing or payment agreed if it is for a longer run..

Its not like i am trying to pick holes in the idea but if the base rules are not trashed out and clarified it has a tendency to get rather messy!

This is for a few hours every week.
For mothers looking for places to drop their kids for the day and go do errands or whatever, there are places which offer those services (I know 2 in my area and they are open weekends). This isn't it.

A Mummy-and-me group is not a paid service, it is a group of mother's and their kids hanging out. So the mother has to be present. When my friend organised hers, with older kids she and another mum could organise day trips for them and other mums could watch the babies who couldn't go. Not a paid service but a community service.

A lot of creches in Nigeria, the first thing they do is buy tv and get DSTV and toys. I have never heard of storytime (maybe they do but I tend to hear from people who are opening daycares as their business and they themselves use books as decor so they won't offer that service in their daycare). It is in Pre-K they start doing activities they should have done since, some creches and daycares will potty-train your child though. Kids will develop fast because they are spending time with older kids (a plus for creches) but then they got a plateau at a certain stage (below 5 years) and it begins to be measured according to individual child and the input he/she gets.

Location will be determined by the mothers doing it. In the Island, they have 2 parks. In Ikeja and Alausa, they have even more parks. Festac i believe has 1 park (I see it when people are having weddings). For those whom don't want to use their homes, there are venues like restaurants (whom are looking to fill up space and attract clientele) that are amenable to this sort of arrangement (they already do such for social events like dancing, natural hair meetups and more).

If a mother decides to organise one in Surulere, no problem. It's not supposed to be a paying service. If I am organising one, I would do it in a park around my area, tell mums coming that they should bring enough food to share for 2 kids (I'm not expecting jollof rice but bananas and cheerios and biscuits, snacks to be precise), bring plastic toys (we are in public, I will provide antibacterial wipes), wrappers and blankets to sit on and be ready to clean up after we are done.

For mothers who work (particularly in Lagos), they tend to suffer the strains of Motherhood without the pleasures of it. I know mothers who drop babies off at 7am and pick them up at 6pm. They miss the milestones and playtime because it's dinner and bedtime once they get home. This is a chance for you to realise your child is a generous sharer, a powerful singer or hugger or a great dancer by spending quality time with your child.

There would be rules about some certain behaviours but basically it's an open group. People have pregnancy classes that are not paid for during antenatal and invite medical people to give talks and offer each other support.

Thanks to all the mama's who replied. Reading culture has been dying of recent in our country. When I watch some tv shows (I love "Nina & The Neurons), I'm so excited by them (and they're targeting under-7s) but then I come to NL and see how people tend to disdain knowledge for knowledge's same ("if it doesn't make you money, why learn?" Sort of thinking). And I see people asking questions that can be easily answered it they read. And unfortunately schools are for profit in Nigeria so they prioritise a nice environment over actual knowledge.

So here's my challenge to all of us: would you like to be part of your own Mommy-and-Me group? That means a couple of Mums get together, bring their kids, there's storytime and sharing toys and singing. Everyone will bring snacks for at least 2 kids and everything must be shared.

As we can see, creche fees are rising astronomically and truly I can count the number of creches I see with kids whom are advanced (and I have seen kids from creches where they paid in dollars). So instead of keeping your kid cooped up at home, your Mummy and Me group will be your creche. And because you're the ones in charge, you get to encourage your kid more than some paid Nanny. Plus you get to have your kids bond and you find with other mother's. Also, because of our diverse backgrounds, you will be exposing your child to do much more.

If you know you can handle something like this, please try and look for mums in your area and try this.

Unfortunately I don't believe you will find a good business idea on Nairaland. All these "hit me up for more info" guys are very suspicious. And I wouldn't invest in that hospital idea, simply because I know at least 5 consultants and specialists in different medical fields and they are not planning on rushing into establishing their own hospitals soon (these guys are guys whom people respect and some probably taught you or you are reading a textbook published by them). A hospital has to build up reputation and be located in the right area to attract the right sort of paying clientele. People are now beginning to realise that the attractiveness of the facility doesn't equate to the experience of the staff. So that's a No for me without even reading your proposal.

N10mil in this economy isn't much. People are cutting bigger deals with much less because they have other things in place like connections and networks. Look for something people need. Especially now that people are not spending like they used to, try and invest in something very affordable. My best suggestion is Processing of an Agricultural product, not growing but processing it. I found out something interesting about Cassava yesterday, maybe start reading up about that.

Long-term, I would put my money in Arts and Culture. Someone's dad bought a N500,000 statue from a Nigerian artist and less than 15 years later it is now worth $22,500 and counting. If I get N500,000 I would buy from that guy. If I had N2mil, I would buy a painting by EL Anatsui. Barring that, I'd invest in a cultural centre for Arts and Music. But that is a long-term strategy when you have a bit of income to play with. But it will pay off, ask Nike Arts Gallery.

Abiagirl777:
Mamas God will keep blessing us even in this reccession,meanwhile I've downloaded the pinkfong app already and we r at it.I tried buying one last month,the cheapest was #2500 at a bkshop in pH.when he flings it away I tell him I don't blame him at all but sometimes he likes to turn the pages with speed,he'll be one on 9/9.
Our Lo's will turn out well in Jesus name Amen.
Onegai et all,more grace.

That's really pricey for one book. Can you get someone in Lagos to help buy a few and send down to PH? This one below is a pop-up book that cost me N1,250 (hilariously it scared the crap out of Baby E when she first read it, because of the pop-up ). And that was one of th most expensive ones I got that day.

Lorenorganic:
I am looking for fresh vegetables like pepermint leaves lemongrass,lavender cinnamon sticks.ceylon cinnamon I want am looking for these items can anyone help me out.Contact me on bbm 7AF93481.

My mum had 2 big lemongrass plants in front of our home in Lagos. There's a guy I met who sells Spinach, watercress and other fresh veggies in Ilupeju but he can deliver everywhere.

Alagbaraokunrin, please I can't check my pm. Can you drop a line here (general explanation not detailed). Thanks.

The OP is a blogger, so your answers are not going to whoever (if there was an actual person even) asked the question. So he can't give answers to your own questions.

rofemiguwa:
I read to my daughter and sing to her too. I got this pinkfong app on my fone with colourful display of stories and songs. It catches her fancy,i do sing along and read along.. I also got her singing books.
I wanna get her more simple lettered colourful books.
I will check out broad street anybody know any other place in mainland i will appreciate.
She is 3months plus.


Can i start giving her abidec n codliver drops now

I want to say "probably no need to give any multivitamin for now" but I've learnt from the other thread to give generic answers . Every one tends to tell me not to give multivitamins in the breastfeeding stage (unless you know you don't eat properly/healthy). But sample others' ideas.
Books, they used to sell under the bridge at Ojuelegba and at Yaba busstop, but those guys got chased away. Maybe start searching from there...

mitchyy:
I watched all the 'watchables' when i was preggy.

I watched videos of vaginal birth with and withouy epidural, i watched videos of C-section even when i didnt plan for it. I just wanted to be prepared. And when my belly was being sliced, nothing felt strange to me. I anticipated everything

Fistbump. I respect this. Meanwhile, they've taken light and I'm watching one small baby pour water on a glass table and attempt to paint with it. Li'l Girl has talent

mitchyy:
Honestly, that section is something else. You'll even see those that will just read the heading of your post and start lashing out, without reading the full story.

I visit the section sometimes to have a good laugh. The responses are hilarious

I have a feeling they are just pretending to hate each other there. Because it gets so hilarious when they go offline and start digging up dirt on themselves so they can come back and trade insults and threats.

PresVA:
People seem too sensitive here.. all these are totally uncalled for...
Make una stop taking stuffs too seriously abeg...

Good day everyone

It's because they are not active in Family Section. Go and be sensitive there you will leave Nairaland sobbing that day by the time people use mouth wash you. You'll be wondering whether you stole their money or slept with their husband or made their father become a drunkard (come let's go and start a gender war there, what topic should we do??). The cure for this is to only reply those you know. Shikena. No worries, everybody happy.

Comtem2011, I've read and have been told, that too much tv below the age of 2 is not good. That there are studies which monitor their brain pattern during watching tv and it shows very little brain activity during watching (they can't interact with the tv so they don't use their brains) so tv doesn't benefit them before the age of 2, which leads to slower learning at that age. My daughter does the same thing: quiet in front of the tv, but she can recognise 2 or 3 shows she likes. But she doesn't talk much when watching it. Funny enough, she is now singing "Twinkle Twinkle little star" and she learnt it from me singing it to her and not from YouTube videos showing it (she can't recognise it when it is showing). I guess that's why books are recommended more, babies can feel and touch it and interact with it.

proudmom38:
Sorry to quote u ma'am.... I want to apologise to every mama involved in this matter, e jor e ma binu. We are one big family and I belive we have the interest and well being of each mama at heart... So please let's not give room to the devil please. Mamas that commented on the ish meant well as sisters and mothers... Oya all of una chop kisses!!!





Pheeww! Na me type dis one? Ayaf try gan ooo...



Goodmorning mamas!

Why are you calling my moniker! I say why are you calling my moniker!! Oya let's fight!! I'm supposed to be cooking stew today but I will leave it and fight you!! Oya remove your wrapper and throw blow!!!!!

I think the best thing to do is avoid answering monikers you don't know so well. When I started doing that, there was much less room for offending anyone.

ozycy:
I didn't know my moniker is hard o, thought it's as easy as A B C .

You that you used SOOOOO many consonants! Only one vowel!! Finding your moniker was like writing JAMB, even to pronounce it I couldn't

XX01:
Sometimes this thread can be so tasking. Those of us that have no choice but to go for CS have to read through various horror stories of traumatic CS births and how babies will be scarred and whatever. This is on a pregnancy thread. I now understand why my MIL keeps saying that i should stop reading about other people's BS that it might cause me to be afraid.

After reading the past couple of pages, i have been very afraid. Only that i hold on to the word of God that says that I will give birth like the Hebrew women, there shall be no lose in my household, I am an overcomer. All these stories can make someone run away from a hospital if the doctor insists that CS is the only option. For what? To win an argument.

I will take a brief hiatus from this thread and probably return to share my BS (if at all). Wish everyone the best.

For me, I feel it is better to be prepared. You see, I have quite a few medical people in my house (seriously, if you need to talk to a specialist, come to my house. Whichever type of doctor you want, with plenty experience, they are there). And those doctors, when they were treating me, always sounded harsh. I used to resent it and think "why can't you guys be nice?". So I said it to them and they allowed me go and experience Nigerian Healthcare system without the benefit of their protection. I am the one that carried my medical results back to them with tears in my eyes, begging.
The same thing happened when I gave birth: because they were not there, I was left to the mercy of strangers who had to do a job. And I was unprepared because I didn't ask the tough questions and didn't know what to expect because I didn't want to alarm myself. I found myself in postnatal depression after birth. My mum had to get them on the phone to talk to me and help me.

Don't be afraid. Yes, this all sounds scary but now you know. And you can be prepped. If I were you, I'd start working out, eating well. Surgery needs a healthy body to bounce back faster. Now, you can say you want to speak to the surgeon or OB going to do your CS, share your concerns, ask questions. I assure you he/she will appreciate it (my siblings are much nicer to patients who come in knowing something) and you can even ask your instinct "do I trust this doctor, is he sounding capable and experienced?"

During antenatal, my Gynae prescribed Lexotan (a sleeping pill) for every mother who complained they couldn't sleep. 6 out of them swallowed it without even knowing the name or checking. I was the only one who said "this is a Category D drug, please could you review my file, because I'm not sure I should". 4 hours later she called me and asked me not to take the meds. That's the difference between Ignorant Bliss, Giving into Fear and Armed with Knowledge.

You can do all you can to be prepared beforehand and pray to God. Or you can avoid knowing anything

BellaElla:
Mama's please there is something happening here I don't like about Jumayins post I don't like.
She asked a question and was answered appropriately. And I quote her "don't read and pass", a lot of mama's read and passed but a few took it upon themselves to answer her vividly. Why did other mama's not reassure her before she complained about the answers. What if everyone had kept quiet.
Jumayin mama no mama here derives pleasure in making u feel bad but experience and practice have taught plenty mama's here. The truth remains that the first reason u gave for opting out of VB is frivolous at best and mama's here answered you based on ur first post. No one knows what u discussed with your DH. If all mama's start treating serious posts with kid gloves or sugar coating the truth, I wonder if this thread would be as helpful as it has been.

My dear, you too mushhh . Me, I'm even going to remove my post. There now, ain't that better. oya please let this matter end here, no need for extra drama. The economy is in a recession, dontchyaknow?? Happy bumping!
Ozycy, thanks for your kind words a few days ago. I would have replied but I actually couldn't spell your moniker properly

Doubledouble:
Reading to your babies is very important. I started reading to my babies right from the womb and have continued till date. I started with babies bedtime prayer book when they were still in the womb. Now don't call me crazy, but I believe they recognize the reading from their wee days in the womb, just like they recognize my special song to them.

It is very important to read to the little ones as it helps build their interest, the coloured pictures also helps. It helps in building listening skills, it also helps their attention span and memory, et al...

I don't know where to get books at affordable price in Nigeria....is there even anywhere in this country to get anything at a good price?? Hmmm... On the type of books, I read the prayer book- religious-, fictional entertaining stories and I love showing them shapes in books. Reading to babies should not be left to the teachers alone, parents should endeavour to spend time reading and doing other little things with the kids. All the best though, with the books not ending up in their mouth!

The reason I'm asking is for research purposes. Something interesting may come up soon.
We have a mini-library of books and baby E actually brings her books to me to read for her. If you are in Lagos, your best bet is CSS Bookshop on Broad street and its environs. Books go from about N350 upwards there. Also ZODML library is free and well-stocked, with literacy programs targeting kids and is located in Awolowo road, Ikoyi.

Hello everyone. I'd like to ask a question please: how many of you have started reading to your children? What age did you start? Do you have a preference for a type of book (religious, cultural, early learning etc)? Do you know where to find books affordably? Do you think it's important to read to your child or do you hope the creche/daycare does it?

I'm asking because we keep addressing the physical well-being of our children but no-one mentions the mental well-being. And I think we rely a bit too much on teachers whom are (in all honestly) doing that job to cash a paycheck rather than because they want to give your kids the best knowledge.

PresVA:
Hello mamas. . My house is somewhat noisy due to generators, car horns ettcc.. so I'm thinking of buying earmuffs for my unborn baby to avoid the noise affecting him..
Don't know if this is advisable and wise?
Thanks

Awww, what a concerned mama. Why not soundproof your house? Because those earmuffs may not be super-comfortable (unless you can find special newborn ones). Look for the quietest room and soundproof it. The local way of doing so is to put mattress across the windows but it makes it hot. So I'm sure there's a better way.

JUMAYIN:
Good morning mamas,na so I showed Dh 1 of d BS shared here o,then he said no doc is gonna put fingers inside his wife's jajaina o, then we decided on d option of elective CS,now my question is how does 1 opt for elective CS coz I know some docs won't give u d option of that if der is everything is going on smoothly n does 1 wait to be full termed b4 d CS begins, plz mamas don't read n pass.thanks

Hmm. Are you having your baby in Nigeria? Do you realise how bad our Healthcare system is here and has gotten worse due to the dollar hike (hospitals are getting low on things like syringes and it is either they increase their fees or well...do the Naija method and cut some corners). Is your husband willing to risk your life and that of his child for his pride?
Perhaps you and he don't precisely know what will happen. Yes, BS can explain but they are not painting a picture. Allow me:
Go and carry your handbag. Hold the two sides of the top open. Good. Now drag them apart. Use your hands to be pulling them apart, shaking it as if you want to expand it. Now go and buy Digestive biscuit, eat one. The size of that biscuit is 10cm. That's how big you're going to get, so imagine pushing a 3.2kg baby (or more) through a whole the size of that Digestive biscuit.
That's what is going to happen to your vajajay during labour. The nurses will shove their hands inside you to check whether your mucus plug has broken and see how dilated you are. The doctor will pull open your coochie so he or she can have access easier. Even at 10cm (full dilation), you still have to be expanded to allow baby not get stuck in that hole and suffocate. Plus there will be a lot of fluids and blood being spilled everywhere and the doctor may be cutting you so you don't tear (even more blood).
So, does that sound like a sexy moment, do you think that anyone seeing that will be thinking "hmm, I'm so turned on right now??" Do you think anyone really wants to be looking at all that mucus and blood, what if you haven't shaved, it's not a pretty sight, dear.

Now, I approve of CS when there are no other options. . But I'm going to tell you the truth: All the women who die during childbirth died because they had a complication that required surgery. Even with all I described above, Vaginal birth is still much safer than CS.The only reason elective surgery started was because they had to do it to stop even worse complications and then people decided to start using it for random reasons. The doctors abroad won't agree to allow you do elective CS, they will do their best to convince you not to. But if you guys really want to trust a Nigerian hospital to put your life and that if the child into 50% chance of danger (hey, they may take light during surgery. That happened to my cousin at Nigerian Naval Hosp), because your husband is uncomfortable with people trying to allow you give birth the way God intended you to do, then go ahead.
Ask your husband to follow you to antenatal and let the doctor explain. Watch some birthing videos online. And maybe you guys rethink your decision. If you choose to still go ahead, no problem.