₦airaland Forum

^^ Thank you
I think his is a case of misplaced priorities. A great woman and a great learning opportunity.

Which one should pause first? One is aging(woman) while the other is always available(masters).

One is easy to come by(masters) while the other (great woman )is not

One can open doors to greater opportunities(masters)while the other cannot.( a marriage can dissolve)

Is is possible to kill 2 birds with one stone? so he does not end up losing a good thing altogether?

Op ask yourself this, if she decides to wait for you considering you have invested 4 years into the relationship and that you both love each each other,will you after your masters consider her old for marriage because I truly believe she doesn't mind waiting but the stigma associated with women and age is what must be driving her crazy.
You may need to show her some serious commitment otherwise we shall be reading another story here about a wasted relationship and a 30smthing yr old unmarried lady. If you think age will be an issue later, then you have 2 choices. Allow her to get married to someone else while you pursue your masters.There are plenty of women after all but you may regret having let go a good one.
On the other hand you could still marry and still pursue your masters.People are doing that all over.No big deal.

And after all is said and done dude,your conscience is the right teacher

And good luck

lol funny.
My company recently called a meeting and touched on this. Office dating was at an all time high,among the junior staff and their excuse was, they lack sufficient time to mingle outside.Its a very busy company anyway. The company issued a warning saying if 2 staff members decide to date and eventually marry then they must choose btwn them who stays and who goes! They will not have a company full of couples.
Its just crazy. Its not healthy at all. I have seen that the output reduces and people dont take the job serious. Its very easy to overlook a workers mistake cz you are dating them.
Well, since the meeting no staff is allowed to work extra hours unless its an emergency. Staff are literally  'forced' to go home and mingle with the outside world!

love is death



see how the above poster is getting consumed by its flames.

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies

@ op.I can only agree with your school of thought if you told me that virgins posess the below qualities.

Summary of the perfect wife

virtuous
faithful
committed
loyal
active
good shopper
early riser
enterprising
hardworking
late retirer
dextrous
generous
compassionate
secure
respectful
submitted
industrious
honourable
wise
kind
blessed
God fearing
praiseworthy

Virginity is only a temporary state. A wife is a world!

^ yeah you are correct.It works both ways and yes you must engage all elements of the brain.

It takes maturity to do that really.Some people are just too scared.

Oh I thought you were suggesting that they live together as man and wife before marriage.

Well my advise to any single working man/lady  is

'Get out of your mummy' s/daddy's house and learn to take on responsibilities;'

Pay bills,clean your house cook for yourself etc etc.

Test yourself and see if you can handle yourself first.

^kpolli,

I dont think so. See,what she's facing is not unique or extraordinary behaviour.

Nobody is perfect and living together will not perfect anybody infact you will never get married if you employ this because you will keep finding fault with every other person you date. I doub if habits can be compatible.

marriage is the best place to shape you up and transform you into a better stronger individual. Iron sharpens iron you know.

Some people have been married  for 20 yrs but some men still leave socks everywhere.You just learn to overlook some little things and focus on what is major for your marriage to survive.Otherwise habits can be pretty irritating.

@ op
No your man is not too much!! Theres nothing to fuss about here.This is a very minor issue that if not handle properly can blow out of proportion.What if you had kids and hes behaving the same? well there are some who do. Its your home you can handle this dear.
Learn to be strong. I can tell you that even if he washes and cooks you will always have responsibilities as a woman that will tire you more.
Like I said talk to him nicely,dont get angry,dont compare and thank him whenever he tries to help. Dont forget what brought you two together!! Not work ok?
cheers.

^^
how can you know if you have not lived together before? People do act a lot during courtship.This is manifestation of true self.

@op

That is his character.I may say hes a lil bit jealous but hey who isn't.If he went out and saw a beautiful lady on the street and he commented positively,will you not get offended? You will feel something however small.

And seriously, I am a woman and I will tell you frankly.Us women have a nasty habit.Instead of being direct we employ tactics like those ones you are using.
Admiring other peoples stuff and making our partners feel inferior/belittled.Infact we do it on purpose so that they can hear us. Its just an indirect way of saying'I wouldn't mind having that in my house'.True? You are already putting pressure on him no wonder he gets annoyed.

If you notice he dislikes that,it wont kill you to avoid repeating what he dislikes.I say this because you are already married and there's some things you must learn to sacrifice and let go for the sake of marriage.You do not have to always be right.

You have a long way to go these again are just teething problems.Real and greater challenges await you so the sooner you learn to deal with this small issue the better things will get for the both of you.

I will encourage you with this, You are yet to hear what others go through with for instance drunk husbands, some with even nasty habits that can drive you crazy.You will thank God and appreciate what you already have.

That is what Marriage reality is about, After the wedding,the honeymoon and all the sweet sweets,you find yourself with somebody you just cant understand because their true character and habits start showing.

People fight over pressing colgate the correct way,spreading beds ,the toilet seat, the garbage very silly things which if left unattended grow up into mountains.
Its very difficult and emotionally draining trying to change a grown up.He is fully grown, and stuck with his habits,not like a child that you can easily mould,therefore we need adjust and bear with each other's weakneses unless they are life threatening.

But there's still a way you can talk him into helping you at least.You do not even have kids so I hate to imagine how worse it could get!
Talk positively and remember,men can be like kids at times.When he does one nice thing show him lots of appreciation.That may encourage him to help you out again.
One thing I urge you to never ever do is talk about other men and how they treat their wives to your husband. Ouch that hurts his ego to the core.

Even if its true be wise and remember you picked him out of them all because he was the best.

Besides never judge a book by its cover.Not 2 marriages are the same.They also have their challenges which may even be worse than yours.The grass is not always green on the other side.Its only year one.Lots of adjustments take place within the first 3 yrs.
Cheers.

Something to ponder.

A woman who is quick to read thoughtfulness and every little positive action from a man to mean that the man is in a relationship with her is likely to be in a phantom relationship. Such a woman ignores every other sign that contradicts her belief and she holds fast onto a relationship that only exists as a fantasy.

Men, on the other hand, believe that deluded women misinterpret a man’s kindness to mean that they are in a relationship that is deeper than friendship.
The notion that men and women cannot be just friends further cements a woman’s misinterpretation of events.

A good man will treat a woman well just because he can. However, the problem arises when the woman decides to read more into his actions.
No man would want to be tied down to a specific relationship before his time. The trouble emerges when a woman assumes that just because you are being good to her, then she must be your girlfriend,”

A man would rather lose an arm than tell a woman she is not ‘the one’. In such a situation, the woman will continue believing in a non-existent relationship, while the man uses it to his advantage.

The only way a woman can avoid phantom relationships is by prodding a man during initial meetings.
Ask him all manner of direct questions to gauge what he wants from you. It could be that he just enjoys your company and nothing more. That way you can proceed with your interactions without the frustrating assumption that he is your boyfriend,

Cheers.

Reverse Psychology dating works both ways.
2 can play that game.
good luck.

upendo93?

Though am still shocked at the way nl men bash their fellow nigerian women.

Some of our status read N/A.

^^ very smart.

Nl's romance section 'f' newbies Rite of Passage!

Two types of love are unconditional; 1.God's 2. Parental.
The rest 
Have my doubts.

It is wikipedia

^^

free internet.but hey wait,it could help somebody else so don't dismiss it. You know,there are more mumus reading than those who post.
its worthwile.

@yoru-igbo

Sorry but that is all I could read. I don't even have any advise cz she herself knows very well why she attracts married men.
Now its time to settle and a good profile is needed.
Its all there in her 'cry of help'.
proceed and sort her out. simple.

I think am reading this from a different angle. Single men in the house this is all yours.

Profile

i'm 32 years old,
good-looking lady (sorry, i cant post my pix here)
i'm slim, dress fine and decently.
i ve been 'dateless' for a year now

proceed to make ur applications and save her from these hungry married men.

All will be well.

@op
At 26 yrs it means have been dating this same lady since u were 16 yrs
Did u start having protected sex when she discovered and disclosed her status?
get another test done.Wish u luck.

what is a white garment church! lol
They dress in white or?