₦airaland Forum

CanadaOrBust:
Alread told you, much of this paycheck to paycheck stuff is a choice.
Why do you need savings when all possible financial emergencies are taken care off: sickness, loss of job, old age, accidents

Depends on how you define choice.
Initially it can be said to be some sort of a choice but then as time goes on they are trapped - it's no longer a choice. Which ultimately eventually leads to bankruptcy!

dazzlingd:
Walahi they are in serious debt here.
Hunger and serious debt.

CanadaOrBust:
Alread told you, much of this paycheck to paycheck stuff is a choice.
Why do you need savings when all possible financial emergencies are taken care off: sickness, loss of job, old age, accidents

Never said they are hungry or not wealthy. But most of them do have debt and no savings - and, sorry, it's not by choice.
Are they also filling for personal bankruptcy by choice?? See below

pansophist:
PoliteActivist Have you seen this? These people don't even need 40k USD to reverse Japa to Africa, they just need a flight, that's all. Abroad is sweet o, but staying illegally with no chance to legalize oneself (something the government intentionally made to be nearly impossible) would make it hellish. The same water a fish calls home and swims in is the same water used to cook it.

That's why a HUGE part of the OP criteria is that YOU CHOOSE where you'd be dropped off with $1k in your pocket. There are places that TREASURE immigrant workers, legal or not. They want you and will do anything to keep you. Tell them any nonsense (like Boko Haram after you) and you have asylum!

PoliteActivist:
Not only don't they have savings, they OWE all sorts of money!

But this is part of what makes the economy bouyant. People are enticed to buy on credit and live beyond there current means, all boosting the GDP!

dazzlingd:
Most people in America don’t have savings you say?

Lol

Let me add to it,
Most of them are homeless and jobless

Not only don't they have savings, they OWE all sorts of money!

dazzlingd:
Monthly expense in Could be between 1,500 or more for a single person depending on the city.

And people can earn between 2k to 4k doing menial jobs. Being meticulous, you should be able to save 500 to 2k depending on your earnings and all. It all depends, some people may not be able to save anything.
Working professionally, you should be able to earn 5 to 10k in a mid level career or even more.
Some keep their expanses low to like 3k monthly while earning close to 10k, then can save between 2 to 7k monthly depending on lifestyle and city.
The larger your family, the less you can save but you are investing probably in your childrens education, mortgage etc which is still far better than Nigeria

All in all, it is far better off to hustle or work legitimately in the US than in Nigeria

This is all theoretical.
In real life this hypothetical person you referenced would be owing all sorts of credit cards, and paying off all sorts of things bought on credit, talkless of savings!

dazzlingd:
You are absolutely correct, better stay in Nigeria and hustle your naira there.
Live responsibly and if your are able to save 800k monthly and convert to dollars, by the end of the year, you should have close to 10k dollars in savings

All the best

Well, you have to take other things into consideration - like living conditions, health, electricity, etc.
But that doesn't negate the fact that most people in America have no savings whatsoever!! Heck you saw the numbers yourself. Did I make them up??
And not just statistics, survey after survey says the same thing!

JoeRusson:
See you have answered your question yourself. Also, there's nothing about easily avoided. When you're young, you're not desperate. Your parents or guidance can do due diligence and ask questions to the best of their abilities. If there's any difformity the man has, they will discover. This is different from an older woman they just want to leave the house even if she's going to marry a beast.

More over, in the past, there's the tradition of the woman going to the man's family house to stay for a week or more to get to know the man and his family. If after what she experiences there she decided to call off the marriage, no problem.

And you can continue to deceive yourself with your philosophical quotes about society, won't even bother myself with that.

I haven't answered my question. Let me put it to you a bit differently: what's another way for a girl to know a guy is ok down there without dating or some intimacy??
Has nothing to do with "due diligence"
There is nothing philosophical about what I said. It is pure common sense. You can never satisfy society
- "they". So if you let your peace be dependent on "they", you are in for one boring, unhappy ride!

ayinba1:
On the low end, remove 10% for taxes (assume include social security also)- $160
Phone $15 per month
Auto insurance or bus pass- $30
Electricity- $50
Water may be included in your rent- or not
Rent - $500
Toiletries- soap/toothpaste/laundry/dish soap/ sanitary pad - $20
Food - $0

Total low estimate monthly expenses = $775

This is based on an unrealistic low estimate, assuming that the individual is single, no car, no dependents, no state/city taxes and they spend $0 on food.

You can present a 2nd scenario where they work 2 jobs which would be 16hours out of a 24 hour day but saving all your salary is not practical in the US or in Nigeria. Someone has to pay your living expenses.

Kobicove:
Oga don't say what you don't know.

There is no way you can save $10,000 in just 3 months while doing menial jobs in the US! dazzlingd

You nailed it! Which is exactly why people live paycheck to paycheck - zero savings. See below

JoeRusson:
Hmmm, it how men says women are manipulators, when they're the greatest manipulators of all time. You alone mentioned society, because you know the role it plays in everyone lives. Secondly, sincere questions? What happened to the answers I've given before, what did you make out of them? So the married men in question that test a bit, its good you wrote most, not all. What do the rest do? What do the married men who wives widened after childbirth do? Let's all ask questions.

Society gets inside you only if you let it. You can train your mind such that your peace of mind is not dependent on society. Such that if you get married, fine; but if you never get married you'd fine too.
The rest of the men DIVORCE or compensate in other ways; so also childbirth. Different from getting into something that could have easily been avoided!

JoeRusson:
It's funny how you put this subtly like you don't know the peace of mind it brings. I have answered your question with another question because no matter the response I give, it won't be enough. Another question, what do married men do when they find out their wives hole doesn't fit?

@bolded, so you know your problem is peace of mind, which can only come from inside. So work on your mind instead of making marriage your sole life purpose! Heck, you've always been advised not to live your life for society or parents.
You don't answer sincere questions with questions, you offer suggestions.
As to married men, that's why most wish to test it a little bit in advance

JoeRusson:
It can't be a good answer for someone like you with sinister motives towards young girls. Marriage guarantees you a lot. You're under a protection, an umbrella. Your question, what if you find out they're not your type down there? Is that the basis of having plenty sexual partners to continue testing until you find your type? Do older women still think of type down there when they're now desperate for a man?

Has nothing to do with motives but with being realistic as to human nature. You are telling a person to be disciplined and starve to death amidst food she loves. And you don't guarantee her happiness down the road but marriage slavery.
No, marriage does not guarantee happiness at all nor does it guarantee lasting union. Only thing it guarantees is society and parents will leave you alone for the time being.
You were asked a simple question: what do you do if you find the person is a total disappointment to you down there?

JoeRusson:
If everyone wanted to satisfy their hunger, there'll be probably more murderers, ritualists, prostitutes and more social vices. What has stopped majority is discipline and focus. That's what girls should have. Discipline to refuse time wasters and focus to get married to eligible bachelors.

Ok. That's answer. Not a very good answer but an answer nonetheless. More like telling a hungry person to starve. Also begs a question: marriage does not guarantee anything - what if you find out they're not your type down there. What next?

JoeRusson:
I don't know where you want to take this conversation to and your plan for derailing this thread, but please stick to the topic which is avoid dating men. Only accept proposals not relationships. Whether he has money o, class o, six packs o, a reasonable woman who doesn't want to end up old and desperate should stop dating men. Keep yourself open for options. Don't be someone's property when he doesn't even know what your parents look like. Don't do this to your self because of unstable emotions. That boy you love today, you can hate with perfect hatred tomorrow. Don't sabotage your future because of unstable feelings. Don't wake up love before its time. It's for your own good.

You are the one derailing the thread. You were asked a simple question and requested to give a detailed answer: how do you advise girls to satisfy the natural almost irresistible hunger for intimacy and possibly love that is part of human nature and does not subside and wait for marriage??

JoeRusson:
Why did you mention them to buttress your point? The ones marrying a poor man with plenty wives are those who were charmed or were already considered old in their community. Then there is the case of women in some communities not having a say over who they marry. This post is about women who have a say. Don't come and mix up trashiness here.

My friend nobody is charmed (I know you are the type to believe that!). Women are attracted to certain conditions. If you have them women will be attracted to you, money or no money!

JoeRusson:
They have a problem waiting. If not the only disvirgined girls we will see are those that were raped, which is not the case. It's women who are strong on their stance, that can resist including caressing of breasts and let me put just the tip.

You people are not putting "LOVE" into the equation. People (especially girls) are emotional beings not calculative machines. Even in ancient Israel and Iran where the punishment for such sex is stonning to death!

JoeRusson:
You wrote about love, I wrote about how women only deal with attraction and the things that can attract them which doesn't include love. Then from your sorry ass theory of love, you ran to money, because deep in your heart, you know that's the only way to a woman's heart and not your pathetic quote about two people loving each other. Now you want to enter having other women, certain pedigree and certain things. Man, you're spinning like a ball, stop being silly. Let's take for example, men already having other women, does this include a poor man?

You are the one spinning like a top and misreading what I wrote. There are many men much richer than Oba and Ned. I mentioned them specifically to show you that women are attracted to certain conditions not just money. Yet you misread it.
There was a man with 86 wives. Was he rich? Another had 50 - a struggling native doctor. It's not jusr about money. Read with comprehension

JoeRusson:
Not love, attraction, which can be squashed the minute the remember they're going to spend their mid-30s feeding a man - the purpose of this post.

You are not dealing with real life. In the real world people's emotions (including girls) don't operate on basis of what will be happening in 15 years!

JoeRusson:
Women can control themselves. They can choose when to wake the love up and they can do that by saying no to dating. They will benefit more. Men are the ones pestering ladies day and night to sleep with them. The only time ladies begin to crave sex is if they started having it from a very young age, say 12 years. It's like training a child soldier. That's conditioning their mind.

Wrong! If a girl loves a guy (and they always end up loving a guy - usually someone who doesn't want her) they'll "mistakenly" end up sleeping with him. Even in places like Iran or old Israel where punishment for such sex is very severe!

JoeRusson:
You mentioned oba and ned. What were you implying?

They already have other women, they have a certain pedigree, certain things surround them. Those are the kind of things women are attracted to, but losers like you are focused on six pack and mind games

JoeRusson:
From love to money. Stay one place.

I never mentioned money, though money can be a key part of the equation. There are circumstances women are attracted to. That you already have other women is one of them. Money well deployed (not just money) is another!

JoeRusson:
Don't wake up love until it's time. Go and earn your love. Don't be a lazy man, doing nothing but developing sweet mouth to deceive a lady to become his sex machine in the name of love.

You have it all mixed up. Love happens, not something you wake up as you wish. Also nobody is anybody's sex machine. If you look closely you may find the girl enjoys and craves the sex more, never mind their games!

JoeRusson:
A girl can only be attracted to a handsome man, that six pack, fair or dark, 6 ft and above with red lips man. If she has dated strings of ugly men, she might want to use the guy and balance equation so that if there's any reason her past dating history comes up, she will have at least a handsome man in her books. Not because she is in love or that bullshit you wrote.

That being said, the topic is to encourage girls to stop dating men. If they think they're in love now with a man with no future bearing yet, they should also think of how gloomy their life will be when they are approaching 30 still clinging on to love with a man that can't afford his rent. No lady wants to be in that situation. So, now is the time to lay their bed right. Forget the so-called love that won't lead them to anywhere else than being called, 'Old, angry, bitter feminist with no feminine appeal.'

How you lay your bed determines how you will lie ladies!

Women are attracted to a man's circumstances, what surrounds him, his accomplishments, societal standing, much less all those things you mentioned.
That's why people like you can't get any cool women , while that Oba and Ned Nwoko marry 10 each!
It's so also in the animal world, women flock to the alpha males while the rest get nothing!

That being said, what's wrong with your assumptions is that in real life girls who date many men marry first, while the "good girl" you describe finish last!

Reminderz:
we are humans not animals... we think before we act. that's where self control comes in. you don't go sleeping around just because you have "feelings". do the needful.

Exactly! We are animals (albeit human animals) with a certain NATURE, NOT machines! If two people love each other, they'll have an irresistible urge to be inside each other, and eventually that'll happen. That's HUMAN NATURE, while marriage is just a societal construct!

JoeRusson:
Human beings or men? If you need fucking, double your hustle and go and marry. Don't keep a girl as a sex machine with promises of marriage. It's that simple!

Especially girls infact, including you! If a girl is in love with someone they'll end up seducing him. It's that simple!

Blue3k:
You can read the constitution yourself. Round 1 and two rules are the same. Sudden death round is a simple majority.



Don't trust guys who don't read the rules.

Knock out punch. No arguments on this again. QED

Blue3k:
Runoff off election between top two candidates. The rules remain the same for the runoff election. If nobody wins the runoff then it goes into another unoff election. The sudden death rules only require a simply majority to win.

muykem:
Rerun for the first two with highest votes.

Oh, ok. Suspected as much
Thanks

Hotty321:
But there's no way u can save all the money u make cos there's bills waiting for you when u collect money by the end of the month

Of course not. No way you can save half even.
But let's assume you save every penny, still won't have $10k in 3 months

Isn't all this too much work?

Besides, it doesn't really work like that.
If a guy is into you, just be reasonably clean and you'll turn him on.
If he's no longer into you for whatever reason, some of these may actually annoy him

JoeRusson:
Stop dating! If a man asks for a relationship, refuse. If he promises you marriage, ask when and ensure no sexual relationship exists within that time so no one gets hurt. Be assertive. Let him know nothing is happening until after the wedding. Men will want to cajole you, force you to shift your stance. When you think of compromising, also think of how you'll be 30+ begging for a marriage that may never happen. Don't let this men take you for a fool. Use your youth wisely.

Human beings need fucking and also love where possible. These feelings don't wait till you get married.
How will you be getting these while waiting?
Please give a detailed answer as I really want to know

What happens if no one achieves it. Anybody knows?

Simple: for whatever reason, SHE IS NOT INTO YOU!
MOVE ON!
Stop pining over someone who doesn't want you! Look elsewhere!
Clear enough??
Next time be sure a girl wants you b4 you "love" her.
Have some self-respect!