i wrote this for the OP, i believe you need it too;


The trajectory of your life is in your hands and if a gift is from God then as a man run your confirmations to avoid i thy know, this life is a mystery and a lot of men has made mistakes wen they find themselves with such ladies. Now that everything seem sweet and there is love endeavor to take her to church please, i repeat this life is very mysterious. Ladies like these can be very sweet,lovely and kind but when you do something that a little "I am sorry" can solve on a normal ground, you would be surprised the level of anger and revenge that would be meted on you. I repeat this life is very mysterious, do not play with it.

Another thing is, they can be very very patient, the spirit operating can hide within for many years and when they are sure you are very very weak spiritually they would begin to manifest and that is when you see a man would start running from one church to the other seeking for deliverance upon his life. Do not take this for granted, ask questions from elders if in doubt and you know what i am talking about.
I am in no way disregarding the opinion of those that said it could be a medical condition but that too can be a mirage so you get distracted from dealing with the main point.
I would say this again, this life is very mysterious.

TonyBankz:
Op listen to me...if am right you're wife is similar to my girlfriend who is my wife to be soon...
She is not an ogbanje, she is gifted. Believe me
When I met my girl..I was a boy learning catapillar operating.we met and fell in love instantly.
Ever since we started dating good things have been coming to me..my boss promoted me from a boy to fully paid operator with a caterpillar and a boy to work for me.
She has this similar things you talked about just like your wife.
Sometimes when I get back from work,she will tell me,baby am so tired, I have worked alot today...(she is not employed yet cus she just finished her waec and she wants to learn work) and I will ask her which work...she go explain tire.. about people she worked for to get them healed of spiritual problems and so on and so forth...she complains of headache, stomach pain and chest pain...she doesn't take medicine or anything... automatically she gets well....
Everything thing concerning her goes well... anything I want to do and she is involved money go dey, everything dey go well
She helped me stop my smoking habit...I was a chain smoker..sold drugs in my past life
But when I met this girl she told me she loved me for everything I am but you see this smoking I must stop am..My mama Don try to stop my smoking habit even friends,pastor and my boss.
But I doesn't listen to people
Am always on outside work due to the nature of my caterpillar work.. sometimes I might be in the bunk smoking things and things..my girl will call me and ask me where I dey...when I try to lie or cook up some stories she will tell me the exact amount of weed and cigarettes on me at that moment...I go laugh and at the same time marveled at this girl..she told me she won't leave me even though she doesn't like people who smoke knowing that I will put an end to it one day.one day I just quit everything smoking and she stopped complaining,I asked how does she know I have totally stoped and she told me if I was still smoking,she would still know even if am far away.
Me am a spiritually gifted like her and that made me understand that my girl was also gifted too..and was sent to help me.
Of all the girls have dated she is better than all...in character and loving..this girl love me scatter, she can do anything I ask her to do
Her mother told me when we started dating to be patient that I will enjoy her daughter, that she is gifted...
Am 6 years older than her..she just graduated from secondary school this July but this girl doesn't act like a 17 years old girl..she is even acts matured that all the older girls I have dated.
We both feel like we are married already and she keeps telling me not worry about anything..that God has blessed me already.
So brother OP don't fear or worry that your wife is ogbanje...I don't know but if things get out of hand take her to church with Genuine altar.
God bless you

How is everything going at home. I read your post and i would tell you this for free, you have to hold God very very strong.
it might seem as something little initially but when the manifestations start to play out you would be so shocked, she has subtly old you who she is and the best time to tackle it is now when she still has love for you, if it is a medical condition please do well to tackle it but if it is a spiritual affiliations please look for a deliverance minister and fight the battle while it is still early (i would recommend Mountain of Fire MInisteries).
On no account should you play with your christian life, do not slack in this aspect because their modus is to present a man with what seem like love, then they attack his Spiritual life, then his fiance, his health, his mentals and if the man is not spiritually strong he might die in the process.

The trajectory of your life is in your hands and if a gift is from God then as a man run your confirmations to avoid i thy know, this life is a mystery and a lot of men has made mistakes wen they find themselves with such ladies. Now that everything seem sweet and there is love endeavor to take her to church please, i repeat this life is very mysterious. Ladies like these can be very sweet,lovely and kind but when you do something that a little "I am sorry" can solve on a normal ground, you would be surprised the level of anger and revenge that would be meted on you. I repeat this life is very mysterious, do not play with it.

Another thing is, they can be very very patient, the spirit operating can hide within for many years and when they are sure you are very very weak spiritually they would begin to manifest and that is when you see a man would start running from one church to the other seeking for deliverance upon his life. Do not take this for granted, ask questions from elders if in doubt and you know what i am talking about.
I am in no way disregarding the opinion of those that said it could be a medical condition but that too can be a mirage so you get distracted from dealing with the main point.
I would say this again, this life is very mysterious.

Wannabenz:
*I'm not having any financial issues Oo I'm doing well for myself contrary to what I read here on nairaland about Ogbanje before creating this post.

*I met this girl last year in my village, she helped me by telling me elderly men that I should avoid because they're evil. Those men was actually flocking to me because of the project at hand at the time. I started having interest on her and then I noticed she has spiritual power, they do reveal to her who's sick and what to do for the person to get better. I wasn't suspecting her to be an Ogbanje untill what happened few days ago.

...to continue later,she just entered the room I'm in right now.

Please follw your dreams regardless the age. 5yrs from today you would still feel empty if you do not achieve this goal.
You can do this!!!

opicgif:
i want to go back to school
to study law
ive always wanted to do this but felt i would be too old
as of last year, ive seen a lot of older people graduating or in law school
rotimi amaechi is an example

which private university can i go to, and still live off campus with my family
i am in rivers state
i am excluding RSU and Uniport,
i would want to carry out this endeavour without delay from ASUU strikes

any suggestions?

Shut up!!! and appreciate the selfless effort.

Razakki1:
it's like Npower is paying you to spread false hope while they keep enriching themselves with beneficiaries salary.

I just saw October and December Npower Alert.
So surprising cause I nonchalantly registered in 2020 and did online verification some months ago. Wasn't even expecting anything.

Please what's the update are more payments to be expected or that's the end ?

ezenwaez:


Npower News Today Tuesday 1st August 2023


According to Npower news today Tuesday 1st August 2023, Npower batch c seeing invalid email and password error message when attempting to login into their Npower portal, Npower batch c with empty Npower payroll on their Npower portal and Npower batch c with blank names and only surname in the place of middle name should kindly observe their Npower portal for a while as this is a technical error and Npower technical team is aware and working to resolve the error on the Npower portal.

According to Npower news today, Npower batch c beneficiaries are not to update their information on the Npower portal, Npower batch c are to kindly observe their Npower portal for a while.

According to Npower news, Npower batch c beneficiaries that were once npower beneficiaries but now turned to Npower applicants on their Npower portal are to kindly observe their nasims dashboard for a while as it is a technical error.

Lastly according to Npower news today on payment, Npower batch c stream 2 beneficiaries should kindly note that payment for the months of January to June has not been initiated yet.

Even your beloved USA has an office of the first lady so what's the joke ?

Ihateheadslamer:
Since from the time immemorial the office of the Nigeria first lady remains the jokes of the centuries

.

Try to mind your business. This Simple advice might not seem important now but with time you would see the relevance.

Gboom:
That is a terrible and irresponsible act.
Is he ashamed of his family or he is just callous?

I remembered a man in those days when I was a bachelor, I used to go to one Igbo canteen and anytime I see this man, he always eating goatmeat peppered soup and malt. Jokingly, I saw the wife one day and told her to learn how to prepare peppered soup so that the amount the husband is spending for the peppered soup will be reduced thinking he always buy for his family too. The wife just laughed and said, the husband only enjoys himself without considering her and their two children then. I was amazed because the man is a leader in the church and from that day, the man lost the respect I have for him.

You know Frank personally?
I knew him in Etete, he was a close neighbour.
A very hardworking and church dude who was upright in character and mannerism, he has done some electrical jobs for my dad and his death was such an avoidable one.
May his soul rest in peace.

Broskyjames:
The cables were off when he climbed the ladder, someone deliberately put it on. He has had same encounter about 4 times this year alone, infact he gave thanksgiving in Church just 3 weeks ago, praising God for sparing his life from this exact situation.

If only you guys allowed him study his choice course computer science all these would have been avoided.
His choice is one of the leading courses in the world right now and he would have still have a chance to work in Pharmaceutical Industry even as a Computer Scientist.

His Father decision to send boys to pick him up to beat him severally Has only resolved to destroying his self esteem and confidence, that boy is Traumatised believe him and you guys has forced him into Introverted lifestyle thus the reason why he looks forward to moving out and never coming back because he feels imprisoned inside that house.

You as the Mother it seems you played little role while your husband makes these life altering decisions.
It's not too late, seat that boy down and try to talk him out of introvercy because he is drowning deep down into the abyss of "what should be" this might alter his perception of reality and everything around him would seem like an Illusion.
Take out time to talk with your Son, take him out of the home and seat out in a comforting environ and speak/talk with him deeply. He needs a friend right about now, discuss with him as a home and he would reveal the deep secrets of his heart.

I bet you haven't asked him how he feels about all that has happened all these years, Remember if he studies Computer science or Pharmacy or Play Football it is HIS LIFE and he has a Say in it while you guys guide him in the right path to achieve his life goals.

Talk to that boy before it is too late.

Shalom

booksbo0k:
Sorry for the long write up my people, I need advice.

My first son has been behaving somehow in our family, as if he's not part of this family...
You and this boy can be in the same house but you might not set your eyes on him once for a whole day. He will be inside his room through out...

He has been telling me that he is currently working on going to rent his own place and live on his own and that if God helps him and he is able to achieve that, He will not have anything to do with our family again and that we will never set eyes on him ever again :[ ...

I would have not been bothered by such statement if it were coming from someone else, I would take it as a bluff. But this my son is someone that normally doesn't call people to check on them, not even us his parents..

When he was in his previous University before he dropped out, this boy can go for months, that is a whole semester stretch without calling anybody to know how you're doing, except you call him or maybe he wants to ask for money for something or school stuff....

We have five children and he is the first, the second and third children are away in University, he and the two last siblings are the only one's with us.. My husband refused him from going to University in a far place instead he gives him transport money to be going to his own University from home everyday...... He and his father don't even talk again except good morning greetings. He is only 21 ohh..

Let me give you guys small back story so that you can understand how all these things started.

My son graduated from secondary school (a boarding school) in 2017 at 16 years old... Initially, he said he wanted to study computer science as he said that was the course he loved and wanted to study. But my husband refused and persuaded him to study pharmacy because he worked at NAFDAC and he saw the way pharmacy graduates were living at his work place and the salary they were recieving. He and one of his chemist friend sweet talked him into going to study the course and I guess it was because he was young then and could not challenge his dad then that was why he gave in....

He wrote JAMB but he did not meet the cut of mark for pharmacy (but I later realised his score was good for computer science then)... No public University was willing to admit him for pharmacy then because his score was not good for the course but due to my husband love for the course and not wanting my son to lose admission that year , he decided to go the way of private University not minding their school fees...Long story cut short, my son got admitted into Madonna University where we were paying 1M naira every year.....After 3 years in the school and in 300L @18 years old, he began saying he was not interested in the school any longer, that he was tired of the course, that he's body is no longer in the school and blablabla that he wants to go and play football in Europe...

He came back for holiday during the beginning of covid and refused to go back to the school when they resumed, saying that he was only wasting our money by being in that school and he did not want to continue.....This got my husband really sad and angry....My son stayed home for almost two years doing nothing because my husband was adamant that if he would not go back to school, nothing for him, that all the money he has spent for school fees in that school can not be for waste that he can become a footballer after he graduates, saying no one can become a successful footballer without being a graduate, that it would later affect them in life...

But my son refused. I must confess, my son is extremely good at playing football. That was the talent i can confidently say that God personally gave to him from birth. Infact when he was graduating from secondary school, they gave him the award for the best graduating footballer and he was always the centre of attention anytime he plays at our church events. He friends used to call him "nima" then, I think...

I and my husband got tired of him staying at home for long so I went to meet with one pastor in our street who was based in the UK with his family but comes home sometimes for church related matters. I explained my son's situation to him and he offered to help my son travel out to chase his football career provided we have the funds for it. The man was secondary school class mates with "victor ikpe ekong" who was a former super eagles player but currently a pastor in Sweden. To my greatest surprise he called him on a WhatsApp video call in my presence and i was really surprised...He gave me the man's phone number to keep in contact and also scheduled a day to meet with my husband and have a discussion.. I told my son and he was very happy..I also told my husband and he was eager to meet with him at least, anything to solve my sons idleness at the time..

The pastor came to my our house on several occasions and discussed with my husband. My husband kept telling the pastor, saying he would like my son to be going to school while chasing his football career at the same time, a feat which pastor let us know would be difficult as one has to be dropped for the other. Unfortunately, my husband changed he's mind and said he was no longer interested in the whole footballer thing. He said he knew that my son wanted to become a footballer only because of girls. That he, my son knew that if he becomes a footballer, all the girls would like him, that that was the only reason he wanted to become a footballer, and that if football was his true destiny, he doesn't need to travel out for it to manifest, that he can be in Nigeria and make it from here.....That was how that chapter close like that. Pastor left for England few months after.....

After years of my son staying at home, my husband got tired. One night, he hired some Street thugs to come take my son away and beat him up...my son stayed with them for 2 weeks. When he returned, he said he was ready to go back to school. But my husband told him he won't be going back to any private University again. My son wrote jamb again to study computer science and was admitted into COOU. but my said he would not allow him go to any University that is not in the same state we are residing. Now the problem here was that all the public schools in the state we are staying will not accept you to study computer science unless you did chemistry in jamb. And my son did not do chemistry in jamb because he is not good in chemistry. If he was to study in the same state we were staying, he had to settle for another course, which he did...Now another problem arose. My husband refused to rent an apartment for my son around the school because the school is considerably far from our house, instead he decided to be giving him money (2000) everyday as transport fare to be going from home. This did not sit down well with my the boy and he again, said he was no longer interested in schooling again sef that he can't be going such far distance from home to the school everyday to study a Course he does not even like siting that it would be stressful and affect his academics and that it was unwise to be paying 60k a year as school fees while you spend 2k everyday as transport..My husband got angry and called on our estate CSO to come pick him up. They beat him so badly in public that when he got back home later in the evening, I went to check him in his room, his buttocks and back where scarred and red with huge marks...

Ever since, he has been going to the school from home and he has become very distant from us especially his dad. They don't talk again in the same house except "good morning sir"...

My son has turned into something else. He can stay indoors from morning till night. I would have said he has started keeping bad company but he does not even have a single friend, not one..Nobody calls him, and he doesn't call anybody...I have five children and he is the first. The second and third already gained admission this year in a private University and are in school currently, so he and he's last two siblings are the only one's with us now..

Why I'm writing this is because I'm scared..I'm beginning to fear that my son might commit suicide, he's beginning to show that kind of attitude.. And the plans he have to leave us forever to go and stay alone, I don't like it ohhhh...

Nairalanders please I need your advice.

One thing is for sure, his name is not Paul Peter (she made that name up so you would never know your Father's name).
They probably had misunderstanding that made her take this stance all these years (not cool).
I pray you find your dad and make up for the Lost years.
Also try using Twitter to expand your possibilities.

Yedidea:
I'm Solomon an Ibgo from my father's side,and my mom is a Ghanaian, My mom took me from Nigeria to Ghana ( UNAWARE ) of my father as I was a baby so I have never seen my own biological father ever since Born, and I have tried all humanly possible means to find him but not avail, my mom have declined to tell me every Truth about my father, after all my pressure on her to tell me where my dad is until now no good answer from her, but I'm desperately want to see my dad.

The only information I have about Him is- my mom told me that His name is Paul Peter She said she has forgotten the sir name of my Dad, and she has also forgot the Nigeria state my dad comes from , My Dad was then a mechanical engineer in Lagos in assembling excavators ect..there was a pictures proofing that but she seized it, and she failed to tell me.

The Company name, I have my father's very old picture with me, posted with my mom, I'm now at age but I sincerely want everyone who will come across my massage join the searching help till I find my real family, my mom name is Grace , that was the name my Dad was aware of.

Please my precious reader help me found my dad and my home back in Nigeria, this is my Ghanaian number for call and WhatsApp -+233553121901 , God bless you and your family for helping me Amen.

I saw this car recently and it draws attention.
Awesome looking ride

uzohrome:
Make Toyota
Model C-HR limited
Year 2019
Status few months reg with 13k mileage
Price #19m

Be patient, maybe he is trying to surprise you with either a Car or Breakfast.
Only time would tell..

Goodlady:
He's not picking my calls cos I told him I wanted a car as val gift.
I just told him how I had a busy schedule last week and I wasted lots of money oh tfare plus the stress in entering cabs.
We were discussing and I mentioned I wish I had a car and we just talked normally.
Since last Friday, I v been trying to reach him but he's not picking my phone.
I called his friend to ask after him. He called back n told me he's going to check on me but he hasn't.
Why is he acting like he doesn't care?
Could my instinct be right that he's trying to run cos I mentioned I wanted car?

Lengthy write up, well we would get back to this after the Election.

Hopium:
Something is really wrong with obidients.

You guys should be ashamed, tbh. Seriously, this isn't the time for bants. Let's be honest with ourselves.

In what world do you think you can defeat Asiwaju in Nigeria, talkless of Lagos? You guys overhyped yourself with social media noise and blinded yourselves to reality. Forget all the jamboree, psquare performance, Alaba display; una flop big time.

Lagos was meant to be the climax of the Peter-Datti campaign; your Ebonyi rally was better than today's show of shame 10x. You're going to lose a big chunks of undecided votes and voters already in your camp who just want to vote candidates they think will win for the bragging right.

The most painful thing is that reality still hasn't dawn on you. Obidients had a lot of fun at TBS today, no argument - but that's the only positive they're taking home forgetting they've proved they don't have the number to own Lagos or displace city boy. When people say Obidients are all about hype and vibes, una go dey deflect. I was there today - majority there were more concerned about IG reels and twitter videos to gain clout on SM. When the old guard say you're not ready, don't argue with them.

Lagos was meant to be stronghold of the obi movement. What a shame!

Una flop at ABJ last few days and the excuse was that your members were at work; that why the rally was scanty. Today nko? Today is sha Saturday and Lasgidi has the highest number of social media users in Nigeria. So what was the problem?

TBS has a capacity of 50,000; the population today plus the Igbo traders of Alaba was barely 10% of the capacity. For Lagos oooo. So una no fit get 50,000 people to fill TBS on a Saturday but are saying LP will win Lagos? Na that Gbadebo boy I pity - remove the Obi fan craze and what's left for him as voters strength is nothing. But sha that one na guy man. He's also catching cruise.

Is it delusional or denial? - they're still jumping up and down saying they will chase Aiswaju away from Lagos.

I think it has been put to rest that structure matters in politics. But being the stubborn collective that they are, they will still argue. Your beating and disgrace is waiting on 25th.

Even Sanwo-Olu rally at Onikan today by Lagos waste workers only was better than theis oversized TBS show x2.

Obidients, make una dey shame small small.

Meanwhile, Tinubu will be ending his political rally in Lagos .
Atiku will be ending his Political rally in Adamawa.
Even Sowore is ending his political rally in Ondo.
Only the fraud among them cannot go and end his rally in Anambra, he will be ending it in Lagos.

What most men are looking for is what you are complaining for.
Your wife is close to your mum, your plan is to find a way to manage it to your advantage.
Your mum knows what is good for you, your wife I presume also desire what is best for you (I am not disputing the fact that you know what is good for yourself also).
Please this combination is to your advantage, it's rare these days and a golden opportunity, use it well.

You are an offshore worker, the challenges sposues left at home by offshore workers face are numerous, yours is close to your mother, you should be in church doing Thanksgiving.

Make peace with both of them and enjoy what God has blessed your home with because some homes are looking for this friendship between Mum & wide but can't seem to find it.

destiny4luv:
Good day Nairalanders.l; let me go straight to the point. I work off-shore so most of the times I am not always around, some times I can be at work for three months and be given one or two weeks time- off that's just the nature of my job.

But they is something troubling me seriously, when I give my wife instructions regarding anything at all she will first of all ask my Mom before she carries out the instruction I give her, that's if my Mom is in support of the instruction. Recently I gave her an instruction regarding a particular matter while I was on time-off, only for my wife to call me fee weeks later that she has carried out the instruction when the time I told her to carry out that instruction is not yet. I was so mad at her I asked her why can't she wait till the time I told her to do it; she said my Mom came over to the house and told her to do it so she did it. At that point I cut the call.

Later that day my Mom called me and was asking why I cut the call on my wife and refused to pick her call even why she was calling back, I told her she was the course, and she said how, and I told her why will I give my wife instruction and u will come to counter that instruction without the both of u letting me know not after the did has been done. My Mom was angry that can't she have say in my home, I told her to an extent not to the point of countering my instructions. She was very angry we both had some argument on the phone before I told her am late for work I want to cut and she hang up, she knows I was seriously angry with her. Since that day she hasn't called me and I haven't called her too.

My wife called me and apologized that it won't happen again. I forgive her and we both made amend. Now my Mom is not talking to me and my wife at the moment. Please what I did was it wrong or did I over reacted?

I love and respect my Mom likewise my wife, but I won't want her to control my home for me. Should I call her and apologize to her or just let her be till her mind comes down?

Why are Nigerian Homes predominantly built with bricks and not wood like you illustrated.
Is there a Geographical Reason to this?

whiteboyswag:
And this is my end product

I was about typing something then I saw your name is AngryGoat.
No doubt, you are an Angry Goat.

Angrygoat:
They are poor. Run away. See the wretched house. Not even apples or juice. Your gf family are poor and im sure they must be afonjas.

For you to be concerned about this her attitude means it has really gotten to you.
This is a red flag and from her exhibitions there is a possibility she would restrict family members to visit you and you visiting them, all these may be coming from a place of insecurity on her part.
At a time like this she is suppose to be a bonding figure between you and your siblings and she is suppose to think of how to blend into your family instead is is already creating boundaries.

Well, it is said that he who the cap fits let him wear it, all men wears shoe but only the bearers knows where pinches.
Obviously, your sister feels comfortable with you from your narrative and as old Adage goes, Blood is thicker than water.

Reflect on this, would you want to enter a marriage with someone that would isolate you from your family or would you want to be in marriage with someone that would even strengthen the Bond you have with your family and hers as well. Your sincere answer to this question should be a beaming light in your path of conclusions.

Slime7:
Hi guys,
I need your advice on this. It is causing issues in my 2 years relationship.
I came to Lagos in 2018 after my NYSC. Prior to that, I had plans for my older sister to come stay with me, considering how difficult things were.
Note that my married eldest brother was in Lagos before then. I understand that maybe he needs his privacy, but he didn't help in any way (he didn't have to).
 
When I got the apartment, I met my girlfriend while she was serving in Lagos. My older sister has yet to move in with me, but I have mentioned to her not once but twice that she will soon come and live with me.
 
I will also like to mention that my elder sister was living with her boyfriend before I came to Lagos. This doesn't seem right to me or to her.
 
She moved in, and we were living together peacefully. Along the way, she broke up with her boyfriend. About 6 months later, she got into another relationship. The man seems interested in marrying her. And they were making plans for settling down. Unfortunately, she got pregnant out of wedlock for the man. She had to move in with the man.
 
Now this is where the issues begin. After a few months (after her childbirth), they always have issues. They go on and off. Two times they had issues; she carried her bag and came to my place. Two times it happened, and she stayed with me for not more than two months put together. This didn't go well with my girlfriend. She complained that my sister is always in the picture, and she doesn't like that.
 
The third time, the man abused my sister, and he beat her up. I went to the man's house with my "married eldest brother." We fought with the man and threatened to arrest him. He pleaded, plus the neighbors and the landlord too. That night, we took my sister away from him. My sister chose to stay at my place until she gets an apartment for herself and her kid.

This really annoyed my girlfriend. She always says things like, "My family does not respect me." That's why my sister can move in to my house knowing that I am in a relationship.
"Why does she like to stay with me and not my brother?" "Why do I have to always be the one to bear the burden?" Note that my sister works, and she can take care of herself and her kid. She just needed a place to stay until she got her own apartment.

She feared that my sister could just move in with her bags when we get married, which I have assured her is not possible.
She claims she likes her space and all. She claims she doesn't like the "on and off" as sometimes she may want to spend a "lone" time with me. Spend weekends... and this won't be possible when my sister is around.
She claims that she has never seen a scenario where an older sister with a kid is leaving with younger brother.
She always give instances where she has never seen guys in relationships allow their older sister to come stay with them.
She claimed that sometimes I should "man up" and say NO to her. 
 
Is she overreacting? What did I do wrong in all of this? Am I being manipulated? Is her anger justified?
 
N.B My sister has gotten a place for herself and has moved out.

You need to leave that space before you are forcefully initiated into what you do not want or you are killed due to mistaken identity during war.

As for the girl, you can find an elderly neighbour to talk with her in confidence and remove you from the conversation.

Your stay in that house is at your own peril, when a bullet has entered your end or your chest, there is no coming back to say "if I had known"

Otitipupa:
She has been staying with us for over a month now. I don’t even know how they met each other, he just brought her one day and introduced her as his girlfriend.

I have tried to tell him it’s wrong being with an underaged girl but he told me to mind my business. I can’t say much to him because I don’t have a job and I’m squatting with him. He is the one feeding me and giving me money to go for interviews.

He is treating the girl really bad. I sleep on the floor while they sleep on the bed. One night, he wanted to have his way with her and the girl said she was tired. I heard him tell her that she is not a real woman that is always ready to please her man. He threatened her he won’t marry her again. She told him she is sorry and allowed him.

He has slapped her 2 times in my presence. He is treating her like a slave. I am afraid to advice the girl to go back home as she might tell him.

The guy is a notorious cultist and I don’t want to step on his toes. Please how do I report this matter anonymously to the right authorities without it backfiring me.

We stay in a akwaibom

Flee

The reason she is so desperate to remove the pregnancy is because it is not yours, and she wants you to take charge of the abortion so the guilt of abortion would rest on your shoulders.

She carried out the test and never saw the need to let you know yet the words dropped from her mouth in the midst of an altercation. Wow

Insist on carrying a test, and I bet you this would cause a fracas from her.
Two things are involved, either she isn't pregnant or she is but the pregnancy isn't yours.
From what you have written, she only sees you as a meal ticket but her heart isn't with you.

In our local parlance, she just de use you!!!

Alesa3341:
Hello Guys, please I need a sincere and matured advise on what to do. This will be long, please bare with me.

I'm 27, am a businessman, I have this girl I really love so much and intend to marry her this year December, but one thing about her is her bad character. She challenge me, talk back at me, shout at me, get angry with me for days, refuse to cook when she is angry, disrespect my family, most especially my mum, always trying to paint herself good and paint me bad in presence of people, these are just little of the things she has done to me.

When she lost her job, and had nowhere to go, I had to bring her to my house, and provide everything for her, food, I change her hair twice a month, subscribe unlimited for her, I just provided everything a woman need to be happy for her. Last year November, she told me she haven't seen her mum for 5years and wanted to travel to see her, I spent close to 200k to take her to and fro, including other things she needed. She insisted on collecting the bride price list for me when coming back, I spoke to her mum and they gave her to give me. I was planning to finalize all on the weeding this year.

Last year DECEMBER, I took her to my family to introduce her, but this was the biggest mistake of my life. She was completely disrespectful to my mum, talks to me anyhow in presence of anyone, even to the extent of refusing to cook for me anytime she is angry, I go to kitchen and prepare food myself.

I love this girl so much but I still thought of continuing, with all this attitudes, I advise her everyday, I also took her to my pastor who advise her too most of the times, but she never changes.

Fast forward to 2days ago, we had issues because she told me to join her in washing and I refused because I was working on a client project, she got angry, washed the clothes and when it was evening she brought the clothes inside, folded her own in the wardrobe and just threw mine into the wardrobe without folding or arranging them. I was angry about this, but I kept mute. The next day, she sent me "sorry" on WhatsApp, I told her to come to me physically and apologize but she told me she can never do that, and why was she even apologizing, that she did nothing wrong, we exchanged words and she left my house.

Today, she called me and told me she is pregnant, and that I should send her money to remove it. I was like "just like that"? We didn't discuss about it, how will you just tell me you want to terminate my pregnancy, I told her to go to hospital and confirm it and also get the test report, she did this and sent to me, it was true she is pregnant, but she insisted on removing it, I persuaded her and she still refused, claiming she can't be a single mother. I told her I will take responsibility, but she insisted on removing it, I told her to go home and think about it, and she told me she can't leave there without removing it. After so much persuading I decided to give her the money, and told her if she removed it, that it's on her, that I didn't consent to this.

I asked her why we can't keep it, and she said because my family is bad, we support evil, if the sky is blue, we say it's red, that my mother is a bad woman, and she doesn't want to come there. She said so many bad things about my family, I was shocked! I asked her, how are they bad, she said "how can my mother be telling her to wash my clothes" I was just confused, After all I have done for you, is it bad if you wash your husband to be clothes, I left her!

Later she told me the doctor referred her to another hospital, I still tried to persuade her and she said her decision is final. She asked me to give her money to go to the hospital she was referred to, I refused! I insisted that we keep the baby, she told me "I'm a nobody, that she will call now and she will get money to go" I angrily blocked her. Later, she called my other line and told me, she went to the other hospital and the doctor told her, the cost to remove the pregnancy is 125k, she told me and I insisted on keeping the baby.

Please guys help.me, I don't want to terminate my first child, the girl is too disrespectful and rude, I don't want to continue with such woman, but she is carrying my baby, what do I do? And if she later agree to keep it, how do I go about it?

You all are just saying "don't marry her" what about the baby? Should I agree to abort it and give her the money?

MODIFIED

Young man, emphasis on the "Youngman"
Many men wished they saw these signs she is giving you on platter of gold before getting married but you are seeing it clearly like the sun brightens the day and you still feign confusion.
Young man, emphasis on the "Youngman" once again, if you know what's good for you, your future, your sanity, your finance, your relationship with your family, your well being, your health, your composure, your pride, your ego, your self respect and more Flee from her and flee like you are being chased by a wild beast.

Youngman, emphasis on the "Youngman" once again, you have a great future ahead of, a bright one so do not let a mistake of today mar and tarnish what lies ahead of you.
I wouldn't be surprised if she isn't pregnant.
You never mentioned her relationship with her Dad, as well as the relationship her mum has with her dad (use this variable as a factor because if you make the mistake of wifeing her, there is a probability that's how you would be treated).

She doesn't respect your Mum, even under your Father's roof, she doesn't respect you even under your roof, she doesn't see the need to apologize even when she is wrong, she talks down on you at every slight provocation, all these coming from someone that doesn't input progressive contributions to your life other than say sexual pleasure and probably cooking of food (which as you claim she holds hostage when she isn't at peace with you).
Yet you say you are still in love, the Lord has shown you these signs through her outright exhibitions.

Use your head and do what is right.

Alesa3341:
Hello
Guys, please I need a sincere and matured advise on what to do. This will be long, please bare with me.

I'm 27, am a businessman, I have this girl I really love so much and intend to marry her this year December, but one thing about her is her bad character. She challenge me, talk back at me, shout at me, get angry with me for days, refuse to cook when she is angry, disrespect my family, most especially my mum, always trying to paint herself good and paint me bad in presence of people, these are just little of the things she has done to me.

When she lost her job, and had nowhere to go, I had to bring her to my house, and provide everything for her, food, I change her hair twice a month, subscribe unlimited for her, I just provided everything a woman need to be happy for her. Last year November, she told me she haven't seen her mum for 5years and wanted to travel to see her, I spent close to 200k to take her to and fro, including other things she needed. She insisted on collecting the bride price list for me when coming back, I spoke to her mum and they gave her to give me. I was planning to finalize all on the weeding this year.

Last year DECEMBER, I took her to my family to introduce her, but this was the biggest mistake of my life. She was completely disrespectful to my mum, talks to me anyhow in presence of anyone, even to the extent of refusing to cook for me anytime she is angry, I go to kitchen and prepare food myself.

I love this girl so much but I still thought of continuing, with all this attitudes, I advise her everyday, I also took her to my pastor who advise her too most of the times, but she never changes.

Fast forward to 2days ago, we had issues because she told me to join her in washing and I refused because I was working on a client project, she got angry, washed the clothes and when it was evening she brought the clothes inside, folded her own in the wardrobe and just threw mine into the wardrobe without folding or arranging them. I was angry about this, but I kept mute. The next day, she sent me "sorry" on WhatsApp, I told her to come to me physically and apologize but she told me she can never do that, and why was she even apologizing, that she did nothing wrong, we exchanged words and she left my house.

Today, she called me and told me she is pregnant, and that I should send her money to remove it. I was like "just like that"? We didn't discuss about it, how will you just tell me you want to terminate my pregnancy, I told her to go to hospital and confirm it and also get the test report, she did this and sent to me, it was true she is pregnant, but she insisted on removing it, I persuaded her and she still refused, claiming she can't be a single mother. I told her I will take responsibility, but she insisted on removing it, I told her to go home and think about it, and she told me she can't leave there without removing it. After so much persuading I decided to give her the money, and told her if she removed it, that it's on her, that I didn't consent to this.

I asked her why we can't keep it, and she said because my family is bad, we support evil, if the sky is blue, we say it's red, that my mother is a bad woman, and she doesn't want to come there. She said so many bad things about my family, I was shocked! I asked her, how are they bad, she said "how can my mother be telling her to wash my clothes" I was just confused, After all I have done for you, is it bad if you wash your husband to be clothes, I left her!

Later she told me the doctor referred her to another hospital, I still tried to persuade her and she said her decision is final. She asked me to give her money to go to the hospital she was referred to, I refused! I insisted that we keep the baby, she told me "I'm a nobody, that she will call now and she will get money to go" I angrily blocked her. Later, she called my other line and told me, she went to the other hospital and the doctor told her, the cost to remove the pregnancy is 125k, she told me and I insisted on keeping the baby.

Please guys help.me, I don't want to terminate my first child, the girl is too disrespectful and rude, I don't want to continue with such woman, but she is carrying my baby, what do I do? And if she later agree to keep it, how do I go about it?

You all are just saying "don't marry her" what about the baby? Should I agree to abort it and give her the money?

MODIFIED

Start what you can finish.

Kswine:
Please what is this thing about mother in-law and daughter in-law that doesn’t make them get along?

Am in the middle an issue and don’t know how to proceed, let me tell you how it all started.

I’m the first born of my family, my father left us with my mom and marry another woman. To assist my mom I had to get a part time job while still in secondary school and this really affect my life.

Fast forward to 5 years ago I met my wife and we begin dating, during this time I won’t lie I saw some red flags about her family but was hoping things will change along the line. Her mom is a prophetess in a white garment church, she said my wife was her favorite in all her children. I didn’t count it because I see it as a normal thing for a mother to love her child endlessly.

To cut the long story short, last year my babe got pregnant and we decided to introduce both families and after that she will go stay with my mom for a while because am not always around and she need someone at home with her.

Now during this time mom do complain that she’s not free and do isolate herself from the rest of the family, on many occasion I’ll sit her down and we talk things out only for it to repeat itself.

On the second month of her stay with my mom I told her to go visit her mom maybe when she comes back things will be better, my wife got to her house and told her mom all sort of things and the next thing she and her mom started insulting my mom. All this thing happened around March this year and since then they have been begging because I told her nothing will make me marry her again.

Family meeting upon family meeting has been going on and at the end they want me to forgive her and bring her home which my mom insist.

Now I don’t want to look like a weak man because she and her family went too far by insulting someone I love and cherish and on the other hand I don’t want my daughter to grow up without a father figure in her life, so I don’t know what to do.

Please no insult

So if your husband hadn't given you this money how would they have paid his school fees?

This is yet another reason why it is important to be discreet with some information, if she wasn't aware that your husband gave you such sum she wouldn't have any reason to ask you.

Kdsml:
Merry xmas every1. Hope you all are having a great night. I nid advice pls

I am married with a kid, my husband traveled out of the country for a greener pasture, I moved out of our rented house and relocated back to my mom's place.

We had sold our properties for 300k he told me he doesn't know how long it will take him to get a job in the new country and I should use the 300k to start up a business so i will be able to take care of our daughter until he will be stable in the new country.

I have decided to start selling foodstuffs in the front of the house and i will use the remaining money for my daughter school fees in January.

My mom asked me to borrow her 120k to pay for my brother school fee and i refused explaining to her why i can't give her the money and she has been giving attitudes and refused to speak to me, i went to the market today i bought xmas clothes for my daughter and a wrapper for my mom she rejected it.

I know she is doing all this for me to give her the money but i will not give it to her no matter what. I don't understand why she is angry when she knows that my husband is not around i should use the money wisely because if i am broke i have no one else to help me.

Am i wrong for refusing to help her?

You must be clowning...lol

occfx:


May be she is dragging road with the train... You know women thinking that the train supposed to stop for her

.

When i read that question, i was like does he think a train is a common bike or something......

Chinjo2:


Bro did I hear you say why did the train not apply brakes? Do you think train is Okada?

Next year, I would be 35years old and all my life I have never been admitted to the hospital.
I do not take tablets or any sort of medications,
Fever and Malaria is alien to my system, basically I never fall sick.
I could stay where people complain of excessive mosquitoes but malaria never gets to me.

There are days when it might seem the body wants to fall sick, I just retreat and let the body heal itself (I don't take tablets or any medications) within 2-3 days, the body would be up and running (this rarely happens). The last time this happened was in 2011.

I wonder if there are others out there who don't fall sick at all, I keep thanking God for this Gift of good health because when I see cases of adverse health pateints it pricks my heart.

My BP is always within normal range, no matter how stressed or disturbed I am, I am AA and O+.

I thank God all the time for this !!!

With the present state of the country where the price of feeding keeps climbing up amongst other expenses, one is left to ponder on how people feed In this Nigeria especially Married men who are low income earners or outrightly out of job. It may even amaze you to know know that there are even married couples were the husband and wife do not have jobs yet they have mouths (children) to feed.

In this present reality, what would one judge as factors in providing Feeding allowance in the home?
What's is the Reasonable Sum to be provided for feeding in an average Nigerian home?
Married men, how do you make this provision?
Married women, how do you manage what is provided?

This knowledge might help folks who are still struggling In this aspect. A popular saying goes thus "Knowledge is Power" and i would add "especially when such knowledge is applied".

Read this:

https://www.lindaikejisblog.com/2022/10/i-died-in-fire-and-now-im-reincarnated-as-a-boy-5-year-old-boy-reveals-his-past-life-as-a-black-woman-who-died-30-years-ago.html

SultanOfPuna:

The coincidence is too much
He has the exact mannerisms of my late grandad. Plus the things that come out of his mouth sometimes is mind blowing.

How can a 5year old be saying things like
Mummy I want to go back to my house (village)
Mummy why don't you serve me food like you do when you were small.
Omo it's not normal oooo

Reincarnation do happen, there is an assignment he has come to fulfill.
You guys should be close to God, train him in God's way for when the time is right, he would fulfil his purpose.
I used to doubt a lot of these things but with age and time, my eyes has seen things and and ears have heard things.

There is nothing to be scared about.

SultanOfPuna:

The coincidence is too much
He has the exact mannerisms of my late grandad. Plus the things that come out of his mouth sometimes is mind blowing.

How can a 5year old be saying things like
Mummy I want to go back to my house (village)
Mummy why don't you serve me food like you do when you were small.
Omo it's not normal oooo