₦airaland Forum

dfrost:
you and queenitee no, kai!!!

but we really do have issues in Nigeria now.

You simply need to free yourself from the emotional blackmail. Yes she has helped you and supported you and you really appreciate her for it. But that doesn’t mean you should spend the rest of your life serving her.

You’ve supported her dream also and invest in her business, it’s not your fault she refuse to make her dream come true.

All in all, there are certain decisions we need to make that are difficult or might make us look bad or like an ingrate but they are always necessary. You telling her you’ve done all you can might even be the best thing for her. Once she realize she can’t depend on you financially anymore, she would take her business serious and take it to the next level and she might look back in few years to come and be grateful you made that decision and you would be grateful for that also.


Besides, if you keep succumbing to her blackmail, she would finally be the dictator in your new relationship and probably marriage. We humans are like that, manipulative by nature. Once she knows you will keep succumbing to her blackmails, she would keep blackmailing you, but once you let her know she can’t get to blackmail you anymore, even if she needs your help, she won’t use blackmail as a tool for achieving it. Sometimes, the oppressor only needs the oppressed to speak up.


Bro, some of the best decisions we make in life are always the hardest

we have issues in Nigeria May God protect you and your child and whoever the father is.

nairafamedotcom:
Funny

Very

Mindfulness:
Your sister is a hero. She has my blessings too. You people should try and live in the 21st century. Kuddos to your dad as well.

I love you for this comment

LesbianBoy:
Go and sleep madam! Mary Remmy that was a struggling actress for long! Immediately she married her husband, gbam.....changes everywhere! It was too obvious. Most of her mates that started acting with her have left the industry as dem no blow all these years.

You should go and sleep. I never said her husband didn’t help her with money. I said she was equally determined. Are there not people you would help with capital and yet they won’t make it because they are not goal oriented. You can help people with money but you can’t force them to be determined or goal oriented.
Please make sure to read and understand before you reply. I didn’t see anywhere up there where I disputed the fact that her husband helped out with money. My point was and still remains the fact she’s goal oriented, because if she wasn’t, even her husband’s money won’t give her all that. Like I said, running a business isn’t all about money.
So, you are the one who really need the sleep

danny56:
@Op, for better write up next time, say from your personal opinion. It's not generic!!!

Bless you. I don’t agree with the op one bit. All he wrote up there has nothing to do with age.

LesbianBoy:
See how she is running her mouth. All the things she listed won't have been possible if not for her rich husband.

Whatever, you also pray for a supportive husband or wife. Even if her husband is a billionaire and she’s not goal oriented, she would have nothing. Her husband might give her the capital, but she built her career. Building a career isn’t all about the money. Besides, the post isn’t about who fund who . Appreciate good things when you see it, see positivity in people, stop seeing negativity.
Who told you she wouldn’t have achieved that without her husband’s money? Yes her husband might have made the journey easier but with her kind of determination and business oriented mind, she definitely would have achieved just that even without her husband’s money.
A bitter lifestyle doesn’t suit anyone, your post is annoying.
I’m proud of the woman.

sexymoma:
If you and your friend never keep malice or fight... believe me it's either you are deceiving her or she is deceiving you

It’s very normal to fight, in fact, it’s okay. But keep malice? That’s bad, very bad. All these “my best friend stole my husband,” “my best friend betrayed me” starts from keeping malice. You don’t know malice? Malice means you can be talking to the person, yet be annoyed with them or wish them evil. It’s better to fight and part ways than to keep malice. It’s okay to fight but not to keep malice

Enemyofpeace:
Just leave her alone, I no trust you

Okay sir

safarigirl:
thanks dear.

It is from many years of observing human interactions and studying the human mind.

You are wonderful

Enemyofpeace:
you wan use style get closer to her and toast her abi?forget it ko le werk, she is my babe

I’m a lady

damilare214:
You talk about your family without compassion. Assuming the person in quote is your sister will you talk about her like that.

Thank you for all your advice, you don't have to show your personal resentment.

My husband to be is AA and not AS, and I'm not rushing into marriage because you all don't know my age.
SS patient are people like you too, they came by the mistake made by their parents.

Also, some SS are even healthier than most AA without sickness or drugs or attention.
I will pick your advice wisely.

Thanks

Exactly. The mistakes of their parents are what we all are tying to avoid. Besides op, no one is judging you for being SS, in fact, I adore SS because it’s not easy and y’all are the real MVP. We all are talking for the sake of trust in your relationship so you won’t lose it and so your husband would know how he can help you. No one, not even any single one of us is judging you. It’s better you tell him than someone else telling him or him finding out in any other way.

safarigirl:
from his narrative, she gives anyone who whistles at her a chance, so, this was never an option for her

@OP, if you are not at peace with marrying her, abeg leave her to find someone that is not within a circle she has been passdd around. Forget all this childish talk about who has changed, you can never tell if someone has truly changed or not, until they are faced with the same situation that constantly led them to falter.

Marriage is not a joke, it is not a chamber of torture that you should subject yourself to. The day you travel and she tells you one of your friends came to check on her, how will you feel? Where will your mind go?

Trust is more important than love in any union. Don't deceive yourself. You don't know if you will still find someone better after, but by that time, you will be stuck in a marriage with a woman that you can't trust

I’ve always love and admire you. How do you manage to talk so much sense?

Breaststroke:
Maria between you and I, you're the only one seeing something wrong with what Abelswife wrote.

I saw absolutely nothing wrong with her narrative, it was matter of fact and simple. No ill will there.

@ Bukatyne, did you just encourage the OP to carry on with her deceit? I can't go to page 1 to quote the particular comment that has me wondering.

@ OP, I don't know you personally but I feel resentment towards you for wanting to start a life long relationship with deceit. What happened to basic honesty in your relationship?

You see what happens when people want to marry at all costs? Singleness is not a disease you need to be cured from ooo!

We need to start teaching our ladies that marriage isn’t an achievement. I’m not trying to be a feminist or something. In fact, I want to get married also, but what I’m saying is marriage is not a do or die affair, you don’t have to lie just because you want to get married at all cost. Being single isn’t a disease. What’s the essence of getting married with lies and divorcing later?

Sanchez01:
I did. But don't blame her. The brother's wife manipulated her brother and even a result in order to force the marriage through. You'd act more than she did if you were in her shoes (God forbid).

Eventually, innocent kids end up paying for the lies and misdeeds of their parents. It is not a pleasant experience, if you witness one up close.

I’m telling you. I’ve witnessed one brought to the hospital. When the husband got tired, he left both mother and kid at the hospital and didn’t come back and that’s was a man that knew both himself and his wife are AS o, not to talk of a man that didn’t know. The kid was just seven years and the pain she was going through, I’ve never gone through it in my entire life.