Simply move out and from time to time send money to your parents. For your sisters forget sending them anything. You don't owe them anything. Besides they should be the one taking care of you as their younger brother. My siblings both older and younger used to harass me too until I decided that the only people I owe is my parents. These days send my parents money regularly but for my ungrateful siblings, we simply chat once in a blue moon.
HelpfulBro: I'm a young man and still living with my parents and sisters. I earn some good amount of money and I'm doing okay for myself, I try as much as I can to help my family out with food stuff for example I've helped with 100k for food stuff from now till December and did a little things too like support my mom and help my dad but I'm very unhappy with my sisters and mom.
My sisters always verbally abuse me by insulting me when I don't do something for them and try to make feel guilty for not giving them what they ask for, when I try to set boundaries like what I don't like they tell me to shut up that I'm the junior that I'm talking rubbish
Just this Morning while I was still getting up with sleep in my eyes and praying they started banging my door that light meter has finished and I should come and pay but I was confused so I just didn't respond till I finished praying and came out. Before I did she was already shouting that they should leave me since I don't want to answer and she'll put #200 naira own if that what I want.
She injured her leg from the door while she was going out side to do it and now she's blaming me that I'm the reason why it happened to her, saying I'm still her junior and I don't have sense that why would I not answer her. I'm shocked and I told her how I'm I the problem and I just literally woke up, I just told them that I hate them and now she's insulting me more
I don't respond but I'm getting very angry at this and I'm looking for a way to leave the house and relocate, they are my older sisters and they don't even work or do anything but I don't say it to their faces but I don't see why they don't give me mutual respect at all
Social media is indeed a medium for oppression. Who set such standards? Be grateful with what you have and others to breathe.
Nice2023: I just clocked 40 year old and I feel as if I have not done well for myself. May be because I had always set a standard, hence my high taste and expectations.
Now goes the question,as a Nigerian,what achievement do one expects from a 40years old man irrespective of his education?
This is a poverty driven question and poor understanding of a marriage is all about. With money most of these things are taken care of apart from bathing her which any loving caring and understanding husband would be more than happy to do. You as a husband can be a situation where she would be the one doing all these things for you.
In summary make money, love your partner and enjoy a sweet home.
Lutherblaq: My neighbour's wife is heavily pregnent, and i was shocked to see him doing things Like this:
>Washing her 'Clothes' >Doing all manners of 'Chores' >And even bathing her Sometimes We all Know how, things like that are really Rare to see, And to tell you that they have been married for like 12yrs, with atleast 3 kids. so the marriege is not that new na.
okoroemeka: sometimes I wonder how some men can relax so much and reach such years with nothing,is it laziness,lack of seeing opportunities,lack of proactive thinking,procrastination ,or simply accepting mediocre living standards?before I was 25 yrs I already have a car,wife,two children and a small two bedroom bungalow,it is sad that not everyone can pull him or herself out of poverty and that reinforced my belief that success is tied to state of mind,there is a proverb in igboland that says,e ejigi mkpacha nsi egbe agba adaka ozo,which means you cannot use scrap leftover gunpowder to shot a gorilla.
.
Stop sounding stupid. More than 80 percent of Nigerian youths are in this category. With your so called success, remember that background differs. Not everyone had a support system growing up. So don't rushing into conclusions just because you think you are doing well. There's a lots to becoming successful in life. Like have others have said, provide solutions not blames. Blaming does no good other than revealing how myopic your reasoning is.
That's funny. Are you asking for someone or are you one? Once you get used to your working environment, your introverted nature doesn't get in the way. Btw, no coworker will willfully say something to a colleague to cause a pain.
So don't be afraid if you are indirectly trying to find out sth. There always going to people who would like personality.
Essenza01: I really don't know anymore, i just did my budget for the month and i am scared, i have cut from everywhere possible and i fear for my self.. i dont have a GF, Wife, Children.. my salary is N400,000 and i have added side businesses and one or two's to even survive.. but with this fuel increase, what else is left... zero savings..
- Rent - N108,333/mth (1,300,000/12) - Fuel for car - N180,000 (36k for 5-6days) - Auto maintenance - N30,000/mth (service/repair) - Fuel for generator - N50,000/mth (20ltr/wk) - Feeding - N62,000 - (N2,000/day) - Health miscellenous - N5,000/mth - Dstv - N4,500/mth - Data - N7,000/mth - Recharge card - N3,000/mth - Dry cleaner - N4,000/mth (Starch/iron) - Hygiene maintenance - N10,000 (body spray/perfume, roll on, soap, cream) etc.. - Gift to people - N10,000/mth - Family House contribution - N20,000/mth - Eko electric - N10,000/mth - repairs and maintenance - N12,000/mth - Clothing, footwear etc - N10,000/mth - Outings, restaurant, sit outs and provisions - N30,000/mth
Total = N556,500...
My rent is average rent for where i stay, its a two bed flat, i use the other room for home office..
Feeding is N2,000/day.. its not anything out of the ordinary.. tried cooking and spent more with time wasting.
Fuel for car is at the new rate of N500/ltr, my car is a 70ltr car tank..
Auto maintenance is basic brake pads, shocks, service 2mths, tire guage, police pr, tire purchase if any, minor touch ups etc... nothing major.
Fuel for generator is 20ltr/day (2hrs or less daily)
I need help.... how are you people doing it, what am i doing wrong? The rat race is killing me..
. It is quite unfortunate the amount of abnormalities in Nigeria and almost every African countries who have refused to learn and grow. Imagine spending more on generator fuel than on your health. No basic amenities. What a country. Sometimes I dreaded coming back to visit just because of the state of affairs in my dear country.
Dude, the only solution to your problem and most people in Nigeria is to cut down on unnecessary expenditures e.g dstv, some outings, monthly renewal of clothes, wears etc. Focus on needs not wants.
And most importantly, like others have pointed out, live within your means. You don't need to live a fake life (becoming a debtor just to show up) for folks who know your worth to admire you. Living to impress have always ended in regrets.
And for those of you who go about celebrating, and hailing politicians because they build ordinary roads, flyovers etc, with your task money, I pity you all. Common social amenities will always be a problem. Electricity, clean water, good roads, good health system, all are sole responsibilities of the govt but in Nigeria, is quite the opposite. We are our own govt, so sad.
Some people might think, why are you bothered, when don japa. Surely I no dey naija, but I spent way too much than those of back home because I have families over there. So bad naija govt still reach me here. So you should understand why a working naija is good for all of us irrespective of where one dey. I won't be surprised to receive more calls now as the fire don received more oxygen.
That's what he forgot to into consideration. Tax alone will slash down the gross calculated before even start talking of recurring bills that often deducted automatically one has to pay.
High paying job alone isn't the reason for leaving to so called better countries.
Nigerians, the most confused religious people on earth. Shouting God up and down but deeply, they are worst human beings polluting every corners of the world.
Corruption is everywhere and you stupid religious people think Pornography is our problem. Btw, what is the difference between you, the oloshos sleeping around with every possible holes full of stds and a porn addicted person, who is safe from stds and various other sexually transmitted diseases?
Anyways, God has left Nigeria long time. Why won't he, a country that doesn't want to change, where every living soul has criminal mindset.
Interesting15: There are many avid patronizers of pornography all around the world. Many young people jumped into this immoral venture via curiosity and the inability to have full control over themselves. There are also many adults who have become a slave to both the bitter pleasures attached to pornography, as well as its numerous unpleasant side effects.
It's so bad. There are so many people in our society currently under the intense yoke of pornography. Perhaps, you are also one of them. But today, if you are ready to cooperate with the Spirit of God, there will be a revival indeed.
7 Things Many People Don't Know About Pornography
1. There is really nothing good in pornography. It is a perversion that defiles nature, as well as the divine order. The Will of God the Supreme Creator, is that sex should be a honourable and sacred activity, and sexual acts should be a private affair between a married man and his female wife in the safe circle of their marriage institution. Everything about porn is a perversion.
2. Whenever you see a porn apologist (those saying there's nothing wrong with porn), please, don't only be wary of them, but also flee from them. Let me expose them here. The average porn apologist is aware that everything is wrong with pornography, but they can't help but promote this immoral thing just for personal reasons. Some of them are directly working for the devil (terrible witches and wizards practicing diabolical occultism), and must do the bidden of their master the devil (which includes, luring and seducing others into sinful activities, so he can have a chance to afflict them). Don't be deceived by their outward appearances.
3. There are certain other porn apologists that are doing what they do because they don't want to be the only ones that will go on suffering from the unpleasant repercussions that follow pornography. Privately and secretly, they personally regret starting the journey of pornographic pleasures, but as they are stuck, they want others to be like them, hence, they portray porn in a positive light. I'm telling you the truth! Don't be deceived by their outward appearances.
4. The terrible effects of pornography are very many. I'm sure you already know some of them. But even more, than you know, there are deeper bitter repercussions attached to pornography.
5. It is possible to totally overcome pornography addiction. The Will of God is that you should have dominion over everything, and you shouldn't be under the yoke of immorality (and satan with hell)
6. You can reclaim your dominion and authority by accepting Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. This is the first important step you must take. Anywhere you are, open your heart and just say, "Jesus, please come into my life". If you are sincere, God will definitely come to you (because He loves you)
The Holy Spirit will be sent to help you. You now have the power and authority to rebuke lust (even out of your heart and thoughts) and temptations too. One of the things that will happen to you when you give your life to Christ is that you will experience a shift of mindset, and your thought patterns will be divinely enhanced and rightly empowered. You will no longer find solace in porn (or things that will get you dirty and hurt you). You will know the proper way to live life and will form new habits that glorify God, and that will ensure you enjoy the dominion you have been destined to have (don't forget that being under sin makes people forfeit their right to rule their world)
7. On your part, it is helpful to be accountable to a mature believer around you. Set the right boundaries and be busy with productive activities (including fulfilling your purpose, utilizing your talents, engaging in constant spiritual activities like praying and studying God's Word, etc). Also, take appropriate sacrifices (such as putting away your smartphone for some time). You are on your way to victory.
Bad government is only thing because the ruled allows it.
[quote author=onthehill post=121258042]Nigerian relationship coach and counsellor, Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo has said that Nigeria's problem is bad citizens and not bad government, IGBERETV reports.
He said this following his observation of Nigeria's presidential election held on February 25, 2023.
This supposed to be the fate of all underperformed politicians. We shouldn't allow failure to repeat itself by reelection of bad leaders. I am glad my Nsk people showed Him pepe. The governor wasted our 8 years in power.
Young man, have respect for elders, abeg. Tinubu no your mate. You or any other person running for the same political position doesn't change, he your elder.
That said, my follow Nigerians, let vote Obi for the President. APC and PDP have tried and failed woefully. Let's try a different party which have both a vibrant, a brilliant and healthy candidate to save these years of suffering APC and PDP have plunged us in for years.
OBI FOR THE PRESIDENT 🙏
[quote author=CallmeTrinity post=121147815]And they came for him 🤣
. It is quite unfortunate that you felt this way but there is more to it. Your friends may not be necessarily telling you lies or interested in discouraging you. Abroad is hard and I am speaking from experience. Which country I reside isn't important because it is the same everywhere. For more information, you could reach out to me via email . The point I want to pass across is that you should not rush into conclusions. I was once in your shoes until I traveled.
krissconnect: These past weeks, I've been reaching out to my friends who are abroad to help me with links or advices to move abroad too. But I discovered that none of them decided to help, instead they discouraged me either by saying, "it's difficult to move now or the country isn't issuing visa now".
One of my guy in CANADA defiantly ignored my text when I asked him for links or the route he used to move, the other in Korea said the country isn't issuing visa now but he recently moved back and another directly said that it's very hard to get visas now to travel. But one Asian American in the States gave me lots of links to move to the State and even encouraged me to move.
But then I don't understand why our African brothers over there will never encourage or advice someone willing to move. Is it envy or greediness or what? I've never had any of my guy abroad encourage me to move when I asked for advice. If things are difficult over there, why not come home?
NB: I never asked them for fund cos the money is available.
Like she knows what differentiates android phones from others. Ignorant is a disease, sister!
Icandream: A lady has opined that a man who truly loves his girlfriend will never watch her use an android phone.
The lady identified as Speedy on Twitter, stated that a man who truly loves his woman will never watch her use an android phone.
Her words,
“I swear! A man who truly loves you, will never watch you use an android phone”.
This generated mixed reactions online. A user identified as Marv wrote:
Buying you iPhone means d guy loves u.. na ur Toto go suffer, no go work. I fucking hate it when woman can’t pay her bills and depending on a guy how una dey feel like like self. A woman who pays her bills gets more love and attention from her man… I come in peace
How can you prove that there's no God's presence in their marriage?
Everything isn't about God. Most times common sense is all that we need.
Allowing his wife to go and have a rethink is better than fighting with her over sex.
Btw, you never said anything on the needful things you would want him to do. Your comment wouldn't help OP in any way since you aren't clear on what exactly he should do.
Hashabiah: Brother, you are just taking a risk with this decision. Now I am not here to give you advice (since it is obvious that you have taken matters into your hands ) but you should know that having a successful marriage requires one thing: the presence God. Human wisdom will only lead to confusion and the way I see it, your marriage might just be heading in that direction if you do not put things right.
Quite understandable. Fakes friends everywhere. For grandmaster like us, we identify them earlier on. No point calling them friends. I only play along if you have what I need.
Ammishaddai: All simps on Nairaland , I hope you have your pen and paper with you to take notes . As you can see , this was a man who married for the sake of love and affection , now look where it landed him . Imagine, he is now a prisoner of his past stupidity , and it would take a miracle for him to escape this without going back to square one. So the moral of the story is this : don't get married without a prenuptial agreement, but it's best to remain as you are . After all, nobody ever died from being single
. Exactly, no one died of being single oh. Marriage has lost its meaning in this current generation.
He has all the Wealth and Riches that Money can buy but if he does not have a Genuie relationship with JESUS Christ, it is a Complete WASTE! It is not Worth it!
You may not understand this until you close your eyes in Death without JESUS Christ. Then you will Understand Clearly that All we do and have on Earth are Vanities and Nonessentials ..
Easier said than done. Be in his shoes, and you will understand him better. It is good to give but it shouldn't be norm for his friends to be going back for more even when he is facing financial difficulties too.
Mercychen: You should thank God you are in the position of giving and not the other way around. Or would you want to switch places with them? Ask those begging, they wish to be in your position. So stop. Complaining.
What you should rather be doing is praying to God to sustain you in that position and increase you to a point where you'll have more than enough to give to the needy.
I still don't understand the purpose of this show. From married women sleeping around to showing of pussy. Anyways, Naija dey always copy things wrongly sha.
Uzoamaka Ohiri in a recent interview with GoldMyneTV said that she got pregnant for her ex-lover before she met Nedu Wazobia.
“This is something he knows about, we both know, I was seeing somebody before I met Nedu before the relationship ended Nedu has already seen my pictures on our mutual friends WhatsApp, so I came to Lagos and I met Nedu and he seemed different so I gave him a chance, we had a great time and then I found out I was pregnant, my child isn’t the reason we separated.
“If you’ve seen the DNA report, the date they conducted that. People are saying he wanted to take them to Canada so he conducted a test but he knew. He was even doubting the paternity of our last child..."
I also want to learn AWS and at the moment I am learning basic Linux OS. Please I need to ask you some specific questions regarding this. I tried sending you message but narialand wouldn't allow me. Says I should wait. Please what is the best way to contact you? I would be glad to follow you on other social media if that would facilitate meeting up with you quickly. Thanks
NB personally am into infosec as a penetration tester (CEH v11) and now studying for my OSCP (Certification course from Offensive Security the creators of Kali Linux)next year. Infosec (cyber security) is a good field and there's a lot of entry courses and certifications including free ones that are really good. I'm 2 months into my study for AWS cloud practitioner, i just wanted to add cloud computing knowledge to my skills. (Maybe cloud security in future) If there's enough interest i will try to drop links/info on some free but good courses for cloud computing (AWS), Infosec (Cyber security) and Linux OS.
Nigeria government which way? Someone's personal business and they touring and supervising the whole project like it is a government's own. Making unnecessary publicity for that matter. The irony here is that they barely supervise any government projects the they do eye service with respect to this refinery. Dangote should just buy the whole country since it seems that would bring the needed changes we are clamoring for since the departure of the colonial masters.
Masturbation was hindering your progress and causing your money to vanish. Tell me, is your money not vanishing again.
Your problem was not masturbation but twist of life. When things doesn't work out, we naturally tend to question and blame everything. Sometimes it may just be indicipline, careless decisions, environment and state of mind etc. If you were in America where life is much easier and organized, would you have accused masturbation. Africa and Religion!
Anyways, when you feel the urge, first is to work out of your house. Take a stroll. Occupy your minds with meaningful things, get obsessed with your vision and most importantly, if you have the courage, make female friends in your church.
Patriarchy001: Tunde Bakare recently took to his pulpit to give examples of graduates who finished from university but found something doing with their hands - he particularly laid emphasis on the woman who sewed his agbada, bragging on how she graduated from university few years ago but decided to start sewing clothes instead of looking for a job.
He also gave examples of other graduates who sew agbadas for a living of whom he patronizes their business.
In his words: "The Future does not belong to Job seekers" "Government cannot keep on employing people, that's not their job"
Do you agree?
This is why I hate anything that's associated with pastors. 99.99% of them are fake and ignorant. Why would a graduate be sewing agbada after years of studies?
Family › Re: I Feel Like I'm Being Bullied In My Family by Realiskit(m): 8:00am On Nov 10, 2023
