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Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 7:16pm On Feb 29, 2012

TV01:
Marriage as a proposition has changed significantly in recent times. One of the downsides for the “wealthier party” – typically men – can be serious financial loss, possibly leading to severe hardship for all but the quite well off.

With the introduction of “no-fault” divorce and laws designed to “ensure the best interest of any children” – which invariably benefits the “primary carer”, a role for the most part presumptuously awarded to the mother – men are also in danger of losing out on a significant role in raising their children.

Many on this thread are looking at “Nups” as the solution, be that pre or post. And doubtless, with a little creativity, I’m sure we could well see nups evolve into a fully-fledged (and tradable?) financial instrument. The primary driver behind this approach being to limit the financial downside of divorce.

I beg to differ. And for a whole host of reasons;

1. Even if nups were perfectly legal and enforceable, they’d still have to be agreed by the parties. What woman in this day and age would not insist on minimum and potentially scaled (if Daddy hits pay dirt at any point) financial payments for “her kids”. Is anyone left in doubt as to the position the “law” will take on this?
2. It doesn’t speak to a potentially more costly issue – emotionally and financially – of access to the children
3. It doesn’t address or challenge the true motivation behind some of the weird political and legal maneuvering. In fact, it plays right into it’s hands per 1. above
4. An even greater reason – and without touching on 4. above - it doesn’t address root issues, such as the nature, benefits and understanding of marriage. Rebalancing and reclaiming it for the key, most basic and ultimately most important societal building block it is. The family.
5. Marriage is not a business transaction

Let me start form point 5. First. Many of the discussions here typically focus on rich (celeb) type situations, which to be honest are far from the typical “garden variety” divorce.

As has been rightly pointed out, how many – if any – of the discussants here are any better than comfortably well off? And even if you are, a messy and acrimonious divorce can make road-kill of even the most comfortable lifestyle. Not to mention the physical and emotional costs. Anyone reading will have heard of the “broken men” and the “estranged and wayward children”. Very real possibilities for your ordinary Joe in the event of divorce.

To treat marriage or any part of it “transactionally” is to divorce - excuse the pun - it from its true worth and meaning and strip it of much of it’s value.

In fact, it would be more honest to treat it as a “transaction” end-to-end, which to be honest is what a lot of people do anyway. Merely adding some spiritual and social content at the front-end, then using the courts to reap the profit at close.

Honest end-game here would be a situation (and if I recall there has been one, involving a rich celeb no less) where having kids and providing for their upkeep were based on a pre-agreed legal contract. Is that really what we want?

More later if time permits, but I welcome comment on the little I’ve posted.

Best
TV

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 12:50pm On Feb 29, 2012

Sagamite:
I am sorry, this is a DAFT prenup:

"The prenup calls for Jay Z to pay Beyonce $10 million if the marriage ends after 2 years, and $1 million a year for each further year she remains in the marriage, up to 15 years ,
He promised to pay her an additional $5 million for each child she bears for him - for her loss of income during the pregnancy and child rearing years ,

And Beyonce would be granted access to their private jet and fleet of cars, which includes a $1 million 1959 Rolls-Royce convertible."

$10m for what? $25m max for what? Why does she not pay him that for him marrying her? She has more than enough money to live large on, I would not pay her a DIME! We leave with what we came with and earned. Giving money in prenup is only for a situation where I feel the ex-wife might be impoverished after divorce or be an extended housewife hence not making money, not when she is working and making her own significant sums. This prenup just shows he is saying he is taking a fault for any marriage failure before the marriage even begins.

$5m for the child is shaky to me. I understand the loss of income but I am not too sure about child rearing. If he is contributing lets say $2m a year per child to child rearing, what is her contribution to the child rearing? Abi no be dem pikins? Surely they are not his alone, that would be confirmed when the courts award her custody. The only thing there is that maybe she makes more than $5m a year.

well, you have a point but it appears in this case it is Jay that just wants to do it, perhaps to show his love for Bey but in a way that does not leave him like a ravaged kitten.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 10:22am On Feb 29, 2012

pro01:
Wow, choice words mehn. Been a while I listened to Big Pimpin'. . .that was back when Jigga was Jigga. . .before he sold out and gave his heart to Beyonce (or did he?). Anyways, I'ma download that track right away.

Pro, Jigga is still Jigga, homeboy still has his street smarts intact. He made Bey sign a prenup whose benefits are all conditional and little far-fetched for a self-obsessed star like Bey. For a millionaire of Jigga's standing, the prenup does not give Bey up to $30million in the worst case scenerio of their divorce. The guy smart die jare. And you wonder why rappers in particular call these females Biatches?? And rarely stay trapped in any marriage no matter how pretty you are. They will rather make a babymomma outta your a$s. . .lol
Go and tell sombori like fiddy to split his buck in half for you na. . .lol

Nairaland General › Re: Lagosians Feel They Can Outsmart Everyone by rhymz(m): 10:09am On Feb 29, 2012

Babzilla:
, and i can tell that Lagos bois no sabi d difference btw bred and bread. Bushman

hahahahahaha. . .funny enough I was going to post a comment on it only for you to beat me to it. Lagos boy indeed!! Pikin wey never taste another kind of soup na im dey make noise say im mama soup sweet pass. All na lagosians o, even the ones wey dey use being for the place wey dem suppose use been not to talk of the "I was born and Bread" lagos boy. . .lol
in lagos you will get the good, the bad and the Ugly. Seriously, if you wan see sharp men enter Aba or Warri, dis wan no be mouth. Warri boy go take mouth sell you to person, use the money buy you beer on top. Aba boy go use wetin u take dey claim fall your hand yakata. . Lol. . Only Aba boys go create stuff, like shoes and shirts, put the trendiest label tags on them, export them go Dubai and co, still import am enter lag and claim say na italian shoes and british shirts and the so-called lagos smart a$$es go buy am the price of the shirts from Uk and co, yet, lagosians are smart. %80 of those fines shoes and packet designer shirts are made in Aba but you no go know, na the smart lagosians dey buy am pass o, thinking say na janded property, lol. My fellow lagosians make we calm down biko, there's a huge difference between street smarts and just mere exhibition of criminal tendencies jor, lol

Nairaland General › Re: Lagosians Feel They Can Outsmart Everyone by rhymz(m): 12:30am On Feb 29, 2012

londoner:
Lagosians are street smart, yes. It is sometimes a negative thing IMO.

Even when outside of Nigeria you can tell a person who has lived in Lagos for a long time, they are usually much rougher/louder etc.

They are also more driven, they have to be. Only the fit survive in Lagos, and this can be a good thing, IF ONLY USED IN A POSITIVE WAY, RATHER THAN TO SCHEME OR BE CUNNING.

Many people love Lagos and can never live anywhere else, for me you could not pay me to live there, because you wouold be asking me to just survive rather than to live.

This is what makes Lagos so rowdy and stressful, I have noticed that the stress comes out on the faces of Lagosians. They tend to look much rougher/warn than people from other cities. That's just my observation.

lagosians rough?
They are loud no doubt, they are smart too no doubt but an average lagosian is no where as rough as an average Aba, Warri or even Onitsha boy. These guyz are the bulk of Igbos you find in the markets in lagos. If you say you get 2head, rough die go try one of them na?
An average lagosian get mouth pass mind, im dey use head pass strength and has more access to modern stuff than their counterparts in other states. An average lagosian can form ajebutter and kpaki levels for you at thesame time and you no go detect which one he realy is. But Nwa Aba or Waffi boy has no hiding place, im packaging alone go tell you say im mean bizness. I remember yr one when I carry one burberry wrist watch my Uncle from Yankee dash me, as a lag boy wey i be na, I dey tell guys say i buy am 20k for one of those malls inside the palms for lekki, all those my PH friends wey sabi spend fire begin trip o, dey gov me levels.na im one Aba boy tell me point and plain, nna hafu ihia ina kowa ( guy man leave that matta wey u dey gist) this wristwatch dey Ariaria market, if you doubt, I go bring am come nxt wkend i enter Aba. I follow am argue am, tell am say d watch no dey im aba lvls o, the guy swear say im go bring am come. Play play dis homeboy come back from Aba with with my burberry wristwatch, exactly thesame thing as in I come tire. My Ph friends laugh em when the boy yarn the m d price of the watch; N1500, chei!! Me sef come begin reason say that my Uncle know say d watch no make just dash me the thing com dey form chairman. The mistake ppl make is to claim that you get everything in lag and cheap too. That na lie. Enter Ariaria market for Aba or enter Onitsha main market you will have an entirely different opinion. Abi na my warri friend wey nearly Bleep my cousin wey sabi form expensive chick all with sweet mouth and warri street guy swag?, lol, Bone lagosians need to test their street credibility outta lag b4 dem suppose yarn o.

Nairaland General › Re: Lagosians Feel They Can Outsmart Everyone by rhymz(m): 9:57pm On Feb 28, 2012

I am a lagosian to the bone. . .i ve seen it all. . . The hustle, bustle, fast movements disorderliness, sec sch cults back in the days in St finbarr's Akoka Barriga. . My hustle with the guys in ladipo, oshodi, mgbuka guys in lawanson, parts of papa ajao, factory work. Street fights that pulls crowd the size of a church congregation, street footballs that leaves you with indelible marks on ur legs. I ve had my own bad experiences at the old oshodi fairly used electronic market, computer village buy sth and use mopol collect am back kind of runs, fufu fones, uk used brand new blackberries and so on. I know lagos is bursting with very mean ppl with criminal minds and smarts but mehn but I know one thing for a fact too, u can't outsmart an Aba and Warri boy even if you are a lagosian. These two sets of ppl are an enigma, this guys have got what real street smarts is: criminally minded, extremely fearless, are extremely on the move and very rough. Unless you have not related with these two sets you can mistakenly underestimate them because unlike lagosians who are usually more refined in their approach, these pair careless about finesse, refinement or sophistication, they are right up in your face. Na when i enter sch for east na im i sabi say na where ma smarts stop na in this ppl own begin. This guys will outplay you if it comes to criminal activities, abi na to counterfit sth, no even try aba boyz for that one, na to scope person with sweet mouth even when dem no fit, warri boy will outwit you there, abi na for fearlessness, hahah.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 5:30pm On Feb 28, 2012

Sagamite:
Wow!

More stories that tell you that marriage in the West should only be done with a prenup if you are rich or have the ability to be rich. Otherwise you put your life in the hands on another, who then have the powers to fck it up all in the name of "faith" and "blind love".

God forbid!

Gbam!

Thank you, my brother.

My story is less serious than yours. I know a girl that was my female cousin's friends. I used to see her come and party with my cousin when they were still young. Some like 7 years later she came to my cousins birthday and my cousin was helping me recall who she was as she greeted me. Then my cousin was telling me later that she married another Nigerian in Ireland and left the UK. She had 2 kids for this guy before the marriage broke down after 5 years. This guy had been in Ireland for years and worked hard, before you can say Nwanyi, she was awarded 2 of his houses he invested his sweat in for being a housewife raising the kids and the court was generous enough to let him keep 1 remaining house. He had to be paying mortgage for 2 houses (the one he lived in and the one she lived in with the kids) and rent the last one out (sorry, when I say "he" rented out, she took the money, otherwise he would be paying 3 mortgages while she owned 2 of the houses). She is a sit-at-home mum, while he is bursting his longs working for her to be more wealthy than him.

That was how that man's life and plans were destroyed because he decided to marry under some crazy, lunatic laws in faith without protection.

I will do all I have to do to keep my money.

I don't need to convince any woman to sign a pre-nup. I will TELL her to sign it. Any resistance and I will end the relationship. It is not even a matter of discussion. Just walk away and delete her number.

seriously o. . If she aint signing a pre-nup then let her take a long walk to oblivion, most of these women are facking hustlers and you blame jigger for those immortal lines that aptly captures the mentality of majority of the women that hang around them:
Big Pimping
"Many chicks wanna put Jigga fist in cuffs Divorce him and split his bucks Just because you got good head, I'ma break bread so you can be livin it up? Shit I, parts with nothin, y'all be frontin Me give my heart to a woman? Not for nothin, never happen I'll be forever mackin"
little wonder he got Beyonce to sign a prenup with very moderate compensations and pre-conditions to protect himself. At least nobody is talking about splitting his Bucks. Tiger woods, Michael Jordan, Kobe and co are pu$$ies. Rappers know how to protect their money way better than ballers and movie stars.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 11:22am On Feb 28, 2012

Sagamite:
You dey crase!

So you think local girls will not ask for half, na only white/foreign woman that will do?

GBAM!

Where is that cretin called Moremi?

Saga thank you very much for putting that hypocrit in his place. What has place of origin got to do with it, I wonder O. My Uncle that I am presently staying in his house here in Owerri is a victim of this same greedy feminist mentality. In his own case his wife is from thesame Imo state, Mbano to be precise, funny enough, it was my aunt that saw this greedy and heartless woman and introduced her average a$$ to my Uncle who just came in on a vacation from the states. A Fair and fiercely attractive woman with very many concealable character flaws. Of course the poor man did not see pass the pretty face and the fact she was a nurse, perhaps he reasoned with a career like that he had hit a jackpot. All he needed to do was marry her and take her with him to the US and live his Utopian dreams. In his haste to marry the BITCH, he did not allow for the proper family background investigation that usually preceeded the payment of bride price and stuff like that, the homeboy just drag my pupsy and co invade the gurl village, show them some American Abracadabra and wonder, did everything and then plunged into plans to bring her to the states. Before we could say Nwanyi, Biatch was already heavy with twins while still in Naija. No-do, no-do she was already in the states. Like play like play the woman don shit twins, 5-10yrs into the marriage she already was a mother of four childrien, with an excellent nursing career thanks to my uncle's financial encouragement and further sponsorship of numerous courses in her nursing field and the accompanying degrees earned. Then came the different stories of the woman's infidelity with a co-worker. That even caused them to separate, my uncle was forced to bring down the issue to Naija, a meeting ensued thereafter between our families and the woman's. When facts became so damning and hot for her to take, she made a threat that left everyone dazed at the meeting; she told her husband's family that she has nothing to lose if my uncle is seeking for a divorce and that she was ready for whatever decisions my Uncle was going to take provided my Uncle is ready to path ways with half of his possession. Already, the separation and dirty stories had taken a toll on the kids, they were living with her and she succeeded in turning them against their father. My Uncle knowing that he stands to lose almost everything if it eventually gets to a divorce stage rather chose to remain separated from the woman as she obviously wanted that and even more, he avoided every antics she emplyed to get a divorce, homeboy just had to endure, the whole thing turned the man into a junky of some sort until his health and finances started declining. The childrien had become something else, one of them got preggy and told their dad through the phone while he was in Nigeria. The woman after galavanting and stuff came down with her own ailment, breast cancer. Na that time she come humble small, come remember say the kids should be with their father and not her boyfriends they were hitherto living with. Long and short the woman eventually died and the husband did not attend her burial. Already sef, my Uncle himself has not recovered from the whole effect of the nonsense she did. He is now retired and has little to show for his over 35yrs in the U.S. The man don dey Naija now for almost a yr and is not saying anything serious about going back to the states. The childrien obviously do not miss him either. This was a man that had a very bright beginings o. . And that dude is here yapping about local and foreign wife like it is any different. The legal system allows for exploitation and that is why even the dumbest females with a kitten licence can capitalize on it and make claims that her forebearers and her generations unborn can never achieve.

Family › Re: by rhymz(m): 12:10am On Feb 28, 2012

ronkebp:
I prefer my hubby's natural perfume, i love to sniff his singlets and boxers (wierd me) but the for the artificial perfume, Lacoste Green, love it.

okpari!!

ronkebp:
^^^^^ Idon't know oooooo, maybe i need help

exactly what you need!!

Family › Re: by rhymz(m): 11:56pm On Feb 27, 2012

As Nwa Aba wey I be: make some of una wey dey busy dey claim perfumes wey dey cost like 5k,10k, 20k say na im una dey use, make una no forget to tell us whether na the original ones abi na the ones wey umu nnam dey arrange for here o. . . lol.
By the way, i find aboki perfume on Ajiya sexy o. . Is that allowed? Poster you could try dat one too o. . Learn to patronize made in naija. .lol

1 Like

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 11:41pm On Feb 27, 2012

Theblessed:
[b][size=16pt]But who is this ignoble!!! What do you know about Family Laws of the 21st Century in the Uk?

You think, Western legal system is like that of Nigeria where laws are never changed or seen to be enforced appropriately.

Look, marriage can be annulled in any Family Courts in the West (remember, I did not say religious courts, here?), it doesn't have to and shouldn't be in the country of your birth or where you got married in the first place.

Look before you start interrupting people on here, make sure you do your home work properly, ok??

So, because someone got married in Jamaica and live in the Uk with his/her family - and if they want to go their separate ways therefore, they must head home to Jamaica to do it, abi?

Or should we say in this day in age, because, one studied a Science or Engineering Degree he/she must wait for jobs in those fields before he could work and feed his family, when he could find work elsewhere, eh!

I know some idiots are still thinking that way in Nigerian today and based on your thinking, you're not far from such group.

Yes, its true the Oil man and his wife live in the Uk and if she or he is on holiday in America or Canada or still in the UK and feels that, American or Canadian justice could do him/her good then, he/she is free to ask to settle the matter there - what matters, is it not that both get justice and that's what courts are there to do??

It doesn't matter where you file for divorce - what matters is getting justice and African courts or Nigerian courts would never give a woman justice, abi? Maybe, only South African courts in Africa as a whole could even think of it - giving a little justice to a women, shame!

Right, here's a little home work for you. You see, when Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall his longer term, long suffering girlfriend and mother of his 4 children went to somewhere in Indonasia and got married in a Hindu tradition/ceremony in the early 1990's - we all thought Mike had finally sowed his wild oaks not realising there was a baby coming into the world from South America by another young model - LG.

This event obviously, ruffled their marriage and Jerry head off to the British courts and asked for divorce only to be shocked when her husband contested the validity of the Indonasian Hindu marriage - as not legal and settled her only £10 million after many years together whilst the mother of his love-child got £6 millions when she sought paternity and won.

And, I'm asking you Mr clever Lawyer, with great juri-prudence at your disposal - in which Country/City did Jagger contest that divorce? Was it not in Britain, was it not in a British Family courts and was it not in the City of London for that matter? clever!!!

Listen, if you don't know your ABC on issues raised here in Nairaland please, ask first, people would direct and open you blind eyes, ok! There's nothing wrong in asking for ideas/direction from those who know, than pretending to live a lie - that's ignorance.

Next time, dare not interrupt my commentary here until you'd researched your work, ok!

Now, go and google the above names and find out things - try and learn more about people and behaviours before coming out here to challenge ideas you're so timid about, lazy man!
[/size][/b]

whoever this person is, you need to shut the hell up. Writing an incoherent lengthy gibberish does not earn you any tangible point, FOOL!!
In your haste to sound smarter than you realy are you forget that the issue of permanent residency of the parties involved will render such a move useless. The marital courts in the US do not have any jurisdiction to hear any divorce case of couples who do not leave permanently or work in the US. Neither does a mere vacation to the country automatically confers them with jurisdiction on such cases.
Commenting with such an unbriddled arrogance like you are smarter or more exposed than every other person or Nigerians who do not see any legal sense in your lame arguments only exposes the malady of your ignorance. Your example is enough evidence of your utter un-intelligence and self-imposed mental confusion. Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall were British citizens, that gives the british marital courts the jurisdiction to hear the case, in the case of Mr and Mrs Priest none of them is a citizen or permanent residents in the US and you keep trying to arrogantly shout down everyone that sees no sense in your legal abracadabra while you bask in your delusions of grandeur, shallow logic and useless legal pontifications that only make sense to you.
Abeg go sit your ignorant a$$ down and let intelligent commentators school you.
Let me borrow the C word from Saga; You are a Bono fide CRETIN with oversized Egos that do not fit.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 3:56pm On Feb 26, 2012

chaircover:
Many of the men talking are not married. I am married and I know that a lot goes into these partnerships from both sides and money is just part of it but lots of other things make up a marriage.

If many successful married men were to be true to themselves, many got there with support from the wife and I dont mean financialy. You have a spring in your step when you know that there is someone there for you; Your number one fan. Someone who tells you that the sky is the limit, someone who crys with you and laughs with you. Someone who beleives in you. Someone who interceeds for you. Someone who wants the best for you and so on.

Many of you look at it as a business partnership and marriage isnt like that.

As regards the house, unless he has full custody of the kids which I doubt, then the kids should be able to live in the affluence that they are used to. Its not the kids fault that mummy and daddy cant live with each other.

Like I said, If he is indeed a billionaire then 40 million will not kill him; he could have easily lost that amount on the stock exchange or in a bad business deal. He also has the consolation that some of that money is going to go towards making his kids comfortable.

seriously, I am done with this emotional laden crap of what she did to make the man successful. If you can't put in words what the hell this woman did to deserve half of this man's wealth then take a trip to GTFOH. . You are just as lame as her greedy attempt.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 3:42pm On Feb 26, 2012

rhymz:
stop posting this rubbish. Your way of reasoning is appalling. You keep making it look like the woman is a victim or something. Are settlements meant to spite the man or to ensure that the woman is adequately taken care of even after the collapse of the marriage and not for her to exploit the man. People divorce for different reasons, one person do not neccessarily need to have done wrong. It is not like the man has not given her anything, what the man gave her is moderate and by any means very satisfying. Don't forget the woman did not bring anything into the man's business, it is called compensation not vengance. Even if the man can afford it, it still does not make it right. Are you trying to say if this man was your elder brother, you would rationalize this woman's demand with such weak arguments. Most of the alleged contributions you claim she made could as well have been done by a nanny it does not justify such an obscene request. Stop fabricating excuses that do not exist.
Do unto others what you would want them do to you.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 3:11pm On Feb 26, 2012

queensmith:
tbh with you, i think because we're not in his shoes we don't really know how it is. It probably goes to show how much a woman is needed, how important marriage is in spite of all the odds, the benefits to a family. If his money was that important he wouldnt have risked them. He could have just got her pregnant and continued his life abi?

besides, him giving up 20million is not going to make him poor, its going to make him a responsible father and ex husband to a millionaire

stop posting this rubbish. Your way of reasoning is appalling. You keep making it look like the woman is a victim or something. Are settlements meant to spite the man or to ensure that the woman is adequately taken care of even after the collapse of the marriage and not for her to exploit the man. People divorce for different reasons, one person do not neccessarily need to have done wrong. It is not like the man has not given her anything, what the man gave her is moderate and by any means very satisfying. Don't forget the woman did not bring anything into the man's business, it is called compensation not vengance. Even if the man can afford it, it still does not make it right. Are you trying to say if this man was your elder brother, you would rationalize this woman's demand with such weak arguments. Most of the alleged contributions you claim she made could as well have been done by a nanny it does not justify such an obscene request. Stop fabricating excuses that do not exist. Do unto others what you would want them do to you.

Family › Re: Nigerian Billionaire Battles British Wife Over $21million Divorce Payout by rhymz(m): 10:19am On Feb 26, 2012

Seriously, a lot of women make very stewpid passionate statement that defiles common sense.
This feminism thing has become an avenue that criminal females exploit to get rich. How can anyone in their right senses support a woman that knew nothing about how this man made his wealth to bequeath to her such obscene amount of money all because she was married to him in the UK. Does it even make sense? Most of these guys talking about the man being stingy and wicked wait until it happens to you then you will know how easy it is to dole out a million dollars to a gold digger whose only job through out you were with her was to bear you childrien and spend your money. Yesterday I was in a similar argument with a friend in the UK, she kept on talking about how it was possible for Anne Macauley to get 2face to settle her bigtime( if 2face marries her in the US or UK) in the event of a divorce. I was like, how does a court compel a man whose source of livelyhood, wealth and properties are not in the west but in Nigeria. Is that even possible?
A lot of women these days are just so obsessed with the prospects of getting half of a man's worth in the event of a divorce, it renders marriage a useless union and affair to get into. Whatever happened to moderate settlement, why do feminists have this misconception that whenever there is a divorce it is usually the fault of the man and that the woman must have suffered in the marriage and deserves a settlement that looks like a revenge on the man. A lot of people make senseless arguments and demands they wont even oblige if they were in such conditions. Very stewpid laws that is gravely political and unneccessarily vengeful.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 8:18am On Feb 26, 2012

Who is this crossman dude. . .seems like an internet psycho obsessed with Pastor Chris, na wa O. . I thought this whole thread was about Whether Masturbation is right or Wrong, why is the the dude posting long unreadble conversations.
Dude stop trolling and spamming the thread jare!!

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 4:44pm On Feb 22, 2012

Pastor Chris never said it was ok to go on a joy ride, he only re-iterated what the the bible says and so far he was right. The bible never condemned m@sturbation and that is the annoying fact.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 6:28pm On Feb 21, 2012

[quote author=Natasha,, link=topic=874534.msg10243346#msg10243346 date=1329844678]urge? so who tells you, you have an urge? your butt? hello the brain is the centre of life, everything starts there how are you going to know you long for something without your brain? so everything still boils down to your thoughts how on earth can I be doing something as masturb@tion and not think of sex or related stuffs?

see ya'll laterz *I would have finished cooking by now*

goshen take care
rhymz ,Joe and Coogar happy married life [/quote]dont confuse lust which is stimulated by thoughts in the brain and urge that is a direct consequence of that could have been stimulated by anything other than lust

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 6:12pm On Feb 21, 2012

[quote author=Natasha,, link=topic=874534.msg10243053#msg10243053 date=1329842020] Galatians 5:19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest and they are fornication, uncleanness, loose conduct, idolatry . . . drunken bouts, revelries AND THINGS LIKE THESE As to these things I'm forewarning you, . . .'' so if drinking doesn't concern God why should He talk about it, why does he want us to keep it on check not to get drunk? [/quote]unclean in the bible was used in different context, unless you weant to indulge in unneccessary semantic embelishment of convenience, Joe was talking pretty much about it in the context of hygiene and not in the context of morality. If you want to go by biblical historical translation you will understand that theologians in their bid to translate the words from their original hebrew meaning have meant different things at differnt time for a particular word or concept. For instance King James says unclean and NIV say Impure it shows you how words lose meaning during translation. If you want to argue this I am game as well.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 5:55pm On Feb 21, 2012

debosky:
I Cor 10:31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

So yes - you can eat pounded yam and oha soup for the glory of God.

"whatever you do" that is all inclusive and could as well mean you could as well masturbate if it is done to the glory of GOD. YES, a christian man that refuses to fornicate and instead go for a "Joy Ride" could as well be included in that quote my brother. . . It does not prove anything jare!!

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 5:29pm On Feb 21, 2012

Natasha
since we are in the mood of talking about what glorifies God; does swallowing a hot bowl of Pounded Yam with Oha soup glorify God?
Is it a sin as well.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 5:15pm On Feb 21, 2012

exactly what I have been trying to knock into their head o. I wont even respond to those other goons who are throwing temper tantrums and resorting to throwing insults.
Natasha is seeing the whole issue from the tenets of her aquired sense of decency and not what is in the bible. Asking me if m@sturbation glorifies God any more than eating hot pounded yam glorifies God. Such weak arguments do not help stance at all. All these pseudo-moralist with their cultivated piety are commit lustful acts worse than self-service but will be quick -in order to mask their drowning conscious- to misquote the bible to look upright and smart. Pastor Chris is now a Devil because he dared to state the obvious truth that your pastors would conveniently not want to talk about. It is either they come up with quotations that condemn m@sturbation or they just agree with the pastor jare!

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 4:27pm On Feb 21, 2012

[quote author=Natasha,, link=topic=874534.msg10242123#msg10242123 date=1329835749]
When you are intimate with your husband or wife, there is no shame. When you fornicate or self-service, there is shame, regret, and loss of self-respect.

rhymz show me in the Bible where it was written that if you suffocate someone with a pillow you have commited sin? the point is you've killed so its definitely a sin, this is exactly what I want you to understand, that the bible did not specifically mention the word mastub@tion doesn't remove it from sin list,

Please rhymz explain how an act which goes contrary to Gods word is not a sin? you can look at the bible scriptures I quoted, does self-service go in line with them? please answer me, then tell your self a lie that self-service is no sin ,
An act that defiles your mind and thoughts
an act that makes you feel guilt and shame
an act that makes you yield to your fleshy desires
An act that gives no glory to God
An act that seems like a substitute for sex
Please how on earth do you say such an act is no sin?
[/quote]there is no ambiguity in your example dear, any man that takes another man's life has commited murder, same can be applied for any act that that is driven by lust in the mind, yes!! But what if ma$turbation was not a result of lustful desires or thoughts. What if the ma$turbation was as a result of some mechanical stimulation, or are you going to argue that is not possible too. Or you think every ma$turbation is a result of lustful thoughts? Answer me na?
Hormonal imbalance can can cause you to ma$turbate faster than any erotic thoughts if you don't know, even the way you lie on the bed or floor can trigger masturbation and sexual tension and release. What about clothes? Do you categorize all those too as erotic stimulants? Have you ever been in a situation where you feel so much $exual tension that you dont even need to have any thoughts to ejaculate?
For reasons only God knows he chose not to list it in any form along other sexual acts -which are not even as rampant as ma$turbation- as sin is a strong indication that there is a purpose for it. Argue with biblical perspective biko and not your moral idiosyncrasies.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 4:06pm On Feb 21, 2012

[quote author=Natasha,, link=topic=874534.msg10242008#msg10242008 date=1329835029][b] In Ephesians 5:6, it says, "Let no man deceive you with vain words: for because of these things cometh the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience. Be not ye therefore partakers with them.

self-service is a sin, our God is holy and His eyes cannot behold pour iniquities, a true Christians should not be ruled by the flesh, I loved the question someone asked, ''what does one think about when self-servicing?'' is it not enough to say its a sin, since all your focus is on sexually related things?

Galatians 5:19-21 , "Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these, adultery, fornication, UNCLEANESS, lasciviousness , of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God."

Joe was this part Omitted in your own Bible? ^^ you said self-service is unclean but its not a sin, can you now see that for something to be unclean then it doesn't go in line with God's word? now please defend your statement cheesy

Matthew 15:19-20a reads, "For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications , these are the things which defile a man."
when masturb@ting you defile your mind and your thoughts

James 1:14-15 tells us, "Every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin; and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death." This verse is telling us that all sin begins with a thought, and the thoughts which evolves in ones mind when masturb@ting are definitely not good thoughts

for those saying its not a sin
when you masturb@te does it lift you up spiritually or you rather feel a sense of guilt and shame?
[color=#770077]when you masturb@te do you think you are doing God proud?

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 , "For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds, casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ."

masturb@tion is a fleshy desire and as Christians we are to be ruled by the spirit, Our body is the temple of God it is not meant for us to do what we like. How can you be touching and rubbing your ** repeatedly . . , thinking of a Unclad girl or a Unclad guy and you're telling me its not a sin? really? the act of sex is to be fully enjoyed by married peeps.
galatians 16 -17 ''But I say keep walking in the spirit and you will carry out no fleshy desire at all, for the flesh is against the spirit in its desires . . . ''

thought the bible did not mention masturb@tion specifically , we can clearly see that its not an act that gives glory to God rather its an act of the flesh which defiles our body, mind and thoughts and therefore a sin.

Please we should not defend wrong teachings or swallow anything we're told just because our pastors said so
[/color][/b][/quote]1.The ephesians 5:6 you have quotted has nothing to do with whether masturbation is a sin or not. That is obvious.
2. Galatians 5:19-21 that you also quoted even buttressed my point;masturbation is clearly and curiously missing in the list of sexual acts that is termed as sin. You are busy asking Joe if this part was not in his bible when obviously you are ranting about a claim that is not in your quote. Joe is absolutely correct, it is a bad habit but the bible neither supports it nor condemns it, that is the fact.
3.Again, Mathew 15:19-20 never said anything about ma$turbation both implicitly and explicitely. Anything about masturbation in the bible are references to other pervasive sexual acts.
4. James 1:14-15 talks about lust of the heart. And that is where I said it is the thoughts behind the act that God explicitly condemned as a sin and not the act itself. Get that?
Finally, with regards to your questions about how one feels at the end of a jerk period, that line of argument is lame. How I feel about it later has no bearing whether the holyspirit to a flight from me or not, same argument can be applied to a man that feels bad after having sex with his wife, does it carry a different penalty fron the after feelings of masturbation? What a folly argument. People feel bad about it and yet they choose to get off every now and then, abeg come up with a better side note.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 3:43pm On Feb 21, 2012

niddamugu:
Why do we then condemn the Govt? Christianity is all about the Wisdom (Christ) of God. Read James 3v17: "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy". Let us call a spade a spade, I watched the videos (2mins & 8mins), there were no scriptural references to his utterances. They were purely "head knowledge", mere talk, no power behind the words. This is purely HERESY - Chris Oyakhilome has erred and needs to ask God for forgiveness. He should remove the "African Leaders Mentality" (ego & pride) from his mind and ask God for help.

Couples? Where did they get that from? Is it not from watching (or past views of) pornographic materials? Wise up pal, God is not (and cannot be) mocked.

you sound like one of those religious bigots that get violent when somebody disagrees with their belief. What is heresy in what he said? If you have got proof bring it out. You claim it was "head knowledge", whatever that means but you fail to back up your own claims with portions of the bible that says ma$turbation is a sin before God. Don't confuse your acceptable standards with the Tenets of the bible. I repeat again, where is your proof that Pastor Chris erred, don't just write an angry post like it has any meaning even when you can't come up with facts yourself.
Let us call a spade a spade, yes!! The bible does not condemn Masturbation let's stop confusing and mixing it with our own sense of decency, I know it is annoying to learn that but that is calling a spade a spade.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 3:29pm On Feb 21, 2012

[quote author=Natasha,, link=topic=874534.msg10241679#msg10241679 date=1329832641]It seems some folks are following their pastors and not God, Sioyou think because he is a pastor he can never be wrong? Holy sh1t which wan be unclean habit and sin unto God again? If something is unclean how on earth will it not be a sin unto God? , rhymes what he said was wrong, period, does self-service give glory to God? why do most people find different ways to stop self-servicing if its so much of a nice thing? [/quote]seriously you guys need to stop this nonense of thinking that just because I happen to support the pastor's stance on this, I am following him or sth. I am not even a member of Christ Embassy let alone follow him like an idole.
I am challenging you to give us bible chapters or verses where it is said that ma$turbation is a sin against. Where?? Quote it na. I care less about whether you feel it is right or wrong, the fact is, does the bible say it is a sin against God? The answer is an emphatical NO!!
It is a bad habit is different from it is a sin against God. People should learn to argue with open minds and in the right context. Bible has no provision for its condemnation, it is very obvious if you open your mind to see it. Pastor Chris got it very right. It is not a sin before God, ar least the bible never said it was, no matter how disgusted you feel it is, that is the fact. No add and no comot

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 2:30pm On Feb 21, 2012

teewai27:
The problem with many nigerians is that we think we know too much bible.we focus on condemning other just cos it mkes us feel good n righteous. The thing we miss is a personal relatnshp with God which cant be attained if we spend most of our time picking on other xtians. So what if pastor chris said that? Does it make it right or wrong?if u self-service n ure looking for someone to quote so u feel justified, look within urself. How do u feel wen u do it, ?or after uve done it?does the holy spirit condemn u?im sure many xtians feel guilty afterwards. Dats enuf reason to stop it. Its not about a pastor, its about u and ur God.

what exactly is your point? It is sin if you feel bad after jerking off and not a sin if one is not remorseful. If that is the logic then be rest assured that a lot of people feel damn good about both before and after doing it, that is why they go back to do it.

Christianity Etc › Re: Pastor Chris Oyakhilome- self-service Is Not A Sin. by rhymz(m): 2:24pm On Feb 21, 2012

rhymz:
Pastor Chris was very right in his submissions, if you say it is a sin against God please root your claims from the bible and not your own set moral principles.
Show in the bible where it was condemned or even talked about directly as a sin. I am surprised as well that inspite of the bible's very strong and clear condemnation of pervasive sex, it gave a very uncomfortable silence to the issue of Ma.$.turbation, a $exual act that obviously was even more prevalent amongst humans than say homosexuality and their likes. Could it be for a reason he chose not to give any direct or clear reference to the act of ma$turbation as a sin?. I believe it is more a question of the thoughts behind the act and not the act itself, for the act is almost a natural impulsion not any more differnt than a response to urination. This leads us to ask the very important question that no one has asked: IS IT BIOLOGICALLY POSSIBLE TO ma$turbate WITHOUT THE IMPUT OR STIMULUS OF WHAT GOES ON IN THE MIND? To put it succinctly:IS IT MEDICALLY POSSIBLE TO self-service WITHOUT LUST IN ONE'S HEART OR BEING THE STIMULANT.
That way, we can all come to an agreenent. But if we are to go by what the bible says, then we can conclude that at some point it can be a sin and at another point it is not a sin. And the bible has no dedicated chapter or verse that says anything specifically to deal with the act of self-service, let us get that fact clear. Whatever it is that is said about the act, are inferences and conclusions(which could be right or wrong) from other verses dedicated to the condemnation of other pervasive sex and in their case, they were explicitely mentioned.

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