₦airaland Forum

That’s just pure evil which I cannot do.
Once bitten twice shy though…
I gave a hookup N3000 for Tf. I am never doing that again. As she said after collecting the money , it was too late to come. One year later, I am still waiting for her to show.

Once a woman proposes to me.
I consider myself a catch. No groom price required.😜

Ofunaofu:
One of the most foolish decision ever made by this calamitous Tinubu government is the exchange rate unification nonsense


Instead of putting measures in place to drag the parallel market exchange rate down from 750/dollar to meet the official exchange rate of 460/dollar, the government move the official exchange rate up to meet the parallel exchange rate masking it as exchange rate unification.


After he must have removed subsidy from petrol without any single local refining capacity


How did we get here as a Nation

Why and again I ask remove subsidy without a bandaid in place. ?
He put the cart before the horse now the horse has stubbled and broken its shoe before it can trot !
I never voted for you but you are fighting too many battles on too many fronts at the same time.
Get a 6month supplementary budget ( which senate May shoot down since APC doesn’t have majority) and put the subsidy in place until the economic measures to let people breathe are in place and working.
Get the refinery up and running
Agriculture
Electricity
You need to generate income for the FG.

There is a global inflation and because Nigerians are yet to understand the implications they will continue to borrow loans increasing the personal debt and overall personal debt . You cannot give free money to people as this will also bring about inflation .
If you give free money , you also have to tax higher. Initiate Austerity measures …
Reduce the cost in making food so that it’s affordable to buy and also transport said goods.

Anyways who is listening !! I ain’t an economist .

Ooni:
Only very few non-yorubas know that the Yoruba nation is under a curse placed by alafin Aole in 1836.

So a single person placed a curse and all the religious institutions we have cannot intercede to break the curse ?
Was Nigeria even an entity in 1836 ?

It’s her mother house . At her age I was out and working some odd jobs.
Watch sex education !!

Dexy4yah:
I dated this lady for few years... doing our courtship we had unprotected sex.
I later relocated to another state because of my studies....that's how the relationship died.

She later got married

After about 13years of not hearing from eachother....one day my phone rang and behold she was the one...she called to tell me a secret...she said her first child is mine and not her husband's.
That doing our courtship she took in, she tried to abort it but it didn't work out for her, she didn't tell me about it because she knew that i was not ready to father a child at that time.

It was at that moment that she met this guy who is now her husband...the guy hasten everything and got married to her...she made him believe that the pregnancy is his own whereas that's was not the true...the boy is 8years old now.
She said her conscience has been disturbing her that's why she opened up to me.

I told her never to let the husband know about it and let the child be the husband's own....let her just forget everything about me being the father of the child so that her marriage won't crumble.
She has a loving husband and she is blessed with three kids aside the boy.


But she made one comment that when the boy reach 22years she will tell him who his real father is....she insisted. But am against it, i told her not to try it because if she end up telling the boy about it there is every possibility that the husband will end up knowing about it and i wonder how he is going to react towards it.

(Women can keep secret sha)
Please i hope i did the right thing??

The solution albeit difficult is easy one.
The woman should do a blood test and with the information confront her husband.
Inform him that before she married him she took in for an ex. She tried to abort it prior but it was unsuccessful. Here’s the result of the blood test . The man is nowhere to be found ( you ) . Will the husband adopt the child as his own?

What happens if you delay
1. If she waits till he’s 22 why 22 and not 18 when he is an adult before the law ? That is 13 more years. The man will never trust the woman again and will likely kick her out . This means she is starting from scratch at old age .

2 . She has more to loose at an older age . I’ll assume she is about 40. She can still date again if it comes to it .

3. Time can heal some wounds better she tell him that he figuring it out in an emergency.

4. I hope she’s deleted all what apps communication and phone calls
Between you two . Block and delete your number .

Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.

You are both to blame .
Him
1. For not speaking his mind , well if he did you likely won’t be married.
The Cow, Hall and other stuff must have set him back close to N500k.
I don’t understand why a man should go in debt because of tradition ? He starts off his marriage with -500k and has to work to balance account. How much did you contribute to the wedding ?
A great father would have made sure that he also contributed to the successful marriage of his daughter and not be a burden . ( not saying your dad isn’t a good one).

You :
There are 2 sides of the story and you have mentioned your side, I am sure there are other instances where you have taken sides against your fiancé/ husband and he’s felt betrayed.

In any case - Ask him how much debt he is in and see if you can help him pay it off .
Secondly, try to avoid saying my dad or my mum WANT anything !!!! That’s will just set off annoying bells.

Also try seeing things from his perspective- he seems like a nice dude

Love of convenience.
He gets a green card
She gets some mixed babies and government aid.

worksmart:
Your Dad's second wife's children are your half-brothers and half-sisters there are not step-siblings . In short they are you siblings period and even their mother cannot be described as a step-mother as you dad is still also married to your mother.

Technically, You are correct. But in reality more like step. He slept in our room while mum slept with our sister.
We boys would fall asleep in the living room.
Back then divorce & separation were pies in the sky for women.

Not everyone can be a banker, engineer or lawyer. Go earn trade work .
But also be careful- don’t think you’d get a job on day 1 from the airport. It could take you anywhere from 60-90days. Also be consider when you are going . Coming in winter will be longer - nobody paints in the fall /winter . So have a backup plan . Have your wife / gf learn nurse care/nurse aid or reverse. She learn trade , you learn nurse aid . So that during low season she can support the family

Let me share a story similar to yours and probably you can determine a course of action .

I am the first born of my parents and at a certain age. My dad decided that it was time I knew where all his properties were. So, one day he takes me to a school . He informs me that it’s a school he has built . I was shocked . To add to the surprise the way he was flirted with the principal, a female I knew something was up.
After 9 months, he picks me up from Unilag and we go to a baby naming ceremony. It’s the child from the principal my new half brother . He informed me that I cannot tell anyone. For 9yrs I carry this secret . Until one my cousins informs my mum that this is what he’s seen.
My dad inform my mother that yep, it’s true and out of respect is why he hasn’t broadcasted this in her face. But because he isn’t a Muslim he can’t officially bring the woman home . He asks now that she knows , how do they move forward. ?
Long story short - both wives have separate houses and vehicles . Both represented in his will . He visits both places 3/4 days a week.
We the kids don’t care about our step/half siblings . To everyone their own.

Your story get k leg . Can’t understand

ryloy:
Photo: WTO DG With President Bola Tinubu In His Office

Thesedrapes are terrible. Doesn’t look like an office space but rather home.

Ademola47:
This picture was taken today during the Nigeria (Super Falcon) vs England (Lionesses) Round of 16 match today.

As the subject reads, caption the photo...

Dog eat Dog

peretei2024:
My fellow Nairalanders,

Tell me why I must forgive my daddy and my Late Mummy.

I was 4years while my elder Sister was 6years when my daddy and my Mummy had a serious misunderstanding, so few weeks later, my daddy was transferred to Kaduna from Lagos being a Solder ( who knows I he was the on that requested for that).

On one fateful day, my Mummy went to the market to buy some stuffs in the Market, then here com my Daddy's younger Sister( Aunt) with a vehicle. She forced I and my elder Sister to the vehicle and moved is straight to my Daddy's village in Ondo State. We cried, cried ,
and cried but our tears couldn't saved us.

Finally we landed in a village where there is no light, no hospitals, no good schools, in the hand of strange people we don't know.

Remember I said we were moved when I was 4years. Now at 5years in the village, daddy never visited, mummy never visited, so I had to start tapping Palmwine just to raise money to start my Primary school in the village. After a year or so, I was able to get some money to pay for my Primary school. I decided that I can't continue with this Palmwine tapping at this year, so I work hard and raise some money to start selling bottles of kerosene to sponsor myself from Primary to Secondary school.

When I was in JSS3 , my Elder Sister got pregnant for a guy out of frustration and betrayal from the path of our Parents who abandoned us for years. Our Uncle in the village who never care about us , informed my daddy that his daughter is pregnant for a guy ooh, then my daddy said the guy must marry her . Finally the guy agreed, then my daddy who never visited us for over 15years came down to the village because of the money he will collect.

After marriage rites, I was taken to Lagos by my elder brother.

Note: my Mummy whom I never see for over 15years knicked me out of the house after spending just 1week with her in the house. Her complain was that I believe like a bush boy.

My elder Sister is still married to the guy in the village and she can't even express herself in English, and this is a lady that was born here in Lagos.

Tell me how I will forgive them after going through hell because of selfish Parents.

My mummy died 4years ago but I didn't even know where her grave is because we were never in good terms and till tomorrow, I will not forgive her not even my daddy.

They are dead !
You are justified at being angry but at this point you are limiting your progress in life.
Just make sure you don’t put your own kids through the harrowing experiences you went through.

Pwettylinda:
We learn everyday.
Science students and civil engineers why is this road designed like this in the middle of the forest?

Is it for cars to pack and for passengers to pee?

It is meant for emergency parking ONLY for kids or adult to relief themselves or change flat tire etc ?

See love ❤️. 😜

Donkogbe:
I have never been indulged in fraud or evil acts.
i have always work hard and earn legitimately.

My mother is sick and they created a family group on how we can help her to pay for operation else she will go blind and God sees my heart i have no money on me right now. why is it so difficult for God to bless me and i can be able to assist my own mother.

If you want prove and letter of appointment i can send it to you privately, for people thats think people just come up to form stories on nairaland.

i feel worthless and useless, suicide keeps knocking.

sometimes i feel my family is cursed or something, it is well

Money is of this earth and nobody is favoured by God over another. God will bless the seed in your hand. What work are you doing ? I have yet to see the Lord not bless someone in one way shape or form. It may not come as you expect but that’s simply because someone isn’t listening on the same Channel or frequency to give out a financial blessing.
In any case - you have asked for help . You failed to mention the value of help needed ?

Again - why wasn’t the time taken to implement this and then remove subsidy by September. It’s been 3months and the poor are suffering and suffocating. The elected officials in their wisdom increased their salaries whilst their own people are suffering and dying .
Which way Nigeria ?

mariahAngel:
They no longer want to operate in Nigeria, but still want to sell their products through a 3rd party distributor?

Costs cutting measures.

Well for me . I can smell when someone is sick or about to anyways . Nothing serious but things like cough , nasal infection . I smell it and it obviously smells bad so I wear a mask around them so that I don’t get infected

christe3153:
This is suppose to go ROMANCE, but site wont allow me. we have been together for 3 years now, so last year I decided to go for my MSC in Canada. First and foremost when I met her, my business was really booming, am an attractive 37 year old man with vibes, funny and every other thing most women would want in a man. But generally being a generous man,and because I liked her from day 1, I tend to shower her with gifts,attention and so much more than I moved her from her private hostel into an apartment 5months after we started dating and eventually bought her a nice car a year and the half after. Coupled with some weekly and monthly stipends that would make her life comfy. I know some people would think am a simp, either ways its life and we all do things differently anyways.

Throttling to last year when I traveled, before I did, I gave her a promise ring and made vows of what we would avoid to bring about stability while away from each other, infact she loved the move and almost did something that she usually would not allow me to do. I came back to Nija sometimes in March which was like after 5months apart. To me oo, I sensed her loyalty to me was up to date, and so did I. In as much as there was so many temptations I stayed true to myself and kept my own part of the vows and promise. I spent 10 days and came back here. Fast-forwarding to 2months ago, things started changing, I could sense she's cheating, my inner instinct told me something is not right. So when I sat down to analyze what could have gone wrong. I noticed it was probably because she was not getting much incentives as much as she was getting before. All these while being in Canada, when am horney, we do video sex, she shows me her buddy and all of that. Then months during trial period, we were talking and then asked for her to open buddy so I can do myself, she was like no oo she cant, I was like why, she said well she just dont know. I asked if there is a reason, she could not give me a reason, in which previously when we were video sexing, she opened up and I could see that she was having some sort of hemorrhoid sort of looking anus which I was aware of back then cos she does experience constipation once in a while. But the sight of what I saw looked more than that. So I had to take a snip of what it looked like so I can research if shes having a chronic hemorrhoid or maybe its the other way round. I opened up about my findings and told her she may need urgent medical attention, she was angry that I snipped her butt without her consent, I apologized and told her if I was gonna take permission to snip, she would not have allowed me and I would not have been able to determine whats wrong with her. After that time, we had done 3 or more sex video without denying me, but it was during the period that I she was now getting much from me that she decided not to do stuff with me again. So my question is, could it have been because I snipped her butt without her being told, although we have done more after I opened up to her, or could it be that its because shes not getting much from me?

Hmm - had to read it twice to understand.
I’ve never read someone describe himself as attractive ( usually in novels or at least with some humility ) in any case - some of my fellow NL have shared the answers and to surmise
1. You bought yourself a relationship . You lavished her with gifts and money. Moved her from hostel to a private place , bought her a car etc.
2. You never really had a relationship that flowed both ways. You gave and she did what ? Sex ??
3. Since the relationship was built falsely coupled with the snippet of her butt, she no longer finds you enticing and her feelings have dried up.
4. I really hope you were not planning anything serious with her cause dude SHE IS NOT THE ONE.
5. The Canada where you’re doing your MSC there are hundreds of single Nigerian Ladies available .
6. Get over the heartbreak 💔.
My 2 cents

If you were female - I have a couple of suggestions but other wise . You have not mentioned what you need the money for - it is based on your reason - you might find help. Nobody gives out handouts for free

I am sure there are people who could invest the problem is what guarantees exist that the person would get their money back with interest. ?
You have no land or property to act as collateral.
Plus you’re in kogi. If you fall sick or injure yourself - what next ?
I think it’s better your first sow into someone business ( work for someone ) save then establish your business. Nothing great comes easy

MXrep:
You all can see underground drainage here with much greenery and road sweepers because it's a major road.

Can you imagine how many people would be
taken off the unemployment list if you had
1. people clean up every week
2. cut the grass in the middle of the road as well as
3. plant flowers and water the flowers 🌺

What an idiot !
Aren’t igbo, Nigerians ?
This was a civil war not a World War .

teepain:
Well someone else may argue that when a patient is hemorrhaging the first thing to do is to stop the haemorrhage before additional interventions. If one likens the removed subsidy to the loss of blood, the speed of implementation may be justified. Only one who is privy to the accounting books of the country will be able to tell how bad things are. Of course, we all should have an idea that this economy has been near comatose since around 2013 when Okonjo revealed that FG was borrowing to pay civil servants. Subsidy ought to have gone since Jonathan proposed it in 2012 but it is better late than never. The other thing that needs attention is the cost of governance.

My counter argument would be since we all knew that the subsidy was going away why not cushion the effects of it , instead of ripping the bandage off the wound? What would a few months of keeping it in there whilst you make sure that salaries are increased and that you freeze government fares and make loans available for smb really cost us . someone who drives a Uber and used to charge N1400 for a trip due to cost of fuel which has tripped can’t charge N4200 . He’s out of business . There was a better way of saving the patient . What he mentioned during his broadcast to the nation came across as authentic but something which should have been down prior plus a date given when subsidy would end . It was chaotic and sudden

ogododo:
https://dailytrust.com/full-speech-tinubus-speech-on-current-economic-challenges/

mm

Great first step !
Allowing us know his thought process.

Next steps are duration of implementing.
One could have worked in reverse - which was leave the subsidy until a replacement plan was in place .
It’s like you going to a doctor needing stitches, the idea thing would be to have fresh stitching available, not remove the old ones and then looking around for new stitches.

Didn’t vote for the dude but all this is gonna take 2-4years to implement

ysgs:
RIGHT OR WRONG DECISION?

THEIR WEDDING IS FEW MONTHS AWAY.

He stays in Lagos and she stays in Calabar.
She went for a seminar in Lagos and decided to pay Him a surprised visit at home.

She got to his house around 9pm and met Him getting ready to retire for the night.

They were happy to see each other and she decided to spend the night and leave very early in the morning to her Aunty's place.

In the morning, she was already up and ready to move.

But he told her to hang on so he can drop her off on his way to the office.

So, she had a little breakfast while waiting for Him to finish up so they can leave.

He was ready and rushed to the dinning to have a cup of tea and few slices of bread as usual.
On getting to the dinning, he realized there was no milk and he checked the flask to confirm if his fiancée had made his tea.

Well, the flask was empty as well. So he called her to ask what happened.

And she responded by asking Him if he expected her to manage a tin of liquid milk for two of them.

She said she couldn't manage a tin of liquid peak milk for two cups of tea.

She admitted to have used the whole tin of milk because she doesn't like sugar in her tea as she prefers her tea very creamy and thick.

She further told him to drink mineral with bread if he really had the need for breakfast that morning.

While advising him to always stock his house with enough beverages to avoid such an occurrence as she wasn't ready to start managing milk.

He told her he was really disappointed she could only think of herself by using the whole tin of milk and not consider him despite seeing that was the last tin in the carton and he lived in an area that had no shops around.

He was aware he had just a tin of milk left in the house and he had planned to go grocery shopping by weekend due to his busy schedules.

She was an unexpected guest and he wasn't aware of her trip to Lagos so the issue of expecting her and making plans for an extra mouth was out of it.

This little episode brought an argument that almost led to exchange of words but for the matured way He handled it and readily apologized because he didn't want them to leave in anger.

They quickly settled and He dropped her at her Aunty's place, gave her money as usual with lots of hugs and kisses and left to the office.

2 days later, He called her to break the engagement and call off the wedding plans.

Reason: He said the milk issue had opened his eyes to the kind of insensitive and selfish woman he was almost getting married to.

He said it meant just one thing to him, that his wife will not be a good manager of his finances and home so he doesn't need that kind of woman as a wife.

*QUESTION: Was His Decision Right or Wrong

Well it was a red herring - the Milk
1. Do not “ surprise “ your other half - call ahead , he may not have been home and or Busy on a project and not have time for you .
2. It’s inconsiderate for her to finish the whole Tin of milk . Would she finish the tin of milk in her own house. She wouldn’t , nobody does.
3. For her to open her mouth and argue for him to her stock his house.
What should have come out her mouth was. I am very sorry dear .

It’s his decision and I stand by the dude.

Talk is cheap!
Great Idea . It’s the implementation that will be chaotic and almost impossible to see through .

You need to teach students the implications of loans and penalties of defaulting.
Granting loans now is just going to make inflation high .
Can the government tell us how much debt each individual has ?
Will the loan be co-signed ? When is it due back ?
What are the penalties for defaulting ?
Instead of loans use the money to subsidize education appropriately and make more grants and scholarships available.

Guys will apply for loans and use for business . Drop out will increase.

Tar all roads at the local , state and fed levels.
Fix electricity
Get the refinery working .
Increase teachers salary
Remove all beggar police from roads

[quote author=nairalandkachy1 post=124774995][/quote]It’s about freaking time!!!!!!

If possible he should also do a town meeting where he can take direct questions from the media.

The tray and maltessers